Chapter 3: Sam In A Robe!
"How soon is SOON?" Ashley demanded, biting Chelsea to give her the blood bottle.
"Yeow! [bleeping] [bleep]!" Billy Baldwin ran in when needed.
"Did anyone ever tell you you're hot?" Ashley asked David, who was enjoying a carton full of worms.
"Want some?" he offered Chelsea, who was humming mindlessly.
"What is it?" she wanted to know.
"Worms."
"Ew!" she wrinkled her face, looking somewhat like ugly Jamie Lee Curtis.
"Well, we have some maggots, if you'd prefer - "
"Okie!" she exclaimed and downed a bunch of maggots.
"Marco!" Ashley jumped in front of Marco.
"Uh," he started at the bunny on caffiene. "Polo?"
"Toot toot!" she whistled.
"Don't you guys feel anything weird?" Dwayne questioned from the couch while Laddie was sound asleep.
"I feel a weird sensation for carrots!" Ashley hit Laddie's stuffed bar with carrot nun-chucks.
"I gotta new sensation for Billy Baldwin!" Chelsea shrieked, awaking Laddie from his slumber.
"Someone say my name?" someone appeared.
"Billy Baldwin!!" Ashley cooed, running up to him and fondeling his manhood.
"Wait!" Chelsea ran up. "That's Stephen Baldwin!"
"How do *YOU* know?!" Ashley kept on touching.
"Because Billy is on the floor, censoring your groping!"
"EEK!" Ashley leapt away, spat on her hands and died. Well, not really.
"Why exactly did you want to transform these two blondes?" Paul whispered to Dav id.
Hot David smiled hotly and looked to Ashley, who was still smacking Laddie, then to Chelsea, who was singing "It's Raining Men."
"They live across the street from the Emerson's," David explained. "It won't be long before we get these two to get those two to join!"
"Ah! I see said the blind man to his deaf wife and the crippled kids danced a jig it's all coming back to me now as the guy peed into the wind!" Paul grinned.
But the grin disapeared when David swatted him across his Twisted-Sister like face.
"I'll tell them their objective when we go to the train tracks. I'll just tell them they're 007 and they'll think they're on some world-saving mission." David laughed.
"Good idea, dude!" Paul tittered.
hah. titter.
"Honeys! I'm home!" hippie-Star entered the cavern, bright-eyed and ditzy. "Where's my David?"
"YOU'RE DAVID?!" Ashley freaked. "YOU BITCH!!! HI YAH!" she lunged at Star and beat the hell out of her until she couldn't be recognizable by police.
"Why did you do that?!" David and Laddie shuoted in unison.
"I'M your Star now! Well, only I'm a bunny." she said proudly, still hopping around.
"Don't you think it's time to go to those train tracks now?" Marco asked no one in particular. He just hadn't said anything for a while.
"Wait," David held up his gloved hand. "Allison, Cassie, come here."
"Excuse me!" Chelsea bucked up to David. "I'm Chelsea. Chelsea Pan Potter Baldwin Haim Emerson!"
"Yeah! And I'm Ashley Malfoy Feldman Winter Isaacs Felton Sutherland David!" Ashley insisted.
"Whatever!" David exclaimed, giving Ashley a sexy look for some reason.
Ashley died.
"You guys want to do a job for me?"
"For sexy David? ANYTHING!" Ashley fell to her knees.
"Yes," David hadn't realized that this was going to be so easy. "Chelsea, I want you to be Harry Potter - "
"DONE!"
"And Ashley, I want you to be Draco Malfoy - "
"DONER!"
"And I want you to do something for me. I want you to bring Sam and Michael Emerson here, so they can join our posse." David smiled to Ashley, and she died again.
"Should Billy come in if you're dying? Isn't that, uh, not exactly suitable for children?" Chelsea asked.
"HEY! I DON'T TELL YOU HOW TO DO YOUR JOB!" Billy Baldwin's voice rang through the musty air.
"DUDE! That was the smartest thing you've said all . . your life!" Ashley realized.
"I know! . . . HEY!"
"Go! Now!" David roared.
"Oh yeah! This is for calling us blondes, Paul!" Ashley ran towards Paul in rage-mode. But before she could, however, Chelsea and Ashley's sight went hazy and blurry and they fell asleep.
~
"What are you guys doing here?" a hot voice demanded, shocked.
Chelsea's eyes fluttered open to Sam standing over her in his bathrobe. Billy Baldwin was on the floor beside Chelsea (I wish), holding a black censored sign over Sam's goods.
Chelsea died from this hot sight, and Billy did his job for her too, then disapeared.
"Hellooo!?" Sam waved a skinny hand over Chelsea's face and kicked her.
Ashley woke up then, whipped off her bunny suit, took out her hair gel and cape, and gelled her hair back. "My name's Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."
Sam snorted.
"Think my names funny do you? No need to ask yours. Blondish hair, and a . . . uh, robe, YOU'RE AN EMERSON!"
"Right." Sam rolled his eyes at Ashley.
"Where's Michael?" Chelsea asked.
"Eating my dog." Sam joked.
"Get him. We're going. And keep that robe on." Chelsea smiled and whipped open Sam's rboe.
Alec Baldwin rushed out, and blocked Chelsea's view of Sam.
"Where's Billy?" Ashley stomped her foot.
"He's in the can. I had to run in." Alec said.
Sam did up his robe and Alec left. "How did you guys get in here?"
"We're, uh, pixies." Ashley guffawed.
Sam furrowed his hot eyebrows. "I'll go get Michael."
"Michael's ugly." Ashley declared, and Chelsea began to sing "U-G-L-Y you ain't got no alibi, you ugly!"
They all left when Michael Ugly Pants came down, and they set out for the train tracks for depantsing of Michael's pants and transformation. Perhaps a little biteage on the way. *oops!*
"How soon is SOON?" Ashley demanded, biting Chelsea to give her the blood bottle.
"Yeow! [bleeping] [bleep]!" Billy Baldwin ran in when needed.
"Did anyone ever tell you you're hot?" Ashley asked David, who was enjoying a carton full of worms.
"Want some?" he offered Chelsea, who was humming mindlessly.
"What is it?" she wanted to know.
"Worms."
"Ew!" she wrinkled her face, looking somewhat like ugly Jamie Lee Curtis.
"Well, we have some maggots, if you'd prefer - "
"Okie!" she exclaimed and downed a bunch of maggots.
"Marco!" Ashley jumped in front of Marco.
"Uh," he started at the bunny on caffiene. "Polo?"
"Toot toot!" she whistled.
"Don't you guys feel anything weird?" Dwayne questioned from the couch while Laddie was sound asleep.
"I feel a weird sensation for carrots!" Ashley hit Laddie's stuffed bar with carrot nun-chucks.
"I gotta new sensation for Billy Baldwin!" Chelsea shrieked, awaking Laddie from his slumber.
"Someone say my name?" someone appeared.
"Billy Baldwin!!" Ashley cooed, running up to him and fondeling his manhood.
"Wait!" Chelsea ran up. "That's Stephen Baldwin!"
"How do *YOU* know?!" Ashley kept on touching.
"Because Billy is on the floor, censoring your groping!"
"EEK!" Ashley leapt away, spat on her hands and died. Well, not really.
"Why exactly did you want to transform these two blondes?" Paul whispered to Dav id.
Hot David smiled hotly and looked to Ashley, who was still smacking Laddie, then to Chelsea, who was singing "It's Raining Men."
"They live across the street from the Emerson's," David explained. "It won't be long before we get these two to get those two to join!"
"Ah! I see said the blind man to his deaf wife and the crippled kids danced a jig it's all coming back to me now as the guy peed into the wind!" Paul grinned.
But the grin disapeared when David swatted him across his Twisted-Sister like face.
"I'll tell them their objective when we go to the train tracks. I'll just tell them they're 007 and they'll think they're on some world-saving mission." David laughed.
"Good idea, dude!" Paul tittered.
hah. titter.
"Honeys! I'm home!" hippie-Star entered the cavern, bright-eyed and ditzy. "Where's my David?"
"YOU'RE DAVID?!" Ashley freaked. "YOU BITCH!!! HI YAH!" she lunged at Star and beat the hell out of her until she couldn't be recognizable by police.
"Why did you do that?!" David and Laddie shuoted in unison.
"I'M your Star now! Well, only I'm a bunny." she said proudly, still hopping around.
"Don't you think it's time to go to those train tracks now?" Marco asked no one in particular. He just hadn't said anything for a while.
"Wait," David held up his gloved hand. "Allison, Cassie, come here."
"Excuse me!" Chelsea bucked up to David. "I'm Chelsea. Chelsea Pan Potter Baldwin Haim Emerson!"
"Yeah! And I'm Ashley Malfoy Feldman Winter Isaacs Felton Sutherland David!" Ashley insisted.
"Whatever!" David exclaimed, giving Ashley a sexy look for some reason.
Ashley died.
"You guys want to do a job for me?"
"For sexy David? ANYTHING!" Ashley fell to her knees.
"Yes," David hadn't realized that this was going to be so easy. "Chelsea, I want you to be Harry Potter - "
"DONE!"
"And Ashley, I want you to be Draco Malfoy - "
"DONER!"
"And I want you to do something for me. I want you to bring Sam and Michael Emerson here, so they can join our posse." David smiled to Ashley, and she died again.
"Should Billy come in if you're dying? Isn't that, uh, not exactly suitable for children?" Chelsea asked.
"HEY! I DON'T TELL YOU HOW TO DO YOUR JOB!" Billy Baldwin's voice rang through the musty air.
"DUDE! That was the smartest thing you've said all . . your life!" Ashley realized.
"I know! . . . HEY!"
"Go! Now!" David roared.
"Oh yeah! This is for calling us blondes, Paul!" Ashley ran towards Paul in rage-mode. But before she could, however, Chelsea and Ashley's sight went hazy and blurry and they fell asleep.
~
"What are you guys doing here?" a hot voice demanded, shocked.
Chelsea's eyes fluttered open to Sam standing over her in his bathrobe. Billy Baldwin was on the floor beside Chelsea (I wish), holding a black censored sign over Sam's goods.
Chelsea died from this hot sight, and Billy did his job for her too, then disapeared.
"Hellooo!?" Sam waved a skinny hand over Chelsea's face and kicked her.
Ashley woke up then, whipped off her bunny suit, took out her hair gel and cape, and gelled her hair back. "My name's Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."
Sam snorted.
"Think my names funny do you? No need to ask yours. Blondish hair, and a . . . uh, robe, YOU'RE AN EMERSON!"
"Right." Sam rolled his eyes at Ashley.
"Where's Michael?" Chelsea asked.
"Eating my dog." Sam joked.
"Get him. We're going. And keep that robe on." Chelsea smiled and whipped open Sam's rboe.
Alec Baldwin rushed out, and blocked Chelsea's view of Sam.
"Where's Billy?" Ashley stomped her foot.
"He's in the can. I had to run in." Alec said.
Sam did up his robe and Alec left. "How did you guys get in here?"
"We're, uh, pixies." Ashley guffawed.
Sam furrowed his hot eyebrows. "I'll go get Michael."
"Michael's ugly." Ashley declared, and Chelsea began to sing "U-G-L-Y you ain't got no alibi, you ugly!"
They all left when Michael Ugly Pants came down, and they set out for the train tracks for depantsing of Michael's pants and transformation. Perhaps a little biteage on the way. *oops!*