To Lose Trust

Chapter Two:

Questions without Answers

" Shin's in the ICU." Touma repeated barely containing his tears.

" What happened?" Seiji asked feeling suddenly numb.

Touma broke, the maelstrom of emotion he had been hiding reared its ugly face," He said he wanted to die. There was so much blood. Seiji, what if I hadn't forgotten my wallet? What if we hadn't gone home? I can't lose him too." Tears ran diamond trails down pale skin.

Seiji tried to comfort his friend, though he refused to use meaning platitudes. He was so busy that he missed the slip, something that never would have gotten by the bearer of Suiko.

" Touma, you have to calm down a little." murmured Seiji," I don't want you passing out on us. I'll heal Shin and well figure out what's going on."

" What if he won't let you?" sniffled Touma.

" I'll set Nasuti on him. You know how he's been lately." grinned Seiji.

" How much longer does she have?" asked Touma.

" Five weeks."

" That long!" exclaimed Touma," She looks ready to burst."

" Not funny Touma!" pouted Nasuti," Where's Shin, and what has happened?"

The two young warriors sobered quickly," He's in the ICU."

" What..." tears began running down her rosy cheeks.

" We don't know details yet." answered Seiji moving to comfort his young wife.

" When will we know?" she asked not trying to stop her tears.

" Dr. Okawa will..."

" Touma," said the tall nurse interrupting the blue haired warrior," Dr. Okawa said to have you wait in the private waiting are around the corner. He'll be around shortly. I'll send your friends as they come."

" Thank you Akaino." answered Touma softly.

" Oh, Touma, when your strong friend gets here, there's a recliner in the staff lounge that you can move for Nasuti."

It was Seiji's relieved thank you that replied but it didn't matter to Akaino, They were all good people. They didn't wait for Shuu either. Together, Touma and Seiji easily moved the more comfortable seat. They were just getting Nasuti settled when Shuu and Ryo joined them followed by a grim Dr. Okawa.

Dr. Okawa was a young doctor, though he had the body of a man who spent as many hours in the dojo as he did in the ER. He had a long dark braid that seemed quite odd in the hospital but fit him perfectly. His eyes, dark like rich freshly turned soil, sparkled with a deeper more mysterious knowledge. As he entered, those dark eyes took in the room as if judging weather they would be able to handle the news he brought. Grim was not a good look for those eyes.

" Since you're all here, I'll give you the news." a deep breath, a sigh," The wounds were all self inflicted. The bruises, I'm not sure about and he's in no state to tell us. He has lost a lot of blood." A deep breath and planting of his feet as though to stabilize himself," Shin had a bad reaction to something we gave him, that's what put him in the ICU. He will be fine. He's young and strong, it didn't do any serious damage. He should be out of the ICU late tonight or early tomorrow. If I know your group though he may be out of here day after tomorrow."

" Can we see him?" asked Nasuti.

" Yes. I should warn you, he's on a respirator to ease his breathing. Also, he was wearing a lot of long sleeves I would assume." He waited for confirming nods," Many cuts are visible. Many scars as well.

" Listen, I know you each have a pocket full of secrets but I've had two of you under my care now. The first one was one too many!" he sighed and the anger drained from his face," You are friends. No, more like brothers. Maybe it's time to share those secrets before they destroy you."

Heads hung, eyes searching for a safe place to rest. It was an accusation that no one could deny. Did they want to deny it? Yes. Within the embrace of denial there was a safety that they knew. To deny those things that were too hard to face -- even harder than facing the dynasty -- was to set themselves on a downward spiral that was difficult to reverse. Silence hung in the air like a heavy fog that no one had the nerve to walk through. Touma, after an internal battle hidden behind a mask, shattered it like glass.

" It sounds so easy." he ran a long fingered hand through his hair," To break the silence that has been kept for years and years, it's as easy as tearing off your own arm. It is destroying us slowly, eating its way from the inside out but it is hard to break the silence that has protected us. Maybe you're right, maybe it's time to break the silence and maybe it will destroy us that much faster. You are right, we are like brothers. We've become the family that we lacked."

" Touma," said Nasuti so softly that he almost didn't hear her," Let's go see Shin."

Dr. Okawa nodded silently. He knew the length at which Touma had kept his secret. His predecessor told him, passed the knowledge down from one doctor to the next so that there would always be someone to go to when things were bad. Someone who would understand if the worst came to pass. It did. In the daunting months after retirement, he saw the best of her faces and the worst. Neither were pretty. If he were honest, they scared the shit out of him.

The small group followed in the silence of deep thought. The doctor led them through a maze of bleached out halls that smelled not of life but of death clinging, if only barely, to life. If anyone thought about where they were going they would have been terrified. Shin, strong and unwavering in ways they didn't understand, was their rock. They always went to him when they needed help and suddenly that stabilizing force was in need of shoring up.

As they approached the door to Shin's room Dr. Okawa turned to them," I'll be back in a few moments, I'm going to set up for you to stay in the waiting room around the corner."

" Thank you." replied Nasuti softly.

They watched in silence as he left before entering the room. The sight shocked them. Shin looked small, smaller than they had ever seen him. The bed with its wires and tubes seemed to swallow him whole. More shocking than the loss of weight were the angry red cuts accented by pink scars.

Nasuti, hand pressed against paling lips, sobbed softly," How did we not see this?"

" I don't know." answered Seiji moving up to place trembling hands on Shin's forehead. He closed his eyes and let himself be pulled into Shin's mind.

Seiji found himself sitting on a beach, the sun setting in vibrant reds and oranges. A little ways away Shin sat on a rock dangling his feet into the water. Seiji studied the older boy carefully from a distance. Shin wasn't the same. His long muscular arms wrapped around himself as though warding off some chill that Seiji didn't feel.

" Are you hear to heal me?" asked Shin.

" Yes." replied Seiji's worried voice," I wanted to talk to you first."

" I don't want to talk." Shin appeared next to Seiji.

" I think we need to talk." Said Seiji reaching out towards the auburn crowned man.

Shin jumped back as though afraid to be touched," I said No!"

The scene changed around Seiji in the blink of an eye. The beautiful beach replaced by a raging sea and dark swirling clouds. At first glance Shin appeared to be gone but Seiji found him sitting in a small boat in the growing waves. Shin was in his element but Seiji knew he had to try and reach his friend. With a thought Seiji put himself in the boat across from Shin.

" You don't take a hint do you."

Seiji started to reach for Shin but thought better about it." Something is wrong and I... We're worried."

" I said I don't want to talk. Go away Seiji."

" Shin..."

" GO AWAY!"

It was a mental slap that sent Seiji dizzily out of his mind and back to the real world where their friends waited with worried looks.

" He doesn't want to talk right now but he didn't say I couldn't heal him." Seiji said massaging his temple," He did, on the other hand, make it quite clear that he didn't want to talk."

" Will you heal him now or wait?" asked Ryo.

" I'll do it now. I should be fine as long as he doesn't get me with another mental slap like that." replied Seiji before placing his hands back on Shin. A green glow slowly engulfed the two of them.

" What in the hell is going on in here?" exclaimed Dr. Okawa walking in.

Touma turned, blue eyes wide with surprise," Dr. Okawa!"

" Please, come in and shut the door." sighed Ryo wondering if the day could get any worse.

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Authors Note: Hi! Well, here's chapter two. Before you start ranting let me do some explaining. First of all, there will be a lot of places where people are out of character. This will get better, just understand stress does things that make people act out of character. Second, as much as I love the SeijixTouma pairing, I have other things in mind. I think that is everything. Chapter three should be coming soon.

(Almost forgot) Disclaimer- I don't own RW/YST nor do I claim to.