Disclaimers: I don't own Fruits Basket, only Tanaka Sey the reporter.

Warning: It contains my twisted humor and the characters being MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR OOC.

Interview IV - Sohma Ritsu aka Sinig Mina

Damn! How stupid she was!

Sey was starving and she hadn't even touched the food Hiro had offered her, she had been to distracted with his attempts to get cozy with her. Oh man...

Her stomach growled.

She knocked wearily on Sinig Mina's door. The sign was heart shaped with pink letters saying, Sinig Mina.

"Come iiiiiiiiin," Mina sang.

She opened the door and a strong scent of perfume struck her, Sey grimaced. God, what a disgusting smell! It was just too... strong! It made her get a headache.

"Why weeeeeelcoooome!" Mina sang.

"Eh, thanks." She looked at Sinig Mina and saw that the actor was wearing a big pink aristocratic dress of the 16th century.

Mina giggled and showed her to sit down on a chair. Mina sat down as well across from her.

"I just looooove to sing opera," Mina once again sang. "I have always wanted to sing on the stage... Father and Mother said it was the evil's work so I never did become an opera singer," Mina said, sadness in his voice.

NOTE: Hard childhood?

"Uhm, they don't think acting is...uhm, evil as well?" she said carefully while taking out her pad and pen.

"Certainly not! Why would they think that?!" Mina said shocked. Because both involves entertainment... Wouldn't acting be even worse? Sey thought.

"Oh, nothing," she said with a nervous laughter.

Mina looked at her strangely. "Oh well, shall we start now my friend?"

"Was your role hard to play?"

Mina laughed. "Oh no! It was not hard at all! I yelled often that was all, it was not difficult! I am after all an opera singer by heart and have a wonderful voice."

"Hah hah hah... Yes, so what is your true age?"

"Tweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeenty-fiiiiiiiveee!" he sang with her arms stretched out dramatically.

Dear God... Mina actually resembled Ritsu slightly, what was up with that awful dress?

Her stomach growled again, this time very loudly.

Mina looked at her disgusted. "W-what was that!? Don't tell me y-you..." his strong voice said.

"No! It was just my stomach, I'm very sorry... It's just... I'm hungry," she blushed.

"Oh, poor dear. I do think I have something for you," he smiled to her and left the room.

NOTE: A truly kind gentle soul.

She glanced at her notes as she waited.

She smiled to herself, Mina was so nice! How wonderful of him to get food for her... He was even better than she had pictured. Too bad his perfume made her sick.

"Here you goooooooo!" Mina said as he entered the room.

She smiled and looked down at the plate of... escargot. Snails?! He had brought her snails! She hated those disgusting slimy things. She hadn't eaten those though... but still, yuck, she didn't want to touch that!

NOTE: Has awful taste in food!

"Why don't you dig in my poor dear?" ^_^

"Heh heh... Yes..." She was feeling dizzy. The escargot gave out a strong scent of garlic and the combination with Mina's perfume was just too much.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

"N-no...." she lazily took up the chopsticks and carefully took a piece up and started to chew. It tasted mostly garlic and the snail was very hard to chew. She swallowed. Ugh! "Yummy... Heh heh... So, shall we continue?"

"If you want."

"Yes, yes, I do want to." She gulped in the water she had gotten to the food. "So, how is your relationship with Honda Tohru?" she took up another piece, she had to do this for Ritsu, she had to eat this for the sake of Fruits Basket! Well, not really, but she needed a noble excuse so she wouldn't feel sick to her stomach.

"An unusual girl I must say, but otherwise she is just fine, we get along well."

"How nice," she said while taking another sip from her drink. "With Ayame then? You admire him very much in the show as Ritsu." With trembling hands she took two pieces at once, my she truly was a brave one.

"He's... unique. Hah hah... I don't hang out with him that much."

"Oh, OK. Uhm, isn't it uncomfortable wearing that dress?"

"Hah hah hah, oh no, not at all! Opera singer were this all the time... I am used to it." He reached for a brush and started to brush his long hair.

"Oh, but you aren't an opera singer?"

He stopped brushing and laughed nervously. "O-of course not... Hah hah hah, (that laugh resembled Ayame's laugh quite much) why would I want to be an opera singer? Hah hah hah..." he looked nervously around and continued to brush his hair.

"Because that was your dream," Sey said confused.

"Oh, yes, yes, that is true... Hah hah hah hah. I guess I have confused you quite a lot. Hah hah hah."

"Uhm, yes you have."

"OK," and that was all he said.

NOTE: A terrible liar.

"What? Could you explain this, what are you talking about?"

"Ehm, nothing, nothing at all. Now shall we continue with the interview?"

"This is part of the interview, we never took a break from it," she said extremely confused by Mina's behavior.

"W-what?! You can't put this in the interview! Are you mad!" He ran to her and tried to take her pad, she snatched it away and held it close to her chest.

"What are you doing?!" She ran around the room being chased by Mina.

"I'll be damned! I will be killed by this! Tortured before of course! Nobody must know this!" he said trying to catch her.

"Why?!"

"WHY!?! BECAUSE I AM A SINNER! Isn't it obvious, must I spell it for you? S-e-n-i-r."

"T-that's not how it is spelled!" She stopped running. "Fine, this won't be in the interview, I can't take this running anymore," she breathed heavily.

"You promise?"

"Yes, I promise."

He smiled. "OK," and then he fainted.  No wonder, those corsets were awful, she had been amazed he had worn such a torture chamber.

After ten minutes he woke up.

"How are you?" she asked. "I asked for help but everyone just said that this happen all the time..."

He touched his head. "I'm fine... I'm used to this..." he jumped up gracefully. "Now shall we continue?"

NOTE: Is in extremely good health.

She looked at him full with wonder. How did he do that? So full of spirit so fast!

"All right, this is my last question, what are you hobbies?"

"Singing, I love singing, but that mustn't you put in. Write that I like playing soccer, uhm and that I spit on the floor, which is what 'real' men do right? Hmm, and say that I like... you know... being with women."

NOTE: O_o

What the hell?

"Uhm, OK, if that is what you want."

"Yes."

"Well, I must go now. Thanks for the interview."

"Mm, bye."

Well that had been quite... unusual.

Phew, well now this interview was over, it had been quite breathtaking.

She smiled as she thought who she would meet next, the handsome wonderful clever Sohma Hatori!

**********

Loooong note time. O_o

Ritsu's voice actor is Tominaga Miina. When I saw "Miina" I thought of Seung Mina, a character in the Soul Caliber/Blade series. (Seung Mina is a girl). I changed Seung to Sinig (or "Sing" because he is a singer here.) I don't want this to be too predictable, that is why I didn't make Ritsu some manly mean guy. Yes, all characters will behave different from what the do in the anime/manga but they don't have to be completely different from what they are there. But please continue to tell me what you think, it is interesting to see what everyone thinks and guesses and it also gives me ideas of my own.

I have no idea how escargot taste, please don't be mad if you love it. I've never eaten it, I only have a friend who has and has told me how it tasted. I apologize if anyone was offended in some way.

Now let me tell you why the dress made Ritsu faint, (he wore a dress from the aristocratic dress of the 16th century). The women (and he wore a woman's clothing) wore corsets that pulled their stomach in as far as it would go. This pushed the organs up. If they were surprised or in some way out of breath they would faint (thus running would also count) because of the lack of oxygen. Don't worry though, Ritsu doesn't pull it that tight (he would have fainted a lot earlier then). Uhm, and he doesn't wear it to make him slim, eh, let's say he has only worn it three times, shall we? Ah, what the heck am I saying? It's just a stupid fan fiction. I don't think I have to reassure anyone he is in safety from that. ^_-

Thanks to all who reviewed. :D