Disclaimer: I do not own Gollum, Frodo, Sam or anything else from LOTR, but if I find any reference of Gollum and anorexia my arsonists will hunt you down! (P.S. I really do have an arsonist) (P.P.S. Really)

Note: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I am disheartened by my lack of reviews.

When Frodo arrived at the medical center, he recognized a familiar face going into the pediatrics ward. It was Gollum, who Sam was leading around on a leash (The kind parents use to drag their children around at the zoo so they don't get lost).

"NO!!! Please don't take us to see a doctor! Stupid, fat Hobbit! Precious, we are fine! We are not anorexic! We are just a little underweight, precious! Just because you're fat doesn't mean we has to be, precious!" Gollum screamed.

"You need to gain weight by eating a variety of foods! You need to eat your taters and chips at dinner!" Sam yelled.

Gollum gave Sam a confused look.

"POE - TATE - OES!" Sam said impatiently.

"Fine," Gollum begrudgingly agreed, "We shall eat our taters, precious. But you still keep nasty chips!"

Sam rolled his eyes and gave another tug on the leash.

Frodo settled uneasily back into his seat.