Memory Tainted

by Syra Saleh

When another mysterious Defense teacher comes to Hogwarts, Severus takes it upon himself to monitor her every move. Very soon, he finds this sarcastic and witty teacher to be something other than what he expected... an equal. AN.

7. The Problem with Secrets

Author's Note: TADA!!! It's here! The moment you've all been waiting for! Aren't you happy?! I know this took forever and a half to put out, but hopefully its length makes up for something… the thing is 31 pages on Word. Sheesh, they wouldn't shut up. You might want to go back and reread the last chapter's ending just to refresh your patient memories.

I want to warn you right now, right very now, that this is one of my most controversial chapters. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. It's not rated R, I would say it's still PG-13, but it toes the line and I don't want anyone coming to me complaining that I've corrupted your mind. You're here, aren't you? Isn't that corrupted enough? We've got the usual language, violence, and slight adult content. Just like last time except sort of turned up a notch. Ok, that's my speech.

As always, I don't own anyone except Cassi, Simon, and Her (who we can now refer to as Anya…the pieces of the puzzle start falling into place). The rest belong to JK Rowling, the literary genius. And I'm not making money off this either. Psh, like this would make me money…

Read and review or I'll hold the next chapter hostage! :D Kidding, of course, because I have a feeling you would skin me alive if I did that, but do review, I love reviews! Thank you, enjoy the chapter, email me if you want to! Have fun!

Chapter 7: The Problem with Secrets

10:50, time to go to the Defense meeting. Cassi shut her grade book, replaced her quill and sealed her inkpot, then locked up her classroom and headed down the dark hallways. The only source of light in the dark corridors was the weak beams of light from the quarter moon shining through the large windows, painting the portraits and suits of armor along the walls of the hallway with their silvery white light. She was quite eager to see what sort of state Severus was in, especially since she left him on such odd terms. Quite pleased with how that had turned out, she smiled to herself. The smile quickly faded though as she stopped, listening for footsteps. However, there was nothing to be heard, so she continued walking, senses alert. Within a few steps, she got the feeling she was being followed, and in a few more steps…

"Cassi? Where are you going?" called a familiar voice. Fretting slightly, she turned around and faced him. Oh, just Simon.

"I was just…going to see Dumbledore," she half lied. He nodded and stared down at his feet as he came to a stop in front of her. "What ah, what are you doing up so late?" Her inquiry was made to sound light, but she was seriously curious.

"I was walking. I couldn't sleep," Simon replied shyly. Cassi was about to nod, when she noticed something.

"Were you going outside too?" she asked, gently touching his traveling cloak. He nodded again. There's nothing wrong with going outside when you can't sleep, she thought to herself. "It's rather cold, don't get sick."

He caught her hand up and looked her in the eye. "Hey, are you ok? You've been acting strangely lately." His blue eyes were alight with concern

"I've just been in an odd mood, it's nothing important." She sounded very reassuring, though not entirely honest.

"Alright, if you say so," he said, still looking right through her it seemed. He kissed her hand, winked, and went on his way, the click of his shoes against the floor fading away. She took two steps to go about her ways when a deep voice hissed at her.

"And what, pray tell, was that about?" came the angry reply from a dark corner near her. She jumped and whirled around, then placed a hand over her heart as Severus emerged from the shadows, dark and tall. His eyes were glittering slits of envy. Her slight panic lessened.

She smiled slightly to herself, then put a hand on her hip. "Have you sunk so low as to spy on me?"

"Yes," he hissed, "and apparently you need spying on. Secret night rendezvous with Harper?"

"We didn't plan it, he was going for a walk." She became quite curious when he suddenly glanced down the hall and a look of serious concern crossed his face fleetingly. It cleared quickly though and he returned his harsh gaze to her eyes. "What would you like me to say, Severus? Yes, I'm having a passionate love affair with the Muggle Studies professor?" He visibly tensed, and grabbed her wrist up, pulling her to him, something he did quite often but it always sent shivers up her spine and he knew that.

"Are you just purposely trying to make me jealous?" he asked crossly, eyes narrowing.

"Yes, now do not spy on me again."

"Innocent people have nothing to hide."

"Severus, you're such a prat sometimes. A prat with no reason to be jealous," she said while breaking his grasp and sliding her arms loosely around his neck. He relaxed slightly, and she kissed him.

"You do realize that we are in the middle of a hallway," he whispered to her.

"It's dark," she justified. She laughed softly and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of his arms around her.

"Cassi…" he started, and she peered up at him curiously.

"Yes?"

"…we're going to be late for the meeting," he finished quietly and lamely, and she knew that he had not said what he meant, but she nodded and let go. They walked with each other down the hall silently until they were almost to the gargoyle.

She smiled coyly at him and asked, "Do you think Sirius will be there?"

"He was there last time, the git! He better not be…" he said with a scowl. Cassi smirked and whispered the password to the gargoyle, then stepped through the doorway, down the hall and into Dumbledore's office. There were already a few people there, and they watched both Cassi and Snape walk in. Snape folded his arms and found a seat far away from an older, tired looking man with sandy color hair, the only other one actually seated, as the others were standing.

The man stood and caught her attention before she sat down near Severus, and she stood behind her chair and waited for him to walk to her.

"Are you Cassandra?" he asked quietly, with a firm yet tired tone. On closer inspection, he was not any older than Severus was if she had to guess, but extremely tired. She nodded. "Hello, I'm Remus Lupin, I work with Sirius. I believe you've met him." He smiled at this and offered his hand, and she shook it. Snape was sitting in his chair darkly, arms crossed and eyes trained on something far away. "Yes, well, he asked me to give you this." He offered her a small slip of parchment from his pocket, and she took it and read the markings on it.

She grinned widely and pocketed the parchment. "Thank you," she said to Remus.

"Sirius said I'm to flirt shamelessly with you, but I think I will let him take care of that," said Lupin with a grin, running his fingers through his sandy hair that was streaked with gray.

"That sounds like him," she said with a smile. There was a slight pause as they shook their heads with a smile, thinking about Sirius.

"Ah, Lupin. You're back," said Severus finally with a sneer, looking up from his tunneled vision.

"Snape," he said coldly, though it was intended to be a greeting. Remus returned his attention to Cassi and dismissed himself, saying that it was nice to meet her. He returned to his seat quickly and she sat down next to Severus.

"Let me guess, he is Sirius' close friend from school and you hate him through association," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Not quite. I have a reason to hate him. He nearly killed me when I was sixteen," Severus said, dropping his voice to a low whisper and venom dripping from every word. Surprised, she was about to ask the details when Dumbledore appeared at the door.

"Sorry for being late, I had to round up our last few members. Not to worry, they're not completely frozen," he said with a chuckle at a few people followed him in, look particularly cold. They took seats randomly around the table, and Dumbledore clapped his hands together once and announced, "Let's begin!"

~

Harry had walked back to the Gryffindor Commons deep in thought. Having just emerged from his detentions in the dungeons, he felt he had gone in empty handed and come out with a priceless treasure. Now how to spend the treasure was his dilemma…

Morals or revenge, revenge or morals? On one hand he had been given a gift, he had the most personal thing a person could know about someone, on the other, he had been burdened with it. Snape deserved for this to be printed in papers and spread across the school faster than the blink of an eye. But did Talin?

"No," he whispered to himself. She had saved him from Snape's wrath more than once, and this was as much about her as it was him. He considered this as he walked. Snape needed a taste of his own medicine; he needed to know what it felt like to be at someone else's mercy. But morally, it was wrong. "It's just wrong all around!"

He would have never suspected them. Never. They fought continually, people were betting on who would win their big fight, which was sworn to be soon. They argued, bickered, snapped, and smirked, other teachers had to tell them to stop in the presence of the children. They had the arguing in public down to an art. This was unreal to him, and more than once did he doubt what he saw. Yet he had seen it, in much too much detail. He began to wonder how long this had gone on, it was clearly evident that this was nothing new to them. A month? Two? How was he to tell? Façades were obviously something both were good at, for they had over one thousand people fooled. He wondered if anyone else knew…

Harry found his feet had led him straight to the portrait of the Fat Lady, snoozing comfortably.

"Ocean potion," he said loudly, trying to catch the portrait's attention. Startled, she sat up, peering around, then upon spying him, swung open. He stepped through it and found himself in the familiar Common room, and he sighed. Hermione and Ron were waiting up for him, Hermione reading on the couch and Ron sorting his cards from his Chocolate Frogs on his knee in his chair by the fireside.

"Harry, you're back early! How did it…" asked Hermione, but her question died as she caught the look of concentration on Harry's face. "What happened?!"

"What did Snape do this time?" asked Ron. Harry walked silently over to a chair across from Ron and looked pensive. He ought to tell them; Snape had crossed the lines with Ron and Hermione one too many times for him not to. He nodded once and tried to figure out how to word this, but only managed to shake his head.

"Guessing game time!" Ron said playfully, and he sat up more attentively, cards abandoned in his lap. "Alright, let's see… it happened while you were at detention?" He peered over at Harry intently, who nodded again.

"Did he say something?"

"No."

"Hmm, a first, usually it's him shooting off his big mouth. Hmm, was it something he did?"

"More or less… what's the one thing you can't imagine Snape doing?"

Ron's face split into a wide grin. "I knew it! He was hopping around in a bunny suit, wasn't he?" Hermione dissolved into giggles, and Harry grinned too.

"Not quite Ron. About the same level of surprise, but I don't think he's going to be pretending to be a rabbit anytime soon." Harry laughed quietly to himself.

"I dunno then, I give up. You have any ideas Hermione?" asked Ron, quite curious by now and very eager to get it out of Harry.

"Well… no. I don't even try to understand Snape. He may be a very worthy professor, but he's a horrible person," she said firmly, and she touched her mouth with her hand, obviously remembering the comments he made about her teeth when they were elongated in her fourth year.

"No doubt about that. Ok, well, I didn't really expect you to guess anyway, it's too weird to guess. Alright, but you must promise not to tell anyone because I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet," he said quickly, dropping his voice. The others leaned closer to him, intent on hearing this. "I was in the dungeon, splicing serpents tongues when Professor Talin came in and pulled Snape out into the hallway… and, well, the door is crooked on the hinges and I was done…"

"You spied on them? Harry, if you had been caught!" came Hermione's horrified reply.

"I know, I know, but I didn't. …Ron, do you still have three Sickles on Talin for the fight?" asked Harry. Ron nodded, confused. "You better pull your bets, because I don't think we'll see them fighting anytime soon." Now Harry was having a bit of fun with this, fulfilling a small portion of his revenge on Snape. Vengeance is sweet, he thought.

"What do you mean? They always fight; it's a matter of time. And I'm pretty sure she could knock him out before he even kne-" began Ron, but he stopped mid-sentence and stared hard at Harry. "Harry, wait wait wait. Let's go over this one more time. You were spying on them in the hallway, and you don't think the fight is going to happen because…?" He left his question open, and silence filled the room. Then Ron started laughing, and continued to do so for a very long time. He fell out of his chair, cards scattering over the floor, howling with laughter. Harry was now finding it very funny indeed, and was having problems not laughing out himself. Hermione just gave them both very odd looks.

Finally, Ron calmed down enough to lie on the floor and breathe a bit more normally. "You have GOT to be kidding me, Harry! Tell me you're joking! Those two?!"

"I'm not lying, Ron."

"An ugly git like him? Snape? Are we thinking of the same person?"

"How many other Snapes do you know?"

"None. That is so impossible! Are you sure you don't need your glasses checked?"

"Ron! I swear I saw it correctly! I'm just as stumped as you are…"

Hermione stood up at this point, frustrated. "Could you two please tell me what's going on? I think I missed the punch line to the joke," she said hotly, glaring at the two boys.

"Hermione, I think Harry caught Snape and Talin…" began Ron, but he dissolved into gales of laughter, tears soon pouring down his face.

"Snogging," Harry filled in for him. Hermione's eyes went round and she sat back down.

"Oh," she said quietly in shock. After a few stunned seconds of silence, all three burst into laughter, laughing until they were all crying. It was a wonder no one heard them they were laughing so loud, it echoed off the stone walls and reverberated around the room. The laughter would die down and they would look at each other and in unison think "Snape…snogging…" and it would start back up again.

"I don't know what you're going to do about this, but it better be good!" Hermione finally managed.

"I'll figure out what to do soon enough," Harry said, sighing in an attempt to settle down. He stared into the fire flickering in the fireplace, examining his situation. He'd decide tomorrow what to do.

~

"Therefore, I need everyone to please keep aware. The silence of the Dark side will be over one day, and we need to be ready for it," ended Dumbledore in a sobering tone, and everyone in the Defense meeting nodded and stood. They milled around for a few minutes, just chatting generally. Cassi was hanging back, trying to keep her distance from Snape (she didn't want it to be so obvious), and watching everyone discuss the meeting. Severus stayed in his chair, glaring menacingly at the wall across from him. Lupin looked slightly uncomfortable across the table, and stood to leave shortly after the meeting was dismissed.

As he was exiting the door, Snape hissed, "Full moon in a week, Lupin." Lupin's shoulders slumped slightly and he looked very tired, but his eyes flashed with anger and he opened his mouth to speak, then snapped it shut. Cassi shot Severus a glare as soon as Lupin left, and he glared back. She then rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, exasperated with certain people's cruelty. He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, frustrated with her ability to side with his enemies merely because they have something against him.

"I'm going to go now," she said, and was out of the room before he could say anything, stalking down the dark hall with her arms still folded. Her shoes made lonely pattering sounds as she wandered down the halls, nearing her room. As she turned to walk down her classroom's corridor, she nearly ran into someone.

"Dammit Severus! Stop popping up from no where!" she exclaimed. "How did you get in front of me?"

"I know my way around," Severus said nonchalantly. She tried to walk around him to get to her classroom but he held out an arm and caught her, pulling her into his arms, holding her back to his chest and locking her in front of him with arms around her body. "I don't think so. You are a very difficult thing to understand, do you know that? One moment I can't pry you off me with all the magic I posses, the next you're attempting to make me jealous, and then you pretend I don't exist. I believe it was you who said you were not a pet to be toyed with?" He whispered all this in her ear softly, and she was closing her eyes, listening.

"What can I say? I'm fickle," she said, opening her eyes and looking up at him, blinking sweetly.

"That's pathetically cute," he sneered, and she smiled. He looked down at her for a moment, taking in the image of her in his arms, smiling up at him. It nearly startled him what a drastic change had come over her, even from the weeks before. Two months ago she was a shell of a witch, both emotionally and physically, and now she was nearly unrecognizable as the former deathly sick and empty person she once was. What still amazed him (and he noted this quite often in the same confused manner) was still the fact that another person could mean so much to him and care so much for him. It scared him at times to have that kind of bond with another, he had protected against it for so long that it was second nature to shun people. If you loved no one, no one could hurt you. But this was out of his control, a fearful thrill to him.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, leaning her head back on his shoulder.

"My thoughts are my own," he replied simply, and kissed her temple softly, trailing kisses down her cheek and coming to her neck. She paused, letting him continue out until he reached the neckline of her robes. Kisses evolved into small bites, and her heart beat out of control when she felt a hand drop to her hip, fingers playing across her hip bone. He slipped a hand into her pocket and procured the slip of paper from Sirius.

"Damn him! It's in Russian!" he whispered to her neck, still holding her to him as he looked at the paper.

She laughed and snatched the paper from, slipping it into her other pocket. "What did I tell you about being jealous, eh? It doesn't say anything threatening, Professor Snape, and we'll leave it at that. Honestly, you're so protective."

"It's not like I can help it with mongrels like Black about," he sighed.

She laughed. "Come see me tomorrow at break?"

"Fine, fine," he drawled tiredly. She leaned forward and kissed him softly, prolonging it slightly.

"Then you can tell me what your problem with Lupin is, besides the fact that he's a werewolf," she said, and she winked at him and walked past him. "I'm not the Defense teacher for nothing, Severus!" she called down the hallway, and disappeared into her classroom. He shook his head and headed down to his hallowed dungeons.

The next morning, Cassi jerked awake just before the sun was beginning to rise. Sitting up, she drew her knees to her chest, trying not to think about the dream she had just had as she stared out the window. More blood, more screams and pleads, and those icy hands had now driven themselves into her nightmares. And there was something else now, dark figures in robes and low murmurs, making the dream all the more horrifying.

"You'd think I'd be used to it by now," she said to herself, and she swung her legs over the bedside and got dressed. When she had set down her brush with the last stroke of her hair, she ran her fingers through her hair, and looked into the mirror. She noticed a light pink mark on her neckline when her robes were skewed, and she smirked. He can pay later… She straightened her robes and let a lock of hair fall over her shoulder, just in case. With this, she picked up her grade book and left. As soon as she had shut the door in her office, she set down her book at her desk and recorded a few of the homework assignments, working placidly in the silence. When she had the last grade down, she shut her book and headed off to breakfast. Snape was, of course, already there, but took no notice of her. She had expected this type of reception, and silently continued through breakfast, only eating a roll and a few slices of fruit.

"Don't even think about it, Snape," she commented while grabbing a slice of apple, eyes never leaving it. He shut his mouth, which had been formerly open to make a comment on the lack of meat in her diet.

"You assume too much," he murmured, and finished in silence. She smiled and watched him leave, then went back to her food, counting the hours until break. It amazed her how much she looked forward to seeing him, when it was only two months ago that she would have rather shoved him into a closet and locked him there than merely converse with him. And he was probably the reason she was still in existence today. But it wasn't only gratitude she felt towards him, it was something very different, something much deeper…

She shook her head and finished her meal, wondering how far she'd let her mind wander about him.

Her first class was Gryffindor fifth years today, and she had bookwork planned for them today instead of the usual hands-on projects. Like normal, she waited for them perched on her stool, sitting stiff-backed and emotionlessly, watching them file in. She noted that the infamous trio of Harry and company skirted her today, keeping very close together and talking very quietly. She wondered what was going on, but dismissed it as something trivial and did not think about it after that. The bell rang, she called role, and then wrote the assignment on the board, much to the dismay of her students, who hated her lengthy bookwork. When she was done, she settled down in her desk and continued on her grading, which seemed to be a never-ending cycle. The only sound in the room was quill tips scratching on the parchment and the occasional flipping of pages. This tranquility continued until the end of the period when the bell rang when a scraping of chair arose, and the rustling of bags and books prevailed. Only one more class…

"Only one more insolent class," growled Snape to himself as he flipped through his notes quickly. He began to scribble the directions for the potion they were making today on the board, not going to waste time going through the notes with them, they can read just like anyone else can. The fifth year Gryffindors drudged in, reluctantly setting up their cauldrons as Snape finished with the instructions.

"Set this up, it's a simple potion, even a group like you shouldn't have problems with this," he barked to them once the bell rang. They shifted uneasily. "I'll be coming around to check your potions at the end of the hour for a quiz grade. Well, what are you waiting for? Begin!" With this, he stalked over to his desk in the corner and went over the role. He didn't have to call names, he knew everyone (unfortunately). Once role was checked, he proceeded to finish grading the last group of tests he had not yet finished until class was half way done. There was a low murmur of voices as people chatted nervously, along with the quiet simmering of cauldrons and the hiss of the fire. A pungent smell filled the air. Snape closed his eyes for one moment and, blocking out the children's voices, listened to the soothing tones of the potions boiling in unison. He snapped out of it quickly and stood, walking around the room and looking at everyone's progress. He quickly found himself busy scolding Neville, who had dropped his moth wings in whole and had made his potion nearly a solid.

When Harry saw Snape swoop down on Neville like an overgrown bat, he found himself suppressing laughter. Hermione, sitting to his left, kicked him hard in the shins.

"Harry, stop it!" she commanded shrilly, yet in a very soft whisper. "You're going to get into trouble."

"Harry, Snape's right there!" said Ron, but he clapped a hand over his mouth to keep himself from laughing as well.

"I'm sorry, it's just… it's just too funny! All I can think is Snape swooping down on Talin, and her slapping him, then pouncing on him-" Harry began in a whisper, choking back stifled laughter.

"-with her tongue down his throat!" said Ron from underneath his hand. All three hung their heads, shoulders shaking with laughter. Most unfortunately for them, Snape had straightened up and stopped sneering at Neville just in time to hear the entire last of their conversation. He whirled around on his heels and strode over to them, dark eyes as set as cold tunnels, showing no emotion whatsoever.

"Having problems, Mr. Potter?" he asked, arriving at their table sharply. His voice was slightly strained, and his hands were clenching and unclenching themselves, as if wishing to be around the boy's neck.

"No sir," Harry said, face going blank. He glared up at the professor, who was seething.

"See me after class. And five points off Gryffindor for your attitude," he growled extremely tensely, but something flashed in his eyes that Harry caught: fear. Harry had him right where he wanted him. He smirked at Snape's retreating figure, escaping to his office.

How could he have found out? What? When? That brat, after all the times he had saved his pathetic neck, the boy has the nerve to hold his job over his head, dangling it on a string like a cat with a mouse's tail trapped in it paws. Severus tried to compose himself and succeeded after a few moments. With dark dignity, he opened the door, grabbed his grade book and walked to the first table, looking into the depths of the first cauldron, a dark purple potion glaring up at him. He scratched a passing grade into his book and continued down the desks, winding his way up the rows until he at last reached Potter's. A perfect potion simmered in front of him, and Harry watched Snape with cocky interest. He scratched a grade next to Potter, Harry, a barely passing one at that, and glared at him.

"Time to clean up, wash the sinks out, I don't want this all over or you'll be cleaning my room next time," he announced to the class, eyes never leaving Harry's. Harry narrowed his eyes and glared back; gone were the days he let people push him around. There was a fortunate distraction as Seamus dropped his cauldron at the sink, leaving a puddle at the boy's feet. With one last threatening glare, Severus tore his eyes from Harry and stalked over to Seamus, boiling the puddle with his wand, eventually evaporating it.

"Foolish children," he mumbled distractedly to himself. "Next class period, I expect two scrolls on correct dungeon procedure!" He shouted this last portion to the rest of the class, and a bell rung. Students began to file quickly out of the room, eager to escape, but the infamous trio hung back, eventually becoming just one person, Harry Potter, still sitting at his desk quietly, hands folded over the surface of the table. Snape shut the door behind the students, but heard an odd creaking noise as he stepped away. That's when he noticed that the door was ill balanced and was difficult to shut when not shut purposefully. And that's also when he realized how Harry had found out… the door swung open a few inches, giving a good view of the hallway outside. He glared at the door, then over to Harry. With a swish of his robes, he strode over to Harry's desk, standing in front of it.

"Care to repeat that little comment you made earlier with your faithful freckly sidekick Weasley?" growled Snape, folding his arms across his chest.

"I think you heard us the first time," Harry replied, almost sounding bored.

"I will not be spoken to in such a flippant manner!" Snape hissed. He paused, then began again. "How much did you see?"

"Enough to know this has been going on awhile," came Harry's reply.

"You insolent child! How dare you-"

"No, how dare you! I have quietly listened to your prattles about my parents for 6 years, and I won't stand for it anymore. One word in reference to my parents, family, or friends and I'll go straight to the Patil twins with this. They can spread word faster than you can blink," he said boldly, half surprised with himself. It had been a long time bottled in, a long time coming to Snape.

A think silence filled the air, then Snape asked, "Are you blackmailing me, Potter?"

"Not really, just sort of. It's not like I'm asking for money, I'm just asking you to keep your comments to yourself," said Harry, and he saw Snape tense.

"I refuse to be blackmailed by a small child," he snapped at Harry.

"Ok then. Let's see, I've got Divinations next… oh, Parvati's favorite subject-"

"You wouldn't dare…"

"Wouldn't I?" asked Harry with a dangerous glimmer in his eyes. "I'll keep it to myself for now." And with that, he picked up his bag and walked out of the room, leaving Snape gawking in all his fury.

~

When the bell rang and the students emptied out of her room, Cassi shut the door with glee and went back to her desk quickly, busying herself with some random paperwork so as not to look to eager that Snape would be coming. Sure enough, a few minutes later, the handle of her door rattled slightly and it swung open, and in stomped a very angry Severus. Alarmed, Cassi looked up and watched him.

"What? What is it?" she asked him as he shut the door, seemingly checking that it was indeed shut.

"We've been found out," came the dark reply, a low seething growl from his snarling lips. He turned to her now that he was satisfied the door was shut, walking up to her desk and glaring down at her.

"What are you talking about?"

"Potter and his little gang know about us. He knows, and he's blackmailing us." Silence, then….

"What?! How is that possible?" Cassi stood as she said this, though her shoulders were dropped in defeat and her eyes darted around wildly as if looking for the answer.

"I found out that my dungeon door wasn't shut properly when you were, eh, informing me of the meeting in the hallway," said Snape, crossing his arms.

"Oh no, you mean he saw that? Why was he spying on us in the first place? Why didn't the door shut? And why the hell are you looking at me like that?!" Cassi's hands were at her hips haughtily in a second, and it was like the last few months never happened, they were back to square one, fighting.

"I'm not looking at you like anything, and don't argue with me about that," he sneered as he saw her open her mouth to object to his comment, then snapped it shut. "And yes, he did see that, because someone didn't shut the door correctly!"

"Then something is wrong with your door because I was sure it was shut!"

"If you had been paying attention enough, you would have seen that the door frame is off and the door won't shut properly, but you were too preoccupied with other things!"

"It's probably off the frame because you've slammed it half a thousand times, scaring your students half to death! And now he's blackmailing us because you've been a bastard to him too many times!"

"He has no right to do that either way! Don't tell me you're siding with him!" Snape said irately in total disbelief.

"I'm not siding with him, Severus! Honestly, you're really one to talk about taking sides, constantly siding with your own House, never mind that the other students may be right!" Cassi's accent was dominating her speech, and her eyes were flashing. How dare he blame this on her!

"As if you don't have your favorites! And now look at what your favorite has done!"

"He might not have had to do it if you hadn't given him a reason! Ack, what are we going to do?"

"We can't do anything. There's nothing to be done, and I refuse to bend to his will," growled Snape.

"What were his terms?"

"I'm not to speak ill of anyone or thing he likes, and I refuse to repress my well-needed lectures."

"Gods, must you pick on everyone? Harry, his friends, his parents, Sirius, Remus, ME… you only protect yourself and things you think belong to you!" Cassi stopped, surprised with herself, but stood her ground.

"I will not listen to this anymore!" seethed Snape in a loud voice.

"Then leave! I'm done being blamed for things that are not my fault, now go off to sulk in your dungeons, thinking about what a horrid person I am. Go on, go!" She glared at him, and without another word, he left, slamming the door behind him. For a few seconds, Cassi could only stand there, watching the door, then she collapsed into her chair covering her eyes with her hands. Her job would be gone when word got out. She would move again, working in low paying jobs. And she would leave behind the only person she cared about…

She choked back tears. Upon thinking her last statement, her heart wrenched and broke, and she wished she could take it all back. But she couldn't. Drying her eyes roughly with her palms, she composed herself and compulsively organized her desk.

~

That went well, thought Snape to himself sarcastically upon arriving in his empty dungeon. He had already averted his eyes from the damn door that started it all, and from the wall near his desk (he had commanded to himself to stop attaching memories to inanimate objects, but no such luck). Even this place was haunted with memories, and it threatened to smother him.

He had not intended to make her angry, nor to fight with her, but it somehow came out that way. It always came out as anger whenever he wanted to express something… anger was a way of masking his fear. But fear of what? Rumor? Loss of profession? Respect, power… or something else…Cassi? She was already infuriated with him and he had hurt her badly, he had seen it in her eyes.

What can I possibly do? On one hand, he could keep his opinions to himself and lose all self-dignity to the brat, on the other, he could be himself and lose everything. Either way, he was trapped, and so was she. There was nothing he could do, the only thing he could think of was to wait it out. And wait he did.

One day turned into two, and two to three. Before long, a week had passed, a silent week of nerve wracking waiting. On the outside, it appeared as if nothing had changed. Snape had kept to himself, and Harry had kept his word. Cassi had not spoken with Snape in seven days, and she felt she was dying a slow death, a death of starvation of Severus. No matter how much she wanted to say something, to apologize for what she said, she couldn't. He was struggling as well, he ought to say something but the words weren't coming to him. So meal after meal passed and not a word was said between them, just a few sideways glances.

That Wednesday morning, things were going as normal for Severus. He awoke, grabbed a robe out of his closet, got dressed, brushed his hair (pointless, as always) and continued out of his room and entered his classroom. Torches lit themselves and brought the room to light in a yellow glow just as the sun was beginning to rise. He grabbed a quill off his desk distractedly, but stopped halfway through the motion as he noticed something was out of place. A crisp parchment letter sat blankly on his desk with nothing written on it except 'S. Snape'. Abandoning the quill, he grabbed up the letter and opened it roughly. He extracted a clean sheet of paper from it and scanned over it, then read through it once again, alarmed. Without a moment's hesitation, he put the letter back in its envelope and the envelope into his pocket, then left his room for Dumbledore's office.

***

Cassi poked her food around her plate, depressed. Seven days. Seven. She had hoped he would at least be at breakfast, but not even that. Dimly did she notice that Dumbledore wasn't occupying his normal at the center of the table either. She pushed her chair back and left the table.

***

The bell signaled the end of first class and people left Snape's class in quick shuffles. Dumbledore had given Severus a lot to think about, but he didn't have much time to actually think. He would be leaving in a few hours time, leaving to the last place he never wanted to be. Leaving and not exactly sure when or if he would be returning. He would travel light, bringing nothing with him save his wand. Somehow he felt he was forgetting something.

It clicked in his head at once, the one thought he had been successfully suppressing until this very moment. He was leaving Cassi on horrible terms. He didn't know what to do or say. On one hand, he could go (with the possibility of not returning) with his reputation for being a cruel, strict, yet loyal person in tact but leave Cassi to her own misery (if she would feel misery, that is). On the other, he could right things with her before he goes, possibly break her heart with his absence and be morphed in people's minds. He cared what others thought, he supposed it was some sort of compensation for being a Death Eater, and it took every ounce to keep his image up; if he slipped once, everyone fell back on the memory of his days of working for the Dark Lord.

The clock ticked annoyingly, ticking seconds of his time away, seconds of his life away. He made his decision after a few moments of contemplation and stood up to leave the room.

***

Cassi was walking glumly from the library down the main hallway amid the sea of students. She carried three rolls of parchment in her arms, notes she had been taking from a book in the library since she stopped spending her free time with him. She sighed as people pushed all around her in a struggle to get to class. It was about that time that she heard someone call her name, but she ignored them and continued shuffling along, pushing a strand of hair away from her face and behind her ear.

"Cassandra," called the voice again, and upon recognition of the voice, she turned around to see Severus Snape walking along the side of the hallways where there were fewer students. She waited for him to catch up, and he stood before her soon enough.

"Yes, Snape?" she said in a cool tone as he soon as he caught up with her. She surprised herself with that tone, but realized it was probably appropriate since they were in a huge hallway filled with unsuspecting students. He looked very sure of himself, almost stubbornly so, and she wondered what he was going to pick on her for this time (though any amount of picking was at least some attention).

"What have I told you about calling me Snape?" he asked in a growl. She was about to make some saucy reply when the next thing she knew, his hands were on her shoulders and his lips were pressed to hers firmly, and she dropped all her scrolls to reach up and touch his face. The sound of the scrolls hitting the ground was quite audible, as the entire hallway of students had gone silent in a sudden wave. A collective gasp was heard. Finally he let go and she opened her eyes slowly to see a circle of half-sick, half-shocked students forming around them.

"What are you all staring at? Get to class!" snapped Severus in a dangerous growl, and the sound returned to the main hall as hundreds of people broke out of their silence and began to class in quick whispers, still maintaining a safe distance from the two.

"Severus Snape! What was that for?!" asked Cassi once her senses had returned to her.

"I need to talk to you directly after the last class. Meet me at the iron gates," he said in a lowered voice, and she nodded, blue-violet eyes filled with curiosity. "He can't blackmail us anymore."

"No, he can't, can he? I suppose that solves that problem…" she said, and she bent down and picked up her scrolls. "I'm still amazed at you… public affection…" She shook her head at him, still living in a semi-dream like state as she walked on to her class just as the minute bell rang.

She arrived to class just in time. All the students were sitting in their desks, not making a single sound as soon as they heard the door open. Unruffled, she strode across her room, dumped her scrolls on her desk and picked up her attendance. All their 'here's were very small.

Exasperated, she sighed then said to them in a dry tone, "If anyone has any comments over what you have undoubtedly heard or seen about the professor and myself, kindly ask him about it. I'm sure he would simply love to answer your questions. Clear?" They nodded knowing full and well that no one would dare to do it. "Good! Alright, today's hex is a test of your deflection shields as well…"

All of her classes went like this. The students seemed subdued with shock, but this worked perfectly for Cassi, for she had much to think about. Quite honestly, she was surprised Dumbledore hadn't swooped down on her already and condemned her to banishment. And she wanted to know what Severus was going to say after school. Severus. She shivered when she thought his name. She hadn't thought he was capable of doing such a thing, not that she was objecting. The stress of the past week had been lifted off her shoulders, now she just had to wait and see what her punishment was for enjoying that kiss so much.

The bell sounded before dinner and the students began to file to the Great Hall for dinner. Cassi hung back and walked down the empty corridors, preferring to avoid all confrontations about today's events. Briskly, she walked down the hall and past the doors of the Great Hall to come to a stop at the giant wooden doors of the entrance of Hogwarts. Grabbing the wrought iron handle, she pulled it open and gasped at the coldness as it blasted in. However, she continued out the door and began trekking through the snow covered path to the iron gates where a figure in black was waiting for her. Her feet began to feel numb as she trudged through ankle high snow, but she finally made it down to him.

He was leaning against the gates but stood up when he saw her coming. When she stopped in front of him, neither said anything for a moment. The she began, "Severus, why are we out here?"

"I'm leaving," he said in a monotone voice.

"What?! Why? Where? When will you be back?"

"I got a letter this morning… A letter from Lucius. I've been invited back to the Inner Circle of the Dark Lord," he said without emotion.

"No, Severus! You can't go back to them! It could be a trap!" Cassandra was usually a fairly calm person, but this was the worst news she had heard, ever.

"What choice have I? If I go, I can continue to bring information for our side, or possibly walk into a trap. If I don't go, I've outwardly declared my repentance of Voldemort and I will be killed." Finally some emotion had been procured with this statement, but it came out more as this hopeless sort of anger. Without thinking, Cassi found herself in his arms, holding him tightly.

"I don't want you to go," she whispered. "When are you leaving? When are you coming back?"

"As soon as Dumbledore gets here, I'll go. As for coming back… I do not know. Tonight, tomorrow, a week, a month…" He trailed off.

"I hate this! Did Dumbledore agree to this?"

"We discussed it. It's the best thing to do."

"Hardly," was her reply, but she didn't say anything else. The bitter wind blew their robes to flutter with the breeze. He knew she was heartbroken, but he couldn't neglect this, as badly as he wanted to. Finally, she sighed and let go of him.

"We have horrible luck, don't we?" she managed weakly.

He smiled faintly. "I thought you didn't believe in luck or jinxes."

"Yes, that's true. But I believe in fate, and fate seems to be playing games with our lives."

"It has done that to me more times than I can count," he responded.

"Let's see fate toy with this," she said, and caught him into a sweet kiss, simple but overwhelming in the impact of emotion it carried. He found her hands and grasped them in his own, both savoring the moment with a bittersweet feeling. Finally, she felt his warm breath on her lips but didn't open her eyes. She was going to say it now, something she had been compelled to say for a long time.

"I…I love you Severus," she whispered to him. Shocked, he raised his eyebrows. She knew he wouldn't say it back, not because he didn't mean it, but because he could not say it out loud. However, another painfully sweet kiss from him told her all she needed to know.

"Do you know how much harder that makes it to leave? And if I don't come back…" he whispered back, lips softly grazing hers.

"Don't say that. Don't. You're coming back to me, I'll be waiting for you." He was about to say something but he caught a glance of something moving near the castle.

"Dumbledore is coming," he said with resign. Immediately, he felt rushed. "Cassi, I need you to promise me something."

"Anything."

"Promise me you won't go near Harper."

"Don't tell me you're still jealous-"

"It's not jealousy. Cassi, trust me, you have to stay away from him. I don't trust him, please." His pleading grew more urgent as Dumbledore drew nearer.

"I'll do it, but I would like to point out that you trust very few people. But if makes you sleep easier, I'll do it."

"It does. He's here." He was shaking slightly now, and she was practically in tears. He kissed her softly, kissing her goodbye. The crunch of snow beneath feet grew louder and louder until it eventually stopped, very close to them both.

"Public displays of affection, what does the teacher's code say about that?" asked Dumbledore, but when Cassi turned to look at him, still wrapped up in Severus' arms, she noticed he was smiling.

"Strictly prohibited," both said in unison. She leaned her head on his chest, plain defiance of the teacher's code.

"Just try to keep it out of the student's view. We don't need them running off with ideas on what they can do in the hallways," he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

"That's it? You're not going to fire us? What about the school board?" asked Cassi. Severus was shocked with this. They had both figured there would be more to it than a warning not to snog each other in plain sight (which neither really intended to do- it was enough that the student's knew there would not be a fight between them).

"That's it. What the school board doesn't know won't hurt them, and we don't have a rule on faculty relationships, technically. And now I technically owe Minerva a Sickle. I figured you'd hold out for a bit longer, Besides, they have other things to worry about," he said, starting off playful (much to their dropped-jaw disbelief and objections when they heard of his bet) and ending on a serious note, reminding them of the situation at hand.

"Cassi…"

She let go of him, nodding and fighting back all show of emotion. "I'll be waiting for you." And she stepped back.

Dumbledore shook Severus' hand, then opened the gate, through which Severus slipped out of. The gate slammed shut with a deep, loud bang. With a nod, he began walking, disappearing at a curve in the dirt path into the forest. Cassi was gripping the cold metal gate, watching him until she couldn't see him anymore.

"Come along, my dear, you'll catch a cold, and I don't think Severus wants you sick," he said warmly, and he grasped her icy hand and lead her back to the castle. She complied silently, walking back in nearly a daze. She missed him already, and he had been gone all of five minutes. He brought her back to the Great Hall, but she broke away, saying she didn't feel well and was going to go back to her room and sleep. Dumbledore consented and bade her goodnight. With a light patter of her shoes, she stepped up the marble steps, stalked down the hallway, and eventually came to her room and locked herself in it.

With a sigh, she looked around her room. It was lit with torches and with the moon's light pouring through the window. She muttered a spell and lit the room up more fully, then walked over to her desk, sitting down at it. Her impulse was to set her head down and cry, but she would not let herself, so she pulled out her scrolls and started converting them into future lesson plans.

Within a few hours, she was deep into her notes, totally absorbed in her work in a desperate attempt to forget why she felt worried and sick. She wanted him back in her arms, safe in the walls of Hogwarts. Away from things that made his eyes flash with pain, because it killed her to see that look. Every time she thought something like this, she would just dip her quill into the inkpot and force her concentration onto her task at hand.

She found herself wondering how unhealthy it was to be using work as a distraction when she heard a small sound. Her head snapped up, looking around her room. Shaking her head at her own paranoia, she went back to her work. A few minutes later, another sound. And once again, there was no one in the room. This was unnerving, so she opened her drawer, dug under a stack of papers and found her small dagger underneath them. Just as she touched the cool metal of it's sheath, a hand clapped on her shoulder and she whirled around to see Simon standing next to her.

"Oh God Simon, you scared me half to death! Don't do that!" she gasped. For a moment relief had washed over her, but when she looked up at him again, she noticed that his eyes glittered strangely and her promise to Severus rung in her ears. She shrugged slightly to get his hand off her shoulder, but he gripped it tighter.

"Now see, that's just like you. I go through all this trouble to be a nice guy, and I still get shrugged off," he started, almost conversationally. He clapped both his hands to her shoulders roughly.

"Simon, you're starting to scare me. Leave," she said, tone hardening.

"I can't leave. I've got a job to do."

"And what would that be?"

Simon ignored her right then. He had lifted one of his hands off her shoulder and was pulling her hair away from her neck, examining it. "Interesting. A week ago you had marks all along your neck. I would have thought after today's stunt that you would have had a few more. Very peculiar. Yes Talin, I've known about you and Snape before even you knew about it. He was horribly suspicious of me from the off, and he's been in my way ever since. I could have had this job finished a month ago if he hadn't interfered."

"Do not think I will sit idly and listen to this," she said through gritted teeth, blood pounding in her ears.

"No no, you're much to fiery for that. I've seen so. I watched you when you killed my Acromantula."

"Your Acromantula? What was the purpose of that?" Cassi's head was spinning and she felt a wave of panic clash with a wave of bravery.

"I was testing you. The Dark Lord is more than interested in you, little girl. You have powers and techniques that lead us to suspicion. I was supposed to be working as a spy, and here you come along and give a whole new purpose to my work."

She had heard enough. Within a second, she had picked up her dagger, unsheathed it, and had it his throat, standing eye level with him and twisted out of his grip. The blade sung with the vibrations of the unsheathing. "Give me a reason. I dare you," she growled. He looked at her with shocked eyes, then smiled, regaining his unnerving calm.

"You wouldn't kill me."

"No, I'm going to take you to Dumbledore. Now if you come alive is up to you. Give me trouble and I will." A tense second of silence passed between them. He grabbed at her hand and pushed it away, shoving her against the wall. The battle then ensued for the dagger, which she was trying to return to his throat. He reached up and choked her with his free hand, keeping her pinned against the wall.

"Look what it's come to. Tsk tsk. Drop the dagger. I'm supposed to bring you alive."

"Like hell you will!" she managed, and jerked her hand out of his and beat the hilt of the dagger against his head. He let go of her to grip his head slightly, and was immediately struck with another blow. Just as she had re-gripped it to use the blade end of it, he swung his hand around and hit her alongside the face, sending her flying to the ground, but she had grabbed his robes and pulled him down as well. Before she could attempt to sit up, he had sent the dagger skidding out of her reach and pinned her hands above her head, straddling her to keep her down.

"My, isn't this an awkward position?" he asked in a sickly sweet voice.

"Don't you even think about it!"

"And why not? Severus is dead anyway! We needed him out of the way for this, and he betrayed the Dark Lord, and everyone who does so must pay. Was this news to you? You didn't honestly think he'd get away with sneaking back into our numbers, did you? Oh, how cute. You did. Adfectus torpesco!" During his speech he had taken advantage of the fact that she had gone into shock so he had time enough to pull his wand from his belt and curse her.

Cassi suddenly felt very numb. It was the weirdest sensation, not pleasant at all, rather claustrophobic-like. She felt her mind was floating above her body, dimly watching her situation but unable to move fully without her reactions being lagged and somewhat incoherent. In a very distant part of her mind, she felt pressure on her lips, but she could not pull away, she had no energy to do so. Her mind was panicking, trying to move, to resist but ultimately failing. I'm going to die. I will be his toy until he drags me off to Voldemort, who will kill me. I'm going to die. From far away she felt a pain across her cheek, he had slapped her, yet she still lay there as if dead. He was yelling at her for something, but she refused to concentrate on his words. Suddenly, his words stopped. She opened her eyes slightly to see a very blurry Simon looking at something in another direction. Dumbly, she looked that way as well. Before she could make out what was shadowing her doorway, she felt herself being picked up and being held against her attacker with one arm, then a cool feeling on her neck. Slowly her senses told her that a knife blade was pressed to her neck, and she struggled to lift her hand to push it away, but grew weary and went limp in her attackers arms. Faintly, she heard voices arguing and concentrated hard to understand their words.

"Any closer and I'll kill her!" That was Simon, she was pretty sure. It was close to her.

"You couldn't kill her. If you bring back a dead body, the Dark Lord will end your life and you know it!" Who was this one? She liked this voice, and tried to lift her head, but she felt her energy waning, and her blurry world was beginning to blacken.

"But if I bring back two dead bodies…"

"I'd like to see you try that. You had better put her down and undo the spell, she's going to black out if you keep her under it. I daresay he wouldn't like that either." The voice was firm and deep, but fading into the blackness…

She felt her body slump and hit the floor. Then a rush of senses came back to her, overwhelming her. As soon as she sat up with a rush of adrenaline, she saw Simon flying back into the wall, a green light throwing him there. The high pitched sound of her dagger hitting the ground in a clatter rung in her ears. She snatched for it and grabbed it up, but felt Simon tug on her robes, pulling her to him, his wand out and pointing at her. Without being able to give it a second thought, she plunged her knife into his side.

He gasped and pulled it out, startled at her. Time seemed to be suspended. "You will pay. You will…pay!" he finally muttered to her, and blood appeared at the corners of his mouth, then his lips. His bulging blue eyes stared into hers with a fierce anger. Finally, he passed out and went limp. Horrified, she scooted back from him, staring at her hands, then blacked out from shock and exhaustion.

She woke herself up a few seconds later, shaking her head and clearing her vision. A person in black was kneeling next to the dead figure of Simon Harper. She strained her eyes and concentrated on the figure. "S-Severus?" she asked weakly. The figure snapped his head up and looked at her. It was him, and she wanted to throw herself at him, but something took over and she refrained and instead scrambled to stand up and back against the wall, far from him.

"What are you doing here? Simon, he said…" she asked, still keeping herself against the wall. She had just killed someone. Dead. Simon was dead.

Severus stood, abandoning the body. He tried to walk to her, but she scooted farther down the wall. "Cassandra Talin, what are you doing?" he asked quietly.

"I…you can't touch me. No! I killed him! What do you want with me?!" she asked, half hysterical. She covered her eyes with her hands, shaking visibly.

"Calm down, girl! He would have killed you if you hadn't killed him. It's survival of the quickest, dammit Cassi!" He grasped her wrists and gently pulled them down from her eyes, then sliding his hands up to gently grip her arms. "Look at me…look at me. I'm not going to hurt you. Alright? The spell hasn't completely worn off. Alright, I want you to sit right here. Do not move. Don't. I will be back in a few seconds; I have to send someone for Dumbledore."

"Don't leave me," she whispered, but he was already out the door. She sat, curled up in a ball on the floor, collecting her thoughts as her mind cleared from the spell and the shock. Sensibility, reason, and logic all came back to her, calming her down and hardening her heart. Finally she looked up and glared at the dead body dripping blood on her floor. Why did he do that? Was I fooled all along?

True to his word, Severus was back in the room within a few seconds, looking out of breath and weary. He came and sat down next to her, and at that moment she realized he looked battered as well as he groaned slightly while sliding down next to her.

"Are you alright?" she asked him, sounding a lot calmer than she still felt.

"Yes yes, I'm fine-" He stopped when she picked up his hand and looked at it, a livid red slash across his palm. She looked at it painfully, then up at him, eyes searching his. "It was a trap… to lure me away from here. It was only two men though, it wasn't hard to escape. Look, I'm just fine! Gods, I'm the one who should be worried, he could have killed you!"

"But he didn't, did he? I killed him instead. I thought you were dead, the way he spoke…"

"I sent a note ahead saying that their plan had succeeded. And I am no reason to give up, Cassi!" She gave him a sad sort of look that told him she would contradict him any day of the week, and he let it go, startled by her deep affections. He was about to say something, when Dumbledore ran into the room, breathless and looking angered.

"Minerva just caught me… where is he?" he asked, and Severus pointed across the room at the corpse lying in a pool of crimson blood. Dumbledore looked fierce as he stood over the body, sneering slightly. He then confronted the two huddled against the wall, kneeling before them.

"Cassandra…can you tell me what happened?" he asked slowly, being very gentle with his words. She took a quick side-glance at Severus, who nodded slightly, and began until she stumbled in her words of when Severus had appeared in the doorway. Quickly, Severus took over the story from there, and Cassi listened to her own actions as if she didn't know the person.

"Self-defense, right. Severus, you may want to take her out of here while I inform the Ministry and remove the body," he said in a clear voice. Severus nodded, but Cassi protested.

"I'm fine, I can handle being here with you two!" she tried to say, but she took Severus' hand to help her stand. "I swear, I'm fine."

"You shouldn't be here for this. Trust me," said Snape, and she sighed and left the room with him, walking down the dark corridors quietly. He led her back to his dungeons, torches flickering to life upon their entrance. Cassi sighed again, pausing after taking a few steps into the room, her back turned to him.

"Go help Dumbledore. I know you want to. Go on," she said gently. He looked at her hard.

"I do," he said with a grimace, "But I can't leave you here alone after what happened-"

"Snape! I'm fine!" she said angrily, turning to face him. "There are times when I think you underestimate me, I'm quite alright. Look, there's no one else who's going to come try to kidnap me while I'm in your dungeons. I'll be fine, you go, I'll wait." She crossed her arms, but was surprised when he softly placed a hand on her shoulder, melting her quick temper.

"Cassi, I do not underestimate you, but I… happen to understand your situation a little better than you think. If you think you can handle being alone, then yes, I will go. But first, I'm giving you something for this," said Snape, lifting one of her shaking hands. She looked at her own hand with bitter disgust for projecting her fear and weakness. In a stolen glance, he caught her expression and knew exactly what she was thinking. He wove his fingers through hers and kissed her hand. "Don't Cassi. You did what anyone would have done. The Dark side works in ways you will never know, betrayal and murder is a game to them, a game of chess. It's a thrill to them. You're not like them, and if you even begin to think so…"

"I know, I know. It's just hard not to think that, so very hard. Especially when you're Marked." She sighed and let go of his hand, and he went to his cabinet and pulled out a short, round bottle of smoky red liquid.

"One swallow of this, and stay seated after taking it, if you don't mind. I don't need you collapsed on the ground again. Thank you, yes. And you're sure-" began Severus after taking back his little bottle of half-drunk potion, but was interrupted by her.

"Severus, I'm fine. I think I'm just going to sit here and think. I'll be right here when you get back, I swear," she said, and he nodded. He looked reluctant for a second, then stood and left. She stared after him for some time, until a pang of tiredness hit her and she sat down in a student's chair, leaning forward and laying her head on the table. Maybe she'd sleep for just a few minutes…

Cassi ran from the house, the dark of night shrouding her as she slipped into the forest. She wasn't sure why she was running, but she needed to escape, and this thought alone drove her into the heart of the forest.

Out of breath and way out of the house's range, she stopped under a patch of moonlight, panting. She moved her hand to push a strand of hair out of her eyes when she froze, hand bathed in the silver moonlight. The light shone down on blood soaked hands, dripping with the sin. She screamed at her hands.

Cassi awoke sharply, still sleeping in her arms at the student's desk. She unfolded her arms and sat up blearily, noticing Severus standing next to her, his hand on her shoulder and looking slightly alarmed.

"You scared me," she recovered quickly.

"I'm sorry, I just got back."

"What time is it?"

"About two in the morning."

"And I have to teach tomorrow with this amount of sleep? Wonderful." She straightened up and ran her fingers through her hair. He looked uncomfortable, and she surmised what he was going to say before he said it. "Dumbledore doesn't want me teaching tomorrow or for awhile, does he?"

"Not really. It would be too stressful. Then again, he doesn't want me teaching either, but I really don't think that will be happening…"

She swung her feet off the table, stood, and smiled at him. "Then I'll see you tomorrow morning. Goodnight."

"Oh no you don't," he said, and he blocked her way to the door. "I think he's right. You really shouldn't teach tomorrow, not after what happened tonight."

"And you're allowed to teach because why? Your life was attempted just like mine was. If I stay out the rest of the week, then you will too." She crossed her arms and glared at him, tapping her foot.

He glared back, also crossing his arms. "You're still in my care, and I say you aren't teaching tomorrow."

"No."

"Yes."

"No-o."

"Yes."

She grabbed his collar, kissed him roughly, then let go. "It's cute that you care, but no. I'll see you in the morning." And she left the room, shutting the door behind her.

"Damn her," he said to the door. "And I am not cute."

~

Cassandra ran into the headmaster almost as soon as she had escaped the vicinity of the dungeons. After much persuasion and arguing, she was finally able to convince him that she did not need a break from her works, and that it would actually help if she did not dwell on it. He looked most reluctant to let her do this, and told her so.

"If your concentration on your work grows to an unhealthy level, I will be forced to make you take time off," he had said with concern.

"It won't, I promise," she replied gratefully.

"No doubt Severus will see to this anyway," Dumbledore said in an undertone, though he was smiling. However, she had heard him quite clearly.

"He is a workaholic himself, you know," she said, trying not to blush. Please don't blush, please don't blush…

"I do know that. But I also know he wouldn't let you dabble in his unhealthy habits," said Dumbledore, still smiling, and Cassi felt herself burn with blush. Dumbledore laughed, shook his head, then grew more serious. "And you're absolutely sure you can be comfortable teaching in you classroom?"

Cassi thought about this, rubbed her temple, and sighed. "It would be too confusing for the students to switch classrooms so late in the year. I'll be fine, unless… how much are you telling them?"

It was Dumbledore's turn to rub his temple and sigh. "They deserve to know what their teacher was and what happened to him. For security and practical purposes, your involvement will be left out. They won't know what happened in the classroom."

A moment of pensive silence fell upon the conversation. Finally, Cassi spoke. "Dumbledore…why? Why me? What happened…I didn't expect that from him. Severus warned me, but how did he know?" This all tumbled uncontrolled from her mouth, and for a moment she regretted her frivolity of her words, but then agreed it was for the best.

"I can't answer half of the those questions simply because I don't know. His identity is still a mystery to us, and we don't know his motive. It seems the Dark side has an interest in you…"

Cassi shook her head. "I don't know why either… maybe because of, well…" she cut off, rubbing her inner arm. Dumbledore nodded.

"We'll bring it up at the next meeting. Go try and rest… and I'm glad to you're still with us." He smiled one last time and patted her shoulder while she whispered her thanks.

Soon after, she walked into her classroom, looking cautiously around her room. Desks were in neat order, as were the books. In fact, everything looked just as it should, there was no evidence of what took place a few hours before. Absently, she walked to the spot were Simon's body should lie, but not even a stain marred the stone floor, though it smelt slightly of potion. Dropping to her knees, she reached out and touched the floor, then stared at her pale hands.

"Who ever you are, I'm sorry."

~

And the rest of the week passed like this. In the morning, the students gasped at the news of their Muggle Studies professor, angered and sickened by the deception. The only bright point of this was that the rumors of Severus and herself were pushed back in everyone's mind and were no longer the main subject of talk. This was a relief because Cassi did not know if she could deal with anything more than what she had already experienced. Classes were torture to teach, and every time she closed her eyes, it was Simon in a pool of blood that she saw.

She found she could not sleep at night. One night, she just stared out her window pensively for awhile until she became sleepy, another night she graded papers, yet another she paced around her room until a very restless night came and she could not stay in the castle any longer. She slipped on her school robes and grabbed her cloak before slinking out of her room and out of the castle into the early February night air.

She had come outside to think things through. Maybe she hoped that the cool night air would freeze her guilt, or that the moon's bright beams would soothe her soul. Her feet carried her to her rock on the edge of the forest, which she sunk down next to and leaned back against, staring up at the clear night sky. The stars twinkled innocently at her, winking and dancing in the black-blue velvety night sky. She sighed and stared up at them, envying them. They had not killed anyone, they did not have enemies or tangled lives… and they were always stars, they had been stars in their past, and they would remain stars in their future. She envied their steadiness.

Her ears perked to a light sound across the grass. Her senses were sharp since her attack, and no small sound went undetected. The noise came again, and she slipped her hand into her pocket, grasping her knife that she had pocketed before coming out here. The noise came to a halt, and her body tensed. Without warning, she sprung up and at a figure that stood near her, tumbling it to the ground. Before anything else could happen, she had the flat of the blade pressed against its throat.

"Severus!" she cried out as she recognized the figure. She withdrew her blade from his neck and placed it near the rock.

"Nice to see you too," he groaned, sitting up partially. "And nice to know you still carry that knife around everywhere, ready to finish me off at a moment's notice."

"Sorry, I'm rather edgy. You would be too, you know." She was on his lap from springing at him, but was now sliding off of him and returning to her seat at her rock. He moved and sat closely next to her. "What are you doing out here?" she asked with a sigh.

"I…I couldn't sleep. I thought I would take a walk but found your tracks across the snow," he explained. "I take it you haven't been sleeping much either?" She shook her head. He let this pass in silence, staring up at the stars. A breeze ruffled the trees in the forest, and shook their branches. "You're thinking about him again, aren't you?" Her eyes turned to him when he asked this, searching his deep black eyes.

"Yes, I was… It's hard not to. I mean, I kil-"

"Cassandra, don't even-"

"Severus, how can I not?! A person is dead because of me!"

"You had to. There's no other way around it. Had you not, he would have taken you Voldemort, who is worse than death himself. And they would have done this without hesitation, Cassi. They don't care who they kill. They've even stopped counting how many they've killed, the numbers are too great to keep track of. The fact of the matter is that you had to do what you did," he said with great passion, ending his speech with a touch to her cheek. Cassi was so surprised at this that she did not argue, instead, she shocked Severus by leaning her head against his shoulder. Rarely did he talk of his Death Eater days, and she knew it was a subject he preferred to stay off of, so she took this quietly. Minutes passed where no words were spoken, but they knew everything that was being communicated.

"How did you know he worked for the other side?" she asked him curiously.

"I have suspected him from the beginning of the year."

"You suspected me too, if you'll remember."

"…That's beside the point. Nothing seemed right with him, he called me into his office to talk about nothing at all. He was in the room when McGonagall was after me to go find you before the Acromantula attack… something was just off." He shook his head. "But I should have listened to you when you said it was a trap," he said after a long silence with self-disgust. "I endangered much more than myself…"

"You did not realize. And you truly did not have a choice; you were correct when you said that they would have killed you had you not gone. And how were you to know exactly what was going to happen with Harper? Do not feel sorry on my account. I'm still here, aren't I?" She tilted her head to look up at him.

Don't do that, you look so innocent when you do that. I feel like I'm blackening you just with my touch. "Yes you're still here, but sometimes it's not enough to just exist. Contentedness and happiness are sometimes more important." He sighed heavily.

"And who says I do not have contentedness and happiness? I find myself perfectly content, thank you kindly," she whispered, snuggling against him.

"I don't understand how you can derive so much pleasure from me at all," he said, shaking his head. "I told you that I wasn't very good for you-"

"And that you weren't what I wanted, I remember that. But I don't listen all that well, do I?" She smiled and he smiled back, then shifted her slightly so she was resting in his lap once again. "You couldn't have been more wrong. And you're not as evil and dark as you think you are."

"You'd be surprised."

"You're too hard on yourself. You're not who you used to be, you're not a Death Eater. You're a better person than you let on," she said in a whisper, stroking his neck softly with her fingertips. He had a slight weakness about his neck, and often shivered when she would hit a sensitive spot. "Cold?" she purred smugly on one such occasion.

"Damn you woman, smirking and smiling. Actually," he said, brushing stray strands of hair out of her face, grazing her skin, "You feel very cold. We should probably go inside, you're probably going to get sick already from lack of sleep and sitting the snow at night."

"Very funny. Yes, it's getting late…" She slipped off his lap reluctantly, grabbed her knife and stood, placing it in her pocket. He stood alongside her, and walked with her to the castle, both listening to the crunch of the snow beneath their feet. They snuck into the dark castle as quietly as possible, hoping someone would oil the door's old, creaky hinges one of these days.

When it came time for their paths to part, Snape decided to walk to her room, just in case. She grinned and shook her head (though she had actually intended to somehow make him come with her anyway- she was prolonging the inevitable, she knew, but even a few more minutes with him was worth it), walking with him up the stairs and down the black corridors. When they did in fact reach her classroom, she pulled him inside, just to be with him for a little while longer and shut the door behind him.

She was unfastening her cloak, pulling it off her shoulders, and hanging it on a peg behind her when she noticed Severus was leaning against her blackboard, watching her, dark eyes piercing her mind, shining out against pale skin. Cassi turned her eyes to her desk to conceal her slight blush. She busied herself with taking her knife out of her cloak pocket and placing it in the desk drawer when she and asked through a smile, "And just what are you looking at, Professor?"

"I was just… watching," he said nonchalantly, shrugging slightly. She shut the drawer slowly and walked over to him, placing her arms around his neck, which allowed him to encompass her in his arms. When she looked up at him, she found she was having a difficult time tearing her eyes off of his.

"So I see… well… goodnight," she said after a moment's silence, and she placed a kiss on his lips, able to shut her eyes with ease now. However, one short kiss led to another, slightly stronger one. Then that led to a longer, deeper kiss, and before either realized how swept away they were, she was backed against the hard stone wall, fingers trailing down his robes to come to his belt, which she began to undo without giving it a thought. He had already undone three buttons down her back, touching cool fingertips to her skin. Her heart was in her throat and her hands shook slightly.

"I want you," she managed when he had pulled back slightly to breathe.

"Thank God," was all he could say before she caught him up in another kiss. The next time he gasped for air, she was at his neck, working a sensitive area over with butterfly light kisses until he made a small noise in his throat like a restrained moan. At this point his kisses grew rougher and he pinned her against the wall, taking slight control of the situation. She grasped his hands off her body delicately and pulled him into her office and through the door there, making sure the doors were shut behind them and locked. The last door, the bedroom door, slammed shut, closed by a severely distracted Severus.

~

Hours passed. The room was dark save one candle, which weakly lit the room. Cassi serenely lay in bed watching the flickering candle flame wobble on the wick, her thoughts not really consumed with the flame but with the person beside her, who was stroking the back of her arm. She began to notice that his fingers tended to stray to one area on her shoulder, tracing a pattern there. Sighing, she knew what was bothering him and she turned onto her back to look up at Severus, who was lying on his side gazing down at her.

"It's a horrible scar, isn't it?" she whispered.

"Yes," he murmured. "You have them all down your back… curse scars, knife scars, burns… Death Eaters bear more scars than any normal person will know of."

"You have them too, down your shoulders, across your back…" She trailed off, hinting that it was more than body that was scarred. She shivered suddenly and pulled herself closer to him, and he re-adjusted himself so that she was in his arms with her head on his shoulder. She sighed contentedly.

He kissed her forehead softly and kept her close, taking in as many details as possible to convince himself that this was real. Blinking blue-violet eyes peered up at him, windows to the soul he felt his soul had just touched fingertips with. As he gently moved one hand to touch her lips, he wondered how long this unnatural good fortune would last, and if he would be robbed of it as he always has been. He tried not to think about it.

"God you're gorgeous," he whispered to her, finally able to voice that particular thought that had been invading his mind for months upon months. She blushed and looked away, secretly pleased.

"You sweet talk," she said finally, then grinned. "The day Severus Snape sweet talks is the day they invent self-spelling wands. The day Muggles and wizards live peacefully, the day-"

"The day the Potions professor finds himself in bed with the Defense teacher," added Snape with a smirk, and she laughed.

"Yes… not that the Potions professor is complaining, I see."

"No, not in the slightest. Quite the contrary."

Cassi laughed and closed her eyes sleepily. "I love you," she murmured before falling asleep in his arms. He petted her hair as she fell asleep, then kissed her softly and slept as well.

***

The sun burst into the room through the window, awakening Severus from his pleasant sleep. For a split second he forgot where he was, then remembered everything from last night. Quickly, he glanced next to him to find Cassi sleeping softly, not run off or even fabricated from some wonderfully realistic dream. She was still his, lying next to him in bed, the sun playing across her face. He resisted the urge to touch her cheek. His next order of business was to find his wand and do something to that window that dared to wake him up.

He reached over, taking great care not to move too much so as to wake her up, and felt around on top of the nightstand where he had placed wand last night before she had relocated his robes. However, it was not there. The single drawer of the stand was slightly open though, and there was a very good chance that it had been knocked off the top of the stand and rolled into the drawer. Sure enough, his wand was in the front of the slightly opened drawer, so he pulled it out. Something was tangled on it though, and he pulled his wand closer to examine it.

A necklace had been tangled around the wand, so he slid it off into his palm. What he saw almost made him drop his wand and the necklace all at once. On a twisted silver chain was an amulet; an amulet of a detailed snake wrapped around a heart, little black beady eyes glaring up at him. He only knew of two necklaces like this; he owned one and the other had been given to someone he cared very deeply for a very long time ago… but here it was, the Snape family symbol resting in his palm.