Welcome to My World

Kayo

Chapter XVIII: And Here We Thought Our Troubles Were Over

As the group neared the Star residence door step, Shawn once again asked for an explanation of how he was the one to send Legolas home. Jared smacked the back of his head.

"Okay: for the LAST TIME: Seeing as how it takes major energy to bring Middle Earth people here, the goal post portals would attract people with hidden energy to help lessen the strain on Sauron, who of course was not there at the time. Seeing as how you've been the only person around Legolas for the entire weekend, I'd say you're the source of power."

All that Shawn could muster was an, "Oh."

They rounded the drive way and came to the door. Shawn had the brief thought they were forgetting something, then brushed it aside. Everything was taken care of. Megan was home safe, Jared would be patched up by Legolas, and no one knew about Elidh, as far as Shawn knew. Life was good. That is, until he opened the door.

It seemed quiet. Almost too quiet. The quiet where you know there should be sound, like a bug chirping or something of that sort. But there was no such thing as the door slowly creaked open. Shawn could've sworn he had left the lights on. Apparently not. Damn you lamp that is across the room! He started to walk inside, still carrying Megan in his arms, when a breeze brushed past him. That was odd. Is a window open?

There is something in here, murmured Legolas. Jared clutched his bleeding side while translating for Shawn. A thought occurred to Shawn.

"Nina? Chloe? You here?" There was no answer. But Legolas had said someone was in the house…What did that mean for them? Shawn hoped to high heaven that they weren't walking into another Middle-Earth trap. Legolas walked into the house first, trusting his Elven sense to guide him through what could be a very bad predicament. Jared was propped on Shawn's shoulder, another burden to the Megan-carrying boy. Yep, I'm the pathetic normal human who gets to carry everyone.

Legolas was making his way down a dark hallway when he heard giggles. Evil giggles. The giggles of, dare he think it, fangirls. He spun around. He should've been able to see them in this light. Wait. Hadn't Jared given the two girls a magical cloak thing that turned them invisible? Legolas's eyes almost bugged out of his head.

Legolas opened his mouth to scream warning to Jared and Shawn when a hand was forced over it. Suddenly, he felt something touching around his pants, and a gust of wind was immediately apparent. Legolas struggled and easily escaped the grasps of the two invisible girls and ran for dear life. He made it to the floor, scuttling since his pants were down, and was attacked from the back as one of them through herself on top of him. He landed on the floor with a thud and shouted out for help. Jared proceeded to laugh and clutch his painful wound as Shawn attempted to balance the two people leaning on him, all the while chuckling.

Why won't you help me?!? He cried out desperately when he felt another load of weight crush his ribs. If his pants hadn't been so rudely torn down, he would've easily been able to push the two girls off. However, in the hysteria and lack of balance, he only managed to roll onto his back, which he realized was a big mistake.

Come hither, oh creature of the woods, one girl, he thought Chloe, whispered into his sensitive ear (which by the way hurt from the concert excursion). A kiss was planted on his cheek and he felt Nina (he figured) jump off him and started to drag him away by his feet. The invisible figures continued to grope the poor forlorn Elf. His cries were lost as Shawn's bedroom door was closed.

That was quiet entertaining. Don't know when's the next time I'll see an Elf raped by invisible girls, but hey. He shuffled himself into the dark house, turning on the light next to the couch as he set Jared down on it. Jared muttered a thanks before Shawn left to tuck Megan into her bed. He didn't want to leave her, but he had other things to attend to: as in rescuing Legolas from the clutches of Chloe and Nina.

~*~

DO NOT TOUCH ME THERE! Shouted Legolas as he jumped up from the floor and backed himself against the wall. The magical cloak blanket thing had fallen off when they had entered the room, leaving the two girls vulnerable to Legolas's keen eyes. It hadn't really mattered anyway. He could slightly hear their footsteps, but most certainly he could feel their breathing and where they were touching him. This didn't stop them, of course. And once again Legolas was looking for an exit from Shawn's room.

He saw his tunic lying on the floor from the previous day's party. Why had he changed out of it? He thought back. A sudden flash of coke being spilt all over himself was enough of a memory. It seemed like such a long time ago, yet it was only Sunday. Oh the stories he would be able to tell Aragorn and Gimli when he went back to Middle Earth. A sudden flash of guilt went through the Elf. Merry and Pippin. They still needed his help. They were depending on him. Legolas would've thought about this more if not for the fangirls. Chloe and Nina were rounding around the bed again, just as they had the previous day before. The only difference this time was that Legolas's pants were down and he was having difficulty walking around.

Legolas! Why won't you love us?!? Shouted Chloe.

"Legolas! Please let us show you our love!" Legolas paled at the thought when Chloe translated for Nina. Deciding he would take evasive action, he threw off his pants and went for the window. With a simple shove it was open and he was out, shimmying down the tree he had used before. Thanking Elbereth for the stupidity of the fangirls for having not blocked off the exists of the room they knew they were going to bring Legolas into, Legolas made his way for the front door to help heal Jared.

Nina and Chloe were at a loss for words. Why hadn't they fucking nailed the windows closed?!? Or cut down the tree?!? It was so simple too!

"Nina, we lost him again."

"That we did."

"But we saw his ass."

"That we did."

"And we lost the invisible cloak…'cause it's kind of invisible."

"That we did."

"So now we're going to go harass him, right?"

Nina turned to Chloe and smiled at her. "Was there ever a doubt in your mind?"

~*~

And why don't you have pant on? Jared asked Legolas as Shawn let him in the front door.

I had to get out of the room, Legolas said defiantly. And to take them off was the best course of action. Everyone in the room (except for Nina and Chloe who were still in Shawn's room), which would just make it Shawn and Jared, looked at Legolas. Well not at Legolas, but at a certain part of him. A, shall we call it, no-no zone. Legolas noticed this and blushed furiously, pulling the goth looking black shirt as far down as it could go. He couldn't wait until he got his tunic back.

Shawn just sighed and went to his room. Nina and Chloe were just about to leave it when he opened the door.

"HEYA BOYO!" Yelled Chloe, saluting him. "Did you have fun killing people?" Shawn rolled his eyes.

"Could one of you get me Legolas's pants? We're not too fond of seeing naked Elves in the house."

"NAKED ELF!" They both yelled and attempted to squeeze by Shawn. He held out his arms steadfast.

"Get me his pants or I'll have him neutered." Nina pouted and went to retrieve the pants.

"Touchy touchy. My god, what is it with you and treating him like a dog?" She threw the pants at his face.

"Thank-you!" He closed the door with them still inside. They began to bang at it and tried to twist the knob. Shawn, however, creatively arranged it so that only someone from the outside could open the door.

"WHAT GIVES?!" Shouted Nina. "LET US OUT!"

Shawn stifled a laugh. "Ya right. So you two can molest him again. Just let the Elf rest for a minute! He has to help take care of Jared anyway. And Meg's asleep, so stop freaking shouting. Once we're all good, maybe I'll let you out." He started to walk away, his footsteps echoing down the hallway. He heard his girlfriend shout as he entered the living room.

"Ima gonna dump you!" The threat held no interest in Shawn. He knew she wouldn't. Just had to let her get over the fact she wasn't going to see Legolas for another hour.

"Woman problems?" asked Jared.

"Could we blame this on PMSing?"

"I s'pose. Or we could blame it on the looks of Legolas. I mean, girls faint at his sight and would do just about anything to be near him. If only we could put that to good use."

"True dat."

"Shut up Shawn, you're not black."

Legolas watched the two exchange verbal abuses all the while patching up Jared's side. The wound wasn't too deep. It was a little funny when they thought about it. Jared got his ass kicked with his own weapon, and it was a stick! But such is the life of an Istari.

They ended up watching the news somehow, forgetting, or choosing to ignore, Nina and Chloe in the other room. Shawn figured if they got bored, they could sneak a peak at some more of his porn.

"What? You got one with naked guys in it?" Shawn almost killed Jared. Almost. "Look, I don't think two girls want to see other girls naked. In fact, I'm sure of that. I had this conversation with Taylor before we broke up."

The news broke into their discussion. "Edison High School will be closed due to the phenomenal appearance of what the government has deemed 'a total mystery.' The bodies of the dead orcs, as most citizens have come to assume, have been removed from the football field where they were discovered by a group of football players and cheerleaders on their way to the football game. Scientists have been called in to determine how these creatures came to be here and what killed them. Stay tuned."

Shawn clicked off the tv. He had totally forgotten about the orcs and how the football field would be surrounded even now. It was only Sunday. Only two days ago Legolas had shown up. And by the looks of it, he wouldn't be leaving any time soon, even though they didn't need to wait for Jared to recover.

Legolas himself was disappointed. Jared told him what the lady on the tv had said. When would he be able to go home and help the hobbits? Would he ever go home? Would Nina and Chloe try anything while he was still there? (That question was an obvious yes.) And would he ever get out of the punk clothes?!?

Resolving that he was going to clean himself up, Shawn told him he could crash in his father's room while he and Jared stayed on the couches. Always the good host, Shawn was. He even let Legolas take another shower, must to Nina and Chloe's dismay when they heard the sounds of Elven singing.

The night was rather quiet. Sometimes the house would give off a small creak, but other than that, the company's rest was peaceful. That is, until a dark figure burst through the door, bringing with him the stench of beer and cigarettes, along with the giggles of two ladies. Enter Shawn's father.

tbc…

Responses to Reviews:

Das Blume: The Official Fanfiction University of Middle-Earth!! That fic is GREAT! ^__^ Toey, I love him! I kinda want to read that fic again now! Never really read the sequel though. Don't know why…Mormons? Affairs? Huh?? I know a mormon, haha, we call him Mormon Joe. Ya, Shawn be going to jail by the end of this fic for all the bad things he's done!

Nina: Hahaha, no I wasn't serious about them being aliens, though it would make for a good twist right? Legolas gets probed by alien fangirls! ^__^ Imagine the possibilities! Okay, the hole in Jared isn't like a HOLE hole, it's more of an open bleeding wound hole that doesn't go through him. Ya I should've explained that better! ^_^;;

Lindiel Eryn: Yay for Canada! ^_^ Actually, I hadn't even thought of Narnia when I was writing that, but hey, if the boot fits! I actually saw the cartoon version of the movie when I was little, sadly, I never read the books. U_U please don't hurt me!! I have hot Legolas ass!

namarie2legolas: You have goats? And they seem to be dying? How odd. My friend told me about how a firefighter fell into the cow graveyard and onto a rotting corpse of a dead cow. Ya, she owns a farm. Is Mr. Ishizoki Japanese? I'd've called him Mr. Ichycrotchy! Hahaha, elf fat for soap! I LIKE IT!

Kitten: ^_^ umm ya. Inanimate objects. And they're talking. Or maybe…they're ALIVE @.@ My sister scared me once and told me my playhouse furniture came alive at night and danced around my room. Freaked me out.

lolly pop: No I don't think you've reviewed before. I KNOW ALL! Hahaha, just kidding. ^_^ I'm glad you like my story! Ahh, a fan base, tis my greatest love.

TitanicHobbit: R.O.U.S.=Rangers of Unusual Size. ^_________ ^ I love The Princess Bride! I was so going to be Prince Humperdink for Halloween, but I couldn't find stuff for my costume. Woe is me.

And we are slowly coming to an end! I wanted to make next chapter the last one, but I dunno. We'll see what happens. School is insane. And I'm always babysitting my nephew! The little terror he is. Well, see y'all later!