Chapter 2
Buffy looked out her bedroom window and saw Spike in his backyard, helping his mother with the yard. A look of annoyance past over her face as she watched his sweat covered muscles flex under his arms as he dug a hole. She was going to put an end to this right now. For the last week or so, he had acted differently around her. Not nicer, exactly, but just different. She couldn't pinpoint what it was and that bothered her. Their little conversation in the hallway after the misguided jealousy attempt hadn't been enough to put the last two years behind them, at least not for her. And she wasn't about to let him think that because of one moment in time, that all was fine between them.
Buffy bounded down the stairs and looked in the dining room to find her mother buried by paperwork. "I'm going next door. I'll be right back."
"You're going where?" Joyce asked, not sure she heard her daughter correctly.
"Next door. You know, over there," Buffy said, slowly, pointing.
"Are you feeling okay?"
"Very funny, Mom. I'm laughing on the inside. I'll be back."
"Honey, be gentle with William. You know all too well what it's like for him now with his father gone."
Buffy's eyes cast down and she felt a twinge of guilt pass through her. "I'll be on my best behavior." Seeing Joyce's doubtful look, she smiled and added, "I promise. I won't hurt him...too much." She ran out the door before her mother could say anything else. As she walked across the front lawn, she felt a tightening in her stomach and chest. She didn't like it. Buffy remembered the first few dates she and Angel had gone on, she had this feeling but not as strong as it was now. She knew what it meant then and she liked it. She didn't know or didn't want to acknowledge what it meant now and she didn't like it one bit.
She undid the latch to the gate and stepped inside, her eyes instantly going to Spike's back. She shook it off, pushing the word lickable that popped into her brain right back out again. Buffy saw Anne near the porch and she reprimanded herself silently. When she had left her house, Anne had gone inside, giving Buffy the perfect opportunity to chew Spike out. However, that plan now went down the proverbial toilet. She walked over to her, tapping her lightly on the shoulder. Anne turned and smiled, surprised to see the eldest of the two Summers girls' at her house.
"Hello, dear. Is something wrong?" Spike turned around when he heard his mother speak and he did a double take at seeing Buffy standing in his yard.
Buffy gave Anne an embarrassed smile, quickly trying to think of an excuse for why she would be there. "No, nothing's wrong. It's, uh, see, with the...Green's moving, we don't have Steven to do the lawn anymore. So, um, my mom was wondering if William could do it. She would pay him, of course." She briefly looked at Spike and started when she saw him watching them.
"Well, that is something you would need to talk to Spike about, honey, but I have no problem with it," Anne told her with a smile. "Why don't I let you do that and I'll get us some ice tea? Spike, luv, come over here. Buffy has a proposal for you." Spike's eyebrow shot up and he licked his lips slowly, making Buffy's breath hitch in her throat. "You two discuss and I'll get refreshments." She smiled once more at Buffy and went into the house.
"Proposing already? I'm touched."
"Look, we need someone to mow our lawn. Will you do it?" Buffy asked, putting on her best annoyed voice.
"What's in it for me?" Spike asked, giving her the once over. Buffy gawked at how brazen he was and decided that he wouldn't get the better of her. She could give it back as good as she got it.
She stepped closer to him, taking her time to look him over as well, cursing the word lickable that wouldn't leave her brain. "Oh, I don't know. I'm sure you could work something out..."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," she agreed. She took a step back and put her arms across her chest. "With my mother."
Spike smirked, knowing he set himself up for that. He put a disappointed look on his face and said, "Got my hopes up for a minute there, Summers."
"Hopes?" Buffy asked, screaming internally for the way her voice hitched at the question. Spike scratched his eyebrow with his thumb and the butterflies in Buffy's stomach went crazy. She really needed to get out of there. Like now.
"Sure, thought maybe you were coming to your senses." He took his pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket and lit one.
"How do you mean?" Buffy couldn't stop watching him smoke. She had no idea how he could make something so not appealing look like the most wonderful experience in the world.
"Thought maybe you were going to stop being a bitch to me all the bloody time."
Buffy's eyes widened at that and she scowled. "What the hell are you doing?" Spike looked at her, confusion running through his eyes. "You have been acting very strange lately. We didn't have some sort of break through last week, you know. It was just a minute of understanding between two people who can't stand each other. It happens."
"Understanding?" He grabbed her hand and put it on his arm. "I still have marks from our 'understanding'."
It took all of Buffy's might not to squeeze the arm, to feel the muscle beneath. It took willpower she never knew she had to not run her hand up and down the length of it and feel the sweat and dirt under her fingers. She wrenched her hand free and said, "You deserved it."
Spike didn't miss the look in her eye when she touched his arm. That was something he could work with. Willow told him what he had already known; look to her eyes to gage her reaction to things. Everything she felt and thought flowed through them and at that moment, he saw something that made him go hard at the thought of it. Lust. Pure and simple lust.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Buffy looked at him, surprised. "Probably not the best way to get your lips on mine."
"Uh..."
He stepped closer to her and brushed her hair behind her shoulder. "I'd rather not receive injuries when I kiss someone. But I should have known better...you do have a very violent nature."
"The hell I do," she yelled, shoving him away. That, she realized too late, was her first mistake. He grabbed onto her hands and kept them against his chest. Her fingers, apparently possessed by the devil, Buffy concluded, dug into his skin just a bit, just enough to feel him. Her eyes were fixed to that spot and she didn't notice Spike clenching his teeth, trying to regain some composure. He had no problem setting the scene but he was not making the first move. It was all on her.
She slid her hands down his chest to rest at his stomach. With Spike's fingers still clamped around her wrists, it made her exploration a bit more difficult to maneuver but what she was getting was fine by her for the time being. She lazily ran her thumbs up and down and was startled when she heard Spike gasp. She stepped closer, her body barely touching his and kissed him quickly in the space between his pecs. He watched her lick her lips, tasting the salt of his sweat and he made the decision to bugger all the plans that he and Willow had made.
He let go of one of her wrists and brought his hand under her hair, cupping her neck and head. She moaned softly as he rubbed his fingers against her scalp and he smiled slightly at her reaction. Her eyes finally rose to meet his and she knew there was no way this wasn't going to happen. Even she, despite all her protestations, wanted it. Needed it. Had to know if it would be as good as she imagined it would be. She only hoped two years of fantasizing about this moment didn't ruin it in any way. She leaned up on her toes, her chest resting against his. He slanted his head and moved in, mouth opened just a bit which she thought was incredibly sexy.
"Here we are!" Anne called as she came through the door. Buffy snapped her head away instantly and spun around, losing her balance. She fell on the ground and she thought she definitely broke her tailbone.
"Buffy, are you alright?" Anne asked, putting the tray on the table and running down the stairs.
Spike knelt beside her and looked at her, concern in his eyes. "Luv?"
"Don't call me luv," she said with a smile. He grinned back at her and held out his hand, lifting her up. "This is why I was never able to fulfill that dream of becoming a ballerina."
"Can you walk?" Anne asked.
"Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Just broke my butt, is all."
"Oh, good," Anne sighed, turning to go back to the porch. "So, did you two get everything worked out?"
Buffy and Spike looked at each other, a small smile on both their faces. "We're working on it," Buffy answered.
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"No, I want details," Willow said as they sat down with their mochas at the Espresso Pump. Buffy looked at her friend and shook her head. "Okay, how about a vague account? I don't need to know every single thing but something would be nice."
"You have just been waiting for this, haven't you?" Buffy asked, smiling.
"Me?" Willow said, feigning innocence.
"Don't bat those lashes at me. I'm not Oz. I don't fall into a big pile of goo at the sight." She paused, taking a sip of her drink, trying to collect her thoughts about what had happened the afternoon before. "It was just..."
"What?" Willow pressed.
"Well, look who's the eager beaver now? How quickly the tables can turn," Buffy teased. "It was one of the most electrifying experiences of my entire life."
"With lips like his, I completely believe that."
"We didn't kiss."
"Uh, what?" Willow asked, confused.
"I think we were about to but his mom came out and interrupted us and then I fell, broke my ass, and went home," Buffy explained.
"So you haven't seen him since then?"
"No and now that the moment is over, I think it should be kept at only that. A moment," Buffy decided, the tone of her voice betraying her words.
"But you don't want to do that," Willow said, instantly picking up on Buffy's sadness.
"Will, I know you're all gung-ho for something to happen here but just because we're apparently physically attracted to one another, it can't be based on that. Give me a William, dressed in his new uniform of black and not shirtless and glistening in the sun and he's still the same annoying person he's been since I've known him. The nakedness is what distracted me."
"Glistening, huh?"
"Lickable," Buffy answered, with a wry grin. "But there will be no licking because that would be bad."
"Bad, why? Angel's gone, probably moved on, thank god," Buffy shot her friend a dirty look and Will gave her a small smile to cover for her slip, "and you are obviously lusting after Spike so-"
"I am not lusting after him!"
"Wow, you have seriously set up shop in denial, haven't you?" Willow asked, rhetorically. "I think if you actually got to know him, you would be surprised. There's a lot going on in there."
"That may be but I'm not going to find out, Will, so let it go, okay?" Buffy practically begged.
"I don't understand it. Attraction? Number one thing, I don't care what anyone says. If you don't find them pleasing to the eye, nothing else is going to happen. It's not like you can see a caring nature or their brain from across the room." They giggled at the mental image and Willow continued, "And it seems to me that you two have the attraction thing in spades. 'Most electrifying experience of my life'? And you want to throw that away because..."
"Because I am perfectly content to dislike him. I get his lips and other parts involved and that could shift my current opinion of him."
"And that's of the good!" Willow said, exasperated. "Buffy, I know you love to hate him but maybe you could, I don't know...love to love him?"
"I really don't see that happening, Will," Buffy said, apologetically. "There's simply too much friction."
"And that wouldn't work."
"Nope."
"Right, I understand. I'll let it go."
"Thanks, Will." Buffy smiled at her in appreciation. "So shopping?"
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"Spike? It's Willow."
"I've been expecting to hear from you."
"We have a problem."
"Not from where I'm sitting. Everything is going along-"
"No, it isn't," Willow said, sadly.
"What do you mean? Didn't she tell you about yesterday? Isn't that what you chits do? Gossip about all of us?" Spike asked, hating the anxious sound in his voice but not being able to help it.
"She told me, but unfortunately she saw it as a moment of weakness due to your nakedness."
"Is that what she said?" he asked, grinning.
"You do know I'm breaking every code in the best friend manual by both telling you all this and helping you."
"I'm well aware. You only told me twenty times the other week. Need I remind you that this was all your idea?"
"I know, but I'm starting to feel a bit guilty. I feel like I'm betraying her..."
"Sorry, luv, but you are," Spike told her.
"You were supposed to say something other than that. You know, something encouraging and something that doesn't read you suck as a friend between the lines," Willow grumbled.
"Again, I say sorry but I call it like I see it." He heard Willow sigh and he added, "Red, I know you're feeling guilty but like you said before, you're doing this to make her happy. I promise you that I can do that. I will not waste our time with this."
Willow's frown disappeared at his words and she found herself nodding. Realizing he couldn't see her over the phone, she said, "I know you won't."
"Good, so where does that leave us?"
"Well, since Plan A didn't turn out the way I expected it to...I guess we go on to Plan B."
"I have to admit that I'm a bit disappointed that my ruggedly handsome mug didn't get the job done all on it's own," Spike half-joked.
"Almost, Spike, almost. She did say it was the most electrifying experience of her life," Willow told him, kicking herself for it but at the same time, wanting to give him some hope.
"No fucking way," he exclaimed. "Oh, sorry, Red."
"I'm not offended. If you tell her, I will cut off all your parts. Are we understood?"
"Crystal clear and I have a scary visual to keep it from slipping."
"Good. I don't know exactly what happened, other than you were interrupted-"
"Never wanted to hit my mother before that moment," Spike muttered.
"And what are you doing trying to kiss her? That wasn't part of the plan...you were only going to build it up."
"Yeah, well, man here...can only take so much."
Willow smiled and said, "Now that she's aware of the attraction, you can bet your bottom dollar that she'll be even nastier or she could ignore you all together. It's a fifty-fifty shot."
"That's not fair. Shouldn't she be more willing? Unresolved sexual tension and all that rot," Spike argued.
"Maybe for a normal person but we're talking about Buffy here. I know her and I know that she will lock up those feelings that came to the surface yesterday."
"So you're telling me I'm going to have to start over with knocking that wall down?"
"I guarantee it. Better put your thick skin on because you'll need it," Willow warned.
"Now for Plan B. What do you have in mind?"
"Well, you might not like it too much but just remember that she also used the word lickable..."
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Buffy was extremely proud of herself. She had thwarted Spike at every turn this past week and hadn't had to speak to him once. She was grateful that he didn't pursue her when she would take off but at the same time, she couldn't deny that nagging question in the back of her brain of why didn't he come after her? Maybe it was just a moment as she kept telling herself. Maybe the both of them were simply lonely and transferring feelings. Try as she might, though, the transferring part didn't exactly work for her, as she was well over Angel by the time he left. Sure, it hurt just as it does any time someone leaves you but she was looking forward to senior year all on her own, no one holding her down, having the ability to go out with her friends without having to call her boyfriend first to make sure he didn't want to do anything. She was free from all that. So why, she wondered, did she want it? And why when she did let her brain think about it, was Spike the man in the equation?
Shaking her head, she closed her locker, thanking the powers that be that it was Friday and she wouldn't have to be here for a whole two days. She turned and crashed into a body, dropping her bag on the floor. Buffy bent down to pick it up and mumbled an apology to the person.
"It's alright, dearie."
Buffy rose to a standing position and took in the sight of the girl from the courtyard. "I...I didn't see you."
"That can happen when things dance through your head."
"Um, yeah. Excuse me," Buffy went around her but Drusilla grabbed a hold of her arm. "Could you not touch me?" Buffy yanked her arm free and sarcastically said, "Thanks."
"You do, you know."
"I do what?" Buffy asked, furrowing her brow in confusion.
"Glow, just like he said you do." Dru took a step closer, wiggling her fingers in front of Buffy's face. "But he likes the darkness, you see. You do best to stay away from him."
"Look, crazy lady, I'm not near him," Buffy told her. "Well, I live next door to him but-"
"He'd go into your light if you let him," she whispered. Buffy's eyes went wide and her breath caught in her chest. "But I am his salvation-"
"Get bent, Dru." Both girls turned to look at Spike who was leaning against the lockers. "Let me amend my threat from before. Stay away from me and the people that I know." He walked to stand beside Buffy and she felt herself relax a bit.
Dru studied them for a moment before a wicked gleam passed through her eyes and her mouth curved into a smile that sent shudders down Buffy's back. "Together, you're...what's the word?" She paused, her eyes roaming over Buffy's face. "Electrifying."
Buffy's face flamed red and she began to sputter but no words came out. She quickly looked at Spike and saw the shock on his face. He turned his head slightly, his eyes meeting hers and he saw the confusion, as well as the embarrassment, swirling in them. She looked at Dru one last time before turning and running off down the hall.
"Buffy, wait!" Spike yelled and turned to run after her.
"Never say I didn't do anything for you, Spike," Dru said, laughing.
He turned, his eyes narrowing. "You go near her again, I'll throttle you myself." He took off down the hall and stopped when he saw Buffy talking to Willow. He couldn't hear what they were saying but he could see that Buffy was visibly shaken. He heard Buffy yell "I can't believe you" and watched her run off again, leaving Willow to look after her.
"Red?" he asked as he approached her.
"What the hell happened? Are you not a fan of your parts because I remember a very specific threat I made to them if you ever-"
"I didn't, I promise you, I didn't say a word," Spike interrupted. "Dru...she said some things that upset her."
"Well, duh, Spike!" Willow screamed, fighting back her tears.
"Where'd she go?"
"I'm not telling you another thing!"
He grabbed onto her arms, making her look him in the eyes. "Where did she go?"
"Home. I think she went home. Oh, god, Spike, she's never going to talk to me again." At that Willow broke down and Spike could do nothing but wrap his arms around her until she was all cried out.
"I'm going to go after her."
"Shouldn't be too hard. She lives right next door," Willow joked through her last remaining tears.
"Someone must be feeling better," Spike said, softly, running his hand over her head in a comforting gesture.
"Hey, is everything okay?"
They looked to see Oz standing there, the usual stoic expression on his face but his body language told a different story. Willow moved from Spike and wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and nodded into his shoulder.
"There was a bit of a misunderstanding," Spike tried to explain.
"Will?" Oz asked, concern in his voice.
"I'm a terrible friend," Willow cried. "She's going to hate me forever."
"No, she isn't, luv. She's just shook up is all."
"I'm thinking I missed out on a lot things," Oz ventured.
Spike nodded in agreement and said, "I'll talk to her. I'll fix this, Willow."
"You better or say good bye to your parts," she said, removing her head from Oz's shoulder to give him a small smile. He nodded in understanding and left.
"How about a drive down to Breaker's Woods?" Oz asked, pushing hair out his girlfriend's face.
"Okay...can we get some ice cream?"
"We can get anything you want."
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Spike fell onto his bed, glad the day had finally come to an end. He grabbed his alarm clock and set it for 10. He grumbled at having to get up so early on a Saturday but Anne had insisted he do so and he had no other choice but to do it. He ran his hands over his face, scrubbing it roughly. He was tired, aggravated and worried. He couldn't find Buffy anywhere. If she was home, she didn't answer the door or the phone. No one had seen or heard from her, either. Willow was beside herself, taking all the blame for what had happened. Both Spike and Oz, she had told him, tried to convince her otherwise but she would have none of it.
"Ow."
Spike shot out of bed and went over to his window. "What are you doing?"
"Trying to open the screen but I slipped. A little help please," Buffy whined. He opened the screen and grabbed her hand, helping her inside. "Thanks."
"Good way to get yourself killed, Summers."
"Yeah, well, there's a ledge thingy. I didn't expect to slip..."
"Easy to do when you're drunk."
"I'm not drunk!" Spike put his finger to his mouth to tell her to be quiet. "I'm not drunk!" she whispered loudly. He rolled his eyes and sat on his bed. She sat next to him and sighed. "I'm tired."
"Alcohol does that. What were you drinking?"
"Wine. Mom had wine. I had wine."
"Where is your mum?"
"Gallery trip. Very convenient for Buffy." She moved closer to him and leaned her head on his shoulder. "How did you date that freak?"
Spike chuckled and said, "Sorry about her, luv. She's a bit-"
"Crazy?" she interrupted.
"One of many descriptive words," he told her. "You should really call Willow. She's worried."
"I'm not talking to her just yet. I'm dealing with you first." Buffy moved her head so her chin rested on his shoulder, she breathed in his scent and let it out, tickling Spike's neck with her breath. "You've been ignoring me."
"I seem to recall you doing the running whenever I came near."
"But you didn't follow," she whined. He smiled at that. "Aren't you supposed to come after me?"
"You've made it fairly clear that isn't how our friendship works."
"We're not friends."
"Which would be why I didn't follow," he told her, the tension in his voice evident.
She ran her finger down his cheek to his jaw. "You're pretty."
"What every man loves to hear," Spike muttered.
"I miss your curls and glasses," Buffy whispered, putting her head back on his shoulder. He felt his stomach flip and he closed his eyes to calm himself. "What are you and Willow up to?"
"What?" he asked, his eyes flying open.
She sat up straight and turned to sit Indian-style on his bed. "You, Willow...what are you two doing?"
"I don't know what you mean." He hoped that playing dumb was the right way to go.
"That ex-bitch of yours and what she said...did Willow tell you?" She didn't look at him. Instead, she picked at nothing on his comforter. Her brain was beginning to get less fuzzy and that didn't make her all that happy. She didn't know if she could have this discussion with her inhibitions back in their proper place.
"Where is this all coming from? Dru is a loon, which I'm sure you could tell. She thinks the stars tell her things."
"She told me that I glowed. Does that mean anything to you?"
Spike's jaw clenched in anger. "No."
She looked at him, surprised. "No?"
He rolled his eyes up and she giggled. "What are laughing for?"
"When you get mad, you're muscles in your face spaz out."
"And that's funny?"
"When I'm tipsy, it's funny."
"How much did you have to drink?"
"A glass. I'm a lightweight. I didn't want to be drunk and I'm not. I just needed to loosen myself up a bit."
"For what?"
"For this. To talk to you. I didn't want to be that other Buffy. I wanted to be the one that was in the backyard last week."
"You were tipsy then?" Spike asked, not believing her.
"Not in the literal sense," she answered quietly. "Do you like me?"
"You're not so bad. You can be right annoying at times but you have your moments."
"Wow, my heart's fluttering," she said, sarcastically.
"Yes."
"Huh?"
"Do I like you? Yes, I do."
"Oh," Buffy gasped, taken aback. "Good."
"Good? We've done nothing but fight for two years-"
"Yeah, but we can stop doing that, can't we?" Spike nodded, not able to find his voice. "So you and Willow-"
"You're not letting that go?"
"I can be just as tenacious as Will when it comes to things I know I'm certain about."
"That's obvious," he mumbled.
"Aha! I knew it." Buffy let her smile fade as she remembered that meant Willow had to have betrayed her. "Willow told you everything, didn't she?"
"No, not everything." He knew lying could create a problem but he didn't want this tentative beginning to ruin her relationship with Willow. He would not be the cause of that.
"I don't believe you."
"That's your prerogative."
She placed her hands flat on the bed and leaned forward, leaning into him. "Do you want something to happen...with us?"
"You're drunk," Spike said softly.
"No, I'm not. I have complete control over everything I do and say." She looked down, took a deep breath and lifted her gaze to meet his. "Don't you want me?"
He couldn't stand the look in her wide, glistening eyes. She looked so...he wasn't sure. There was something there that he didn't recognize, didn't know what it was. It was something deep in her, something she didn't let anyone else see. But he could see it. Whether it was the alcohol that allowed it to show through or just the moment, he could see something that he instinctively knew no one, not even Willow or her mother, had ever seen.
He lifted his hand, running the back of it down her cheek and offered her a small smile. "More than anything, Buffy."
She let the smile pass over her lips before she sat back on the bed, away from his touch. "If that's the case, you'll tell me everything. I won't be lied to."
"What's the point? Whatever happened, it got you here."
"Yeah, but I can just as easily leave again," she threatened lightly. "Spike, please, I want to know. I won't be mad." She saw his mouth drop open and his head tilt, a look of awe in his eyes. "What?"
"You called me Spike."
"Did I? Huh...I like it."
"Thought you hated it."
"Yeah, thought I hated you...looks like I was wrong about that, too." She had seen many faces of Spike, mostly all that pissed her off to no end but the look he had now was one she didn't think she'd ever seen before. Happiness. A great smile erupted on his face and his eyes twinkled in a completely different way than when he was being an ass. She decided she liked it. She wanted to see more of it. "So you'll tell me?"
"Sure, I'll tell you but I get to keep all my limbs and you have to call Willow first thing in the morning."
"We have a deal," she said with a smile, holding out her hand. He slowly placed his hand in hers and she could feel the goose bumps rise on her skin from his fingers grazing over her palm. She wondered if he felt it to or if it was all in her head. She ran the tip of her index finger along the inside of his hand and he sighed. She smirked. It wasn't just in her head; he noticed it as well.
"I'm going to kiss you now," Buffy announced. Spike's eyes went wide and she smiled. As she leaned towards him, she said, "You have about five seconds to stop me." When Spike made no move to do so, she licked her lips and her breath hitched when she saw him open his mouth again. It looked like he was about to devour her and she couldn't wait. "Is your mother going to interrupt us again?"
"Buffy..." he breathed out in frustration. She was toying with him, whether she was aware it or not, she was. Her lips only a mere inch away, her wine-tinged breath on his face and her scent enveloping him, that perfume that always sent him into a tailspin whether she was attached to it or not. She moved one leg over his lap and straddled him. She ran her fingers through his hair and sighed.
"It's so soft. You'd think with all that gunk in it and the bleach, it would make it coarse." She barely placed her lips on his cheek and he felt his lower half spring to life. She moved her mouth along his jaw, continuing the torture. She moaned in contentment and he surprised himself with the amount of self-control he was in possession of.
"You smell nice," she whispered, nuzzling his neck. She sat up and looked into his eyes. "This could change everything."
"You think highly of yourself if you think one little kiss could change-" He was cut off by her smashing her lips to his. She lightened the pressure when she was sure he wasn't going to continue talking. She ran her tongue along his bottom lip and up along the opening of his mouth. She bit his lip gently and he moaned in response. Spike's hands wrapped around her back and gently massaged up and down, causing her to shiver against him. She absently grinded herself down in his lap and he pulled away, breathing heavily.
"We're done kissing?" Buffy asked with a pout.
"Not even close," he said, swooping in to recapture her lips.
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