Chapter 7

By May she felt comfortable with the basic training that Mark and I had given her, and so she signed an official contract. She had been appearing on television since the night in Vegas, but May was her first real match. That was when she really started hanging out with the people in the back, getting to really know them instead of just learning their names. She started hanging out with us in the cafeterias and on the planes and on busses and everything else. Even at hotel breakfasts she spent less time with Mark and I and more time mingling with everyone else. I didn't really mind though. I didn't blame her. I was happy for her. She was having a lot of fun.

And then she met Sable.

Sable had the Women's Title at the time.

Like any women fighting, they were completely rude and polite at the same time in their insults, seeming almost sweet. Like for example, Sable said to her, with a smile, "Hmm…John told me that he wasn't leaving much behind. Now I see what he meant." To which Amber laughed and said: "Well if he wasn't leaving much behind I really wonder what you must be."

Their quarrel went back and forth until I came and made an attempt to break them up. Amber smiled as I hugger her, her back to me, and she said to Sable, in an almost yawning way, "Well I don't care. You can have him. I have a real man."

For her first match she wanted a shot at the Women's Title, which Vince told her she could do. I laughed the whole time during the match, watching as she beat up on Sable for real, and winning, which was not supposed to happen. She had my music, and as it played she stood over Sable and did a version of my pyro…kind of cute really. She took some time with her victory dances before coming backstage, glowing with her happiness over her accomplishments. Sable came in later, storming in and glaring.

"Bitch!" she hissed. Amber laughed.

"Not necessarily."

They began to fight again, and again I had to break them up. Mark held Sable back this time as I held Amber. Amber was being aggressive now and trying to squirm away from me, but I wouldn't let her. I pulled her back into the dressing room and let her go. She turned to me and just laughed and laughed.

"What the hell was that?" I began to laugh also. She hugged me. We stood there for a while as she still giggled.

"I'm sorry…I couldn't help it. I wanted the belt."

I couldn't help but to laugh then. "Vince is going to be pissed, you know."

"Pshh," she picked up the belt and admired it. "That's okay. I still have it for now until he makes me give it up."

Mark kicked the door open and walked in, laughing as he hugged Amber. "That's my girl."

They got along great. I loved them both. They made me so happy. They worked together beautifully and I loved watching them talk to each other because of both of their enthusiasm. And Amber loved being attacked my Mark only to be rescued by me. She was a hands-on person when it came to wrestling. It excited her wildly. All she wanted to do was wrestle and run down the ramp to slide into the ring and bounce around on the ropes. When I had a match she wouldn't settle for watching it, either. She had to be at ringside. And she loved my pyros. She loved pyros in general. After about a month with us she was crazed. The Federation had lit a flame in her that had changed her completely and probably wouldn't leave her. She no longer cared about her past and no longer worried about her future. She was having too much fun for that. Her eyes had lost all melancholy shine and were replaced with electricity. And she was totally in love with me, and I was in love with her. It was a perfect coexistence.

That night in our hotel room, Mark hung out with us for a few hours, eating an informal room service dinner and talking before he left. Our wedding came up.

"I want you to be my best man…obviously," I told Mark. He laughed.

"Yeah…I figured that. Thanks."

Amber was frowning and looked confused and sad. Mark asked her what was wrong, to which she replied, "Kane…I don't want you wearing a mask at the ceremony." Mark and I were both silent. My stomach was turning. She sighed. "Kane, I love you. And I want to marry you. And I am the one who loves you, and have to kiss you, not everyone else. And I'm not going to kiss that damn mask. I hate it, Kane, I really do. And I want to have a real wedding, and" –she had a small grin here- "I want to show our children wedding pictures. Real ones. I don't want them to see the dresses, the suits, the flowers, and then your red obnoxious mask sticking out."

I wanted to argue. I really did, but I couldn't think of what to say. Mark spoke. "She's got a point, Kane. And now that I think of that, too, I really think you should try going without the damn mask. I mean, in all seriousness, that mask is making you a coward. You're hiding. I know you, Kane. You wouldn't hide from anything else. So don't hide from this." He looked so incredibly sad. He always looked sad when he talked about my mask, or about the fire. I think the guilt he felt was greater than anything I've felt. It really wasn't his fault. It was Paul's fault. Ugh.

Mark kept talking. "C'mon, man. It's not like you'd have to wrestle in it or anything. But we're all friends. You owe it to me and Amber and all the guys. We're friends. We're all friends. It's good for you. And they would all be happy," he looked away from me, the sadness still in him. "I'm sure no one would care. Why would they? I mean, if they have a problem, fuck them. We already know each other. We're already friends. If they really give a fuck about how you look, then they're the assholes."

I sighed. "I…" no words came. I saw a little bit of a grin come onto his face. It was because he'd won. And he could tell that the reason I was speechless was because I knew he was right. And because I knew he was right I became somewhat annoyed and felt somewhat played. I could feel the scowl forming on my face. Amber giggled and crawled over and placed a kiss on my face.

"You're cute when you're mad," she said to me. I give in.

"Okay," my voice sounded very small and weak. Mark gave a little chuckle type thing before stretching.

"I'm gonna go get some sleep. I'll see you two in the morning."

Amber curled up next to me in a ball, lying on the bed with the lights still on. I put my arm around her. She yawned and slung her arm over my waist, pulling in closer to me and curling against me like you'd see a baby animal do to their mother.

"Where are we heading to for tomorrow?" she asked, half yawning. I ran my hand over her hair, loving the feeling of its silkiness.

"Dallas…I think," I told her. I began to think about my mask being off backstage, about how I would go about taking it off for the firs time. I really didn't want to. But If it was for Amber…

She stirred a little. "What's wrong?" What are you thinking about?" she asked me softly.

"Why?"

"Your heart just started pounding. You're nervous about something, aren't you? Are you okay?"

I sighed, and felt foolish when childish tears filled my eyes, a stubbornness at not wanting to do what I didn't want to. "I was thinking about the whole mask thing."

She lifted her head and looked at me, her hair tangles, one eyes half shut. She was half-asleep. "Kane, honey, is it bothering you that much?"

I felt a great relief with my hope that she would change her mind about the whole thing. "Yes. It bothers me a lot."

She frowned. "Kane, don't think I'm going to baby you. Get over yourself. You don't even look that bad, you just think that you do."

"Amber…" I protested. It sorta came out like a whine…or as much as a whine as I could make with my voice. "You don't understand…when I was little I didn't wear a mask and people laughed, and stared, and pointed, and called me a freak…I just…I don't feel comfortable with this. It doesn't feel right." She sat up and looked straight into my eyes.

"Kane, I'm not going to try and sound empathetic, because I will never feel what that felt like for you. But Mark is right; you can't just hide from it. It's being cowardly to do that. Why can't you come to terms with yourself and your past? Don't you realize that those people were assholes to do that to you? To a child? You have to believe me when I tell you that it isn't your fault. And those people didn't know you. What are you afraid of now? Steve, Mick, Shawn…they all know you. We're all friends. And if something so trivial as a few scares bothers them enough not to like you then, what Mark said, fuck them."

"A few scars?"

She looked at me scoldingly. "Kane…Kane Kane Kane," she smiled and planted a hand on my chest. "Yes a few scars. You take yourself way too seriously. What is so damn terrible about your face? So your cheeks and forehead are a little messed up. Big fuckin' deal. Be a man. Get over it. Jeez Kane."

We were both silent. I was again speechless as I always was when I'd been proven wrong. She pushed up and kissed me, and I kissed her back, before she slipped back down to where she had been sitting before and mumbled something about the light. I turned it off and got comfortable so that we could both sleep.

Like so many other nights we fall asleep, savoring each other's warmth and with warm, subconscious smiles on our faces, uncontrollable because we were both so happy.