And, let's just skip a day because nothing happened, and get to tomorrow,
where...
"Ohhhh what a beautiful morning..."
"LOGAN! Hurry up and get out the bathroom so I can use it!" Jean howls. "You've been in there twenty minutes already!"
"Ohhh what a beautiful day--just coming, Jean--I've got a beautiful feeling..."
"Logan, I never knew you could sing," Jean comments, standing outside the bathroom door holding a towel.
"Lots of things you don't know, Jeanie."
"Well, just hurry up, alright?"
Logan pulls the door open and Jean nearly falls in. "Thank you!"
Logan shrugs and wanders back to his room, whistling. Captain America follows him out of the bathroom.
"Got any more guys hidden in the shower, Logan?"
"Just this one."
"What is up with him?" Jean asks herself. "He's never sung before. Certainly not 'Oh what a beautiful morning'."
[A/N: Anyone else see Hugh Jackman on Parkinson?!]
Meanwhile, Rogue is plotting. Again. Kurt is adding another chapter to his autobiography, but he hasn't got out of bed yet. Logan and the Captain are in Logan's room, so let's not mention them. Maggie and Charlie are watching Jerry Springer. Jean is in the shower, of course, and Ororo is watching Kurt write. The twins are in their new room, a room Ororo had been using to hoard old TV guides that she had to throw out when Captain America moved into Logan's room and what was going on in there was no longer suitable for the eyes of ten-year-olds. Anyway. The twins are now arguing over their bunk beds. Pietro, who had the bottom one last night, now wants to swap over so he can have the top one, but Wanda thinks she should have it all the time. Now they're fighting. Wanda has just hit Pietro with a hardback book, and Pietro says it wasn't fair.
"Wanda it's not fair! You can't do that! It's cheating and I'm going to tell Dad on you because you're mean to me and unfair and I hate you Wanda."
When Pietro's agitated he talks even faster.
"Well, if you want, I could hit you with something harder."
"No, Wanda! It's not nice to be violent!"
"Who says? You?"
"Yes."
"Ha, like I care!" And she grabs the nearest object--a lamp--and hits him with it.
"WAAAANDA! STOP IT!"
The bathroom backs on to the twins' room. Jean hears them yelling over the running of the shower and sighs.
* * * * *
"So that's my plan," Jean says proudly, smiling at Rogue.
"That's great! Where d'you come up with these things?"
"Ororo says I have a devious mind," she grins, and then her face falls. "Well. She did." "Anyway, where can we get a really big box to fit three--I mean, two--people in?"
"Ah'll ask Charlie."
"Charlie's a moron, he won't know. I mean, he still gets lost in this mansion and he's lived here longer than he can remember."
"So why is HE your leader?"
"Free food, he lets us stay in his huge fancy house for free, and he's a great guy really. He's so open-minded about everything. Mutants, homosexuality, everything that means no one in the world would want us, and he thinks it's all great and encourages it."
"Doesn't that just suggest that he's insane?"
"Charlie is beyond insane. Waaay beyond it."
"Okay then. Well, Ah'll ask Maggie then."
She gets up and walks downstairs, Jean following.
"Maggie, can Ah have a really big box so Ah can put your kids in it and ship them off to Africa?"
"No! They're my kids, Rogue! Who's idea was this?"
Jean and Rogue look and then point at each other.
"Well, it's not very nice. What have I said about being nice to people?"
"Was it, 'Anyone who gets in my way will die, I'm taking over the world'?"
"After the therapy."
"Oh, oh, oh!" Rogue cries. "Ah know! It was, 'those kids are annoying brats, get rid of them!'"
"Sorry Mags, you started it," Jean says firmly.
"Yes, well, that is beside the point. You're not to kidnap my children, put them in boxes, or anything else."
"Aww, you never let us have any fun."
* * * * *
"I've written a whole chapter about you, Ororo," Kurt smiles. "And it's the last chapter, so now I can send it off to the publisher. I'm dedicating this book to the X-Men, and I'm calling it 'My Life as an X-Man'."
"What've you written in the dedication then? 'For Charlie, who got me where I am today; for Jean, thanks for that day we went to the ice cream parlour; for Katherine, my Shadowcat, for all your help with my heterophobia; for Logan, who's always been good with his hands; for Maggie, who taught me that therapy does work; for Rogue, the newest member, you'll be a great addition to the team; for the twins, who've not been in the mansion long but their mark on the furniture will always be there; and finally for Ororo, my beloved Weather Witch.' Aww, that's sweet, Kurt."
He blushes. "Danke, Ororo."
"But what day when you and Jean went to the ice cream parlour? I don't remember that."
He blushes more. "It was erm, a long time ago."
"Oh, okay. Imagine Kurt, you could make a fortune with this! What are you going to spend it all on?"
"I thought maybe I could buy a decent X-Van for the team," he begins. "And then I think I'd like to buy a new bed. And a fridge for my room, so I don't have to get up to eat. And after that, who knows? I'll buy you lots of presents."
"Thank you." She hugs him and then gently runs her hands along his tail.
"Naughty, naughty, Ororo," he teases.
"Hey, come on, you're complaining?" she pushes him backwards so he's lying down.
* * * * *
"Where IS everyone?" Jean asks, once again forced to spend time with Katherine, since everyone else is paired up. Logan, Captain America. Ororo, Kurt. Maggie, Charlie. Wanda, Pietro. Rogue, her plans to get Kurt. "And, another question everyone should be asking, what happened to Spider-Man?"
"We dumped him in the basement, remember? And then forgot all about him. Must've been at least a week since anyone gave him anything to eat or drink. Oops."
"Do you think we should go down there and check on him?" Jean asks worriedly.
"Yeah, okay."
* * * * *
"Heyyy, Spidey?" Jean calls cautiously into the darkness. "Put the light on, Kitty."
"I'm not called Kitty! I'm called Katherine! Sheesh, get it right, girl."
"Whatever." She blinks as Katherine flicks the light on and the bulb dangling suddenly glows bright yellow. "Where is he?"
"He's dead, isn't he?" Katherine asks, not all that concerned. "Hang on, let me check. I'm a doctor, you know."
"Yes, I know."
"Let's see... no pulse, no heartbeat, and he's freezing cold. Yes, he's dead. Hey... this is one of Rogue's gloves, isn't it?" She holds it up.
"Maybe she just left it down here when she was feeding him. Unless..."
"She killed him!"
"Yeah, I bet she did! I bet she came down here some time, pulled her glove off, turned her power on, attacked the Spidey Dude, and then on her way out she left her glove behind. This is serious. We have to tell Charlie!"
* * * * *
"She's a murderer, Charlie! She killed Spider-Man! She's dangerous!"
"Ridiculous, Jean. She's a heshe, heshe's are groovy."
"Yes, but she still killed someone!"
"I think that Spider-Man probably died of starvation. Did you remember to feed him, Jean? Katherine?"
"Well, no..."
"I thought Kurt said he was going to do it for me," Katherine lies.
"You're both murderers too!" Charlie cries cheerfully. "And Ororo's always going for old people, you know how they annoy her, and the animals round here don't stand a chance when Kurt's behind the wheel of the X-Van."
"Oh, well, I guess so," Jean says, considering.
"And we didn't even like him anyway. But, we ought to have a funeral because that is the right and proper thing to do. Also, funerals are groovy."
"Ohhhh what a beautiful morning..."
"LOGAN! Hurry up and get out the bathroom so I can use it!" Jean howls. "You've been in there twenty minutes already!"
"Ohhh what a beautiful day--just coming, Jean--I've got a beautiful feeling..."
"Logan, I never knew you could sing," Jean comments, standing outside the bathroom door holding a towel.
"Lots of things you don't know, Jeanie."
"Well, just hurry up, alright?"
Logan pulls the door open and Jean nearly falls in. "Thank you!"
Logan shrugs and wanders back to his room, whistling. Captain America follows him out of the bathroom.
"Got any more guys hidden in the shower, Logan?"
"Just this one."
"What is up with him?" Jean asks herself. "He's never sung before. Certainly not 'Oh what a beautiful morning'."
[A/N: Anyone else see Hugh Jackman on Parkinson?!]
Meanwhile, Rogue is plotting. Again. Kurt is adding another chapter to his autobiography, but he hasn't got out of bed yet. Logan and the Captain are in Logan's room, so let's not mention them. Maggie and Charlie are watching Jerry Springer. Jean is in the shower, of course, and Ororo is watching Kurt write. The twins are in their new room, a room Ororo had been using to hoard old TV guides that she had to throw out when Captain America moved into Logan's room and what was going on in there was no longer suitable for the eyes of ten-year-olds. Anyway. The twins are now arguing over their bunk beds. Pietro, who had the bottom one last night, now wants to swap over so he can have the top one, but Wanda thinks she should have it all the time. Now they're fighting. Wanda has just hit Pietro with a hardback book, and Pietro says it wasn't fair.
"Wanda it's not fair! You can't do that! It's cheating and I'm going to tell Dad on you because you're mean to me and unfair and I hate you Wanda."
When Pietro's agitated he talks even faster.
"Well, if you want, I could hit you with something harder."
"No, Wanda! It's not nice to be violent!"
"Who says? You?"
"Yes."
"Ha, like I care!" And she grabs the nearest object--a lamp--and hits him with it.
"WAAAANDA! STOP IT!"
The bathroom backs on to the twins' room. Jean hears them yelling over the running of the shower and sighs.
* * * * *
"So that's my plan," Jean says proudly, smiling at Rogue.
"That's great! Where d'you come up with these things?"
"Ororo says I have a devious mind," she grins, and then her face falls. "Well. She did." "Anyway, where can we get a really big box to fit three--I mean, two--people in?"
"Ah'll ask Charlie."
"Charlie's a moron, he won't know. I mean, he still gets lost in this mansion and he's lived here longer than he can remember."
"So why is HE your leader?"
"Free food, he lets us stay in his huge fancy house for free, and he's a great guy really. He's so open-minded about everything. Mutants, homosexuality, everything that means no one in the world would want us, and he thinks it's all great and encourages it."
"Doesn't that just suggest that he's insane?"
"Charlie is beyond insane. Waaay beyond it."
"Okay then. Well, Ah'll ask Maggie then."
She gets up and walks downstairs, Jean following.
"Maggie, can Ah have a really big box so Ah can put your kids in it and ship them off to Africa?"
"No! They're my kids, Rogue! Who's idea was this?"
Jean and Rogue look and then point at each other.
"Well, it's not very nice. What have I said about being nice to people?"
"Was it, 'Anyone who gets in my way will die, I'm taking over the world'?"
"After the therapy."
"Oh, oh, oh!" Rogue cries. "Ah know! It was, 'those kids are annoying brats, get rid of them!'"
"Sorry Mags, you started it," Jean says firmly.
"Yes, well, that is beside the point. You're not to kidnap my children, put them in boxes, or anything else."
"Aww, you never let us have any fun."
* * * * *
"I've written a whole chapter about you, Ororo," Kurt smiles. "And it's the last chapter, so now I can send it off to the publisher. I'm dedicating this book to the X-Men, and I'm calling it 'My Life as an X-Man'."
"What've you written in the dedication then? 'For Charlie, who got me where I am today; for Jean, thanks for that day we went to the ice cream parlour; for Katherine, my Shadowcat, for all your help with my heterophobia; for Logan, who's always been good with his hands; for Maggie, who taught me that therapy does work; for Rogue, the newest member, you'll be a great addition to the team; for the twins, who've not been in the mansion long but their mark on the furniture will always be there; and finally for Ororo, my beloved Weather Witch.' Aww, that's sweet, Kurt."
He blushes. "Danke, Ororo."
"But what day when you and Jean went to the ice cream parlour? I don't remember that."
He blushes more. "It was erm, a long time ago."
"Oh, okay. Imagine Kurt, you could make a fortune with this! What are you going to spend it all on?"
"I thought maybe I could buy a decent X-Van for the team," he begins. "And then I think I'd like to buy a new bed. And a fridge for my room, so I don't have to get up to eat. And after that, who knows? I'll buy you lots of presents."
"Thank you." She hugs him and then gently runs her hands along his tail.
"Naughty, naughty, Ororo," he teases.
"Hey, come on, you're complaining?" she pushes him backwards so he's lying down.
* * * * *
"Where IS everyone?" Jean asks, once again forced to spend time with Katherine, since everyone else is paired up. Logan, Captain America. Ororo, Kurt. Maggie, Charlie. Wanda, Pietro. Rogue, her plans to get Kurt. "And, another question everyone should be asking, what happened to Spider-Man?"
"We dumped him in the basement, remember? And then forgot all about him. Must've been at least a week since anyone gave him anything to eat or drink. Oops."
"Do you think we should go down there and check on him?" Jean asks worriedly.
"Yeah, okay."
* * * * *
"Heyyy, Spidey?" Jean calls cautiously into the darkness. "Put the light on, Kitty."
"I'm not called Kitty! I'm called Katherine! Sheesh, get it right, girl."
"Whatever." She blinks as Katherine flicks the light on and the bulb dangling suddenly glows bright yellow. "Where is he?"
"He's dead, isn't he?" Katherine asks, not all that concerned. "Hang on, let me check. I'm a doctor, you know."
"Yes, I know."
"Let's see... no pulse, no heartbeat, and he's freezing cold. Yes, he's dead. Hey... this is one of Rogue's gloves, isn't it?" She holds it up.
"Maybe she just left it down here when she was feeding him. Unless..."
"She killed him!"
"Yeah, I bet she did! I bet she came down here some time, pulled her glove off, turned her power on, attacked the Spidey Dude, and then on her way out she left her glove behind. This is serious. We have to tell Charlie!"
* * * * *
"She's a murderer, Charlie! She killed Spider-Man! She's dangerous!"
"Ridiculous, Jean. She's a heshe, heshe's are groovy."
"Yes, but she still killed someone!"
"I think that Spider-Man probably died of starvation. Did you remember to feed him, Jean? Katherine?"
"Well, no..."
"I thought Kurt said he was going to do it for me," Katherine lies.
"You're both murderers too!" Charlie cries cheerfully. "And Ororo's always going for old people, you know how they annoy her, and the animals round here don't stand a chance when Kurt's behind the wheel of the X-Van."
"Oh, well, I guess so," Jean says, considering.
"And we didn't even like him anyway. But, we ought to have a funeral because that is the right and proper thing to do. Also, funerals are groovy."