Disclaimer: I checked my pockets. No Rurouni Kenshin patent. Sorry, don't own 'em.
Note: This chapter is dedicated to Sunny and Fujifunmum, my rare and wonderful beta-readers.
Chapter Nineteen
There are only so many ways to describe a bad situation and quite frankly this authoress feels she has used up most of them. Well, either that or she simply cannot think of a humorous way to state it. But remembering that comedy is sometimes at its best when in the form of simplicity, she decided to do just that. So listen up people.
Kenshin. Kimono. Umbrella. Climax.
I trust you all to know how this is bad.
…
No, that was not an indication of this being a lemon chapter! Go read the previous sections if you're still confused, Hentai! Yeesh, where's a scene change when you need one?
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"It's not going well is it?" Futashi asked the graying samurai standing next to him.
Obaga, his attention torn between the developing events and his lingering injuries, answered gravely but honestly, "These things are usually very difficult de gozaru. Moments like this can be full of agony and a pain that comes from within as well as from without."
The young boy cringed when a cry of said pain filled the air. "It sounds awful," he said with worry.
The elder nodded. "It probably looks awful too. Can you imagine what it must be like? I mean, having it stick out your--"
"Ew! I didn't need that mental image, Old Man!"
"Well I was just saying…"
"Well don't say anymore! I mean, jeez, that's my sister!"
"Birth is still a wonderful experience and miracle of life," Obaga said sagely, crossing his arms to add to his wizened effect. It was working well enough until a pillow flew out the door—-correction, through the door-- and knocked him upside the head. This might not've been so bad if it hadn't been one of those wooden ones.
"Miracle of life my aaaAAAAAAHHH!!!"
"Nikko-chan, stop getting distracted and concentrate on your breathing! You'll never push effectively if you're out of breath."
Futashi cast a wary glance at the closed ricepaper door behind him that now sported a small hole. Thankfully he was not at an angle to see in. Shaking his head he turned to the samurai next to him.
"I think her lungs are working just fine. Not mention her ears, right Old Man?"
"Ororororororo…" the other replied.
Both were now standing in front of the small house in the middle of the small clearing, having retreated there to ensure no unwelcome approaches were made on it. Especially not when the battle between Himura and Aroji made such a convenient distraction.
Speaking of the battle, Futashi couldn't say that it was going badly. However, he also couldn't say it was going very well. While Himura himself remained untouched by Aroji's attacks, there were several close calls evident. The sleeves of the once elegant kimono Himura wore now hung in shreds, along with some of the lower hem. It was clear the former assassin was still having difficulty maneuvering in what was left of the folds of expensive material, as well as counter-attacking with such a feeble weapon as the umbrella.
On the other hand, Aroji wasn't exactly winning either. Himura had managed to use his speed and duck in several times already, giving the man some shots with his fists, elbows, and feet. Unfortunately, Aroji was much heavier than Himura, and his extra weight absorbed most of the impact so the assaults had little effect. Aroji's sword and skill were also enough to keep the smaller man at a distance, not allowing any time for more damaging techniques.
It was a close match, even if only due to circumstances that left Himura handicapped. Futashi felt confident that if the red haired young man only had a sword this confrontation would meet a swift end. But Himura's blade was still tucked securely into Aroji's belt, and Aroji was taking extra precaution to make sure it wasn't stolen away.
"This doesn't seem to be going well either," he mumbled. Turning back to the samurai he asked, "Hey, how come we can't give Fem-Lackey one of the swords the other goons had?"
Obaga answered, "…Ororororo…" before Futashi knocked the sense back into him with the heel of his foot (don't ask how that works). Then much more sagely Nuhiro replied, "Himura-dono does not desire to pick up a real sword ever again, Futashi-kun. If he did, he would have picked up one before chasing after Aroji himself."
"But why?"
"He has no desire to kill de gozaru."
"But he--" Futashi bit back the comment before he said it too loudly. In a whisper and with a slightly bitter taste he finished, "…He has before."
Looking a bit saddened, Obaga placed a hand on the boy's shoulder. "It is true that he has slain many people before," he said with a sigh. "But that does not mean he has enjoyed it. While the reasons for Himura-dono's past actions can only be explained by Himura-dono alone, I am certain that he only did so thinking it was for a just cause."
"Well isn't this a just cause?" Futashi shot back, his eyes still full of confusion. "I mean, this is the bad guy! It's okay to kill the bad guy, right?!" Obaga didn't answer for a while and Futashi became impatient. "Well aren't I right?" he demanded.
"Some things cannot be explained through words, but only through experience," was the soft response, his voice echoing with wisdom beyond Futashi's comprehension.
"I haven't the slightest idea as to what that means, Old Man." Way beyond Futashi's comprehension apparently. Obaga deflated.
"Let me try another approach de gozaru. Even if it were justified in killing bad men, is it okay to make Himura-dono kill after he has sworn not to? What's more, wouldn't Himura-dono at one point fit under your definition of 'bad guys' de gozaru ka?" The boy remained silent. "Life is not as black and white and we would like it to be, Futashi-kun. We live in a world of grays."
Another moment without words. And then…
"Wow, that was deep!" Obaga blurted. Futashi watched in disbelief as the elder pulled out a small parchment of paper, ink, and brush. On the paper, several other lines had already been written and next to the last Obaga wrote another. "'World… of… grays…'" he muttered as he wrote. When he finished he cackled to himself. "I am good de gozaru!"
Slightly annoyed at the inappropriate interruption to his character development, Futashi asked, "What's that?"
"Oro? Oh, this is a list I've started of all the cool things I say de gozaru. I've been forgetting them recently and I don't want to forget in my old age how insightful and wise I am. Hey, I forgot about the 'cleaning house' one." He began scribbling away again, chuckling and praising himself under his breath.
Futashi groaned. "Just when I think you couldn't get any crazier…" He then paused in thought before adding, "Where exactly were you keeping all that stuff anyway?!"
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There are four common events of everyday life that are also considered some of the most dull and boring aspects of it. Listing from the most dull to the least dull, they are as follows: grass growing, paint drying, snail racing (which is actually more popular than most people would think), and water boiling. While Asuka found herself entertaining the least boring of these actions, her lack of patience wouldn't allow her to find an up side to this fact.
"You'd think for a teahouse we'd have some hot water handy!" she snorted sharply, tapping her foot impatiently, holding some clean towels and blanket, and yarn under one arm. She glared down at the warming water with a look so searing that it was a wonder she wasn't evaporating the liquid just by looking at it. "Come on!" she cried impatiently. "Boil!"
A single solitary bubble floated to the surface and burst in a tiny, inaudible pop! as an attempt to appease her. She nearly kicked the thing over for the taunt.
"Come on, there's no time for this! Nikko-chan and her baby need you! This could be a matter of life and death! Are you just going to sit there and take your sweet time to boil or are you going to do something about it?!"
…
"…"
…
"…"
...pop!
"GAH!"
Realizing she was conversing with a pot of water—-a stubborn pot of water—-she collected herself and turned to look out a nearby window that had the best view of the backyard and gate beyond. Much to both her relief and anxiety, there were no signs that could tell her if things were going well or not.
"You'd better be okay Nikko-chan," she murmured pensively under her breath. "Otherwise I'll never forgive him. Not Aroji or Himura."
(*pop!*)
"I didn't ask you."
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It is a well known fact that all extremely skilled swordsmen (and protagonists) always take stock of their situations in their opening paragraphs; especially when in battle. Himura Kenshin, an extremely skilled swordsman (and coincidentally the protagonist), was no exception to the rule. And at the moment, besides the usual internal lamentation of his attire, the disadvantages of his "weapon," and the casual thought spent on the absurdity of the situation (was that Obaga taking notes on the porch over there?), Kenshin had to say he was doing pretty well.
Aroji's moves were fairly easy to predict, and his speed wasn't as much of a threat as his strength. The only thing that had kept Himura from barely dodging every strike was the confinement of the kimono's skirt. However, with all the cuts in it, the material was no longer restricting and he found he could move faster and more easily now. As it was, Aroji's attacks were no longer getting through, but this wasn't the biggest problem. His largest obstacle was figuring out how to attack.
Aroji was a much larger man than Himura. No so much in height, but in bulk. While not in any need of help group sessions for the overweight, Aroji's build was broader than Kenshin's, his muscles being more thick than shapely. This made Kenshin's physical attacks much weaker. Not that he was a champion fist-fighter anyway, but in his current state he wouldn't have minded having that power. The umbrella wasn't strong enough to hold an attack against Himura's best vital areas (like a Ryuu Tsui Sen to the shoulder), and the sharp jabs seemed to have the same effect as a ball being thrown against a stone fortitude. Without his sakabatou, Kenshin found this was becoming a battle determined more on strength than speed.
Bugger, but sometimes being a shrimp could really bite.
Despite being a few pint-sizes smaller, the former assassin still firmly believed that skill and use of resource could topple any foe. It just took some serious thinking, serious planning, and serious attitude. Himura was ready to get serious.
As if on some unannounced signal that the narration was over, Aroji and Himura leapt apart from one another in a simultaneous, temporary retreat. It was a natural break to pause to gather breath while gauging your opponent, but neither man needed rest; just a plan.
Aroji's was very simple: kill Battousai. Kenshin's was also plain: save the others. While different, they shared a common thought: no matter what the cost.
"You've done well, Battousai," Aroji commended. "You lived up to my every expectation as the legendary hitokiri." He paused to stare at the delicate pattern on Kenshin's outfit before giving a blunt cough. "Well… almost every expectation anyway."
For apparent reasons (one obviously being how much that last statement ticked him off), Himura did not return the compliments. "It's coming time we ended this," he said, his voice lower than its usual octave. "I will give you one last chance to surrender peacefully."
Aroji laughed outright at the challenge. "Do you think I'm going to run away now? When I'm so close to fulfilling my goals?"
"Leave Nikko-dono and the others alone. I will not permit you to harm anyone here."
"Heh, you think this is just about her?" he scoffed. "I have much higher ambitions that she just conveniently fits into. The true objective of my clan is to make the creators of this government suffer by sending their ideal era into chaos before killing them all, one by one. Then, when Japan's leaders have been extinguished, I, the head behind the force, will take reign! Japan and all of its power and resources will be mine, and a new Shougunate will be reborn!"
Aroji's lips broke out into a wide, greedy grin as he let this revelation sink into Kenshin's mind, as well as the minds of the others who had turned to listen in. The pause that followed was one of shock and wonder.
"Wow," Futashi said at last, he being the best at ending awkward silences. "All that was missing from that villainous speech was the maniacal laughter."
Obaga nodded. "I feel kinda cheated without it de gozaru."
Kenshin just blinked back at his opponent. "You want to rule Japan? But you can't even afford a decent ninja!" To emphasize this point, Murobi passed by, rolling on the ground as he tried to kill/squash/remove the spiders covering him (apparently the kids had managed to catch him), his scratchy voice being very effective for screaming like a girl. The young pranksters followed a moment later, clearly enjoying their game while completely oblivious to the events around them.
Aroji kept a serious air. "This teahouse will serve our purposes, both in becoming a new base for out facilities, and in funding our ambitions. By taking over its residence and business, my men and I will be more than adequately supplied."
His audience of three blinked once again.
"Supplied with what de gozaru ka? Shelter and provisions or booze and women?"
"What men? We wiped them out back inside!"
"Aren't the police on the way? Sessha is pretty sure they won't just allow you to do this de gozaru."
Aroji sweat-dropped and growled. "Note to self: work on speech and timing after killing Battousai and fools."
"In any case," Kenshin interrupted, "it is as I have said. You will not harm anyone here, and I cannot allow you to carry out such evil goals." Holding the bumper shoot before him in an indication that he was ready, Himura leveled eyes with his opponent. "If you refuse to surrender, then come quickly. I don't want to waste any more time on you."
A wry grin. "And what exactly makes you think you have the right to stop me?"
Startled by the question, Himura looked up. "What?"
"What exactly makes you think you have the right to stop me?" he asked again. "Like I said before, you were the one who took away Nikko's happiness in the first place. What right do you have?"
The redhead scowled. "As sessha has said before, I may not be able to restore her happiness, but I will protect what peace they possess."
"Will you really be able to?"
Another glare met another grin.
"Enough talk," Himura stated firmly. "Let our skills prove our word and decide our rights."
Amatomo scoffed. "I'd like to see what trick you think you have up your sleeve and see if it can compare to mine." He slid into a stance as well. "What hope do you think you have?"
"Come and see."
There was a pause of tension and then…
…There was some more pausing and tension. Futashi scowled and turned to Obaga.
"What're they waiting for?" he asked, his impatience evident in his voice.
"This is an unusual situation de gozaru."
Futashi eyes Kenshin's kimono and umbrella. "Well I can see that."
"No, not that. Himura-dono is asking for Aroji to start the attack, but Himura-dono's stance is more of an offensive one than defensive. Your brother-in-law notices it too. He's trying to anticipate what Himura's strategy might be."
Being the son of a samurai, Futashi looked upon the battlefield and understood. "So what happens if Beef Head doesn't attack?"
Himura suddenly frowned at Aroji. "If you will not come to me, then I will come to you!" And in a blink he was sprinting forward with shocking speed.
Obaga leaned to Futashi, "Well, that might happen."
"Oh."
Finding the Battousai closing in too fast to slip into defense, Aroji kept his aggressive stance and lunged while thrusting his sword forward… right into the open flap of the umbrella. Unable to see his foe, Aroji tried to move the blade so it would slash open the obstruction or luckily strike his opponent. It did neither except help him lose his own grip as Himura shut the umbrella again, capturing Aroji's blade, and twisted both the parasol and sword, ripping the weapon from his hands. Giving the umbrella a quick fling to the side, the sword loosed itself from it and landed behind the ex-hitokiri, putting a lot of distance between it and its former master and leaving Aroji without a weapon in his hand.
"Yeah! Score one for the Fem-Lackey!" the boy cheered. Obaga gripped the child's shoulder to turn his attention back to the fight.
"There's still more de gozaru."
"Huh?"
Before Aroji could evade, Himura was underneath him, rapidly climbing up the floors with a Ryuu Shou Sen that Himura carried into the air. Turning the umbrella vertical for more support, Himura came down from above with a lighter, but still effective version of an old favorite technique. Then, landing behind him, Himura turned to finish off the most unusually executed combo of his life with a revised Ryuu Kan Sen. Closing in for the final strike, Himura was caught-off guard when Aroji half-blindly swept his arm out and connected a fist with Himura's jaw. The force behind it was powerful enough to knock the redhead back a yard or so, but not enough to knock him down.
Landing on his feet, Himura sprang forward to continue his attack before Aroji reached Obaga's sword. His opponent still had two more swords attached to his belt, and while Himura had put up a very confident front, he was not sure how long he could last against all—
That's when Himura noticed that Aroji's hand wasn't reaching for the sword, but for something tucked inside his…
"Himura-dono, look out!!"
(*Crack!*)
Blood spurted into the air as the smoke cleared from around the pistol barrel in Aroji's right hand.
"Himura!"
End of chapter nineteen.
Author's Notes:
*Gochan walks along, whistling and generally obvious to the world. Suddenly she stops at a poster she sees on the wall. Tearing it down, she reads it aloud.* Missing: Gochan, authoress of FF.net. Presumed dead. Please contact reviewers if found. *looks out at reviewers with a nervous smile and sweatdrop* Er, I guess it has been a while, hasn't it.
Wow guys, I'm really sorry. I don't know what to say. School and work had me really busy for a while, but overall, I'd say it was Writer's Block. Don't get me wrong, I knew WHAT I wanted to write; I just didn't know HOW I wanted to write it. ^^; But believe me, I have been working on this the entire time. I've just never been satisfied, plus I had some low self-esteem for a while. The deal is, I'm ending this fic that I've spent the last year writing soon. With all of the time and effort I've put into it, I'm NOT going to pull something out of my butt just for the sake of an update. I deserve better, and YOU deserve better. I'm still sorry I've been incompetent all the same.
Some of you may notice that this doesn't seem like the entire "final battle" that I said I was going to write. And you'd be correct. Due to lack of update, yet having a spot in my writing that would make a perfect chapter ending anyhow, I decided to cave and split this chapter into two parts. So there are actually still 2 installments left to the fic. The second half of this chapter, and the last (and "epilogue" of sorts, I guess). I know this has been a long wait for something so short, but the second half (which is a third way done) shall be longer, I promise.
Ah, I can already hear Jason M. Lee lecturing me on the existence of firearms in this time period. All I have to say to that is... *falls on knees and begs* Please DO! I actually learn very well from someone correcting my mistakes. And belive me, JML, the information you give me will go into my deep consideration when I eventually do a rewrite of this monster. So thanks in advance! ^_^
Just as a heads-up, the tone actually becomes more serious next chapter. This final battle is turning out not to be such a physical one, as it is a mental one. (...uh, does that count as a spoiler?) But don't worry. Somebody will get theirs in the end.
Again, my endless apologies to you! I had initially hoped to end this fic before Anime Expo (July 3-6), but now I'm hoping I get the next installment out before then! To the people who will be looking for me there, just know that I will probably be cosplaying as an extremely small Dokugakuji from Saiyuki (hey, I'm small and it was the only character left, gimmie a break) at some point at the con, and with a large cast of other Saiyuki characters; most of whom are really girls (only in cosplay could you do this). Other than that, I'm working on a shirt that will have "Gochan" on it. ...It'll probably just be some cheap white shirt written on with a black marker, so nothing impressive. *shrugs* I'm just trying to think of something that will make me more noticable to those who might want to find me.
Mega-thanks to Fujifunmum and Sunny for beta-reading this chapter and the next. Sorry to everyone else who may have wanted to, but I just felt most comfortable with these two at the time. Thanks!
I use my bio blurb to post the progress of my fics, so check my page to recieve news! Ja ne!