Metal Gear Gas. (Second Part)
By: Alfa Ishida
Some hours later, Snake wakes up and notices that he has been captured into a weird torture machine. His naked torso revealed the "Love Mum" tattoo on his chest. Snake felt kinda dizzy, and couldn´t remember those dirty magazines the Genome Soldier mentioned... Perhaps he fell into a well-made trap...
Snake: Perhaps they weren´t as stupid as I thought...
In front of him were 3 shadows. One of them was Assholot, um, I mean Ocelot. Other one was Sniper Wolf, looking at him with a funny face and her fingers making an "L" on her forehead.. What was that suppossed to mean? And the last shadow was himself, with a very nasty-looking hippie hairdo.
Snake: What the hell!? I travelled trough time to my youth!? Gas: No, you idiot. Im Gas Snake, your long lost brother. Snake: Oh yeah, I remember you. You were that bastard who always took my lunch from... Gas: In fact, we did never meet before. I grew up in England... GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!! *fart* Snake: Yew...(Tries to cover his nose, but he can´t) Ocelot: It´s useless. This is my special pre-ordered Torturing Machine, just $56 at E-Bay. Snake: I should be getting one of these for Christmas... Gas: *fart* , let´s drop the stupidities.. We have captured you because we need your DNA. Snake: Sorry, dear. Im infected with AIDS, you cannot use my blood... Gas: *fart* OH SHIT!! *fart* THE PLAN HAS BEEN RUINED!! THROW HIM INTO THE CELL!!
Gas starts farting a lot, so Snake falls unconscious. Then a guard takes him into the prisoners cell. Snake wakes up again, this time inside the cell. He thanks God the fact that Ocelot forgot the torture scene. Snake sits in his bed, and somehow notices a weird smell inside the small room.
Snake: (Looks at DARPA Chief´s corpse) Looks like I have a roomate... At least he won´t steal my stuff like the roomate I had in the University... Hehe...
Then Snake receives a Codec call, so he crouches and answers.
Campbell: Snake, how are you?
Snake: Well, duh. I´ve been trapped by a bunch of dumbasses, who threw me into a cell with a decomposing corpse. Campbell: Kickass.. Sounds like a horror movie... Snake: It could have been... but Ocelot somehow forgot to torture me. Campbell: Luck of the devil, Snake. Don´t worry, you´ll find your way out. Snake: I hope so, or I´ll become just like my friend here. Campbell: By the way, Naomi wants to talk to you. Snake: What for?
Campbell: She wants to make sure that FoxDie is still wor.... Snake: FoxDie? What the heck is that? Campbell: (Cuts out his transmition and switches to Naomi)
Naomi: Snake! Tell me about your family. Snake: Why do you want to know that?
Naomi: Just making sure you have the potential to die by a heart attack. Snake: Oh, well.. It all began with my grandmother.. She was a huge woman... And she.. Naomi: Can we skip that part and go straight to your parents? Snake: Ok... There was a man who said he was my father.. Naomi: Who was it? Snake: Big - The Man - Boss.. Naomi: No! Don´t tell me! Snake: I already did, dumbass. Naomi: And who was your mother? Snake: Daddy told me about some Mrs. Laboratory... Or something like that... Naomi: So your real name is Solid Boss Laboratory? Snake: Perhaps. Naomi: Any friends? Snake: Cyborg Ninja looks kinda friendly. Naomi: I meant PAST FRIENDS, idiot. Snake: Oh, Francis W. Jaegerclesstessmockdeutchmanis ... A.K.A. "Frank Jaeger" Naomi: Grey Fox!? Snake: Yep.. By the way, I didn´t know that even medical staff can know about the real identities of FOXHOUND´s agents... Naomi: I went to a medium. That´s how I learned that. Snake: Allright... Now that I think about it.. That Cyborg Weirdo uses the same cologne that Francis used... Naomi: OH SHIT!!! (Cuts the transmition) Snake: What was that for....?
Snake walks around the cell for a while, and sees the inept guard outside fall asleep over and over again... Perhaps he was the same guy who prefers to crap his pants instead of flushing the toilet....? Searching for something to entertain himself, he asked the inept guard for some puzzle games or stuff. The guard gave him some Barney magazines with a LOT of stupid riddles and puzzles that even a 3 years-old kid could answer...
Snake: 3 letters word for "Giant star that shines in the sky at day".....? ...... What the heck..?
Snake waited a long time and eventually he got tired of those hard puzzles, so he called Otacon, that Videogame-freak....
Snake: Otacon? It´s me, Snake. Otacon: Eh? Wait a minute, Im in the middle of a fight with Bowser! Snake: Come on. Do you wanna be like a videogame hero? Otacon: Sure! What do I have to do? Snake: See, I´ve been captured by the terrorists, and they threw me into a cell. Otacon: ................? So? Snake: SO COME AND SAVE ME!! NUMBMINDED PIECE OF CRAP!!! Otacon: Ah! If you´re gonna curse like a sailor, then you can rot there in jail!
Mad at Snake, Otacon decided to cut out the transmition. Tired of the weird stuff happening in the game, Snake remembered his days in High School, when the local gang used to get him in the lockers in school.
Snake: (Has an idea) Hey, dumbass. Guard: Eh? Snake: I think my friend here (Points to the corpse) is feeling a little bad... Guard: Oh, I see... (Takes a look inside) Yeah.. he looks pretty bad.. Snake: If you let me out, I could bring him some medicine. Guard: Wow, smartass... (Opens the cell door)
Snake walks out the cell and picks up all of his equipment, then gets out of the torture room without a single scratch.
Snake: Now.. were can I find some medicine..? Nah, what the hell..
Snake manages to return to the point where the fight with Sniper Wolf took place, and now that nobody was there to stop him, he entered the first Comunication Tower. Suddenly, the alarm went off and a bunch of well-armed soldiers began to follow him. Snake had no option but to climb the stairs up.
Snake: (Still running) WHAT THE HELL?! ARE THESE THINGS ETERNAL?!
And so it looked, Snake ran about 3 hours before a light could be seen above him. When he reached it, he noticed that he was at the very begining of the course.
Snake: What is this?! Twilight Zone!?
Tired of those damned programers, Snake decided to act like NEO (From The Matrix) and he stepped on the elevator´s celing. Then he shot the metal cable with his SOCOM and he went up like a bullet. Finally he reached the end of the tower and he climbed a lader, he was now in the roof of the Tower. Suddenly, a giant UFO appeared in front of him, radiating a lot of light beams and stuff, to think about it, it looked like E.T.´s space ship...
Snake: Wow.... Gas: (Inside the UFO) *Fart* Hey Snake! Ill destroy you! Snake: No kidding this time!
Snake runs to the roof´s edge, and he realizes that there is no way out. Then he gets a call from Master Miller, who strangely is wearing an E.T. disguise.
Master: Snake, you should go back and get a rope from the bottom of the Tower! *Fart* Snake: Why, are you nuts!? I won´t enter that freaky world again! Master: *Fart* Then you can stand there and let ME.. I mean, Gas, kill you. Snake: Strange mistake you did there... Master: *Fart* Who cares? What are you gonna do? Snake: Just watch me.... Snake jumps over the edge and falls to the bridge connecting the two towers, apparently he was unharmed.
Master: *Fart* How did you do that?! THAT´S ABSOLUTELY IMPOSIBLE!! Snake: Not for a GameShark... Hehe... Master: *Fart* Mmh... Smart.... (Cuts out transmition)
Snake gets to tower 2, but just when he found an elevator, it was damaged. It looked like it was being hold down on purpose... Snake hears a strange noise, so he draws out his SOCOM and shoots to the place where the noises were coming from.
Otacon: (Wears off Camo) OH, HOLY SH*T!!! (His leg is bleeding) Snake: Oh, sorry there, Otacon. Otacon: (Raises middle finger) YOU KNOW IM A SISSY GIRL!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! Snake: Can you fix the elevator? It looks like it´s damaged. Otacon: Why sould I? Snake: Because I can give you the secret passwords of the Pentagon confidential system. Otacon: Really!? How did you obtain them?! Snake: It´s good having dad on the highest rank in the army, don´t you think? Otacon: You rule! I´ll fix the elevator in no time! Leave it to me! Snake: Kickass.. Now, do you know some tips to defeat a UFO? Otacon: (Takes out a briefcase) Use this, don´t open it before the fight. Snake: I hope it works, or you can forget those passwords. Otacon: Don´t worry... hehe...
Snake leaves Otacon and climbs to the roof of tower 2, and Gas appears again in his UFO.
Gas: *Fart* So! The Snake finally came out of his hole! Snake: Wow... that sounded pretty nasty... Gas: *Fart* SHUT UP BRO!! Snake: Why are you calling me bro!? Who the hell are you?! Gas: *Fart* I already told you, idiot! Snake: Sorry, I totally forgot... Gas: *Fart* Well. Ask the father that you killed!! I´ll send you to hell to meet him! Snake: What if he´s in purgatory? Gas: *Fart* Oh... well, that means you won´t be meeting him, then!! I´ll destroy you anyway! Snake: But I really gotta know who you are! Gas: Ok! "Im you, Im your shadow"!!!! Snake: (Looks at his own shadow) No, it is here, right behind me... Gas: DDIIIEEEEE!!!! *FAAAARRRRRTTTTT!!!!*
Gas begins to shoot lasers at Snake, who takes out the briefcase Otacon gave him and opens it. Inside was a giant gun, like a replica of the weapons used in Men in Black... Snake points the giant weapon at the UFO and shoots. The UFO is destroyed and falls to the darkness below.
Snake: Kickass...
Snake returns to the elevator, that has been fixed by Otacon. Snake enters the elevator, but it´s still not working.
Snake: Oh crap... Looks like that Otasshole did´t do anything...
Suddenly, the elevator door closes and Snake receives a Codec call from Otacon..
Otacon: Snake, I returned to my lab so I could get a Stealth camo for you. Snake: Cool! Now I can pass trough the game unnoticed! Otacon: Eh.. but there´s a problem you see.. I had 5 prototypes in my lab, so Im wearing one. That leaves four, right? Snake: (Takes out calculator) Yeah... I think so... Otacon: Well, those 4 prototypes were stolen! Or perhaps they went on and now are invisible.. who knows?
Snake: You are not gonna believe it, but I can smell like man´s sweat here... Otacon: Use deodorant... Snake: No, not mine, I know how my smell is... Otacon: OH NO!! THAT MEANS THE GUYS WHO STOLE MY PROTOTYPES ARE IN THERE WITH YOU!!! Snake: GODAMMIT!!! Invisible Soldier: To late Snake! Now die!!
The four soldiers begin shooting, but since no one can see each other, they end killing themselves in the confusion.
Snake: Oh man.. come on... (Slaps forehead)
Snake finally reaches the first floor of tower 2. Then he gets out and steps into a snow field. Then he gets a Codec call from Sniper Wolf, who apparently asked Master Miller for Snake´s frequency...
Sniper Wolf: Snake, Im near... Can you sense me near you? Snake: (Looks around and notices that Wolf is right next to him) Eh... yeah... Sniper Wolf: Then let´s fight, my little prey...
Wolf runs to the other side of the snow field and begins shooting with her PSG-1. Snake hides behind a snow man and calls Otacon..
Snake: Otacon! Do you have another Stealth camo? Aside of the stolen ones? Otacon: Duh! I told you I only had 5! Why didn´t you take one from the corpses of the soldiers?! Snake: Oh.. didn´t think about that... Otacon: Are you fighting Wolf!? SNAKE!! PLEASE DON´T KILL HER!! Snake: Why?! Otacon: Because she still owes me 30 bucks!! Please! Let her live! Snake: Are you insane!? Otacon: Ok, do what u want... But be sure to get 30 bucks from her corpse. Snake: (Sigh) Ok... ok....
Snake takes out his Men in Black weapon and shoots at Sniper Wolf, destroying her body and leaving her head still alive. Then he gets there and realizes that Wolf was really a cyborg.
Snake: Wow, that explains the super-hard skin... Wolf: Snake.. I waited for someone to kill me.
Snake: Weird, that is the same thing I said in my first visit to the dentist... Wolf: No, really... I was a kurd... I grew up in the battlefield.. Snake: (Yawns) Wolf: Day by day, I woke up in the morning with a corpse by my side.. Snake: Nasty... Wolf: Are you Saladin...?
Snake: ALADDIN?! WHAT THE HECK?! (Points gun at Wolf´s head)
Then Otacon appears, wearing off his Stealth camo.
Otacon: No!!! Snake: ........ Otacon: NNOOO!!!! Snake: (Shoots and destroys Wolf´s head) Otacon: NNNOOOOOO!!!!! MY 30 BUCKS!! HOW COULD YOU?! Snake: Come on man... It´s not that much... Otacon: But I was gonna buy Saint Seiya´s Hades OVA with that money!! Snake: Gimme a break... Otacon: WHAT ARE YOU FIGHTING FOR?! WHY WAS SHE FIGHTING FOR?! WHO KILLED KENNEDY!? ARE MC DONALD´S HAMBURGUERS REAL HAMBURGUERS?! WHY DO THEY TASTE LIKE TOILET PAPER?! Snake: If we make trough this, I´ll tell ya... (Walks away)
Otacon: Ok! I´ll be at my lab playing Metal Gear Solid!! (Goes away)
Snake enters a small warehouse, and looks down to the basement...
PLEASE INSERT DISK 2
By: Alfa Ishida
Some hours later, Snake wakes up and notices that he has been captured into a weird torture machine. His naked torso revealed the "Love Mum" tattoo on his chest. Snake felt kinda dizzy, and couldn´t remember those dirty magazines the Genome Soldier mentioned... Perhaps he fell into a well-made trap...
Snake: Perhaps they weren´t as stupid as I thought...
In front of him were 3 shadows. One of them was Assholot, um, I mean Ocelot. Other one was Sniper Wolf, looking at him with a funny face and her fingers making an "L" on her forehead.. What was that suppossed to mean? And the last shadow was himself, with a very nasty-looking hippie hairdo.
Snake: What the hell!? I travelled trough time to my youth!? Gas: No, you idiot. Im Gas Snake, your long lost brother. Snake: Oh yeah, I remember you. You were that bastard who always took my lunch from... Gas: In fact, we did never meet before. I grew up in England... GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!! *fart* Snake: Yew...(Tries to cover his nose, but he can´t) Ocelot: It´s useless. This is my special pre-ordered Torturing Machine, just $56 at E-Bay. Snake: I should be getting one of these for Christmas... Gas: *fart* , let´s drop the stupidities.. We have captured you because we need your DNA. Snake: Sorry, dear. Im infected with AIDS, you cannot use my blood... Gas: *fart* OH SHIT!! *fart* THE PLAN HAS BEEN RUINED!! THROW HIM INTO THE CELL!!
Gas starts farting a lot, so Snake falls unconscious. Then a guard takes him into the prisoners cell. Snake wakes up again, this time inside the cell. He thanks God the fact that Ocelot forgot the torture scene. Snake sits in his bed, and somehow notices a weird smell inside the small room.
Snake: (Looks at DARPA Chief´s corpse) Looks like I have a roomate... At least he won´t steal my stuff like the roomate I had in the University... Hehe...
Then Snake receives a Codec call, so he crouches and answers.
Campbell: Snake, how are you?
Snake: Well, duh. I´ve been trapped by a bunch of dumbasses, who threw me into a cell with a decomposing corpse. Campbell: Kickass.. Sounds like a horror movie... Snake: It could have been... but Ocelot somehow forgot to torture me. Campbell: Luck of the devil, Snake. Don´t worry, you´ll find your way out. Snake: I hope so, or I´ll become just like my friend here. Campbell: By the way, Naomi wants to talk to you. Snake: What for?
Campbell: She wants to make sure that FoxDie is still wor.... Snake: FoxDie? What the heck is that? Campbell: (Cuts out his transmition and switches to Naomi)
Naomi: Snake! Tell me about your family. Snake: Why do you want to know that?
Naomi: Just making sure you have the potential to die by a heart attack. Snake: Oh, well.. It all began with my grandmother.. She was a huge woman... And she.. Naomi: Can we skip that part and go straight to your parents? Snake: Ok... There was a man who said he was my father.. Naomi: Who was it? Snake: Big - The Man - Boss.. Naomi: No! Don´t tell me! Snake: I already did, dumbass. Naomi: And who was your mother? Snake: Daddy told me about some Mrs. Laboratory... Or something like that... Naomi: So your real name is Solid Boss Laboratory? Snake: Perhaps. Naomi: Any friends? Snake: Cyborg Ninja looks kinda friendly. Naomi: I meant PAST FRIENDS, idiot. Snake: Oh, Francis W. Jaegerclesstessmockdeutchmanis ... A.K.A. "Frank Jaeger" Naomi: Grey Fox!? Snake: Yep.. By the way, I didn´t know that even medical staff can know about the real identities of FOXHOUND´s agents... Naomi: I went to a medium. That´s how I learned that. Snake: Allright... Now that I think about it.. That Cyborg Weirdo uses the same cologne that Francis used... Naomi: OH SHIT!!! (Cuts the transmition) Snake: What was that for....?
Snake walks around the cell for a while, and sees the inept guard outside fall asleep over and over again... Perhaps he was the same guy who prefers to crap his pants instead of flushing the toilet....? Searching for something to entertain himself, he asked the inept guard for some puzzle games or stuff. The guard gave him some Barney magazines with a LOT of stupid riddles and puzzles that even a 3 years-old kid could answer...
Snake: 3 letters word for "Giant star that shines in the sky at day".....? ...... What the heck..?
Snake waited a long time and eventually he got tired of those hard puzzles, so he called Otacon, that Videogame-freak....
Snake: Otacon? It´s me, Snake. Otacon: Eh? Wait a minute, Im in the middle of a fight with Bowser! Snake: Come on. Do you wanna be like a videogame hero? Otacon: Sure! What do I have to do? Snake: See, I´ve been captured by the terrorists, and they threw me into a cell. Otacon: ................? So? Snake: SO COME AND SAVE ME!! NUMBMINDED PIECE OF CRAP!!! Otacon: Ah! If you´re gonna curse like a sailor, then you can rot there in jail!
Mad at Snake, Otacon decided to cut out the transmition. Tired of the weird stuff happening in the game, Snake remembered his days in High School, when the local gang used to get him in the lockers in school.
Snake: (Has an idea) Hey, dumbass. Guard: Eh? Snake: I think my friend here (Points to the corpse) is feeling a little bad... Guard: Oh, I see... (Takes a look inside) Yeah.. he looks pretty bad.. Snake: If you let me out, I could bring him some medicine. Guard: Wow, smartass... (Opens the cell door)
Snake walks out the cell and picks up all of his equipment, then gets out of the torture room without a single scratch.
Snake: Now.. were can I find some medicine..? Nah, what the hell..
Snake manages to return to the point where the fight with Sniper Wolf took place, and now that nobody was there to stop him, he entered the first Comunication Tower. Suddenly, the alarm went off and a bunch of well-armed soldiers began to follow him. Snake had no option but to climb the stairs up.
Snake: (Still running) WHAT THE HELL?! ARE THESE THINGS ETERNAL?!
And so it looked, Snake ran about 3 hours before a light could be seen above him. When he reached it, he noticed that he was at the very begining of the course.
Snake: What is this?! Twilight Zone!?
Tired of those damned programers, Snake decided to act like NEO (From The Matrix) and he stepped on the elevator´s celing. Then he shot the metal cable with his SOCOM and he went up like a bullet. Finally he reached the end of the tower and he climbed a lader, he was now in the roof of the Tower. Suddenly, a giant UFO appeared in front of him, radiating a lot of light beams and stuff, to think about it, it looked like E.T.´s space ship...
Snake: Wow.... Gas: (Inside the UFO) *Fart* Hey Snake! Ill destroy you! Snake: No kidding this time!
Snake runs to the roof´s edge, and he realizes that there is no way out. Then he gets a call from Master Miller, who strangely is wearing an E.T. disguise.
Master: Snake, you should go back and get a rope from the bottom of the Tower! *Fart* Snake: Why, are you nuts!? I won´t enter that freaky world again! Master: *Fart* Then you can stand there and let ME.. I mean, Gas, kill you. Snake: Strange mistake you did there... Master: *Fart* Who cares? What are you gonna do? Snake: Just watch me.... Snake jumps over the edge and falls to the bridge connecting the two towers, apparently he was unharmed.
Master: *Fart* How did you do that?! THAT´S ABSOLUTELY IMPOSIBLE!! Snake: Not for a GameShark... Hehe... Master: *Fart* Mmh... Smart.... (Cuts out transmition)
Snake gets to tower 2, but just when he found an elevator, it was damaged. It looked like it was being hold down on purpose... Snake hears a strange noise, so he draws out his SOCOM and shoots to the place where the noises were coming from.
Otacon: (Wears off Camo) OH, HOLY SH*T!!! (His leg is bleeding) Snake: Oh, sorry there, Otacon. Otacon: (Raises middle finger) YOU KNOW IM A SISSY GIRL!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! Snake: Can you fix the elevator? It looks like it´s damaged. Otacon: Why sould I? Snake: Because I can give you the secret passwords of the Pentagon confidential system. Otacon: Really!? How did you obtain them?! Snake: It´s good having dad on the highest rank in the army, don´t you think? Otacon: You rule! I´ll fix the elevator in no time! Leave it to me! Snake: Kickass.. Now, do you know some tips to defeat a UFO? Otacon: (Takes out a briefcase) Use this, don´t open it before the fight. Snake: I hope it works, or you can forget those passwords. Otacon: Don´t worry... hehe...
Snake leaves Otacon and climbs to the roof of tower 2, and Gas appears again in his UFO.
Gas: *Fart* So! The Snake finally came out of his hole! Snake: Wow... that sounded pretty nasty... Gas: *Fart* SHUT UP BRO!! Snake: Why are you calling me bro!? Who the hell are you?! Gas: *Fart* I already told you, idiot! Snake: Sorry, I totally forgot... Gas: *Fart* Well. Ask the father that you killed!! I´ll send you to hell to meet him! Snake: What if he´s in purgatory? Gas: *Fart* Oh... well, that means you won´t be meeting him, then!! I´ll destroy you anyway! Snake: But I really gotta know who you are! Gas: Ok! "Im you, Im your shadow"!!!! Snake: (Looks at his own shadow) No, it is here, right behind me... Gas: DDIIIEEEEE!!!! *FAAAARRRRRTTTTT!!!!*
Gas begins to shoot lasers at Snake, who takes out the briefcase Otacon gave him and opens it. Inside was a giant gun, like a replica of the weapons used in Men in Black... Snake points the giant weapon at the UFO and shoots. The UFO is destroyed and falls to the darkness below.
Snake: Kickass...
Snake returns to the elevator, that has been fixed by Otacon. Snake enters the elevator, but it´s still not working.
Snake: Oh crap... Looks like that Otasshole did´t do anything...
Suddenly, the elevator door closes and Snake receives a Codec call from Otacon..
Otacon: Snake, I returned to my lab so I could get a Stealth camo for you. Snake: Cool! Now I can pass trough the game unnoticed! Otacon: Eh.. but there´s a problem you see.. I had 5 prototypes in my lab, so Im wearing one. That leaves four, right? Snake: (Takes out calculator) Yeah... I think so... Otacon: Well, those 4 prototypes were stolen! Or perhaps they went on and now are invisible.. who knows?
Snake: You are not gonna believe it, but I can smell like man´s sweat here... Otacon: Use deodorant... Snake: No, not mine, I know how my smell is... Otacon: OH NO!! THAT MEANS THE GUYS WHO STOLE MY PROTOTYPES ARE IN THERE WITH YOU!!! Snake: GODAMMIT!!! Invisible Soldier: To late Snake! Now die!!
The four soldiers begin shooting, but since no one can see each other, they end killing themselves in the confusion.
Snake: Oh man.. come on... (Slaps forehead)
Snake finally reaches the first floor of tower 2. Then he gets out and steps into a snow field. Then he gets a Codec call from Sniper Wolf, who apparently asked Master Miller for Snake´s frequency...
Sniper Wolf: Snake, Im near... Can you sense me near you? Snake: (Looks around and notices that Wolf is right next to him) Eh... yeah... Sniper Wolf: Then let´s fight, my little prey...
Wolf runs to the other side of the snow field and begins shooting with her PSG-1. Snake hides behind a snow man and calls Otacon..
Snake: Otacon! Do you have another Stealth camo? Aside of the stolen ones? Otacon: Duh! I told you I only had 5! Why didn´t you take one from the corpses of the soldiers?! Snake: Oh.. didn´t think about that... Otacon: Are you fighting Wolf!? SNAKE!! PLEASE DON´T KILL HER!! Snake: Why?! Otacon: Because she still owes me 30 bucks!! Please! Let her live! Snake: Are you insane!? Otacon: Ok, do what u want... But be sure to get 30 bucks from her corpse. Snake: (Sigh) Ok... ok....
Snake takes out his Men in Black weapon and shoots at Sniper Wolf, destroying her body and leaving her head still alive. Then he gets there and realizes that Wolf was really a cyborg.
Snake: Wow, that explains the super-hard skin... Wolf: Snake.. I waited for someone to kill me.
Snake: Weird, that is the same thing I said in my first visit to the dentist... Wolf: No, really... I was a kurd... I grew up in the battlefield.. Snake: (Yawns) Wolf: Day by day, I woke up in the morning with a corpse by my side.. Snake: Nasty... Wolf: Are you Saladin...?
Snake: ALADDIN?! WHAT THE HECK?! (Points gun at Wolf´s head)
Then Otacon appears, wearing off his Stealth camo.
Otacon: No!!! Snake: ........ Otacon: NNOOO!!!! Snake: (Shoots and destroys Wolf´s head) Otacon: NNNOOOOOO!!!!! MY 30 BUCKS!! HOW COULD YOU?! Snake: Come on man... It´s not that much... Otacon: But I was gonna buy Saint Seiya´s Hades OVA with that money!! Snake: Gimme a break... Otacon: WHAT ARE YOU FIGHTING FOR?! WHY WAS SHE FIGHTING FOR?! WHO KILLED KENNEDY!? ARE MC DONALD´S HAMBURGUERS REAL HAMBURGUERS?! WHY DO THEY TASTE LIKE TOILET PAPER?! Snake: If we make trough this, I´ll tell ya... (Walks away)
Otacon: Ok! I´ll be at my lab playing Metal Gear Solid!! (Goes away)
Snake enters a small warehouse, and looks down to the basement...
PLEASE INSERT DISK 2