Yuki x Kyou
~I don't own Fruits Basket~
Thanks to all my reviewers, you rock!
I reuploaded the first few chapters- the ones without paragraphs-cause they were kinda bothering me ^_^ and, to anyone who wants this to have a lemon... I'm really sorry, but I'm kinda pathetic and the story's probably going to stay PG... highest, PG-13. I wish I could write one, but I really doubt that I'd be able to... it would probably suck if I tried. (My friends say I'm too naive for my own good.)
Um, if you thought Kyou was melodramatic in the last chapter... he's even worse in this one! And even more OOC! (yay for my inability to keep them in character! wow it's sad)
O-kay... I really don't like this chapter much. I rewrote it like 4 times and still don't like it. Sorry if it's a waste of time to read... but I wrote the next chapter and I like that one! So I guess I'm just going to post this as is... if it's horrible tell me, I'll try to rewrite it again ^_^
Chapter 9: Don't bother to explain- I understand perfectly
"K-kyou..."
Kyou didn't look at him, only walked away, heading in the general direction of (of course) the ladder to the roof. Yuki stood there for a few minutes, contemplating what to do, and what Kyou could be so upset about... 'I mean, sure, I told her I loved her, but I told her that I loved him, too... and he *knows* I love her like a sister... he does too! He's acting like a child! He knows better than that! What did he expect me to say? `No, Honda-san, to tell you the truth, I'm gay! I couldn't love you, not even if I wanted to!`? Who knows how she would have taken it! And it's not like I planned the way she found out!' Too preoccupied with his thoughts to pay attention to where he was walking, he hardly noticed he had left the room until found himself halfway up the ladder. He had intended to go to his room to think... Oh, what the hell, talking to Kyou was the only way to amend the situation, right? He couldn't stand having his love so angry with him. 'Okay. I'm gonna explain, he'll forgive me, I know he will.' Then he realized that talking to an irate Kyou was probably a very bad idea. That is, of course, unless he wanted to be thrown off the roof. But, if Kyou was upset enough to want to do that, then, maybe he deserved a few broken bones. They'd heal. Maybe faster than his heart, if Kyou didn't forgive him. 'What am I going to say? He's probably so mad he won't listen to me. God, please let him forgive me...' He started to approach Kyou, then faltered; 'I don't want to see his face looking like... *that* again..." He started walking again. 'I have to explain...' He only hoped he could find his voice while he tried to explain. It was killing him to see Kyou so upset. And the fact that it was his fault only made matters worse. "Kyou? Can we talk?"
Kyou felt like he might be sick. 'It was okay before I told him... but now... I can't live without him.' How could Yuki do this to him? 'Hah, knew it was too good to be true... I thought Tohru was like a sister to him... Damn, I'm stupid. I thought he was mine, but how the hell could someone as wonderful want *me*? Of course he loves Tohru, they deserve each other- they're both freaking perfect. He says he loves us both, but I don't want to share him! I want his heart, all to myself. ...Damn that sounds selfish. This sucks. I bet he'd rather have Tohru. Not that I can blame him; who would want an ugly monster like me? What was I thinking, falling for him... He's too good for me. He's got a great personality, at least when he feels like showing it. Not to mention, he's drop-dead gorgeous. Heh, must be great, bat your eyelashes and half the school swoons. I've gotta get over him... Damn, it hurts! The poor cat, the one that no one ever loved, scratch me behind the ears and I'm yours. I'm pathetic.' What the hell was he doing? He couldn't let this get to him! Nope, it didn't bother him at all! 'Come on, Kyou, it's not like you believe in `true love` and all that crap anyway.' He was fine when no one loved him before, why should he need anyone to now? 'What the hell am I supposed to do? It hurts to need him like this... but I do... and I want him to love me with his whole heart, I don't want it to be like this!' He heard from behind him, "Kyou? Can we talk?"
'Damn, I'm getting too predictable... of course he knew I'd be here. And how the hell did he get here without me noticing? I usually hear anything and everything that happens within 30 feet of me, I'm a cat for God's sake!' He silently ranted until he remembered he still hadn't answered Yuki, who had approached him nearly five minutes ago. 'Doubt I want to hear what he has to say, I'm not in the mood for some lame apology...' No way was he going to cry or something horribly embarrassing like that, and he didn't trust himself to give an answer without showing how upset he was, so, angry with himself, he decided Yuki didn't deserve a response. 'Yeah. *Real* mature.' "Kyou, let me explain..." 'Great, he's going to give me some stupid explanation... Don't wanna hear it...' "What is there to explain? You love Tohru, you lied to me when you said you were mine." "W-wait, Kyou...!" "Don't worry, I understand perfectly... I know you love me, I believe you." his voice cracked a little, and he hoped Yuki didn't notice. "But I can never have your whole heart. It's all right. I don't mind being second to little miss perfect." "No! You're wrong! That's not it at all, just let me explain!" Voice shaking in spite of himself, Kyou said, "It's all right, Yuki, I understand. And I love you, I always will. My heart is all yours, if you ever decide you want it. See you later. I'm going for a walk." As soon as he finished speaking, he jumped off the roof and went into the forest. "He... he entirely misunderstood." 'How am I going to explain if he won't listen?'
Yuki felt a few warm tears slide down his cheeks. It made him feel pathetic, but he couldn't stop them. God, was he ever right about Kyou seeing everything in black and white. He had taken an idea and run with it! How did Kyou wind up with a conclusion like *that*?! All he had said was that he loved both of them! He never said he loved Tohru more! And, if Kyou would have listened to him, he would have explained that it wasn't the same kind of love! Tohru was like a sister... and Kyou *definitely* knew Yuki wasn't into girls! Then he started to think. Kyou hadn't tried to hit him. That meant that Kyou wasn't angry; he was distraught, and that scared Yuki. He had never seen Kyou like this before. 'It was just a stupid misunderstanding! I try to soften the blow to Honda-san's emotions, and this is what happens?' God, he was beginning to hate history. If it wasn't for that stupid project... He sat down and pulled his knees to his chest, staring into the night. But, no matter how hard he looked, he couldn't see Kyou. Where had he gone? 'Kyou's so impulsive... and he obviously doesn't have a clear mind right now.' He was worried. What if something happened to Kyou while he was out there? What if he was hurt and couldn't get help? Even if Kyou wouldn't talk to him, even if Kyou never forgave him, he still loved Kyou and couldn't bear to see something happen to him. 'Ah, I've got to get my mind off of him, I'm sure he's fine. He took care of himself for years... if I go after him, he's only going to get more upset... okay. Distractions, distractions...' Yuki sang quietly to himself ('Kyou loves this song'), tried to think about schoolwork ('Kyou said he needed help with the math assignment...'), counted stars ('That group of stars looks an awful lot like a cat.'). Finally went downstairs to his room, because the roof made him think of that afternoon, and Kyou. He started to read. After ten minutes of reading the same paragraph ('Kyou always teases me about reading `english class books` for fun...') he decided it was useless to try to distract himself; he was (obviously) failing miserably.
Kyou walked for a while, staring at the ground; when he was about a mile from the house he stopped. Rubbing fists against his eyes, he was able to blink back the warm tears that were threating to cascade down his face. He would *not* let himself cry. Kyou Sohma would *not* cry over a boy, no matter much Kyou loved him, no matter how wonderful he was, how handsome, how... 'STOP IT! Stop being so weak! He is *not* wonderful! I do *not* love him,' Kyou lied to himself. He would not cry. Not in public, at least. Crying was horribly degrading. When he was alone in his room, it was bad enough- he saw himself cry and it disgusted him. But in public, *other people* could see him... that was mortifying. If someone saw him crying, he wouldn't be able to face them ever again. Although the acres of woods around Shigure's house weren't exactly public property, he couldn't risk it. So he resorted to punching trees. Yeah, that was masculine enough. 'I' [punch] 'do' [punch] 'not' [punch] 'love' [punch] 'Yuki' [punch] 'anymore' [punch] 'I' [punch] 'do'... He had to stop, his knuckles were shredded and starting to bleed from the rough surface of the bark. 'Heh, at least the pain takes my mind off of him.' His hand didn't hurt half as much as his heart. 'Why the hell did I let down my barriers...I used to be so strong!' He didn't stand a chance. Yuki's heart would never belong to him alone.
~I don't own Fruits Basket~
Thanks to all my reviewers, you rock!
I reuploaded the first few chapters- the ones without paragraphs-cause they were kinda bothering me ^_^ and, to anyone who wants this to have a lemon... I'm really sorry, but I'm kinda pathetic and the story's probably going to stay PG... highest, PG-13. I wish I could write one, but I really doubt that I'd be able to... it would probably suck if I tried. (My friends say I'm too naive for my own good.)
Um, if you thought Kyou was melodramatic in the last chapter... he's even worse in this one! And even more OOC! (yay for my inability to keep them in character! wow it's sad)
O-kay... I really don't like this chapter much. I rewrote it like 4 times and still don't like it. Sorry if it's a waste of time to read... but I wrote the next chapter and I like that one! So I guess I'm just going to post this as is... if it's horrible tell me, I'll try to rewrite it again ^_^
Chapter 9: Don't bother to explain- I understand perfectly
"K-kyou..."
Kyou didn't look at him, only walked away, heading in the general direction of (of course) the ladder to the roof. Yuki stood there for a few minutes, contemplating what to do, and what Kyou could be so upset about... 'I mean, sure, I told her I loved her, but I told her that I loved him, too... and he *knows* I love her like a sister... he does too! He's acting like a child! He knows better than that! What did he expect me to say? `No, Honda-san, to tell you the truth, I'm gay! I couldn't love you, not even if I wanted to!`? Who knows how she would have taken it! And it's not like I planned the way she found out!' Too preoccupied with his thoughts to pay attention to where he was walking, he hardly noticed he had left the room until found himself halfway up the ladder. He had intended to go to his room to think... Oh, what the hell, talking to Kyou was the only way to amend the situation, right? He couldn't stand having his love so angry with him. 'Okay. I'm gonna explain, he'll forgive me, I know he will.' Then he realized that talking to an irate Kyou was probably a very bad idea. That is, of course, unless he wanted to be thrown off the roof. But, if Kyou was upset enough to want to do that, then, maybe he deserved a few broken bones. They'd heal. Maybe faster than his heart, if Kyou didn't forgive him. 'What am I going to say? He's probably so mad he won't listen to me. God, please let him forgive me...' He started to approach Kyou, then faltered; 'I don't want to see his face looking like... *that* again..." He started walking again. 'I have to explain...' He only hoped he could find his voice while he tried to explain. It was killing him to see Kyou so upset. And the fact that it was his fault only made matters worse. "Kyou? Can we talk?"
Kyou felt like he might be sick. 'It was okay before I told him... but now... I can't live without him.' How could Yuki do this to him? 'Hah, knew it was too good to be true... I thought Tohru was like a sister to him... Damn, I'm stupid. I thought he was mine, but how the hell could someone as wonderful want *me*? Of course he loves Tohru, they deserve each other- they're both freaking perfect. He says he loves us both, but I don't want to share him! I want his heart, all to myself. ...Damn that sounds selfish. This sucks. I bet he'd rather have Tohru. Not that I can blame him; who would want an ugly monster like me? What was I thinking, falling for him... He's too good for me. He's got a great personality, at least when he feels like showing it. Not to mention, he's drop-dead gorgeous. Heh, must be great, bat your eyelashes and half the school swoons. I've gotta get over him... Damn, it hurts! The poor cat, the one that no one ever loved, scratch me behind the ears and I'm yours. I'm pathetic.' What the hell was he doing? He couldn't let this get to him! Nope, it didn't bother him at all! 'Come on, Kyou, it's not like you believe in `true love` and all that crap anyway.' He was fine when no one loved him before, why should he need anyone to now? 'What the hell am I supposed to do? It hurts to need him like this... but I do... and I want him to love me with his whole heart, I don't want it to be like this!' He heard from behind him, "Kyou? Can we talk?"
'Damn, I'm getting too predictable... of course he knew I'd be here. And how the hell did he get here without me noticing? I usually hear anything and everything that happens within 30 feet of me, I'm a cat for God's sake!' He silently ranted until he remembered he still hadn't answered Yuki, who had approached him nearly five minutes ago. 'Doubt I want to hear what he has to say, I'm not in the mood for some lame apology...' No way was he going to cry or something horribly embarrassing like that, and he didn't trust himself to give an answer without showing how upset he was, so, angry with himself, he decided Yuki didn't deserve a response. 'Yeah. *Real* mature.' "Kyou, let me explain..." 'Great, he's going to give me some stupid explanation... Don't wanna hear it...' "What is there to explain? You love Tohru, you lied to me when you said you were mine." "W-wait, Kyou...!" "Don't worry, I understand perfectly... I know you love me, I believe you." his voice cracked a little, and he hoped Yuki didn't notice. "But I can never have your whole heart. It's all right. I don't mind being second to little miss perfect." "No! You're wrong! That's not it at all, just let me explain!" Voice shaking in spite of himself, Kyou said, "It's all right, Yuki, I understand. And I love you, I always will. My heart is all yours, if you ever decide you want it. See you later. I'm going for a walk." As soon as he finished speaking, he jumped off the roof and went into the forest. "He... he entirely misunderstood." 'How am I going to explain if he won't listen?'
Yuki felt a few warm tears slide down his cheeks. It made him feel pathetic, but he couldn't stop them. God, was he ever right about Kyou seeing everything in black and white. He had taken an idea and run with it! How did Kyou wind up with a conclusion like *that*?! All he had said was that he loved both of them! He never said he loved Tohru more! And, if Kyou would have listened to him, he would have explained that it wasn't the same kind of love! Tohru was like a sister... and Kyou *definitely* knew Yuki wasn't into girls! Then he started to think. Kyou hadn't tried to hit him. That meant that Kyou wasn't angry; he was distraught, and that scared Yuki. He had never seen Kyou like this before. 'It was just a stupid misunderstanding! I try to soften the blow to Honda-san's emotions, and this is what happens?' God, he was beginning to hate history. If it wasn't for that stupid project... He sat down and pulled his knees to his chest, staring into the night. But, no matter how hard he looked, he couldn't see Kyou. Where had he gone? 'Kyou's so impulsive... and he obviously doesn't have a clear mind right now.' He was worried. What if something happened to Kyou while he was out there? What if he was hurt and couldn't get help? Even if Kyou wouldn't talk to him, even if Kyou never forgave him, he still loved Kyou and couldn't bear to see something happen to him. 'Ah, I've got to get my mind off of him, I'm sure he's fine. He took care of himself for years... if I go after him, he's only going to get more upset... okay. Distractions, distractions...' Yuki sang quietly to himself ('Kyou loves this song'), tried to think about schoolwork ('Kyou said he needed help with the math assignment...'), counted stars ('That group of stars looks an awful lot like a cat.'). Finally went downstairs to his room, because the roof made him think of that afternoon, and Kyou. He started to read. After ten minutes of reading the same paragraph ('Kyou always teases me about reading `english class books` for fun...') he decided it was useless to try to distract himself; he was (obviously) failing miserably.
Kyou walked for a while, staring at the ground; when he was about a mile from the house he stopped. Rubbing fists against his eyes, he was able to blink back the warm tears that were threating to cascade down his face. He would *not* let himself cry. Kyou Sohma would *not* cry over a boy, no matter much Kyou loved him, no matter how wonderful he was, how handsome, how... 'STOP IT! Stop being so weak! He is *not* wonderful! I do *not* love him,' Kyou lied to himself. He would not cry. Not in public, at least. Crying was horribly degrading. When he was alone in his room, it was bad enough- he saw himself cry and it disgusted him. But in public, *other people* could see him... that was mortifying. If someone saw him crying, he wouldn't be able to face them ever again. Although the acres of woods around Shigure's house weren't exactly public property, he couldn't risk it. So he resorted to punching trees. Yeah, that was masculine enough. 'I' [punch] 'do' [punch] 'not' [punch] 'love' [punch] 'Yuki' [punch] 'anymore' [punch] 'I' [punch] 'do'... He had to stop, his knuckles were shredded and starting to bleed from the rough surface of the bark. 'Heh, at least the pain takes my mind off of him.' His hand didn't hurt half as much as his heart. 'Why the hell did I let down my barriers...I used to be so strong!' He didn't stand a chance. Yuki's heart would never belong to him alone.