Author's Notes to self and others: I –STILL- don't own Naruto (everyone knows this, why do I bother saying it?), I just use the characters and twist them into my own personal fantasies. All I have is a Kakashi cosplay outfit that I made! O_o Official gloves and everything u_u *cackles* Did I mention I have a wall scroll, Naruto and Kakashi figurines with standup background, and a keychain too? Oh! And an Iruka plushie! *hugs*
Warning: Yaoi! :D Well….nothing too bad, but it's Kakairu ^_^ *giggles happily*
Oh, THAT book!
Anatra DeSylvianno
As Sakura rounded the bend, heading for the bridge at their usual meeting place, the girl was immediately halted in her tracks. Her bright eyes widened in surprise and confusion. Where there was usually a quiet, sullen Sasuke, standing all alone waiting for the rest of his Team Mates, was instead a quiet, sullen Sasuke being talked to by a certain Jounin. For once in their careers as Genins, Team 7's Sensei was NOT late for their scheduled meeting.
"Kakashi Sensei!!!" the girl cried out excitedly, running over to him quickly and skidding to a halt beside him. "You're not late!" Sakura exclaimed happily before suddenly becoming immediately suspicious. "What's wrong with you!?" she examined Kakashi carefully, trying to see if it was an illusionary jutsu.
Kakashi wasn't about to tell the naïve Sakura that he was sexually frustrated because Iruka was denying him ANYTHING and that he was pissed off at Naruto for stealing his erotica and then having it get confiscated by the aforementioned Academy Sensei. Instead, he just shrugged and grinned at her with one eye. "I was just excited to see you all this morning!" Kakashi says fakely. Sakura just folds her arms and stares at him.
"Liar" she hisses under her breath before turning to grin winningly at Sasuke. "Hey Sasuke-kun!" Sakura purrs, "What are your plans for tonight?" The other boy eyes her and twitches, trying to ignore the female part of his team.
Kakashi sighed and looked around. The only student he was actually interested in seeing this morning was a certain orange-suited brat! Naruto was on his 'painful death' list, along with Gai-Sensei and Asuma….for that rather embarrassing drunk incident a few years ago. "Oh well!" he suddenly exclaimed, getting a terrible, horrible, evil little idea. "We're going to start now! Lots of hard training to do today!" the Sensei announced proudly. "Lets get going!"
Saukra headtilted, slightly confused. "But Kakashi-Sensei….aren't we going to wait for Naruto?" she asked. Not only was Naruto late which rarely happened, but Kakashi was early, which never happened. The least Team 7 could do was wait for the other member of their band!
The copy ninja shook his head, chuckling quietly. As he did so, his hair flopped comically back and forth. It seemed as if he had spent very little time working on his physical appearance this morning. "No…if Naruto can't learn to be on time, he's going to miss out! Of course…his absence won't go unpunished, so never fear Sasuke and Sakura…." He gushed, ruffling their hair. "I'll make sure everything works out in the end!"
Sasuke had recently discovered he did NOT like having his hair ruffled…with a bit of a twitch he pulled away from his teacher and snarled quietly, seriously debating whether he'd get away with biting one of Kakashi's fingers off. Of course, the aforementioned sensei was clueless about the impending doom of one of his digits but stopped all the same, re-adjusting his bag on his back and leaping off towards the training grounds.
Startled at their Sensei's sudden flight, the two students darted off after him in pursuit. They made their way at blurring speeds towards the place where Gai's team usually trained. Sasuke spotted Kakashi up in a tree, talking to the other 'unique' sensei. Of course, Gai's three ninja students were already there, involved in some sort of exercise which involved Lee being tied up with TenTen's charka threads while Neji….
Sasuke and Sakura stopped dead in their tracks as they watched what was happening. The pink-haired female squealed in surprise, a hand clapping over her mouth to stop the further loud protests and exclamations. Sasuke just stared, eyes widening in disbelief. "Lee!" she cried out. She was of course still in love with Sasuke, but nobody wanted to witness what was happening to the freaky eye-brow boy.
Three angry glares turned immediately to stare at the intruding Sakura and Sasuke. Sasuke sweatdropped and prodded Sakura angrily in the back, "Baka…." He hissed in her direction. She'd interrupted the show, the thoughtless bitch! Sakura just stared what was happening before her.
"TenTen! I demand that you release Lee immediately! Neji! Put your kunai's away! How is he supposed to dodge those while he's restrained by charka!?" the fuming Sakura demanded.
Neji just shrugged, he's too hard to hit when he's free to move around…as it is he has three feet of slack. If he was doing a mission in crammed conditions, worse than this, how is he supposed to dodge if he has no experience doing such a thing?" the Hyuga asked, voice superior and calm. Sakura just glowered at him, not intimidated by his milky gaze.
"He's bleeding you heartless fuck!" Sakura screamed, motioning wildly at Lee whose ripped and torn forest-green jumpsuit was stained with patches of blood. By now, Lee had caught his breath and had finally clued in as to what was happening.
"Sakura-chan! You DO care!!!" he gushed, running towards her, eyes filled with hearts meant only for her. Sakura screamed in revulsion and backed away, stepping into the startled Sasuke. He snorted and roughly shoved her into Lee's outstretched arms before leaping off in search of Kakashi who seemed to have disappeared.
Meanwhile, Naruto was really confused to find the bridge deserted. "Sakura-chan? Sasuke?" he called experimentally. He looked upwards and around, suspecting a trap, a trick, a… "Anyone!?" he asked again, still frowning at the bridge suspiciously, expecting a thong-clad Kakashi to jump out and molest him at any minute. True, Iruka-Sensei had reassured him that Kakashi would do nothing of the sort, but it was still highly distressing for him considering the scene he had witnessed only the night before. Suddenly, a terrible chill ran up Naruto's spine. Turning around, he stared with terror-stricken eyes up at his leering Sensei.
"You're late." Kakashi stated, looming above his panicked student. Naruto promptly let out a scream of bloody-murder and passed out. Sasuke arrived, just in time to see this as he finally caught up with his sensei, leaving Sakura at the mercy of one of her admirers. See how she liked being stalked relentlessly at all times!!! He looked questioningly up at Kakashi who simply shrugged and scooped the downed gaki in his arms and took off once more. Sasuke cursed and followed Kakashi's trail.
Back at their usual training grounds, Kakashi set Naruto down and proceeded to kick him into wakefulness. Sasuke was slightly surprised at his teacher's attitude towards the other ninja. Sure he was an annoying, loud-mouthed brat, but it was startling to see Kakashi be so rough with him. Naruto moaned and rolled over, whimpering slightly. "Please don't spank me and rape me in the forest!" he wailed, curling into a foetal position. Sasuke began choking and immediately started a coughing fit. Kakashi thumped him on the back, laughing nervously.
"Naruto! How dare you say such things!?" the copy-ninja demanded angrily. "Just for that, I'm adding to your punishment for being late!" he announced. Naruto rolled over and looked up at his sensei with watering cerulean eyes. Before he could speak in his own defense, Kakashi scooped him up by the collar of his gaudy orange jacket and set him on his feet. "You are to do 300 laps of the village immediately." Naruto nodded shakily and turned to set off. Kakashi's restraining hand halted his progress. "On your hands… If your feet touch the ground, you have to start again."
The fox-possessed boy froze and turned to stare at his Sensei in horror. "You can't be serious!!!" he wailed, immediately complaining before even attempting the assignment. "No way anyone could do that! Not even Sasuke!" he stated, crossing his arms angrily over his chest and pouting heavily. Kakashi would have laughed or perhaps taken pity on him if it hadn't been for Naruto's previous actions the day before. "Hells Sensei, I bet even YOU couldn't do it!" he yelled, pointing wildly.
Sasuke stared at Kakashi with a raised eyebrow. Dobe was right. He doubted that even he could do it. Not without serious training before hand. The village was not that big, but it was certainly much larger than it appeared when one had to run around it. It would seem indescribably larger if one was forced to do this on their hands without respite. He chuckled at the other boy's plight. "Of course we could both do it baka, you're the only weakling here." He stated imperiously before snorting and turning away from Naruto disdainfully.
Naruto just shook with rage at Sasuke's words before pointing at the darker-haired ninja accusingly. "You shut up Sasuke! I'm Uzumaki Naruto, I'm going to become the hokage one day and I'm going to kick your ass!"
Kakashi turned on the orange-suited gaki. "Just get going!" he urged, "Sasuke and I have important training to do, as do YOU." He reminded Naruto who sulked a bit but dropped to his hands and began trying to balance on them alone. Kakashi snickered behind his mask and motioned for Sasuke to follow him. "We're going to train your sharingan today…" he stated casually before walking into the centre of the clearing and idly turning around, "Start again Naruto…your feet touched." He called out lazily.
An angry scream could be heard from just within the tree line. "Shit! I haven't even started yet!" Naruto hollered. Kakashi just cackled evilly, giving Sasuke reason to doubt his sensei's sanity yet again.
"Kakashi Sensei?" Sasuke asked quietly, "What's going on? You are acting more strangely than usual." He stated delicately. "Why are you making Naruto do that kind of training? What did he mean about you spanking and raping him?"
The copy-ninja's one visible eye widened. "Err…" he muttered, "I just remembered….I…have to, feed the nin-dogs!" the sensei exclaimed before disappearing in a puff of smoke. 'How awkward' he mumbled to himself once he was safe at home. Sigh….home sucked. Iruka had come over late last night and confiscated the rest of his erotica collection. He'd even discovered his last stash of hentai manga and had taken it. "Probably for his own use!" Kakashi yelled bitterly at the wall.
A light chuckle resounded in the room, startling the high-level ninja. "Now now Kakashi-koi…..don't lose your temper!" Iruka scolded, emerging from the wall, tossing the camouflage sheet onto a nearby chair. Kakashi's visible eye lit up.
"Ooh…so you come crawling back eh Iruka-kun?" he purrs, "You needed some of that Jounin lovin' eh!? Your own hand not half as satisfying as thiiiss!?" he asked, leering and rubbing his hand downwards from his stomach. Kakashi was not prepared for the hearty slap promptly delivered across his face. "I'm not so sure I deserved that…" he whimpered, rubbing his quickly reddening cheek.
Iruka growled at his lover. "You VERY much deserved that you hentai! I was here to discuss a few things with you that I think we need to get straight!!!" he snarled, "Not to have sex! Is that all you think about!? Is that the only reason you like me!?" the Academy Sensei demanded.
Kakashi shook his head wildly. "No no no Iruka-koi! I DO love you for your personality and your brain! For everything about you! Your delicious body's just part of what I feel for you!" he said, trying to express his love for the teacher. "You damn well know that too Iruka!" he whined sulkily.
Iruka sighed. Kakashi was just too cute when he sulked because his lower lip stood out against his facemask and made for an absolutely adorable look of vulnerability and innocence on a man who was neither of those things. "Koi….I just want you to not take out your frustrations on Naruto-kun. I saw what you've asked him to do! And as much as I agree that the boy needs discipline and training, the task you've set him is much too difficult. He'll not be able to do it!" Iruka stated huffily, "Not only that, it's not right for Naruto to take the blame for something that you brought on yourself! If you didn't read that perverted book all the time, he wouldn't have been tempted to steal it!"
Kakashi blinked, "He still did steal it though…." The jounin pointed out, growling. "Anyway, if Naruto manages to complete this with minimal cheating, he'll be much stronger, and it will have helped him on his…" he stops and makes a teasing gesture, raising his fingers to create little quotes, "Path to becoming Hokage." For this, he simply was glared at by his lover and Kakashi hung his head dejectedly. "Aww common 'Ruka…"
The other ninja interrupted him, "Not one more word Kakashi. I've said my piece…I'm off." He stated before leaping out through the open window, the way he came, leaving Team 7's sensei standing alone, still horny, and rather depressed.
"Dammit." Kakashi said, flopping down in his chair and planning even more horrendous things for Naruto, and even more delicious things to do to Iruka when he was finally back in favour with the Academy Sensei. "Mwee hee hee" Ah, the giggle of a pervert.
End of part 3
*insert the crazy new ending theme with the absolutely adorable chibis walking across the screen* SQUOO!!!