Disclaimer: All the characters belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox,
etc... except of course the ones I make up.
Summary: Spike and Buffy are going to have a baby together!!! I know, I know, it's been done about a million times but I promise that this one is different. Anyway, it also deals with all different types of families that could exist in the Buffyverse.
Spoilers: None really
Continuity: It's the sequel to "Apocalypse now... Again". However, you don't really need to read it to understand this fic. It picks up a few weeks after where "Apocalypse Now... Again" leaves off. Also, I just thought I'd point out that Tara is alive and with Willow, both witches are living with Buffy. Also, Xander and Anya are married and Anya is pregnant.
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FAMILY
Chapter 16: Dread
The doorbell rang, startling the already on-edge Slayer. She clicked off the Sunday morning cartoons that she had been watching so that she could answer the door. She limped to the door sluggishly, the lack of sleep catching up with her. She twisted the knob slowly and pulled open the front door.
On the other side of the threshold stood Dave. He held out a bouquet of flowers to his girlfriend and smiled. "Happy Valentine's Day."
Dawn took the flowers, ran her fingers over the buds for a moment before dropping them absently and wrapping her arms around Dave's neck. He was more than happy to reciprocate the embrace as he held onto Dawn. A burning sensation began in his throat and rose up to his eyes. It pained him more to see Dawn so hurt than to feel pain himself. He ran his fingers in smooth circles around the small of her back and he could hear her breathing... music to his ears.
Dawn released her boyfriend and took his hand, picking up the fallen flowers with the other. She led him to the living room couch and sat heavily upon it, her ankle throbbing. Dave sat next to her silently but rubbed his thumb over her fingers.
"I guess out first Valentine's Day together didn't really turn out the way you planned, huh?" Dawn asked with a half laugh that came out as a half sob.
David gently ran his fingers over a part of her face that wasn't bruised. "Don't worry about it. I'm just glad that you're alright."
Dawn smiled at him, his mere presence already comforting her. "Thanks."
"How's Buffy?"
"Physically? Fine. Emotionally..."
"Oh," Dave responded quietly. "Ouch."
"Yeah. She's really upset."
"Do you know when she's coming home from the hospital?"
"Not yet. A few days, I think. Spike's staying with her. He's pretty messed up about this too."
"I guess you can't blame him."
"I guess not."
"But the baby... she's-"
"Supposedly she's going to be fine. Then again, she has another like, four and a half months so..."
"Not that you're being pessimistic or anything."
"Well what does optimism really accomplish besides setting high hopes and false dreams?"
"All right then! Pessimism it is!" Dave said with sarcastic enthusiasm.
"Sorry," Dawn told him sadly, looking at the floor. "Comes with the Slayer territory."
Dave looked at Dawn for a long silent moment. "Can I kiss you?"
The young Slayer looked up. "What?"
"You're all sad, and it's really making me want to kiss you."
Dawn put her hand on the back of David's neck and pulled his face close so that his lips could press gently against hers. He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her closer to him. Careful so as not to irritate the large gash on Dawn's forehead, he removed his lips from hers and pressed them gently against her soft, warm skin.
Oh yeah... this was love.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Spike sat patiently in the uncomfortable hospital chair that a doctor had brought him last night. It didn't matter to him, though. He was too wrapped up in the sound of Buffy's labored breathing to care about his own comfort. She would moan on and off throughout the night, and it drove Spike insane. It wasn't the noise that bothered him; he had dealt with worse. Seeing Buffy in such discomfort upset him greatly and he had hoped sleep would bring some relief. It brought none.
Buffy stirred awake, opening her eyes slowly as if the few small streams of light alone coming through the cracks in the blinds burned them. She winced and shut her eyes tightly. Slowly and more carefully this time, she blinked them open until they adjusted to even the meager amounts of light in the room.
Spike leaned in more from where he sat and rubbed his fingers up and down Buffy's arm. "Hey."
Buffy smiled weakly at him and shifted so that she was in a more comfortable position. "What time is it?"
"A little after seven, love. You should back to sleep. Rest up, let that Slayer healing strength do what it's there for."
"I can't," Buffy said so faintly that if Spike didn't have vampire hearing he might not have heard it. "I mean, I just don't want-"
"It's okay," he told her gently, taking her hand and rubbing her wrist with his thumb. "You don't have to."
"I know... I just, I didn't sleep all that easy."
"I could tell," he told his love as he raised her palm to his lips so that he could give her a gentle kiss, "what were you dreaming?"
"So much," Buffy choked, as fresh tears formed and rose to the brim, "mostly about her. A lot about you... some about, just the whole situation."
"Right, the vampire and the Slayer raising a child."
"Should we?"
"Should we what?"
"Raise her. Keep her I mean."
Spike laughed as if what Buffy had said was some sort of sick joke. "Of course. We're her parents aren't we?"
"Would that be best for her? I mean, wouldn't it be safest if she was with someone whose birthright wasn't to save the world for otherworldly nasties? Wouldn't she be safer somewhere else... with someone else?"
"Are you implying that..."
"Maybe adoption would be the best thing we can do for her."
"You're wrong," Spike said, sternly with his tone border-lining on angry.
"Am I?"
"Absolutely. Buffy, say she lives in the middle of nowhere with two very loving parents... still knowing that they aren't really hers. She'll have questions, about her origins, maybe questions about inexplicable super strength that they won't be able to answer. What if she looks for us and finds us, huh? What if she does find out what she is and where she's from? Would she be able to handle that after living in an ideal world made of peaches and bunnies all her life? It would better for her to be raised by us. We're her parents, we will love her and protect from whatever may come."
"At least in that scenario, she grew up. She had a childhood," tears began to slip down Buffy's flushed cheeks, "she had a life."
"She can have that with us, love. She can if you don't give up on her before she's even born!"
"I'm so scared Spike, I try... so hard not to be, but it's not my life anymore. Do you understand that? Can you? It's hers. She's part of me, living off my body. I need to stay alive for her for the next five months, and then I need to keep her alive. I want to shelter her from all that is bad and scary, I wish I didn't have to in the first place! Do you have any idea how terrifying that is for me?"
"No," Spike said honestly, because he knew that truly he couldn't understand how that felt. "But I do know what is like to live off another life, or to have a new life come from my own."
"Feeding? Turning? It doesn't even come close to what this is like?"
"Doesn't it?"
"How dare you compare pregnancy and birth to death and heartless killing?"
"They're not so different. You should know..."
"Don't bring that-"
"You KNOW what it feels like, Buffy, to have another life depending on yours. You've felt that before. When Angel-"
"Please, stop."
"When Angel drank from you, he was taking your life for his own. That's all you know of this so I get the terror. You've shared blood with another being before but it was frightening and painful. This doesn't have to be. This is beautiful."
Buffy smiled weakly at him and nodded. "Good guess."
"What?" Spike asked, not understanding at all what she was implying.
"It's a good guess... about the fear, about Angel. I must admit, it did strike a nerve, but that's not why I would rather she go. It's because I'm selfish."
"How do you mean?"
"I don't want to die before I see her grow up. I don't want to have to leave her behind."
"Oh, I thought-"
"No," Buffy shook her head softly. "I would rather lose her sooner. I don't want to die leaving her behind."
"Then you won't."
"I can't control when I die. Every Slayer has a death wish, right?"
"But you, Buffy," Spike said gently, taking her shivering hands in his own, "you have ties to the world. Another bond will only make it stronger."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Dawn snuggled up against Tara who had brought the Slayer her most recent dose of painkillers. Every time she would take the aspirin, it reminded her of how she had never been hurt this badly before. Never since she had become the Slayer, or even since before that she had never taken a beating like this.
The good witch ran her finger's through Dawn's long, smooth, brown locks and kissed her on the top of her head. The teen's focus was obviously not on the cartoons they were watching, her eyes were fixed downward on a random spot on the floor. Tara could tell from the pained expression on Dawn's face that her thoughts were of the not-so-good occurrences that had taken place last night. She decided the best thing to do for the time being would be to distract her with the happier thoughts of this afternoon.
"So, did you have a nice time with Dave?"
Dawn came out of her daze and craned her neck a bit so the she could look at Tara. She smiled slightly and nodded. "Always do."
"That's good. What did you guys do?"
"We watched movies. And talked. It was nice... the talking I mean."
"So it sounds like you had a good belated Valentine's Day," Tara shrugged and smiled.
"Yeah. And the best part, he didn't even care. I mean, he cared, but he was more worried about me. He's sweet like that. I mean, he's amazing like that."
"I'm glad you found someone that fits with you. He's so understanding of... everything. I'm glad he makes you happy."
Dawn nodded. "Yeah," she laughed quietly, "me too."
The doorbell rang and Dawn shifted slightly so that Tara could get up to answer it. She walked to the door and pulled it open to see Spike standing there. His face was worn and dark circles were present under his usually lively blue eyes. His tired expression mirrored Dawn's so.
"You ring the bell now?" Tara asked lightly as she stepped aside to let him in.
"Didn't have my keys with me and the door was locked... for once," he added, and Tara couldn't tell if he was joking or not. What she could tell was that he was stressed, and tired, and obviously very upset over the whole ordeal. None of these things surprised her, obviously, she could have guessed that he would feel and look like this even before she saw him.
"I didn't expect you to be home for a while," Tara told him, placing a comforting hand on his elbow. He shrugged.
"Neither did I. But Hank's at the hospital with Buffy and she said that I should get home, get something to eat. Figured she was right, it didn't hurt to get the air. Had some time to clear my head too on the walk home."
"That's good," she said compassionately. "I'm glad to see you're still together. Not so much in pieces like everyone else."
"Appears that way, dunnit?" He asked sarcastically. Tara pulled back a little, and Spike realized how unintentionally harsh his voice was. "Sorry," he told her more gently this time, "just a bit edgy is all."
Tara shook her head and smiled sympathetically. "You don't have to explain yourself to me."
Spike nodded and looked at the stairs. "Is Dawn-"
"On the couch," Tara told him with a wave of her hand toward the living room.
"Thanks. Is Willow here?"
"No, she and Xander left on patrol a while ago. So did Dave, not on patrol though... obviously. He was here with Dawn for a couple of hours. He's such a sweetie."
"Yeah," Spike agreed absently as he began to head toward Dawn, "he's a good kid."
Dawn turned at the sound of Spike's Doc Martens striding across the living room floor. She smiled weakly. "Hi."
Spike lowered himself onto his knees, allowing Dawn to put her arms around his neck. Dawn-patrol time, he thought. He had been on Buffy-watch all day, and now it was time to give to youngest Summers her fair share of his energy. Spike wrapped his muscular arms around Dawn's petite waist and gave her a gently squeeze. He soon felt salty tears falling onto his neck and pulled back slightly so that he could softly wipe the tears from her cheeks.
"What's this now?"
"Sorry," Dawn told him with a complete lack of energy, "just a lot of pent up... I'm just upset and... how's Buffy?"
"She's doing alright. But I've attended to Buffy all day, sweet bit, can I ask about you? How are you doing in there?" He asked, tapping a finger lightly on her temple.
"Not so of the good," she told him honestly, a fresh batch of tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "I hurt in places I didn't even think I could. My sister's in the hospital... and I wonder... whatever... never mind..." Dawn trailed off, choosing not to complete her statement.
"Wonder what, Nibblet?"
"It's nothing..."
"Dawn?"
"It's just... I'm not sure how smart it was... for the Powers That Be to choose me. I mean, yeah I've got Buffy's blood and all, but, this isn't my thing."
"What do you mean 'this isn't your thing'?" Spike asked, a bit shocked by Dawn's confession.
"I just... I'm just not very good at all of this. The slayage and stuff."
"Dawnie, how can you say that? You are amazing."
"I can't even stop my sister from being hurt," Dawn choked the words as she began to sob for the millionth time since last night, "how am I supposed to protect the world?"
"Sweetheart, I thought we went over this? What happened last night wasn't your fault. Please believe me when I tell you this."
"It's just so hard," Dawn continued to gasp violent sobs that shook her whole body. Spike took her back into his arms and tried to sooth the teen. Tara watched with sympathy and sadness, wishing that there was something, ANYTHING she could do for the girl. But she knew better, there was no miracle cure for Dawn's despair. Unless...
"Sleep," Tara said out loud, very unintentionally.
Spike and Dawn looked up at Tara who was walking toward them. Dawn wiped the tears from her face and sniffled a bit before asking, "what?"
"Sweetie, when was the last time you got some sleep? You've been up since you got home last night," Tara said gently as she pushed a few strands of hair behind Dawn's ear. "Look at you, you're falling apart."
"I think she may already be apart," Spike told Tara with a smile playing on the edges of his mouth. He looked at Dawn and spoke to her as tenderly as he could. "Glinda's right, pet, you ought to get some rest."
Dawn nodded understandingly. She was out of it, but not completely irrational. She still knew that her body was screaming for her to sleep.
"Okay."
She stood shakily. Her twisted ankle throbbing under her weight. She attempted to take a step toward the stairs but moaned painfully. Slayer healing never seemed to kick in quite fast enough. Before she knew what had happened, Spike swept her off her feet and was carrying her to her room. She lay her head on his shoulder and shut her eyes. Tara followed closely behind and saw that Dawn had almost completely drifted off to sleep when Spike placed her in her bed. The witch pulled the covers over the sleep-deprived girl and placed a gentle goodnight kiss on her forehead. Spike did the same, ran his fingers one last time though her hair, and exited her room with Tara by his side.
They walked quietly to the kitchen where Spike pulled out a bag of blood, ripped it open and drank it right from the package without even bothering to heat it up. The smooth liquid passed wonderfully over his tongue and down his throat. When he finished the bag he tossed in the garbage and looked at Tara who was smiling widely.
"What?" He asked, a little unnerved by her strange demeanor.
"You are going to be an amazing father, do you know that?"
Spike looked down and was sure that he would be blushing if he could. He smiled, choked a short laugh, and looked back up at the smiling witch.
"You too... I mean, you'll make a great mum. You're practically mum to everyone in our little gang already..."
Tara sarcastically patted her fist to her chest and made a mock-serious face. "It comes from inside."
Spike, though he felt like he shouldn't, laughed out loud at Tara's ridiculous comment. He stopped himself quickly, feeling the guilt of it rising in his throat.
"It's okay," Tara said with a smile grin. "No one died, no one is going to, you're allowed to laugh. I feel completely ridiculous and cliché saying this but I'm telling you, you're not wrong."
Spike nodded and took in what she was saying. "Still, I better get back to the hospital. Buffy-"
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure!" Spike answered, a bit insulted by what he thought was an accusation.
"Oh no! I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that, you seem pretty wiped too. I just thought that you might want to get some rest before you go. It's only" Tara looked at the clock "nine-thirty. Get a few hours of sleep before you head back. A cranky Spike in a not-so-helpful Spike."
Spike grumbled a bit self-consciously. "Mother knows best."
TBC...
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Okay, midterms week has arrived. Might not be a while until I update next. PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!
Summary: Spike and Buffy are going to have a baby together!!! I know, I know, it's been done about a million times but I promise that this one is different. Anyway, it also deals with all different types of families that could exist in the Buffyverse.
Spoilers: None really
Continuity: It's the sequel to "Apocalypse now... Again". However, you don't really need to read it to understand this fic. It picks up a few weeks after where "Apocalypse Now... Again" leaves off. Also, I just thought I'd point out that Tara is alive and with Willow, both witches are living with Buffy. Also, Xander and Anya are married and Anya is pregnant.
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FAMILY
Chapter 16: Dread
The doorbell rang, startling the already on-edge Slayer. She clicked off the Sunday morning cartoons that she had been watching so that she could answer the door. She limped to the door sluggishly, the lack of sleep catching up with her. She twisted the knob slowly and pulled open the front door.
On the other side of the threshold stood Dave. He held out a bouquet of flowers to his girlfriend and smiled. "Happy Valentine's Day."
Dawn took the flowers, ran her fingers over the buds for a moment before dropping them absently and wrapping her arms around Dave's neck. He was more than happy to reciprocate the embrace as he held onto Dawn. A burning sensation began in his throat and rose up to his eyes. It pained him more to see Dawn so hurt than to feel pain himself. He ran his fingers in smooth circles around the small of her back and he could hear her breathing... music to his ears.
Dawn released her boyfriend and took his hand, picking up the fallen flowers with the other. She led him to the living room couch and sat heavily upon it, her ankle throbbing. Dave sat next to her silently but rubbed his thumb over her fingers.
"I guess out first Valentine's Day together didn't really turn out the way you planned, huh?" Dawn asked with a half laugh that came out as a half sob.
David gently ran his fingers over a part of her face that wasn't bruised. "Don't worry about it. I'm just glad that you're alright."
Dawn smiled at him, his mere presence already comforting her. "Thanks."
"How's Buffy?"
"Physically? Fine. Emotionally..."
"Oh," Dave responded quietly. "Ouch."
"Yeah. She's really upset."
"Do you know when she's coming home from the hospital?"
"Not yet. A few days, I think. Spike's staying with her. He's pretty messed up about this too."
"I guess you can't blame him."
"I guess not."
"But the baby... she's-"
"Supposedly she's going to be fine. Then again, she has another like, four and a half months so..."
"Not that you're being pessimistic or anything."
"Well what does optimism really accomplish besides setting high hopes and false dreams?"
"All right then! Pessimism it is!" Dave said with sarcastic enthusiasm.
"Sorry," Dawn told him sadly, looking at the floor. "Comes with the Slayer territory."
Dave looked at Dawn for a long silent moment. "Can I kiss you?"
The young Slayer looked up. "What?"
"You're all sad, and it's really making me want to kiss you."
Dawn put her hand on the back of David's neck and pulled his face close so that his lips could press gently against hers. He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her closer to him. Careful so as not to irritate the large gash on Dawn's forehead, he removed his lips from hers and pressed them gently against her soft, warm skin.
Oh yeah... this was love.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Spike sat patiently in the uncomfortable hospital chair that a doctor had brought him last night. It didn't matter to him, though. He was too wrapped up in the sound of Buffy's labored breathing to care about his own comfort. She would moan on and off throughout the night, and it drove Spike insane. It wasn't the noise that bothered him; he had dealt with worse. Seeing Buffy in such discomfort upset him greatly and he had hoped sleep would bring some relief. It brought none.
Buffy stirred awake, opening her eyes slowly as if the few small streams of light alone coming through the cracks in the blinds burned them. She winced and shut her eyes tightly. Slowly and more carefully this time, she blinked them open until they adjusted to even the meager amounts of light in the room.
Spike leaned in more from where he sat and rubbed his fingers up and down Buffy's arm. "Hey."
Buffy smiled weakly at him and shifted so that she was in a more comfortable position. "What time is it?"
"A little after seven, love. You should back to sleep. Rest up, let that Slayer healing strength do what it's there for."
"I can't," Buffy said so faintly that if Spike didn't have vampire hearing he might not have heard it. "I mean, I just don't want-"
"It's okay," he told her gently, taking her hand and rubbing her wrist with his thumb. "You don't have to."
"I know... I just, I didn't sleep all that easy."
"I could tell," he told his love as he raised her palm to his lips so that he could give her a gentle kiss, "what were you dreaming?"
"So much," Buffy choked, as fresh tears formed and rose to the brim, "mostly about her. A lot about you... some about, just the whole situation."
"Right, the vampire and the Slayer raising a child."
"Should we?"
"Should we what?"
"Raise her. Keep her I mean."
Spike laughed as if what Buffy had said was some sort of sick joke. "Of course. We're her parents aren't we?"
"Would that be best for her? I mean, wouldn't it be safest if she was with someone whose birthright wasn't to save the world for otherworldly nasties? Wouldn't she be safer somewhere else... with someone else?"
"Are you implying that..."
"Maybe adoption would be the best thing we can do for her."
"You're wrong," Spike said, sternly with his tone border-lining on angry.
"Am I?"
"Absolutely. Buffy, say she lives in the middle of nowhere with two very loving parents... still knowing that they aren't really hers. She'll have questions, about her origins, maybe questions about inexplicable super strength that they won't be able to answer. What if she looks for us and finds us, huh? What if she does find out what she is and where she's from? Would she be able to handle that after living in an ideal world made of peaches and bunnies all her life? It would better for her to be raised by us. We're her parents, we will love her and protect from whatever may come."
"At least in that scenario, she grew up. She had a childhood," tears began to slip down Buffy's flushed cheeks, "she had a life."
"She can have that with us, love. She can if you don't give up on her before she's even born!"
"I'm so scared Spike, I try... so hard not to be, but it's not my life anymore. Do you understand that? Can you? It's hers. She's part of me, living off my body. I need to stay alive for her for the next five months, and then I need to keep her alive. I want to shelter her from all that is bad and scary, I wish I didn't have to in the first place! Do you have any idea how terrifying that is for me?"
"No," Spike said honestly, because he knew that truly he couldn't understand how that felt. "But I do know what is like to live off another life, or to have a new life come from my own."
"Feeding? Turning? It doesn't even come close to what this is like?"
"Doesn't it?"
"How dare you compare pregnancy and birth to death and heartless killing?"
"They're not so different. You should know..."
"Don't bring that-"
"You KNOW what it feels like, Buffy, to have another life depending on yours. You've felt that before. When Angel-"
"Please, stop."
"When Angel drank from you, he was taking your life for his own. That's all you know of this so I get the terror. You've shared blood with another being before but it was frightening and painful. This doesn't have to be. This is beautiful."
Buffy smiled weakly at him and nodded. "Good guess."
"What?" Spike asked, not understanding at all what she was implying.
"It's a good guess... about the fear, about Angel. I must admit, it did strike a nerve, but that's not why I would rather she go. It's because I'm selfish."
"How do you mean?"
"I don't want to die before I see her grow up. I don't want to have to leave her behind."
"Oh, I thought-"
"No," Buffy shook her head softly. "I would rather lose her sooner. I don't want to die leaving her behind."
"Then you won't."
"I can't control when I die. Every Slayer has a death wish, right?"
"But you, Buffy," Spike said gently, taking her shivering hands in his own, "you have ties to the world. Another bond will only make it stronger."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Dawn snuggled up against Tara who had brought the Slayer her most recent dose of painkillers. Every time she would take the aspirin, it reminded her of how she had never been hurt this badly before. Never since she had become the Slayer, or even since before that she had never taken a beating like this.
The good witch ran her finger's through Dawn's long, smooth, brown locks and kissed her on the top of her head. The teen's focus was obviously not on the cartoons they were watching, her eyes were fixed downward on a random spot on the floor. Tara could tell from the pained expression on Dawn's face that her thoughts were of the not-so-good occurrences that had taken place last night. She decided the best thing to do for the time being would be to distract her with the happier thoughts of this afternoon.
"So, did you have a nice time with Dave?"
Dawn came out of her daze and craned her neck a bit so the she could look at Tara. She smiled slightly and nodded. "Always do."
"That's good. What did you guys do?"
"We watched movies. And talked. It was nice... the talking I mean."
"So it sounds like you had a good belated Valentine's Day," Tara shrugged and smiled.
"Yeah. And the best part, he didn't even care. I mean, he cared, but he was more worried about me. He's sweet like that. I mean, he's amazing like that."
"I'm glad you found someone that fits with you. He's so understanding of... everything. I'm glad he makes you happy."
Dawn nodded. "Yeah," she laughed quietly, "me too."
The doorbell rang and Dawn shifted slightly so that Tara could get up to answer it. She walked to the door and pulled it open to see Spike standing there. His face was worn and dark circles were present under his usually lively blue eyes. His tired expression mirrored Dawn's so.
"You ring the bell now?" Tara asked lightly as she stepped aside to let him in.
"Didn't have my keys with me and the door was locked... for once," he added, and Tara couldn't tell if he was joking or not. What she could tell was that he was stressed, and tired, and obviously very upset over the whole ordeal. None of these things surprised her, obviously, she could have guessed that he would feel and look like this even before she saw him.
"I didn't expect you to be home for a while," Tara told him, placing a comforting hand on his elbow. He shrugged.
"Neither did I. But Hank's at the hospital with Buffy and she said that I should get home, get something to eat. Figured she was right, it didn't hurt to get the air. Had some time to clear my head too on the walk home."
"That's good," she said compassionately. "I'm glad to see you're still together. Not so much in pieces like everyone else."
"Appears that way, dunnit?" He asked sarcastically. Tara pulled back a little, and Spike realized how unintentionally harsh his voice was. "Sorry," he told her more gently this time, "just a bit edgy is all."
Tara shook her head and smiled sympathetically. "You don't have to explain yourself to me."
Spike nodded and looked at the stairs. "Is Dawn-"
"On the couch," Tara told him with a wave of her hand toward the living room.
"Thanks. Is Willow here?"
"No, she and Xander left on patrol a while ago. So did Dave, not on patrol though... obviously. He was here with Dawn for a couple of hours. He's such a sweetie."
"Yeah," Spike agreed absently as he began to head toward Dawn, "he's a good kid."
Dawn turned at the sound of Spike's Doc Martens striding across the living room floor. She smiled weakly. "Hi."
Spike lowered himself onto his knees, allowing Dawn to put her arms around his neck. Dawn-patrol time, he thought. He had been on Buffy-watch all day, and now it was time to give to youngest Summers her fair share of his energy. Spike wrapped his muscular arms around Dawn's petite waist and gave her a gently squeeze. He soon felt salty tears falling onto his neck and pulled back slightly so that he could softly wipe the tears from her cheeks.
"What's this now?"
"Sorry," Dawn told him with a complete lack of energy, "just a lot of pent up... I'm just upset and... how's Buffy?"
"She's doing alright. But I've attended to Buffy all day, sweet bit, can I ask about you? How are you doing in there?" He asked, tapping a finger lightly on her temple.
"Not so of the good," she told him honestly, a fresh batch of tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "I hurt in places I didn't even think I could. My sister's in the hospital... and I wonder... whatever... never mind..." Dawn trailed off, choosing not to complete her statement.
"Wonder what, Nibblet?"
"It's nothing..."
"Dawn?"
"It's just... I'm not sure how smart it was... for the Powers That Be to choose me. I mean, yeah I've got Buffy's blood and all, but, this isn't my thing."
"What do you mean 'this isn't your thing'?" Spike asked, a bit shocked by Dawn's confession.
"I just... I'm just not very good at all of this. The slayage and stuff."
"Dawnie, how can you say that? You are amazing."
"I can't even stop my sister from being hurt," Dawn choked the words as she began to sob for the millionth time since last night, "how am I supposed to protect the world?"
"Sweetheart, I thought we went over this? What happened last night wasn't your fault. Please believe me when I tell you this."
"It's just so hard," Dawn continued to gasp violent sobs that shook her whole body. Spike took her back into his arms and tried to sooth the teen. Tara watched with sympathy and sadness, wishing that there was something, ANYTHING she could do for the girl. But she knew better, there was no miracle cure for Dawn's despair. Unless...
"Sleep," Tara said out loud, very unintentionally.
Spike and Dawn looked up at Tara who was walking toward them. Dawn wiped the tears from her face and sniffled a bit before asking, "what?"
"Sweetie, when was the last time you got some sleep? You've been up since you got home last night," Tara said gently as she pushed a few strands of hair behind Dawn's ear. "Look at you, you're falling apart."
"I think she may already be apart," Spike told Tara with a smile playing on the edges of his mouth. He looked at Dawn and spoke to her as tenderly as he could. "Glinda's right, pet, you ought to get some rest."
Dawn nodded understandingly. She was out of it, but not completely irrational. She still knew that her body was screaming for her to sleep.
"Okay."
She stood shakily. Her twisted ankle throbbing under her weight. She attempted to take a step toward the stairs but moaned painfully. Slayer healing never seemed to kick in quite fast enough. Before she knew what had happened, Spike swept her off her feet and was carrying her to her room. She lay her head on his shoulder and shut her eyes. Tara followed closely behind and saw that Dawn had almost completely drifted off to sleep when Spike placed her in her bed. The witch pulled the covers over the sleep-deprived girl and placed a gentle goodnight kiss on her forehead. Spike did the same, ran his fingers one last time though her hair, and exited her room with Tara by his side.
They walked quietly to the kitchen where Spike pulled out a bag of blood, ripped it open and drank it right from the package without even bothering to heat it up. The smooth liquid passed wonderfully over his tongue and down his throat. When he finished the bag he tossed in the garbage and looked at Tara who was smiling widely.
"What?" He asked, a little unnerved by her strange demeanor.
"You are going to be an amazing father, do you know that?"
Spike looked down and was sure that he would be blushing if he could. He smiled, choked a short laugh, and looked back up at the smiling witch.
"You too... I mean, you'll make a great mum. You're practically mum to everyone in our little gang already..."
Tara sarcastically patted her fist to her chest and made a mock-serious face. "It comes from inside."
Spike, though he felt like he shouldn't, laughed out loud at Tara's ridiculous comment. He stopped himself quickly, feeling the guilt of it rising in his throat.
"It's okay," Tara said with a smile grin. "No one died, no one is going to, you're allowed to laugh. I feel completely ridiculous and cliché saying this but I'm telling you, you're not wrong."
Spike nodded and took in what she was saying. "Still, I better get back to the hospital. Buffy-"
"Are you sure?"
"Of course I'm sure!" Spike answered, a bit insulted by what he thought was an accusation.
"Oh no! I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that, you seem pretty wiped too. I just thought that you might want to get some rest before you go. It's only" Tara looked at the clock "nine-thirty. Get a few hours of sleep before you head back. A cranky Spike in a not-so-helpful Spike."
Spike grumbled a bit self-consciously. "Mother knows best."
TBC...
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Okay, midterms week has arrived. Might not be a while until I update next. PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!