Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author's Note: This one is long and it'll have to sustain people for a while because I'm going to focus on getting out chapter for my other stories. And reviews are always, always welcome as our new members to the Forbidden Scenes club. :o) You'll be getting something for this chapter!
Chapter 8
When Jason got home it was already dark outside. He had been out of town, for his cousin's wedding, for the few days. He was a bit worried. The first two nights he had been there he and Tommy had spoken but last night and this morning before he left, Jason hadn't been able to get a hold of him. He wasn't too concerned. After all Ranger business sometimes took awhile, but the niggling fear that something was wrong wouldn't leave him.
The warm lights that were on upstairs contrasted sharply with the darkness peeking through the basement windows. Jason sighed. He would have liked it if Tommy had been home. The wedding had been beautiful and Joey, his cousin, had been so happy he was there but that feeling was only shared by about half of the family. The other half had looked at him with open disgust, some going as far as leaving when he arrived, and one particularly vile uncle of his had gone out of his way to try and make Jason miserable.
That was part of the reason Tommy hadn't gone with him, even though Joey had had been adamant he was more than welcome. They had both agreed that it would be easier for the not accepting but not openly disgusted relatives if only Jason went. Neither liked it but they didn't want to spoil Joey and his bride's special day.
Entering the dark apartment with a sigh, Jason briefly thought about calling Trini and talking to her about the whole thing since Tommy wasn't around. He dropped his duffle bag by the door and began searching for the light switch when...
"You're home early." A surprised voice said softly.
Jason nearly jumped out of his skin. He instinctively fell into a defensive stance before he placed the voice. Why was Tommy sitting alone in the dark? "Yeah. I stayed for the wedding but Uncle Milton," Jason winced, "well; he was as charming as usual."
"Oh. Sorry." Tommy paused slightly and then sighed in relief. "I'm so glad you're here."
"What's wrong?" Jason asked, fumbling for, finding and finally flicking on the light. He nearly gasped. "What the hell happened to you?!"
Tommy was a mess. He had a bruise on his cheek, a cut above his eye and on his chin and Jason was willing to bet that there were more bruises underneath his clothing. Jason knew his lover well and could see in his eyes that any physical pain he felt was nothing compared to his emotional distress. That was what worried him the most.
But Jason wanted to see how badly hurt Tommy was first. He hugged him briefly before inspecting his face tenderly with his fingers. Tommy let him without protest, tilting his head willingly for Jason's gentle ministrations. It was comforting to know Jason was so concerned about him and the small, soothing kisses Jason pressed against his temple helped him to relax.
Jason stripped him of his shirt next, wincing in sympathy at the trail of large bruises that started at his left shoulder and looped around to the small of his back. He was not fond of what he found marring Tommy's wrists either. They also bore bruises all the way around but the way they were cut and chaffed as if a rope had bit into them concerned Jason much more.
When he was satisfied he had found and inspected all of Tommy's injuries, Jason set about fixing him up. He deposited Tommy into a chair and quickly gathered up what he would need. With deft hands he cleaned and bandaged all the small hurts, pressing soothing kisses around anything that made Tommy cringe away from his helping hands. The wrists were the worst. They were very painful even with all the care Jason took.
It was when Jason was bandaging his wrists, after the painstaking task of cleaning them, that Tommy spoke. "I gave up my Powers."
Jason looked up; trying to read his lover's shuttered face. "The transfer was tonight?"
Tommy nodded. "We found out yesterday that we needed to find replacements by tonight."
"That's not a lot of time. Did you find someone?" Jason asked, keeping his tone carefully neutral.
"Yeah. A guy named TJ Johnson." Tommy's eyes were far away. "He reminded me of you; that's why I picked him."
Jason quickly swallowed the lump in his throat that comment brought on. "And these? Where did they come from?" Jason asked, gently cradling Tommy's hurt wrists.
"Divatox managed to capture me. I was knocked out for most of it. When I came to I was hanging over a void. TJ and Cassie, Kat's replacement, rescued me. I think the burns are from struggling against the ropes. I don't remember everything." Tommy's voice was dead. It sounded to Jason as though a piece of him had been ripped away.
They scary thing was that it had been. Jason knew what it was like to give up a set of Powers and Tommy had been a Ranger for so long...Jason sighed and pulled his lover into his arms, being very gentle so he did not hurt him. Tommy snuggled close to him, relishing the warmth and safety of Jason's strong arms. He felt so loved when he was wrapped up in those arms. It felt like coming home again.
Tommy shuddered slightly as he let himself think back to earlier that night. He knew it was time for him to give up being a Ranger. He did want to move on with his life but a part of him would always long for the time when he was a hero. The feeling of the Power still being there, within him, and yet now completely out of his reach, brought back painful memories of his previous Power losses.
When he was losing the Green Ranger powers Zordon had told him that it was impossible for someone to entirely lose or give up any of the power sources the Power Rangers used. They bearer of the power and the power itself had to connect for a source to be of any use. That connection was impossible to break once it was made. Residues of the power would always remain within the person who bore them, though they would not be powerful enough to use or to cause any damage to the person. Still, the feeling of the great powers all the Rangers once held were there, dulled but there.
The remembrance of that conversation had terrified him after Jason had had to give up the gold Ranger power. The thought that the power that had been killing him was still there had scared him badly. It had taken some extra tests from Trey and a lot of reassurance from Zordon to get him to stop worrying.
"What are you thinking, love?" Jason asked as Tommy grew silent.
"Do you think it's true?" Tommy questioned. "All those times Zordon told us 'Once a Ranger, Always a Ranger' do you think that's true?"
"Yes." Jason answered without hesitation. Tommy looked at him unsurely, waiting for clarification. "Tommy, to me being a Ranger was never the powers, it was more than that. The reasons we were picked to be Rangers, the reason Zordon chose us, let us wield all of that power and bear all that responsibility, that's what makes us Rangers. The powers…That was just what physically embodies it. Being a Ranger is something much deeper than that."
To his surprise and concern, Tommy stiffened and shrugged off his arms. He rose and walked away, stopping in the middle of the room and just standing there. Jason briefly thought of going to him but decided to wait, to see what was going on in Tommy's sometimes muddled head before going after him.
For a moment he just stood there in silence, battling demons Jason could not help him fight, and when he turned he was paler than before. "He never chose me."
"What?" Jason did not follow Tommy's train of thought for a moment. 'What the hell does he mea…Oh shit.'
"He never chose me. I was never one of his Rangers. Rita is the one who decided that I would be one because…You know why she chose me dammit!" Tommy started to pace, agitated and beyond distressed that Jason, his Jason, could feel that way. "I know he never cared for me the way he cared for the rest of you, that I was just there because…because…I don't even know why he kept me around for so long. I always respected him so much but I could never…I was never like you guys, I was only a Ranger because of Rita…"
"Stop it." Jason voice was low and commanding. Tommy couldn't remember the last time he had heard that much steel in the normally warm voice. It grabbed and held his attention even though Jason still sat, seemingly relaxed, in the chair.
"You have not been Rita's Ranger since you joined our side, not to the others, not to me and especially not to Zordon." Jason eyes were nearly burning with intensity. To have Tommy think that of them, him, was insulting. "Do you think Zordon would have let you keep those powers if he didn't think you were worthy of them? You think that he wouldn't have found a way to take them from you? Honestly, you were so down when you first joined us all he had to do was ask for you to give them up and you would have handed them over."
"You may have been too wrapped up in your own guilt to see it but he loved you just as much as the rest of us. He saw something in you that you were too blind to see on your own. And you still can't see it! I can! We all can! You just insist on continuing to wallow in the guilt you force upon your self. Get over it already! You were coerced into being evil. We all know that that wasn't you. We've all forgiven you. Just because you can't let go of what happened doesn't mean the rest of us still hold it against you." Jason was mad now. He was mad at Tommy for still holding on to all this and was simply enraged at anyone who had contributed to him having a guilt muscle the size of Russia.
"Do you really think that Zordon would have given you the White Ranger powers, the best powers there were, if he didn't trust you and care for you? Do you really think I would have been willing to step down as leader to anyone except you? Do you think I would have let someone who wasn't worthy look after my team, my family!? If you do that's just fucking insulting." Jason had to spit out the words, but his voice never rose. Tommy thought he would have preferred it if he had yelled. This quiet, intense voice was something he had only ever heard when Jason was very angry.
"You served as a Ranger longer than any of us. Zordon trusted you with more powers and responsibility than any of us. What right do you have to question how worthy you are when you held the Power longer than the rest of us? What does that say about everyone else?" Jason sighed and looked away. His voice had lost the hard edge when he spoke again, he just sounded sad. "I know what happened to you was horrible, believe me I do, but you can't hold on to it like this. It's insulting to the rest of us, especially Zordon, and more importantly it's not healthy for you to think that way. You were, no are a great Ranger, no matter what you're beginning was and Zordon saw that in you just as surely as he saw it in anyone else."
Tommy stood there for a few seconds longer than abruptly turned and left the apartment, retreating to the backyard to stare up at the cloudless night sky. He didn't know how to react or what to think of how to feel. It was all too muddled and, as much as he would have liked to crawl into Jason's arms, he did not trust himself to keep from saying something stupid that could hurt his lover.
Jason sighed in sadness and frustration as he heard the door close behind his lover. Normally he would go after him but this time...this time Tommy had to decide what to do. He couldn't believe that Tommy could think that way and actually knew it probably wasn't really how he felt.
'Stupid withdrawals' Jason thought. He knew what Tommy was going through on some level; he had gone through Power withdrawals twice himself. After a few hours of what Zordon had told him was something like their bodies going into low grade shock from the loss, that first night they just hit you like a tonne of bricks and the week following was pretty crappy as well. Tommy had to be feeling those bricks.
Mood swings were the first thing to look out for. Jason knew what he could expect to see in Tommy for those. Anger, guilt, depression, loneliness, hopelessness, Tommy's reactions were, from what he had observed during the whole Green Ranger mess, very similar to his own. He just hoped Tommy wouldn't go on crying jags like Trini had in Geneva.
There were other symptoms but they varied from person to person. The only other thing that happened to everyone was the nightmares. Jason shuddered slightly in remembrance of those. That would be difficult especially since it was Tommy. Some of his experiences went far beyond what had haunted Jason's dreams while he was caught in the throes of the withdrawals.
It was late when Tommy came back inside. Jason was, by that time, in bed, browsing over some material from AGU he had received for his upcoming classes. He was having second thoughts about business being his major. It all seemed rather tedious and all he had done was look over the prep material!
For a moment Tommy just stood unsurely at the foot of the bed. Jason smiled, if a bit wanly and put the sheets he had been looking over down. Tommy didn't need anymore of any invitation. He quickly stripped to his boxers and crawled into bed beside Jason.
They didn't touch yet. Tommy lay on his side and Jason on his back. Tommy's face displayed a bit of guilt and shame and apology while Jason's remained impassive.
"Tell me more about the wedding." Tommy requested, after a moment. He needed a safe topic for now. He knew that Jason wouldn't let what had happened before lie but before they got into that he wanted something simple to discuss.
"It was pretty simple. Gina really didn't want a big wedding but with all my relatives there were over a hundred people. I think the Scott family made up about sixty percent of the room." Jason told him, a bit surprised at the inquiry. "Joey wanted me to tell you that they really wished you could have come with me but understand why you didn't. They're planning on dropping in after their honeymoon for a few days for a visit."
"It would have been too uncomfortable Jase..." Tommy started.
"I know." Jason cut him off. "It was awkward at times with just me there. It's okay. They understand and so do I. I wouldn't want you to have to put up with Milton anyway."
"He was that bad?" Tommy questioned, knowing that Jason's uncle reaction to his coming out had been worse than his father's reaction.
"Yeah." Jason sighed. "At the bachelor party he got drunk and it made him really speak his mind. My dad just walked out. He wouldn't even look at me. He didn't speak to me the whole time. Just carried on as though I wasn't there are all."
"Oh, Jase." Tommy murmured. "I'm so sorry."
Jason sighed. "Me too. Joey decked him though."
"Who? Your dad?" Tommy asked.
"No. Milton. He gave him a great right hook to the jaw that knocked him flat on his ass. Then he said he wasn't welcome at his wedding anymore." Jason smiled slightly. He didn't completely approve of Joey's use of the fighting skills he had taught him but it had been a big relief not to have to deal with his bigoted uncle.
Tommy couldn't help but laugh. "That I would have liked to see."
Jason had to grin. "Quite a few of the other people there, the ones who are okay with, well, me, started cheering when Joey and the best man literally threw him out of the place."
"Good." Tommy felt a deep sense of satisfaction over that. At least some of Jason's family weren't bigoted idiots.
Jason smiled slightly in reply and they fell silent for a few moments. Tommy hesitantly reached for Jason's hand. Encouraged when Jason didn't pull away, he scooted closer so they were very nearly touching. Jason's other arm tentatively sneaked around Tommy.
"I'm sorry." Tommy said.
Jason snorted. "Do you even know why you're sorry?"
Tommy fidgeted slightly. He couldn't help but entertain the thought that Jason would make a great father one day, hopefully. "No. Other than I upset you no."
"I was a little harsh too." Jason sighed. "I know you're feeling, well, wonky right now. We both know why you're out of sorts; we've both been through it before. But your tirade, it wasn't just the withdrawals talking. You might not have said anything otherwise but I'm almost glad you did. You can't think like that. You've sacrificed too much to think that it meant nothing to the rest of us, to think you mean nothing to us. We've had this conversation before. More than once. So why is this guilt suddenly back?"
"I don't know." Tommy muttered. He really didn't want to do this and knew Jason probably didn't either. Neither of them really cared much for examining their psyches like this but Tommy knew Jason. If it meant someone he cared for just wasn't right he would sit down and talk it out until the problem was solved. He was bull headed that way even though he wasn't really one for that much introspective.
"You don't know." Jason eyebrow rose. They both knew that answer was not acceptable.
"I don't...I just..." Tommy sighed. "I wasn't ready to give up being a Ranger yet. I mean, I knew it was coming, I knew we had to give it up so we could get on with the rest of our lives at some point I just wasn't ready for that to be now."
"That's understandable. You guys really should have had more warning about the switch." Jason groused. "But it doesn't explain why you feel, well, unwanted by Zordon and basically everyone."
"Dimitri knew we didn't really want to leave yet. Adam even said something to her about it." Tommy chewed his bottom lip in...sorrow? anger? fear? He wasn't exactly sure at the moment. "She didn't really seem to care."
"Dimitri isn't Zordon." Jason said flatly. He had met the new Ranger mentor once and had not been overly fond of the puzzling being. "Dimitri probably didn't understand what she had in you guys. She was probably looking for her own Rangers, not directing Zordon's old ones who didn't need her weirdly worded directions."
"But..."
"No." Jason cut him off. "Don't even start that. Don't think like that. I know you want to but you were put through too much, sacrificed too much, to believe Zordon, or any of us, ever doubted you like that. I know that none of us ever did, not without outside influence. Don't let anyone, yourself included; tell you that you were a bad Ranger. I'll have to kick their ass if they do."
Tommy had to laugh at that. And he did. He laughed hard and long and hysterically until he was clutching Jason, burying his head in his chest and gasping as he fought off the scalding tears that bubbled up from inside him.
"It's okay. It'll be okay." Jason repeated the words over and over again, not sure whether Tommy heard them or not. He held Tommy close, rubbing the back of his neck and trying to comfort him until Tommy seemed to collapse boneless against him, still shuddering with suppressed cries.
Jason waited until Tommy regained control and then led him to the bathroom. Tommy followed listlessly, not really caring what was happening as long as he had Jason to hold on to. A cool, damp washcloth was pressed into his hands. He automatically swiped it across his overheated face, pressing it against his eyes that were stinging from the effort he had put into keeping himself from crying.
He vaguely registered that Jason led him back to their bedroom, pulling him into bed and into his arms. They just lay there for awhile until Jason's arm fell asleep and he had to pull it out from under him.
"Uh..." Tommy moaned in slight protest. He smiled slightly as Jason tried to shake the pins and needles out of his heavy feeling arm.
Jason grimaced slightly for the few seconds before feeling spread back into his limb. He hated that feeling and hated that he had had to pull away from Tommy to get rid of it. Tommy seemed to think it was funny though so he smiled and quickly settled back into the bed, carefully positioning his arm so it wouldn't do that to him again.
"Feeling better?" Jason grinned and pressed a teasing kiss to the smiling lips.
"A bit." Tommy's smile dropped a little. "It's just..."
"Yeah, I know." Jason sighed. "It'll pass."
Tommy snorted. "In about a month."
Jason shrugged. "So then we better enjoy it while you're not being a grouchy jackass, huh?"
Tommy groaned and whacked Jason with a pillow while he laughed. Jason mock scowled at him but it got the scowl got mixed up with his wide grin and laughter which made Tommy laugh harder at the weird expression. Jason shook his head in amusement as Tommy managed to get himself tangled in the bed covers as he finished his little laughing fit.
"Oh man." Tommy managed to gasp as he sprawled on the bed, his mind half on figuring a way to get his foot untangled from the sheets. "I needed that."
"You're one weird guy." Jason commented with a snort.
"Yeah, but you love me anyway." Tommy grinned cheekily and kicked the covers off his foot. He rolled over, intent on closing his heavy eyes and snuggling into Jason's arms, but stopped short and winced when his hand came into contact with the solid chest to soon, jarring his painful wrist.
"Ow." Tommy complained.
Jason caught his arm, carefully avoiding sore spots, and pressed a kiss just above the marred flesh with a teasing smile. "Did that make it better?"
Tommy snorted even as a leer spread across his features. "I know where you can kiss to make it better."
"If I thought you could manage to stay awake until the end I might consider it." Jason replied. He hadn't missed the way Tommy's eyes were drooping and not surprising all things considered.
"I would not fall asleep during that!" Tommy protested even as he sighed in contentment as Jason arms came around him and he was carefully pressed against the hard chest. He couldn't help but close his eyes and savour the moment.
Jason manoeuvred them so Tommy lying partially on top of him, his dark head resting over Jason's heart. One of Tommy's arms crept around his neck as Jason's arm came to rest across his back. The other hand reached for and found the clicker for the small TV in their bedroom.
Tommy opened one eye as the sounds of David Letterman sounded. It was near the end and he had no clue who the guest was but he watched drowsily anyway. He was thinking of attempting to convince Jason that there were better activities they could be doing as the show ended but sometime before Politically Incorrect followed the gap toothed comedian Tommy had drifted off.
***
It was dark.
He didn't like the dark, not this type of total oppressive blackness at least. It reminded him too much of the time he had been being made into Rita's pawn. That cocoon had been suffocating, choking out his goodness and freewill and sense of right as it poured evilness and cruelty down his throat while he fought for air.
He shuddered at that. For a brief moment it felt like he had been back there. Then he was released into this nothingness again.
No light. No sound. No movement. Nothing.
It was beyond creepy.
"Hello?" He called, hoping for an answer he doubted would come. "Is anyone here?"
Nothing.
He hated that.
For a moment he thought about sitting down or walking or something but he wasn't sure if he wouldn't just tumble off the edge of a bottomless pit or something. Knowing his luck he was just a step away from it.
He sighed.
Waiting, standing stock still and waiting, was horrible. Plus he was really jumpy. Even through the nothing he felt something.
He shook his head. That didn't make sense.
But he still knew something was there, something was waiting to spring on him. Hey, why argue with past experience.
He was right, of course, though he didn't sense anything was there until fingers clutched at his shoulders and a voice began to hiss in his ear.
"Ready to play again?"
He would have jumped but those spindly fingers held him firmly in place. He wanted to run but knew already he could not move.
"Play what?" His own voice was thready and trembled.
Another set of those fingers moved, sliding along his throat. If he could have moved he would have shuddered violently.
They traced his neck as if slitting his throat.
"Hide and seek." The voice hissed into his ear as the fingers stopped only to jab at his shoulder. Hard.
"Hide and seek?" He echoed.
"Of course..." The voice was closer now. He could feel the foul breath on his ear and it made his skin revolt.
No one was allowed to touch him like that except his love...
Then the being, no, the thing was gone. He heard skittering laughter that wasn't laughter but something like it perverted by pure darkness. A sickening parody of that happy sound.
"Can't find me. Can't ever find me." The voice taunted from further away, coming from above and below at the same time. There was that horrid, sick sound again. "You're not the one seeking. No. You don't want to find me. But I keep finding you."
Tommy did shudder that time as the thing skittered off to...He didn't know where.
The sound came again. The awful sound. This time to his right. He thought it was his right. He didn't know...
"Yes. I find you. You hate me. You despise me. And I keep coming back. Why? Hmmm...I bet you wonder why?"
"No." He tried to sound strong, firm, in control. But he didn't. He wanted to cry out for help but when he opened his mouth to yell the fingers were back at his neck. Long bony fingers around his neck, just tight enough to be not yet squeezing.
"Shh...You'll ruin the game."
Gone again. Slinking off again. That sound...Didn't come.
He stood still. Waiting. Hoping. Praying. Had it gone?
"No. Never."
He wanted to scream.
"You know why..."
A finger brushed against his temple. If he could move he would have rocked back in sudden pain.
He was there in the cocoon. Evil in liquid form oozing down his throat. He was there in the dark dimension. Bringing the sword down as Jason lay helpless before him. He was there in downtown Angel Grove. Making building crumble at his will. He was there at the lake. Aches and pains and depression coursing through his tired body from his soul tearing loss. He was there at the Command Centre. Unable to stop it from being destroyed. He was there in the chair. Strapped down as jolts of electricity were fed into him. He was there unable to breath. His love killing him as he once tried to kill his love...
He was there...
"You know why..." The voice hissed, this time as if hanging just above his head. "The worst images are your own."
Gone. Please, oh please, stay gone.
"This game tires me." To the left. Getting closer...
No. Stay away.
"No more fun."
Away. Away. Away.
"Time to end."
Please...
"Found you." The voice was there in his ear again, closer than it should be. Too close...
"Shouldn't have let me find you." Something pressed against his back. "But you can't hide. You can't run. I've already got you..."
It was sharp, he thought, a knife. But then if wasn't. It was like the muzzle of a gun. But then it was the tip of Rita's wand. But then it was a power blaster. But then it was....
The tip of his own dagger.
Maybe..Maybe...
He didn't know! He didn't know!
"Good riddance..."
Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop! MAKE IT STOP!!!
Nononononononononononononononono....
Tommy's eyes snapped open and his whole body twitched up as if he had been shocked by an electric current. He could feel droplets of sweat oozing from his pours and every muscle in his body was coiled tight, ready to snap into action at the slightest threat.
It came as a light touch on his shoulder.
Tommy lashed out, quick reflexes were the only thing that kept his 'attacker' from receiving a fist to the nose, and instinctively fell back into a defensive stance. Unfortunately for him he literally fell. Right off the bed he had been lying on and onto the floor.
Tommy scrambled to his feet. His pulse raced so fast it was almost painful and nothing yet broke through his unadulterated panic.
After that dream, Tommy wasn't sure why he hadn't just taken off. He wanted to run but ever fighter's instinct that had ever been driven into him screamed for him to fight back, to confront the vile creature that had attempted to...to...
"It's okay, Tom. It's okay, love. It was just a dream. It wasn't real. You're okay. It's okay."
Things began to snap back into focus. He wasn't trapped in that soulless darkness anymore, the light beside the bed was one, creating a low glow in the bedroom. He wasn't in danger; in fact he was safer than he would be anywhere else. And there was no vile creature haunting him, torturing him, there was only...
"Jason." Tommy's voice was desperately relieved.
...looking at him in concern and speaking in a low soothing voice as he tried to get through to his lover. Tommy lowered his fists and just stood there, shaking, unable to move.
Jason approached him slowly. He cautiously wrapped his arm around Tommy's waist and, when the other man didn't resist, led him back to the bed.
Tommy curled into himself on the bed as Jason arranged the blankets around them and then held him close. For a few moments Tommy just buried his head in the nape of Jason's neck and tried to enjoy the nest of warmth surrounding him.
But it wasn't enough to chase off the chills that still wracked his frame. That dream, that horrible thing, it had just been too intense, too bone chilling and had left him desperately wanting to feel anything other than coldness. He wanted, needed, more warmth. He just...needed to feel more...
Twining his fingers in the short hair at the back of Jason's neck, Tommy began nipping and sucking on the sensitive flesh in front of him. He heard Jason's breathing hitch.
"Tom?"
"Please, Jason. I need...I want..." Tommy's words were interrupted as he began to nip-kiss Jason's throat. Jason moaned as he latched onto one particularly sensitive spot and bit down in earnest. He knew in some part of his foggy mind that he would leave a visible love bite behind but he was past the point of caring.
It wasn't long before Jason had taken control and given Tommy exactly what he needed.
The dream dulled by the excruciating pleasure Jason had just given him, Tommy buried his face in Jason's neck when the broke apart, ending up in the same position he had been in before. This time his body was relaxed though he was still pressed as tightly against Jason as he had been before. He dimly thought of returning the favour but as the blankets were wrapped around both of them again he realized Jason didn't expect or even want him to.
"Feel better?" Jason asked for the second time that night errr...morning.
"Yeah." Tommy replied, wantonly revealing in the nest of warmth surrounding him while he could.
"Want to tell me what that dream was about?" Jason wasn't stupid. He knew what withdrawal induced nightmares were like even if Tommy's appeared to be more violent than any he had ever suffered through. On the other hand, he had woken up and dealt with them alone.
Tommy shook his head. Later he knew he would only because Jason wouldn't let him out of it but the darkness was still on the very edge of his mind, still waiting for a chance to drown him again. He wanted, needed, to stay enfolded in warmth as long as possible to stave it off.
"Okay." Jason murmured, kissing the top of Tommy's forehead lightly before resting his cheek there. His hand still trailed up and down Tommy's back slowly. "Later though?"
"Yeah." Tommy mumbled his voice muffled as he tried to bury further into Jason.
Jason tightened his embrace and wrapped the blankets tighter in response. "You want to try and sleep or just rest like this for awhile?"
"Like this." Tommy murmured. Shivering at the thought of sleep even through he knew he wouldn't be able to stop his eyes from closing soon.
"Okay." Jason sighed ruffling his hair a bit.
Tommy smiled a little. It was beyond helpful to have Jason with him. Waking up from those awful nightmares he had had when the Green Ranger Powers were waning all alone had been damaging at the time. Having Jason, who understood why he had woken up stifling a scream and wouldn't judge him for it, helped to dispel those awful images.
They would both eventually fall asleep and Tommy would inevitably have another nightmare. A revamped version of his battle against Jason in the dark dimension, with a deadly new twist that his lover suffered, was enough to force Tommy awake with a near scream. He had kissed Jason again and again afterward, trying to reassure himself that it was just a dream, that everything was okay and Jason was alive and well.
Jason let him take the reassurance he needed, not that he minded letting Tommy kiss him nearly senseless, and then tried his best to return some comfort. He hoped that Tommy wouldn't leave bruises where he clutched his back and arm but said nothing. If Tommy needed to hold him tightly Jason was not going to deny him that comfort.
After the second nightmare they abandoned the bed, taking some blankets with them and settling down to watch a movie on the couch. Jason would have liked more sleep but Tommy was looking particularly frazzled. There was no way he was going back to sleep that night and Jason really didn't think it would be a good idea to leave him alone.
'Besides,' Jason thought as he stretched out on the couch with Tommy basically lying on top of him. 'I'll probably doze off again but I'll still be right here while he's awake...'
He awoke in the morning to a blue screen on the TV, stiff muscles that protested the night on the couch, and Tommy's limp weight sprawled on top of him. It wasn't the most comfortable position but it was kind of...nice to feel the warm weight pinning him down as Tommy slept, seemingly without disturbing dreams.
Tommy twitched slightly and Jason realized he had made that assumption too soon. He carefully freed one of his arms and gently ghosted it over Tommy's back. It worked. Tommy nuzzled his head against Jason's chest slightly and murmured a few incoherent words before settling.
Jason lay as still as he could for as long as he could but eventually his muscles began to protest too much. He just had to move. He tried to shift his body carefully but it didn't work. Tommy stirred and even as Jason tried to stay still once again the sleep glazed brown eyes opened.
It took them a moment to clear, Tommy was never at his best or sharpest when he first woke up, but when they did a warm, lazy smile spread over his features. He stretched slightly, looked at Jason for a few moments and then rested his head on the broad chest again. Jason smiled, a hand gently moving up Tommy's back and...
He groaned in sudden pain as a muscle in his leg spasmed, reminding him of why he had been trying to move in the first place.
Tommy felt his lover's body stiffened and, quickly looking up, figured out the reason by the grimace that flashed across Jason's face. He hastily got off him. Jason eased himself up and carefully began to stretch out the cramped muscle.
"You okay?" Tommy asked as Jason stood up, trying to work out the remaining kinks in his leg. He shifted slightly himself, the after effects of his last big fight making themselves known.
"Yeah." Jason replied taking the opportunity to stretch out his other stiff muscles as well. "Man, I hate it when that happens."
Tommy snickered. "As much as you hate it when your arm falls asleep?"
"Oh shut up." Jason grumbled around his grin. "You had the more comfortable positions last night both times."
"You make a nice pillow." Tommy teased glad they'd move to the couch just because it meant Jason didn't have an actual pillow to chuck at him.
"You are so...Ow..." Jason grimaced again as he stretched out his shoulders. He had too broad a back to be scrunched on their smallish, second hand couch half the night. The only reason Tommy hadn't come out of the experience worse for wear was because he'd been sprawled all over him. "What about you? You okay?"
"Yeah." Tommy continued after Jason's eyebrow rose in disbelief. "Okay, I'm better than last night at least. I'm still a bit sore and my wrists hurt a bit. I feel kinda...achy all over."
Jason nodded. "Like you're getting over the flu."
"Yeah." Tommy replied.
Jason shrugged that was something neither of them could do anything about. If Tommy just felt like he had the flu he was getting off lucky even. Jason had felt like someone had taken a hammer to his head, a blender to his stomach and attacked the rest of his body with a whole lost of other not nice appliances. He had been told more than once to see a doctor because he looked like death warmed over during the first few weeks of the Peace Conference. Zack had been the one who had felt like he was getting over the flu the first time and Trini...well, Jason didn't want to think about what she likened it to.
"It'll pass." He said.
Tommy smirked. "Yeah, in about a month."
"Didn't we have this conversation before?" Jason grinned.
"Yeah. It ended with me getting a blow job so..." Tommy smiled back cheekily.
Jason snorted. "There were other things that happened in between."
"Nah. Already blocked those out. I only recall the good stuff." Tommy replied as Jason stepped closer to where he was still sitting on the couch.
"Well...there is one thing I think I need to do right now..." Jason's voice bordered on suggestive.
"Which is?" Tommy murmured.
"Check your wrists and re-bandage them. I should have a look at your other injuries too." Jason replied diffusing the mounting excitement in both of them.
"You're such a tease!" Tommy groaned as Jason retrieved the first aid kit from where he'd left it last night. "Way to spoil the moment!"
"If those wrists get infected, which they could easily become, because I don't check them you'll wish I spoiled as many moments as I need to." Jason told him, gently unwrapping the bandages from last night. It was difficult, in some spots they stuck slightly. "You should probably go to the hospital to have someone check them out anyway."
"How the hell would we explain that?" Tommy wondered aloud.
"I have no clue. How are we going to explain you to anyone?" Jason replied.
"The accelerated healing that comes with the power doesn't fade until after the withdrawals are over." Tommy mentioned.
Jason smirked. "I wasn't talking about your injuries..."
Tommy scowled slightly but it didn't hold when Jason leant down and kissed his palm before examining his wrists. His touch was gentle but it didn't stop Tommy from wincing slightly as his fingers brushed over the damaged skin.
"You really should get these looked at Tom." Jason said worriedly. "A couple first aid courses doesn't mean either of us can deal with something like this. Maybe we can show it to your mom..."
"And say what?" Tommy sighed. "That I've been a Ranger since just after we moved here and an evil villain captured me last night and tried to kill me. That would be betraying our identities and besides if I said something like that she'd have me committed."
Jason had to agree with that but... "We could say you were mugged?"
"Like that's anymore believable. She knows I would fight back. She lectured me about not being invincible too many times when we were living in Los Angeles to know I'd try to fight back." Tommy snorted. "Besides where would the wrist injuries come from if I was mugged."
"Well..." Jason sighed. "Villains have taken civilians hostage before and Kat could back you up on it. We could just say you were in the wrong place at the wrong time..."
"Or we could just forget about i...Ow!" Tommy pulled his wrist away from Jason as he prodded his wrist a little less gently.
"Not while touching your wrist gets a reaction like that. There could still be splinters of the rope under your skin. It could get infected easily. So unless you want me dunking you hands in hydrogen peroxide regularly until the burns get better..." Jason warned.
"All right, all right. But you're doing the explaining." Tommy sighed. "You're a stubborn cuss, you know that right?"
Jason snorted. "This from the guy who can't let go of his guilt after four years?"
"Shut up." Tommy grumbled as he blushed slightly.
Jason chuckled and leaned forward to press a teasing kiss to Tommy's lips before saying cheekily, "Don't worry. I still love you."
It wasn't usual for Thomas to go into work on Sundays but someone somewhere had screwed up one of his accounts. Sarah wasn't exactly sure what had happened, she had tuned him out when every other word turned into a muttered curse. She felt sorry for his assistant. The young man trying to climb the corporate ladder was edgy enough as it was from what she seen when she had had to drive Thomas to work because his car died halfway down their street.
It was kind of nice to be able to sit at the table and nurse a cup of coffee without having Thomas trying to steal the crossword from the newspaper she was reading. She wasn't much for peace and quiet, at least not all the time, but once in a while it was pleasant.
Unfortunately, once in a while never lasted long enough.
She heard Tommy and Jason coming when they reached the top of the stairs that led down to their apartment, their normal, teasing banter floating into the upstairs. She smiled slightly, hoping that they weren't coming upstairs because one of them, probably her son, had burnt what was meant to be their breakfast beyond recognition.
"Um...Mom?"
At Tommy's hesitant voice Sarah put down her paper. Her eyes widened at the sight of her son. He looked like he'd been beat up!
"What happened to you?!" She exclaimed getting up immediately.
Before Tommy knew what was going on he was sitting in the just abandoned chair being severely mothered. It was a familiar feeling. He had gotten himself into more than one scrape as a kid and had experienced the overboard behaviour quite often until he'd stopped getting into messes.
"Mom..." He tried to begin.
"Jason can you go and get me some bandages and antiseptic from the bathroom?" Sarah said, interrupting him.
"Sure."
Jason was barely out the kitchen door when Sarah turned to Tommy, overwhelming concern in her eyes and asked with a quiet intensity. "How did this happen?"
Tommy sighed. "It's a long story."
For a moment Sarah was quiet. Then, "Did Jason do this to you?"
All Tommy could do for a few seconds was gape at his mother. His mind couldn't even wrap around the concept. Finally he managed to sputter, "What?!"
"Did Jason hit you?" Sarah asked again with the same quiet intensity.
"No!" Tommy exclaimed, utterly appalled at the suggestion. This was Jason! This was one of the most honourable guys he knew, Zordon's first chosen leader, the person whose values and merits had gotten him into the Peace Conference, and more importantly his best friend and lover! Jason would rather throw himself off a cliff than hurt someone intentionally. "How can you even think of that? This is Jason we're talking about!"
"You must admit this is very suspicious..." Sarah began.
"He wasn't even around when this happened. God, how can you accuse him of something like that? How can you think that little of him?" Tommy was quickly becoming distressed. He had not had a good night at all, the only reason it was bearable was because of Jason, and now his mother was attacking him!
"I've seen it before, Tommy. You know that. You're my son and if you're being hurt I don't care what I thought of the person before." Sarah replied her voice concerned. "How in the world would you get bruises and rope burns like this if..."
"I was held hostage. And Kat can back me up on that." Tommy said through gritted teeth. "We got hijacked by some of the metal things that attack the city. Kat got away I didn't. There have been abductions before; you know that, I was just the unlucky hostage this time. The Power Rangers freed me. Call Kat if you don't believe me."
Sarah raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "That story..."
"Is the truth. Why is that harder to believe than Jason hitting me? Check the paper. The Power Rangers always make a statement if hostages were involved. Call Kat. If Jason was hurting me do you think she'd cover for him? Hell, no! You know Kat better than that. You know Jason better than this." Tommy grimaced. It was too early for this. He was just glad they had called Kat and verified their cover story before coming upstairs...
"Tommy..."
"Uh...Did I miss something?" Jason asked, standing awkwardly in the doorway. Tommy knew he hadn't heard their conversation. He just looked confused. If he had heard what Sarah had said he would have looked hurt.
"Nothing." Tommy answered quickly. He glanced at his mother for a second, hoping she wouldn't say anything. He knew Jason liked his parents a lot, knowing Sarah could think that of him would be painful knowledge.
"Okay." Jason knew there was more to the conversation than he had heard, which was just Sarah saying Tommy's name in a concerned and slightly frustrated way, but was not going to get into it right now.
Sarah took care of her son quickly and silently which was fine with Tommy. He wasn't sure he would be the most civil person. The awkward silence stretched until Jason couldn't stand it anymore.
"Okay, what's going on? Is Tommy hurt that badly? Should we take him to the hospital or something?" He asked the concern in his voice very noticeable.
"Nothing's going on." Tommy nearly growled. Jason eyebrows rose until they threatened to reach his hair.
Sarah looked at him for a moment before replying. "No. I can take care of him. These rope burns are a bit tricky…"
"Don't you dare say I told you so." Tommy interjected quickly shooting Jason a tiny grin.
"…but they aren't too bad. You'll just have to be careful not to let them get infected or to re-open the abrasions." Sarah finished. "I told you so?"
"Jason thought I should show you what happened." Tommy said softly. "Or go to the doctor. He didn't want anything to get infected."
Sarah fell silent again and Tommy didn't say anything more either. Jason didn't pry, just gave him a few confused glances. He thought Tommy was still mad at him for insisting he see someone about his wrists.
Oh well, He thought. I can always make it up to him later... Before Jason had any time to consider just how he would do that Tommy had grabbed him by the arm and was pulling him downstairs.
"Um…Thanks!" Jason managed to say to Sarah by twisting around. He nearly tripped down the stairs because of it. "What's with you?"
"I want to go out." Tommy replied curtly.
"Um…Why?" Jason was thoroughly confused now.
"Because." Tommy said.
"Okay, hold on a minute." Jason planted his feet so Tommy came to a halt. "What is going on? What did I miss because it seems to have been pretty important?"
"Nothing." Tommy said his voice muffled as he put on a long sleeved shirt.
"Bull. Nothing doesn't make you want to get out of here when before all you wanted to do was lie around. Nothing doesn't make you be rude to your mother. What is going on?" Jason demanded.
"Just…" Tommy sighed and paused. He bit his lip and shook his head. "Can I tell you later?"
Jason narrowed his eyes at the suggestion.
"I'll tell you! Don't give me that look! Just…Later, okay?" Tommy requested. He didn't want to explain now. He didn't know how to tell his lover that his mother thought he had beaten him. How in the world do you explain that to someone?
"Oh no. I'm not falling for that again. The last time you told me you'd tell me later I didn't find out for three weeks!" Jason grimaced at the memory.
"That was three years ago and it was supposed to a surprise. It wasn't my fault you walked in at the wrong time and…"
"Tommy, just tell me. If it's bad enough that you're rude to you mom I think I need to know. I'm worried about you." Jason told him.
"I'm fine." Tommy insisted.
"No, you're not." Jason repeated.
"It's just something my mom said, okay?" Tommy said.
"Which was?"
"Can't you just leave it at that?" Tommy asked angrily.
"No." Jason answered.
"She asked me if you'd done this to me! She all but accused you of hurting me, alright?" Tommy spat out. "Are you happy now? Is that good enough? Or do you want what she said word for word?"
Jason stiffened and for a moment looked like someone had hit him. A slight shudder ran through him and he slowly turned away from Tommy.
Tommy felt like hitting something. He knew it wouldn't be easy to tell Jason what his mother had thought. He'd wanted to avoid it entirely. The worst thing he could have done is said it angrily like that. It made him feel like even more of an ass. Not that Jason didn't provoke him into saying it but still…
"Jase…" Tommy tried softly.
Jason was quiet for a few seconds and then let out a long sigh. "Tommy, she was just looking out for you. She's your mother it's her job no matter how old you get. And yeah, it must have looked liked I'd...It must have looked weird and the explanation wasn't the most realistic even if it was mostly true. Plus she's a nurse; she's probably seen some pretty awful things. You can't fault her for that."
"You can't tell me it doesn't bother you she accused you of that!" Tommy exclaimed.
"I'm not saying it doesn't bother me. It does. A lot. It stings that anyone would think I'd hurt someone, especially someone I love, on purpose. God, the thought of it makes my skin crawl but..." Jason sighed. "It's understandable. I probably should have known she's think that. She had every reason to."
Tommy opened his mouth to say something and then stopped, studying Jason for a moment. His back was tensed and he was staring at the floor with an intensity that could light it on fire. The suggestion bothered him far more than he would say but he wasn't going to hold onto if he could help it.
Instead of speaking, Tommy moved forward and slid his arms over Jason's shoulders, kissing the back of his neck softly. Jason sighed softly. "You should apologize to your mom."
"What?" Tommy exclaimed.
"You should apologize to your mom. I don't know what you said to her when she asked you if I hurt you but I'd bet the farm you got defensive really fast. She was just looking after you. Would you have done anything any differently if you were in her place?" Jason asked.
"Probably not." Tommy had to admit. "I still don't like it though."
"I can't say I like it much either." Jason agreed. "I'd never hurt you."
"Well, duh." Tommy said dryly. "She was just worried about me, I guess."
"Good. Now I've got you convinced of that." Jason smirked a little.
Tommy scowled. "You suck, you know that?"
"I thought you liked that?" Jason snickered.
"And you have a grade 9 sense of humour." Tommy told him.
"Oh yeah. You suck was so mature." Jason turned around and kissed Tommy softly. "Are you going to apologize?"
"Yeah, yeah. Later. And don't give me that look again." Tommy protested. "I want to get out of here for awhile."
"To where?" Jason asked.
"I don't know. You're driving." Tommy shrugged. "I don't care where we go."
"Alright."
"Thank you." Tommy replied. He was glad Jason was around to keep him from falling into the doldrums he had after the loss of the green ranger powers but he could over do it!
Tommy closed his eyes with a sigh as Jason pulled out of the driveway. He felt Jason's hand cover his own and smiled slightly. He wasn't feeling all that great, he knew he'd have to apologize to his mom when he got home, he was certain he was going to be grouchy and irritating and moody for awhile...
And for that moment he didn't care.
Jason's thumb started tracing soothing circles on the back of his hand and he relaxed further into the seat. For that moment he could be completely content.
Author's Note: This one is long and it'll have to sustain people for a while because I'm going to focus on getting out chapter for my other stories. And reviews are always, always welcome as our new members to the Forbidden Scenes club. :o) You'll be getting something for this chapter!
Chapter 8
When Jason got home it was already dark outside. He had been out of town, for his cousin's wedding, for the few days. He was a bit worried. The first two nights he had been there he and Tommy had spoken but last night and this morning before he left, Jason hadn't been able to get a hold of him. He wasn't too concerned. After all Ranger business sometimes took awhile, but the niggling fear that something was wrong wouldn't leave him.
The warm lights that were on upstairs contrasted sharply with the darkness peeking through the basement windows. Jason sighed. He would have liked it if Tommy had been home. The wedding had been beautiful and Joey, his cousin, had been so happy he was there but that feeling was only shared by about half of the family. The other half had looked at him with open disgust, some going as far as leaving when he arrived, and one particularly vile uncle of his had gone out of his way to try and make Jason miserable.
That was part of the reason Tommy hadn't gone with him, even though Joey had had been adamant he was more than welcome. They had both agreed that it would be easier for the not accepting but not openly disgusted relatives if only Jason went. Neither liked it but they didn't want to spoil Joey and his bride's special day.
Entering the dark apartment with a sigh, Jason briefly thought about calling Trini and talking to her about the whole thing since Tommy wasn't around. He dropped his duffle bag by the door and began searching for the light switch when...
"You're home early." A surprised voice said softly.
Jason nearly jumped out of his skin. He instinctively fell into a defensive stance before he placed the voice. Why was Tommy sitting alone in the dark? "Yeah. I stayed for the wedding but Uncle Milton," Jason winced, "well; he was as charming as usual."
"Oh. Sorry." Tommy paused slightly and then sighed in relief. "I'm so glad you're here."
"What's wrong?" Jason asked, fumbling for, finding and finally flicking on the light. He nearly gasped. "What the hell happened to you?!"
Tommy was a mess. He had a bruise on his cheek, a cut above his eye and on his chin and Jason was willing to bet that there were more bruises underneath his clothing. Jason knew his lover well and could see in his eyes that any physical pain he felt was nothing compared to his emotional distress. That was what worried him the most.
But Jason wanted to see how badly hurt Tommy was first. He hugged him briefly before inspecting his face tenderly with his fingers. Tommy let him without protest, tilting his head willingly for Jason's gentle ministrations. It was comforting to know Jason was so concerned about him and the small, soothing kisses Jason pressed against his temple helped him to relax.
Jason stripped him of his shirt next, wincing in sympathy at the trail of large bruises that started at his left shoulder and looped around to the small of his back. He was not fond of what he found marring Tommy's wrists either. They also bore bruises all the way around but the way they were cut and chaffed as if a rope had bit into them concerned Jason much more.
When he was satisfied he had found and inspected all of Tommy's injuries, Jason set about fixing him up. He deposited Tommy into a chair and quickly gathered up what he would need. With deft hands he cleaned and bandaged all the small hurts, pressing soothing kisses around anything that made Tommy cringe away from his helping hands. The wrists were the worst. They were very painful even with all the care Jason took.
It was when Jason was bandaging his wrists, after the painstaking task of cleaning them, that Tommy spoke. "I gave up my Powers."
Jason looked up; trying to read his lover's shuttered face. "The transfer was tonight?"
Tommy nodded. "We found out yesterday that we needed to find replacements by tonight."
"That's not a lot of time. Did you find someone?" Jason asked, keeping his tone carefully neutral.
"Yeah. A guy named TJ Johnson." Tommy's eyes were far away. "He reminded me of you; that's why I picked him."
Jason quickly swallowed the lump in his throat that comment brought on. "And these? Where did they come from?" Jason asked, gently cradling Tommy's hurt wrists.
"Divatox managed to capture me. I was knocked out for most of it. When I came to I was hanging over a void. TJ and Cassie, Kat's replacement, rescued me. I think the burns are from struggling against the ropes. I don't remember everything." Tommy's voice was dead. It sounded to Jason as though a piece of him had been ripped away.
They scary thing was that it had been. Jason knew what it was like to give up a set of Powers and Tommy had been a Ranger for so long...Jason sighed and pulled his lover into his arms, being very gentle so he did not hurt him. Tommy snuggled close to him, relishing the warmth and safety of Jason's strong arms. He felt so loved when he was wrapped up in those arms. It felt like coming home again.
Tommy shuddered slightly as he let himself think back to earlier that night. He knew it was time for him to give up being a Ranger. He did want to move on with his life but a part of him would always long for the time when he was a hero. The feeling of the Power still being there, within him, and yet now completely out of his reach, brought back painful memories of his previous Power losses.
When he was losing the Green Ranger powers Zordon had told him that it was impossible for someone to entirely lose or give up any of the power sources the Power Rangers used. They bearer of the power and the power itself had to connect for a source to be of any use. That connection was impossible to break once it was made. Residues of the power would always remain within the person who bore them, though they would not be powerful enough to use or to cause any damage to the person. Still, the feeling of the great powers all the Rangers once held were there, dulled but there.
The remembrance of that conversation had terrified him after Jason had had to give up the gold Ranger power. The thought that the power that had been killing him was still there had scared him badly. It had taken some extra tests from Trey and a lot of reassurance from Zordon to get him to stop worrying.
"What are you thinking, love?" Jason asked as Tommy grew silent.
"Do you think it's true?" Tommy questioned. "All those times Zordon told us 'Once a Ranger, Always a Ranger' do you think that's true?"
"Yes." Jason answered without hesitation. Tommy looked at him unsurely, waiting for clarification. "Tommy, to me being a Ranger was never the powers, it was more than that. The reasons we were picked to be Rangers, the reason Zordon chose us, let us wield all of that power and bear all that responsibility, that's what makes us Rangers. The powers…That was just what physically embodies it. Being a Ranger is something much deeper than that."
To his surprise and concern, Tommy stiffened and shrugged off his arms. He rose and walked away, stopping in the middle of the room and just standing there. Jason briefly thought of going to him but decided to wait, to see what was going on in Tommy's sometimes muddled head before going after him.
For a moment he just stood there in silence, battling demons Jason could not help him fight, and when he turned he was paler than before. "He never chose me."
"What?" Jason did not follow Tommy's train of thought for a moment. 'What the hell does he mea…Oh shit.'
"He never chose me. I was never one of his Rangers. Rita is the one who decided that I would be one because…You know why she chose me dammit!" Tommy started to pace, agitated and beyond distressed that Jason, his Jason, could feel that way. "I know he never cared for me the way he cared for the rest of you, that I was just there because…because…I don't even know why he kept me around for so long. I always respected him so much but I could never…I was never like you guys, I was only a Ranger because of Rita…"
"Stop it." Jason voice was low and commanding. Tommy couldn't remember the last time he had heard that much steel in the normally warm voice. It grabbed and held his attention even though Jason still sat, seemingly relaxed, in the chair.
"You have not been Rita's Ranger since you joined our side, not to the others, not to me and especially not to Zordon." Jason eyes were nearly burning with intensity. To have Tommy think that of them, him, was insulting. "Do you think Zordon would have let you keep those powers if he didn't think you were worthy of them? You think that he wouldn't have found a way to take them from you? Honestly, you were so down when you first joined us all he had to do was ask for you to give them up and you would have handed them over."
"You may have been too wrapped up in your own guilt to see it but he loved you just as much as the rest of us. He saw something in you that you were too blind to see on your own. And you still can't see it! I can! We all can! You just insist on continuing to wallow in the guilt you force upon your self. Get over it already! You were coerced into being evil. We all know that that wasn't you. We've all forgiven you. Just because you can't let go of what happened doesn't mean the rest of us still hold it against you." Jason was mad now. He was mad at Tommy for still holding on to all this and was simply enraged at anyone who had contributed to him having a guilt muscle the size of Russia.
"Do you really think that Zordon would have given you the White Ranger powers, the best powers there were, if he didn't trust you and care for you? Do you really think I would have been willing to step down as leader to anyone except you? Do you think I would have let someone who wasn't worthy look after my team, my family!? If you do that's just fucking insulting." Jason had to spit out the words, but his voice never rose. Tommy thought he would have preferred it if he had yelled. This quiet, intense voice was something he had only ever heard when Jason was very angry.
"You served as a Ranger longer than any of us. Zordon trusted you with more powers and responsibility than any of us. What right do you have to question how worthy you are when you held the Power longer than the rest of us? What does that say about everyone else?" Jason sighed and looked away. His voice had lost the hard edge when he spoke again, he just sounded sad. "I know what happened to you was horrible, believe me I do, but you can't hold on to it like this. It's insulting to the rest of us, especially Zordon, and more importantly it's not healthy for you to think that way. You were, no are a great Ranger, no matter what you're beginning was and Zordon saw that in you just as surely as he saw it in anyone else."
Tommy stood there for a few seconds longer than abruptly turned and left the apartment, retreating to the backyard to stare up at the cloudless night sky. He didn't know how to react or what to think of how to feel. It was all too muddled and, as much as he would have liked to crawl into Jason's arms, he did not trust himself to keep from saying something stupid that could hurt his lover.
Jason sighed in sadness and frustration as he heard the door close behind his lover. Normally he would go after him but this time...this time Tommy had to decide what to do. He couldn't believe that Tommy could think that way and actually knew it probably wasn't really how he felt.
'Stupid withdrawals' Jason thought. He knew what Tommy was going through on some level; he had gone through Power withdrawals twice himself. After a few hours of what Zordon had told him was something like their bodies going into low grade shock from the loss, that first night they just hit you like a tonne of bricks and the week following was pretty crappy as well. Tommy had to be feeling those bricks.
Mood swings were the first thing to look out for. Jason knew what he could expect to see in Tommy for those. Anger, guilt, depression, loneliness, hopelessness, Tommy's reactions were, from what he had observed during the whole Green Ranger mess, very similar to his own. He just hoped Tommy wouldn't go on crying jags like Trini had in Geneva.
There were other symptoms but they varied from person to person. The only other thing that happened to everyone was the nightmares. Jason shuddered slightly in remembrance of those. That would be difficult especially since it was Tommy. Some of his experiences went far beyond what had haunted Jason's dreams while he was caught in the throes of the withdrawals.
It was late when Tommy came back inside. Jason was, by that time, in bed, browsing over some material from AGU he had received for his upcoming classes. He was having second thoughts about business being his major. It all seemed rather tedious and all he had done was look over the prep material!
For a moment Tommy just stood unsurely at the foot of the bed. Jason smiled, if a bit wanly and put the sheets he had been looking over down. Tommy didn't need anymore of any invitation. He quickly stripped to his boxers and crawled into bed beside Jason.
They didn't touch yet. Tommy lay on his side and Jason on his back. Tommy's face displayed a bit of guilt and shame and apology while Jason's remained impassive.
"Tell me more about the wedding." Tommy requested, after a moment. He needed a safe topic for now. He knew that Jason wouldn't let what had happened before lie but before they got into that he wanted something simple to discuss.
"It was pretty simple. Gina really didn't want a big wedding but with all my relatives there were over a hundred people. I think the Scott family made up about sixty percent of the room." Jason told him, a bit surprised at the inquiry. "Joey wanted me to tell you that they really wished you could have come with me but understand why you didn't. They're planning on dropping in after their honeymoon for a few days for a visit."
"It would have been too uncomfortable Jase..." Tommy started.
"I know." Jason cut him off. "It was awkward at times with just me there. It's okay. They understand and so do I. I wouldn't want you to have to put up with Milton anyway."
"He was that bad?" Tommy questioned, knowing that Jason's uncle reaction to his coming out had been worse than his father's reaction.
"Yeah." Jason sighed. "At the bachelor party he got drunk and it made him really speak his mind. My dad just walked out. He wouldn't even look at me. He didn't speak to me the whole time. Just carried on as though I wasn't there are all."
"Oh, Jase." Tommy murmured. "I'm so sorry."
Jason sighed. "Me too. Joey decked him though."
"Who? Your dad?" Tommy asked.
"No. Milton. He gave him a great right hook to the jaw that knocked him flat on his ass. Then he said he wasn't welcome at his wedding anymore." Jason smiled slightly. He didn't completely approve of Joey's use of the fighting skills he had taught him but it had been a big relief not to have to deal with his bigoted uncle.
Tommy couldn't help but laugh. "That I would have liked to see."
Jason had to grin. "Quite a few of the other people there, the ones who are okay with, well, me, started cheering when Joey and the best man literally threw him out of the place."
"Good." Tommy felt a deep sense of satisfaction over that. At least some of Jason's family weren't bigoted idiots.
Jason smiled slightly in reply and they fell silent for a few moments. Tommy hesitantly reached for Jason's hand. Encouraged when Jason didn't pull away, he scooted closer so they were very nearly touching. Jason's other arm tentatively sneaked around Tommy.
"I'm sorry." Tommy said.
Jason snorted. "Do you even know why you're sorry?"
Tommy fidgeted slightly. He couldn't help but entertain the thought that Jason would make a great father one day, hopefully. "No. Other than I upset you no."
"I was a little harsh too." Jason sighed. "I know you're feeling, well, wonky right now. We both know why you're out of sorts; we've both been through it before. But your tirade, it wasn't just the withdrawals talking. You might not have said anything otherwise but I'm almost glad you did. You can't think like that. You've sacrificed too much to think that it meant nothing to the rest of us, to think you mean nothing to us. We've had this conversation before. More than once. So why is this guilt suddenly back?"
"I don't know." Tommy muttered. He really didn't want to do this and knew Jason probably didn't either. Neither of them really cared much for examining their psyches like this but Tommy knew Jason. If it meant someone he cared for just wasn't right he would sit down and talk it out until the problem was solved. He was bull headed that way even though he wasn't really one for that much introspective.
"You don't know." Jason eyebrow rose. They both knew that answer was not acceptable.
"I don't...I just..." Tommy sighed. "I wasn't ready to give up being a Ranger yet. I mean, I knew it was coming, I knew we had to give it up so we could get on with the rest of our lives at some point I just wasn't ready for that to be now."
"That's understandable. You guys really should have had more warning about the switch." Jason groused. "But it doesn't explain why you feel, well, unwanted by Zordon and basically everyone."
"Dimitri knew we didn't really want to leave yet. Adam even said something to her about it." Tommy chewed his bottom lip in...sorrow? anger? fear? He wasn't exactly sure at the moment. "She didn't really seem to care."
"Dimitri isn't Zordon." Jason said flatly. He had met the new Ranger mentor once and had not been overly fond of the puzzling being. "Dimitri probably didn't understand what she had in you guys. She was probably looking for her own Rangers, not directing Zordon's old ones who didn't need her weirdly worded directions."
"But..."
"No." Jason cut him off. "Don't even start that. Don't think like that. I know you want to but you were put through too much, sacrificed too much, to believe Zordon, or any of us, ever doubted you like that. I know that none of us ever did, not without outside influence. Don't let anyone, yourself included; tell you that you were a bad Ranger. I'll have to kick their ass if they do."
Tommy had to laugh at that. And he did. He laughed hard and long and hysterically until he was clutching Jason, burying his head in his chest and gasping as he fought off the scalding tears that bubbled up from inside him.
"It's okay. It'll be okay." Jason repeated the words over and over again, not sure whether Tommy heard them or not. He held Tommy close, rubbing the back of his neck and trying to comfort him until Tommy seemed to collapse boneless against him, still shuddering with suppressed cries.
Jason waited until Tommy regained control and then led him to the bathroom. Tommy followed listlessly, not really caring what was happening as long as he had Jason to hold on to. A cool, damp washcloth was pressed into his hands. He automatically swiped it across his overheated face, pressing it against his eyes that were stinging from the effort he had put into keeping himself from crying.
He vaguely registered that Jason led him back to their bedroom, pulling him into bed and into his arms. They just lay there for awhile until Jason's arm fell asleep and he had to pull it out from under him.
"Uh..." Tommy moaned in slight protest. He smiled slightly as Jason tried to shake the pins and needles out of his heavy feeling arm.
Jason grimaced slightly for the few seconds before feeling spread back into his limb. He hated that feeling and hated that he had had to pull away from Tommy to get rid of it. Tommy seemed to think it was funny though so he smiled and quickly settled back into the bed, carefully positioning his arm so it wouldn't do that to him again.
"Feeling better?" Jason grinned and pressed a teasing kiss to the smiling lips.
"A bit." Tommy's smile dropped a little. "It's just..."
"Yeah, I know." Jason sighed. "It'll pass."
Tommy snorted. "In about a month."
Jason shrugged. "So then we better enjoy it while you're not being a grouchy jackass, huh?"
Tommy groaned and whacked Jason with a pillow while he laughed. Jason mock scowled at him but it got the scowl got mixed up with his wide grin and laughter which made Tommy laugh harder at the weird expression. Jason shook his head in amusement as Tommy managed to get himself tangled in the bed covers as he finished his little laughing fit.
"Oh man." Tommy managed to gasp as he sprawled on the bed, his mind half on figuring a way to get his foot untangled from the sheets. "I needed that."
"You're one weird guy." Jason commented with a snort.
"Yeah, but you love me anyway." Tommy grinned cheekily and kicked the covers off his foot. He rolled over, intent on closing his heavy eyes and snuggling into Jason's arms, but stopped short and winced when his hand came into contact with the solid chest to soon, jarring his painful wrist.
"Ow." Tommy complained.
Jason caught his arm, carefully avoiding sore spots, and pressed a kiss just above the marred flesh with a teasing smile. "Did that make it better?"
Tommy snorted even as a leer spread across his features. "I know where you can kiss to make it better."
"If I thought you could manage to stay awake until the end I might consider it." Jason replied. He hadn't missed the way Tommy's eyes were drooping and not surprising all things considered.
"I would not fall asleep during that!" Tommy protested even as he sighed in contentment as Jason arms came around him and he was carefully pressed against the hard chest. He couldn't help but close his eyes and savour the moment.
Jason manoeuvred them so Tommy lying partially on top of him, his dark head resting over Jason's heart. One of Tommy's arms crept around his neck as Jason's arm came to rest across his back. The other hand reached for and found the clicker for the small TV in their bedroom.
Tommy opened one eye as the sounds of David Letterman sounded. It was near the end and he had no clue who the guest was but he watched drowsily anyway. He was thinking of attempting to convince Jason that there were better activities they could be doing as the show ended but sometime before Politically Incorrect followed the gap toothed comedian Tommy had drifted off.
***
It was dark.
He didn't like the dark, not this type of total oppressive blackness at least. It reminded him too much of the time he had been being made into Rita's pawn. That cocoon had been suffocating, choking out his goodness and freewill and sense of right as it poured evilness and cruelty down his throat while he fought for air.
He shuddered at that. For a brief moment it felt like he had been back there. Then he was released into this nothingness again.
No light. No sound. No movement. Nothing.
It was beyond creepy.
"Hello?" He called, hoping for an answer he doubted would come. "Is anyone here?"
Nothing.
He hated that.
For a moment he thought about sitting down or walking or something but he wasn't sure if he wouldn't just tumble off the edge of a bottomless pit or something. Knowing his luck he was just a step away from it.
He sighed.
Waiting, standing stock still and waiting, was horrible. Plus he was really jumpy. Even through the nothing he felt something.
He shook his head. That didn't make sense.
But he still knew something was there, something was waiting to spring on him. Hey, why argue with past experience.
He was right, of course, though he didn't sense anything was there until fingers clutched at his shoulders and a voice began to hiss in his ear.
"Ready to play again?"
He would have jumped but those spindly fingers held him firmly in place. He wanted to run but knew already he could not move.
"Play what?" His own voice was thready and trembled.
Another set of those fingers moved, sliding along his throat. If he could have moved he would have shuddered violently.
They traced his neck as if slitting his throat.
"Hide and seek." The voice hissed into his ear as the fingers stopped only to jab at his shoulder. Hard.
"Hide and seek?" He echoed.
"Of course..." The voice was closer now. He could feel the foul breath on his ear and it made his skin revolt.
No one was allowed to touch him like that except his love...
Then the being, no, the thing was gone. He heard skittering laughter that wasn't laughter but something like it perverted by pure darkness. A sickening parody of that happy sound.
"Can't find me. Can't ever find me." The voice taunted from further away, coming from above and below at the same time. There was that horrid, sick sound again. "You're not the one seeking. No. You don't want to find me. But I keep finding you."
Tommy did shudder that time as the thing skittered off to...He didn't know where.
The sound came again. The awful sound. This time to his right. He thought it was his right. He didn't know...
"Yes. I find you. You hate me. You despise me. And I keep coming back. Why? Hmmm...I bet you wonder why?"
"No." He tried to sound strong, firm, in control. But he didn't. He wanted to cry out for help but when he opened his mouth to yell the fingers were back at his neck. Long bony fingers around his neck, just tight enough to be not yet squeezing.
"Shh...You'll ruin the game."
Gone again. Slinking off again. That sound...Didn't come.
He stood still. Waiting. Hoping. Praying. Had it gone?
"No. Never."
He wanted to scream.
"You know why..."
A finger brushed against his temple. If he could move he would have rocked back in sudden pain.
He was there in the cocoon. Evil in liquid form oozing down his throat. He was there in the dark dimension. Bringing the sword down as Jason lay helpless before him. He was there in downtown Angel Grove. Making building crumble at his will. He was there at the lake. Aches and pains and depression coursing through his tired body from his soul tearing loss. He was there at the Command Centre. Unable to stop it from being destroyed. He was there in the chair. Strapped down as jolts of electricity were fed into him. He was there unable to breath. His love killing him as he once tried to kill his love...
He was there...
"You know why..." The voice hissed, this time as if hanging just above his head. "The worst images are your own."
Gone. Please, oh please, stay gone.
"This game tires me." To the left. Getting closer...
No. Stay away.
"No more fun."
Away. Away. Away.
"Time to end."
Please...
"Found you." The voice was there in his ear again, closer than it should be. Too close...
"Shouldn't have let me find you." Something pressed against his back. "But you can't hide. You can't run. I've already got you..."
It was sharp, he thought, a knife. But then if wasn't. It was like the muzzle of a gun. But then it was the tip of Rita's wand. But then it was a power blaster. But then it was....
The tip of his own dagger.
Maybe..Maybe...
He didn't know! He didn't know!
"Good riddance..."
Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop! MAKE IT STOP!!!
Nononononononononononononononono....
Tommy's eyes snapped open and his whole body twitched up as if he had been shocked by an electric current. He could feel droplets of sweat oozing from his pours and every muscle in his body was coiled tight, ready to snap into action at the slightest threat.
It came as a light touch on his shoulder.
Tommy lashed out, quick reflexes were the only thing that kept his 'attacker' from receiving a fist to the nose, and instinctively fell back into a defensive stance. Unfortunately for him he literally fell. Right off the bed he had been lying on and onto the floor.
Tommy scrambled to his feet. His pulse raced so fast it was almost painful and nothing yet broke through his unadulterated panic.
After that dream, Tommy wasn't sure why he hadn't just taken off. He wanted to run but ever fighter's instinct that had ever been driven into him screamed for him to fight back, to confront the vile creature that had attempted to...to...
"It's okay, Tom. It's okay, love. It was just a dream. It wasn't real. You're okay. It's okay."
Things began to snap back into focus. He wasn't trapped in that soulless darkness anymore, the light beside the bed was one, creating a low glow in the bedroom. He wasn't in danger; in fact he was safer than he would be anywhere else. And there was no vile creature haunting him, torturing him, there was only...
"Jason." Tommy's voice was desperately relieved.
...looking at him in concern and speaking in a low soothing voice as he tried to get through to his lover. Tommy lowered his fists and just stood there, shaking, unable to move.
Jason approached him slowly. He cautiously wrapped his arm around Tommy's waist and, when the other man didn't resist, led him back to the bed.
Tommy curled into himself on the bed as Jason arranged the blankets around them and then held him close. For a few moments Tommy just buried his head in the nape of Jason's neck and tried to enjoy the nest of warmth surrounding him.
But it wasn't enough to chase off the chills that still wracked his frame. That dream, that horrible thing, it had just been too intense, too bone chilling and had left him desperately wanting to feel anything other than coldness. He wanted, needed, more warmth. He just...needed to feel more...
Twining his fingers in the short hair at the back of Jason's neck, Tommy began nipping and sucking on the sensitive flesh in front of him. He heard Jason's breathing hitch.
"Tom?"
"Please, Jason. I need...I want..." Tommy's words were interrupted as he began to nip-kiss Jason's throat. Jason moaned as he latched onto one particularly sensitive spot and bit down in earnest. He knew in some part of his foggy mind that he would leave a visible love bite behind but he was past the point of caring.
It wasn't long before Jason had taken control and given Tommy exactly what he needed.
The dream dulled by the excruciating pleasure Jason had just given him, Tommy buried his face in Jason's neck when the broke apart, ending up in the same position he had been in before. This time his body was relaxed though he was still pressed as tightly against Jason as he had been before. He dimly thought of returning the favour but as the blankets were wrapped around both of them again he realized Jason didn't expect or even want him to.
"Feel better?" Jason asked for the second time that night errr...morning.
"Yeah." Tommy replied, wantonly revealing in the nest of warmth surrounding him while he could.
"Want to tell me what that dream was about?" Jason wasn't stupid. He knew what withdrawal induced nightmares were like even if Tommy's appeared to be more violent than any he had ever suffered through. On the other hand, he had woken up and dealt with them alone.
Tommy shook his head. Later he knew he would only because Jason wouldn't let him out of it but the darkness was still on the very edge of his mind, still waiting for a chance to drown him again. He wanted, needed, to stay enfolded in warmth as long as possible to stave it off.
"Okay." Jason murmured, kissing the top of Tommy's forehead lightly before resting his cheek there. His hand still trailed up and down Tommy's back slowly. "Later though?"
"Yeah." Tommy mumbled his voice muffled as he tried to bury further into Jason.
Jason tightened his embrace and wrapped the blankets tighter in response. "You want to try and sleep or just rest like this for awhile?"
"Like this." Tommy murmured. Shivering at the thought of sleep even through he knew he wouldn't be able to stop his eyes from closing soon.
"Okay." Jason sighed ruffling his hair a bit.
Tommy smiled a little. It was beyond helpful to have Jason with him. Waking up from those awful nightmares he had had when the Green Ranger Powers were waning all alone had been damaging at the time. Having Jason, who understood why he had woken up stifling a scream and wouldn't judge him for it, helped to dispel those awful images.
They would both eventually fall asleep and Tommy would inevitably have another nightmare. A revamped version of his battle against Jason in the dark dimension, with a deadly new twist that his lover suffered, was enough to force Tommy awake with a near scream. He had kissed Jason again and again afterward, trying to reassure himself that it was just a dream, that everything was okay and Jason was alive and well.
Jason let him take the reassurance he needed, not that he minded letting Tommy kiss him nearly senseless, and then tried his best to return some comfort. He hoped that Tommy wouldn't leave bruises where he clutched his back and arm but said nothing. If Tommy needed to hold him tightly Jason was not going to deny him that comfort.
After the second nightmare they abandoned the bed, taking some blankets with them and settling down to watch a movie on the couch. Jason would have liked more sleep but Tommy was looking particularly frazzled. There was no way he was going back to sleep that night and Jason really didn't think it would be a good idea to leave him alone.
'Besides,' Jason thought as he stretched out on the couch with Tommy basically lying on top of him. 'I'll probably doze off again but I'll still be right here while he's awake...'
He awoke in the morning to a blue screen on the TV, stiff muscles that protested the night on the couch, and Tommy's limp weight sprawled on top of him. It wasn't the most comfortable position but it was kind of...nice to feel the warm weight pinning him down as Tommy slept, seemingly without disturbing dreams.
Tommy twitched slightly and Jason realized he had made that assumption too soon. He carefully freed one of his arms and gently ghosted it over Tommy's back. It worked. Tommy nuzzled his head against Jason's chest slightly and murmured a few incoherent words before settling.
Jason lay as still as he could for as long as he could but eventually his muscles began to protest too much. He just had to move. He tried to shift his body carefully but it didn't work. Tommy stirred and even as Jason tried to stay still once again the sleep glazed brown eyes opened.
It took them a moment to clear, Tommy was never at his best or sharpest when he first woke up, but when they did a warm, lazy smile spread over his features. He stretched slightly, looked at Jason for a few moments and then rested his head on the broad chest again. Jason smiled, a hand gently moving up Tommy's back and...
He groaned in sudden pain as a muscle in his leg spasmed, reminding him of why he had been trying to move in the first place.
Tommy felt his lover's body stiffened and, quickly looking up, figured out the reason by the grimace that flashed across Jason's face. He hastily got off him. Jason eased himself up and carefully began to stretch out the cramped muscle.
"You okay?" Tommy asked as Jason stood up, trying to work out the remaining kinks in his leg. He shifted slightly himself, the after effects of his last big fight making themselves known.
"Yeah." Jason replied taking the opportunity to stretch out his other stiff muscles as well. "Man, I hate it when that happens."
Tommy snickered. "As much as you hate it when your arm falls asleep?"
"Oh shut up." Jason grumbled around his grin. "You had the more comfortable positions last night both times."
"You make a nice pillow." Tommy teased glad they'd move to the couch just because it meant Jason didn't have an actual pillow to chuck at him.
"You are so...Ow..." Jason grimaced again as he stretched out his shoulders. He had too broad a back to be scrunched on their smallish, second hand couch half the night. The only reason Tommy hadn't come out of the experience worse for wear was because he'd been sprawled all over him. "What about you? You okay?"
"Yeah." Tommy continued after Jason's eyebrow rose in disbelief. "Okay, I'm better than last night at least. I'm still a bit sore and my wrists hurt a bit. I feel kinda...achy all over."
Jason nodded. "Like you're getting over the flu."
"Yeah." Tommy replied.
Jason shrugged that was something neither of them could do anything about. If Tommy just felt like he had the flu he was getting off lucky even. Jason had felt like someone had taken a hammer to his head, a blender to his stomach and attacked the rest of his body with a whole lost of other not nice appliances. He had been told more than once to see a doctor because he looked like death warmed over during the first few weeks of the Peace Conference. Zack had been the one who had felt like he was getting over the flu the first time and Trini...well, Jason didn't want to think about what she likened it to.
"It'll pass." He said.
Tommy smirked. "Yeah, in about a month."
"Didn't we have this conversation before?" Jason grinned.
"Yeah. It ended with me getting a blow job so..." Tommy smiled back cheekily.
Jason snorted. "There were other things that happened in between."
"Nah. Already blocked those out. I only recall the good stuff." Tommy replied as Jason stepped closer to where he was still sitting on the couch.
"Well...there is one thing I think I need to do right now..." Jason's voice bordered on suggestive.
"Which is?" Tommy murmured.
"Check your wrists and re-bandage them. I should have a look at your other injuries too." Jason replied diffusing the mounting excitement in both of them.
"You're such a tease!" Tommy groaned as Jason retrieved the first aid kit from where he'd left it last night. "Way to spoil the moment!"
"If those wrists get infected, which they could easily become, because I don't check them you'll wish I spoiled as many moments as I need to." Jason told him, gently unwrapping the bandages from last night. It was difficult, in some spots they stuck slightly. "You should probably go to the hospital to have someone check them out anyway."
"How the hell would we explain that?" Tommy wondered aloud.
"I have no clue. How are we going to explain you to anyone?" Jason replied.
"The accelerated healing that comes with the power doesn't fade until after the withdrawals are over." Tommy mentioned.
Jason smirked. "I wasn't talking about your injuries..."
Tommy scowled slightly but it didn't hold when Jason leant down and kissed his palm before examining his wrists. His touch was gentle but it didn't stop Tommy from wincing slightly as his fingers brushed over the damaged skin.
"You really should get these looked at Tom." Jason said worriedly. "A couple first aid courses doesn't mean either of us can deal with something like this. Maybe we can show it to your mom..."
"And say what?" Tommy sighed. "That I've been a Ranger since just after we moved here and an evil villain captured me last night and tried to kill me. That would be betraying our identities and besides if I said something like that she'd have me committed."
Jason had to agree with that but... "We could say you were mugged?"
"Like that's anymore believable. She knows I would fight back. She lectured me about not being invincible too many times when we were living in Los Angeles to know I'd try to fight back." Tommy snorted. "Besides where would the wrist injuries come from if I was mugged."
"Well..." Jason sighed. "Villains have taken civilians hostage before and Kat could back you up on it. We could just say you were in the wrong place at the wrong time..."
"Or we could just forget about i...Ow!" Tommy pulled his wrist away from Jason as he prodded his wrist a little less gently.
"Not while touching your wrist gets a reaction like that. There could still be splinters of the rope under your skin. It could get infected easily. So unless you want me dunking you hands in hydrogen peroxide regularly until the burns get better..." Jason warned.
"All right, all right. But you're doing the explaining." Tommy sighed. "You're a stubborn cuss, you know that right?"
Jason snorted. "This from the guy who can't let go of his guilt after four years?"
"Shut up." Tommy grumbled as he blushed slightly.
Jason chuckled and leaned forward to press a teasing kiss to Tommy's lips before saying cheekily, "Don't worry. I still love you."
It wasn't usual for Thomas to go into work on Sundays but someone somewhere had screwed up one of his accounts. Sarah wasn't exactly sure what had happened, she had tuned him out when every other word turned into a muttered curse. She felt sorry for his assistant. The young man trying to climb the corporate ladder was edgy enough as it was from what she seen when she had had to drive Thomas to work because his car died halfway down their street.
It was kind of nice to be able to sit at the table and nurse a cup of coffee without having Thomas trying to steal the crossword from the newspaper she was reading. She wasn't much for peace and quiet, at least not all the time, but once in a while it was pleasant.
Unfortunately, once in a while never lasted long enough.
She heard Tommy and Jason coming when they reached the top of the stairs that led down to their apartment, their normal, teasing banter floating into the upstairs. She smiled slightly, hoping that they weren't coming upstairs because one of them, probably her son, had burnt what was meant to be their breakfast beyond recognition.
"Um...Mom?"
At Tommy's hesitant voice Sarah put down her paper. Her eyes widened at the sight of her son. He looked like he'd been beat up!
"What happened to you?!" She exclaimed getting up immediately.
Before Tommy knew what was going on he was sitting in the just abandoned chair being severely mothered. It was a familiar feeling. He had gotten himself into more than one scrape as a kid and had experienced the overboard behaviour quite often until he'd stopped getting into messes.
"Mom..." He tried to begin.
"Jason can you go and get me some bandages and antiseptic from the bathroom?" Sarah said, interrupting him.
"Sure."
Jason was barely out the kitchen door when Sarah turned to Tommy, overwhelming concern in her eyes and asked with a quiet intensity. "How did this happen?"
Tommy sighed. "It's a long story."
For a moment Sarah was quiet. Then, "Did Jason do this to you?"
All Tommy could do for a few seconds was gape at his mother. His mind couldn't even wrap around the concept. Finally he managed to sputter, "What?!"
"Did Jason hit you?" Sarah asked again with the same quiet intensity.
"No!" Tommy exclaimed, utterly appalled at the suggestion. This was Jason! This was one of the most honourable guys he knew, Zordon's first chosen leader, the person whose values and merits had gotten him into the Peace Conference, and more importantly his best friend and lover! Jason would rather throw himself off a cliff than hurt someone intentionally. "How can you even think of that? This is Jason we're talking about!"
"You must admit this is very suspicious..." Sarah began.
"He wasn't even around when this happened. God, how can you accuse him of something like that? How can you think that little of him?" Tommy was quickly becoming distressed. He had not had a good night at all, the only reason it was bearable was because of Jason, and now his mother was attacking him!
"I've seen it before, Tommy. You know that. You're my son and if you're being hurt I don't care what I thought of the person before." Sarah replied her voice concerned. "How in the world would you get bruises and rope burns like this if..."
"I was held hostage. And Kat can back me up on that." Tommy said through gritted teeth. "We got hijacked by some of the metal things that attack the city. Kat got away I didn't. There have been abductions before; you know that, I was just the unlucky hostage this time. The Power Rangers freed me. Call Kat if you don't believe me."
Sarah raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "That story..."
"Is the truth. Why is that harder to believe than Jason hitting me? Check the paper. The Power Rangers always make a statement if hostages were involved. Call Kat. If Jason was hurting me do you think she'd cover for him? Hell, no! You know Kat better than that. You know Jason better than this." Tommy grimaced. It was too early for this. He was just glad they had called Kat and verified their cover story before coming upstairs...
"Tommy..."
"Uh...Did I miss something?" Jason asked, standing awkwardly in the doorway. Tommy knew he hadn't heard their conversation. He just looked confused. If he had heard what Sarah had said he would have looked hurt.
"Nothing." Tommy answered quickly. He glanced at his mother for a second, hoping she wouldn't say anything. He knew Jason liked his parents a lot, knowing Sarah could think that of him would be painful knowledge.
"Okay." Jason knew there was more to the conversation than he had heard, which was just Sarah saying Tommy's name in a concerned and slightly frustrated way, but was not going to get into it right now.
Sarah took care of her son quickly and silently which was fine with Tommy. He wasn't sure he would be the most civil person. The awkward silence stretched until Jason couldn't stand it anymore.
"Okay, what's going on? Is Tommy hurt that badly? Should we take him to the hospital or something?" He asked the concern in his voice very noticeable.
"Nothing's going on." Tommy nearly growled. Jason eyebrows rose until they threatened to reach his hair.
Sarah looked at him for a moment before replying. "No. I can take care of him. These rope burns are a bit tricky…"
"Don't you dare say I told you so." Tommy interjected quickly shooting Jason a tiny grin.
"…but they aren't too bad. You'll just have to be careful not to let them get infected or to re-open the abrasions." Sarah finished. "I told you so?"
"Jason thought I should show you what happened." Tommy said softly. "Or go to the doctor. He didn't want anything to get infected."
Sarah fell silent again and Tommy didn't say anything more either. Jason didn't pry, just gave him a few confused glances. He thought Tommy was still mad at him for insisting he see someone about his wrists.
Oh well, He thought. I can always make it up to him later... Before Jason had any time to consider just how he would do that Tommy had grabbed him by the arm and was pulling him downstairs.
"Um…Thanks!" Jason managed to say to Sarah by twisting around. He nearly tripped down the stairs because of it. "What's with you?"
"I want to go out." Tommy replied curtly.
"Um…Why?" Jason was thoroughly confused now.
"Because." Tommy said.
"Okay, hold on a minute." Jason planted his feet so Tommy came to a halt. "What is going on? What did I miss because it seems to have been pretty important?"
"Nothing." Tommy said his voice muffled as he put on a long sleeved shirt.
"Bull. Nothing doesn't make you want to get out of here when before all you wanted to do was lie around. Nothing doesn't make you be rude to your mother. What is going on?" Jason demanded.
"Just…" Tommy sighed and paused. He bit his lip and shook his head. "Can I tell you later?"
Jason narrowed his eyes at the suggestion.
"I'll tell you! Don't give me that look! Just…Later, okay?" Tommy requested. He didn't want to explain now. He didn't know how to tell his lover that his mother thought he had beaten him. How in the world do you explain that to someone?
"Oh no. I'm not falling for that again. The last time you told me you'd tell me later I didn't find out for three weeks!" Jason grimaced at the memory.
"That was three years ago and it was supposed to a surprise. It wasn't my fault you walked in at the wrong time and…"
"Tommy, just tell me. If it's bad enough that you're rude to you mom I think I need to know. I'm worried about you." Jason told him.
"I'm fine." Tommy insisted.
"No, you're not." Jason repeated.
"It's just something my mom said, okay?" Tommy said.
"Which was?"
"Can't you just leave it at that?" Tommy asked angrily.
"No." Jason answered.
"She asked me if you'd done this to me! She all but accused you of hurting me, alright?" Tommy spat out. "Are you happy now? Is that good enough? Or do you want what she said word for word?"
Jason stiffened and for a moment looked like someone had hit him. A slight shudder ran through him and he slowly turned away from Tommy.
Tommy felt like hitting something. He knew it wouldn't be easy to tell Jason what his mother had thought. He'd wanted to avoid it entirely. The worst thing he could have done is said it angrily like that. It made him feel like even more of an ass. Not that Jason didn't provoke him into saying it but still…
"Jase…" Tommy tried softly.
Jason was quiet for a few seconds and then let out a long sigh. "Tommy, she was just looking out for you. She's your mother it's her job no matter how old you get. And yeah, it must have looked liked I'd...It must have looked weird and the explanation wasn't the most realistic even if it was mostly true. Plus she's a nurse; she's probably seen some pretty awful things. You can't fault her for that."
"You can't tell me it doesn't bother you she accused you of that!" Tommy exclaimed.
"I'm not saying it doesn't bother me. It does. A lot. It stings that anyone would think I'd hurt someone, especially someone I love, on purpose. God, the thought of it makes my skin crawl but..." Jason sighed. "It's understandable. I probably should have known she's think that. She had every reason to."
Tommy opened his mouth to say something and then stopped, studying Jason for a moment. His back was tensed and he was staring at the floor with an intensity that could light it on fire. The suggestion bothered him far more than he would say but he wasn't going to hold onto if he could help it.
Instead of speaking, Tommy moved forward and slid his arms over Jason's shoulders, kissing the back of his neck softly. Jason sighed softly. "You should apologize to your mom."
"What?" Tommy exclaimed.
"You should apologize to your mom. I don't know what you said to her when she asked you if I hurt you but I'd bet the farm you got defensive really fast. She was just looking after you. Would you have done anything any differently if you were in her place?" Jason asked.
"Probably not." Tommy had to admit. "I still don't like it though."
"I can't say I like it much either." Jason agreed. "I'd never hurt you."
"Well, duh." Tommy said dryly. "She was just worried about me, I guess."
"Good. Now I've got you convinced of that." Jason smirked a little.
Tommy scowled. "You suck, you know that?"
"I thought you liked that?" Jason snickered.
"And you have a grade 9 sense of humour." Tommy told him.
"Oh yeah. You suck was so mature." Jason turned around and kissed Tommy softly. "Are you going to apologize?"
"Yeah, yeah. Later. And don't give me that look again." Tommy protested. "I want to get out of here for awhile."
"To where?" Jason asked.
"I don't know. You're driving." Tommy shrugged. "I don't care where we go."
"Alright."
"Thank you." Tommy replied. He was glad Jason was around to keep him from falling into the doldrums he had after the loss of the green ranger powers but he could over do it!
Tommy closed his eyes with a sigh as Jason pulled out of the driveway. He felt Jason's hand cover his own and smiled slightly. He wasn't feeling all that great, he knew he'd have to apologize to his mom when he got home, he was certain he was going to be grouchy and irritating and moody for awhile...
And for that moment he didn't care.
Jason's thumb started tracing soothing circles on the back of his hand and he relaxed further into the seat. For that moment he could be completely content.