Chapter 10

            "Sev, do you fancy me?" I asked abruptly.

            Sev looked pretty taken aback. We were sitting by the lake, watching the Quidditch team practice. Up until a few seconds, we'd been talking about what a prat our Potions professor, Morrell, was. My sudden change of subject had gobsmacked him completely. He stared at me as if I'd suddenly grown two heads or something.

            "Do you fancy me, Sev?" I repeated impatiently. I was trying to think of something I could do to get James out of my head. Going out with someone else was my best idea so far.

            "I like you, yeah," Sev said cautiously, but he didn't sound over-enthusiastic. But then again, neither was I.

            "Well, good," I said briskly. "Maybe we can go out together then, yeah?"

            Sev laughed nervously. He was hardly jumping at the chance I was offering him, which certainly wasn't doing a whole lot for my ego. "Lily, what's going on?"

            "I'm sorry, Sev," I mumbled. "I just think I need a Slytherin boyfriend."

            "What is going on, Lily?" Sev asked again, looking even more confused. "You're acting all weird."

            "Sorry." I hesitated, wondering how much to tell him. "You know my coach?"

            Sev nodded.

            "Well, I – I nearly kissed him in Hungary," I confessed, my face burning with embarrassment.

            Sev burst out laughing. "Wow!" he exclaimed. "So that's why you need a Slytherin boyfriend?"

            "Well, Abby likes him too, and now she hates me," I finished off gloomily.

            "Look, Lily, you can't plan who you fall for," Sev pointed out. "It just happens." For some reason, he was looking rather gloomy, too. "Look at Barchester fly!"

            I grinned, welcoming the change of subject. "Barchester's an awesome Seeker."

            "I really like Barchester too," Sev agreed.

            "Of course you do," I said. "He's the best Seeker we've had for decades."

            Sev was staring at me in a very strange way. "No, Lily," he said gently. "I really like Barchester."

            For a second or two I didn't understand what he meant. Then, finally, I sussed exactly what he was sating, and my eyes opened wide.

            "What? You mean…?" I couldn't quite get the words out.

            Sev nodded.

            "But you're a pureblood!" I gasped. Which was probably the least helpful thing I could have come up with.

            "I haven't told anyone yet," Sev said quickly. "Only you."

            I sat there in shock. Sev was gay? We'd been mates for years, and I'd never noticed a thing. Then I couldn't help smiling as something suddenly struck me. "God, what's your mum going to say?"

            Sev shrugged, and I finally began to take in what all this meant for him. Gays weren't part of Slytherin culture. Everyone pretended they just didn't exist. The most important thing a Slytherin had to do was to ensure the continuation of pureblood lineages by reproducing. Being gay was probably the single worst thing you could be as a pureblood. I began to comprehend what a twisted life most Slytherins led. Torturing others, killing, was acceptable, commendable even. But being gay was a crime against your ancestors and against the name of Slytherin. What the hell was Sev going to do? At some point in his life, he was going to have to make some difficult choices. I stared at him as if I was seeing him properly for the very first time, knowing that he was going to have the same problems I was having with my family if he wanted to live his own life. Choosing a different lifestyle to the one everyone expected you to have meant big trouble. Suddenly, I didn't feel quite so alone.

            "My cousin thinks you're mad about me," I teased him.

            "I am," Sev replied. "I just don't want to marry you."

            He got up and we walked down the lawns towards the castle, passing Zott and the others playing Quidditch.

            I grinned. "I wonder what those tossers would say if they knew."

            Sev looked alarmed. "Lily, you're not going to tell anyone?"

            "Of course not," I said quickly. "It's Ok, Sev. I mean, it's OK with me…"

            "Well, you fancying your Gryffindor coach is OK with me," Sev said solemnly. "Besides, he's kind of fit!"

            We both burst out laughing. Maybe I could cope. After all, I wasn't the only person in the world who had problems…

            I sneezed really convincingly into my hanky and wiped my nose. Kate looked anxiously at me.

            "You're looking really pale and peaky, Liliana. Go to the  hospital wing," she ordered me. "We'll see you later."

             I nodded, pulling a robe over my pyjamas.

            "Listen, you've got to be back by three o'clock," Cissa whispered in my ear. "I won't be able to keep Kate busy all day."

            I nodded. "I owe you big-time, Ciss."

            It was Sunday, the day of the semi-final, and I'd finally made up my mind that I was going to play. I didn't want to upset Kate and Mike, but how could I possibly keep away? I'd worked my butt off to help the team get through to the semis – I couldn't miss out now. I didn't know what was going to happen in the future. I didn't know if I'd be playing again after today. But I was determined that I wasn't going to miss what might be my last chance to turn out for the Horntails.

            I shuffled along the corridor until I was out of sight of the Slytherin common room, then grabbed my broom and kit from behind the tapestry, did a quick spell that changed my pyjamas to my sports robe, then ran as fast as I could for the secret passage on the third floor. I was cutting it pretty fine, I thought, as I glanced at my watch as I legged it down the corridor. I was going to have to run all the way. I tried not to look at the portrait of Salazar Slytherin I passed. Why did I always have to feel guilty whenever I stood up for myself and made a decision I thought was right, I asked myself crossly.

            I hadn't told James or any of the Horntails that I was coming. As I legged it down the street towards the pitch, an unpleasant thought struck me. Maybe James would be annoyed with me for messing the team around. After all, he needed players he could rely on. I'd told him at the clubhouse that I was off the team – well, that I almost certainly wouldn't be turning up for the semi-final. Maybe he'd get tired of me changing my mind all the time.

            I needn't have worried. By the time I arrived, both teams were already out on the pitch warming up. James spotted me, and I saw his face light up. But all he said was, "So you made it, Evans. Get yourself out on to the pitch right away."

            I jogged out towards the centre circle, broom in hand, feeling all fired up as if I could run a marathon. There was a buzz from the crowd, which was much bigger than  we were normally used to. It made the whole occasion feel much more special. I glanced round the seats, trying to spot Sev, who was coming to give us some support. He was sitting about halfway up the stand, and I was surprised to see that Zott, Matthews and some of the other lads were with him. They'd probably come to eye-up the players, I thought with a grin. I noticed Abby's friend Aaron too, but no Chloe, or any of the other girls form her dorm.

            "Good to see you, Lily," Mel called as I joined the rest of the team. I grinned at her, and looked around for Abby. She was doing loops on the other side of the pitch, pretending she hadn't noticed me and therefore couldn't possibly be ignoring me. As I warmed up I kept glancing over at her nervously. What was going to happen to our goal-scoring partnership if she kept sulking once the match started? The whole team would suffer. I didn't think Abby would be that petty, but I couldn't be sure. She was mad as hell with me.

            "Come on, the Horntails!" roared the crowd, as the ref released the balls and began the match. Well, maybe roared is exaggerating a bit. There weren't enough of them for that. But at least they were cheering us on.

            The first half hour or so was a disaster. Our team was jittery and tense, and we couldn't seem to string more than two passes together. It could just have been nerves because we were playing in the semi-final, but I couldn't help thinking that maybe it was because the others were affected by the atmosphere between Abby and me. I was trying to avoid passing to her because I didn't know how she was going to react, and I think she was doing the same. I had another problem too. One of the Chasers on the opposing team, a girl called Cassie Hindry, was a lot bigger than me, and had taken to following me around the pitch and fouling me whenever possible. I'd got away from her a few times because I was faster, but she'd retaliated by marking me extra-close when she caught up with me. The ref hadn't noticed all the robe-tugging, kicking and nudges, and it was starting to get on my nerves.

            We were being thrashed. After forty-five minutes, the score was 80-20 to them. Our defending was abominable – there were gaps Hagrid could have flown through (if a broom was able to support him, that is.) Steely-eyed, James called for a time-out.

            "I don't expect to see gaps at the back that you could fly a Hippogriff through," he snapped. "And as for you two," his gaze moved to me, then turned to Abby, who'd carefully chosen to stand as far away from me as possible. "Evans, Figg, I want you to start playing as if you're on the same team." His eyes raked over both of us. "You are on the same team, aren't you?"

            We both nodded. As we took to the air again, I stole a glance at Abby. Neither of us had played half as well as we could have done. Although we were good individual players, things really started to happen when our partnership was working. It was up to us to turn this game around.

            The game became fast and furious. The opposing team was pushing forward, trying to get enough goals to annihilate us completely without depending on their hopeless Seeker. But this meant that they kept leaving gaps at the back, and several times Rosmerta, Abby and I managed to make successful runs into the scoring area.

            We were catching up. 100-70. And now, Abby and I were getting into the swing of it. I'd left Cassie Hindry behind yet again, and was thundering down the pitch towards their goalposts. I could see Abby in the scoring area, watching me. I swivelled smoothly to face her, and crossed it straight to her.

            Abby swooped upwards, then dive-bombed downwards, distracting the Keeper and shooting the Quaffle through the nearest hoop in one fluid movement. It was a spectacular goal, and all the other Horntails rushed over to Abby and hugged her in glee. Abby didn't even look at me so I stayed well away from the celebrations, and applauded politely. I felt a bit left out, but I reckoned that if I'd gone over and put my arm around Abby, she'd have punched me on the nose. I was pretty sure that no one had over put one of their own players out of commission in, but there was always a first time.

            Now that Abby had scored spectacularly, I wanted a magnificent goal too. It was getting more difficult to score now as Hindry was becoming frustrated and trying every trick in the book to stop me. She was hassling me again as I sped forward. Dodging a Bludger while I kept an eye on Abby swooping down the wing with the Quaffle. She was too far away to take a shot herself, but I was perfectly positioned, if I could just get away from my opponent.

            The defenders were expecting a straight shot across to me, but Abby outfoxed them. Instead, she chucked it to a spot several feet farther forward. I didn't have time to catch it and make a proper shot of it, because Hindry was too close to me. So, praying this would work, I swivelled on the spot, whacking the Quaffle hard with my broomtail and sending it careening towards the goalpost. The Keeper had no chance, and the crowd went mad as the Quaffle flew through the hoop.

            "YES!" I raced down the pitch, holding on with just my knees, with my arms outstretched and wheeling like a Muggle airplane. The other girls sped after me, whooping and cheering, and we had a massive team hug. Except Abby, who stayed over on the other side of the pitch, applauding politely. Just as I'd done when she'd scored.

            I was really flying now, and nothing and nobody could stop me. Ten minutes later, I'd scored twice more, and was in the process of scoring a third time, soaring forward down the middle of the pitch with the goal in my sights again.

            Suddenly my stomach lurched as I was yanked roughly backwards. Someone had grabbed hold of my sports robe, and they weren't letting go. My broom was straining underneath me, trying to move forwards but being pulled back. I fought to keep my balance, petrified that I was going to fall off my broom onto the grass fifty feet below. "What the hell are you playing at?" I yelled at Cassie Hindry, as the ref came running over.

            Hindry glared at me. "What's the matter, Mudblood?" she sneered.

            I saw all shades of red. I spun, freeing my robes, then bent low over my broom and shot towards her, boiling with rage. I gave her a hard shove with both hands that sent her careening backwards. Her team screeched with rage and began yelling at the ref to sort it out.

            She did her best, but by now we were both too livid to calm down easily. We circled one another warily, waiting for an opening. I swooped underneath her, pulling at her broomtail, and sending her spinning. Angrier than ever, Hindry grabbed a Beater's club from one of her team-mates who was watching the fight enthralled, and lobbed it straight at my head. I dodged it, but while I was concentrating on that, I felt Hindry jostle me from behind, and, unprepared for the blow, my fingers slipped from my broom handle, and I fell, speeding towards the ever closer ground.

            I heard someone yell a hurried cushioning charm, and closed my eyes for the impact. I landed, then barely had time to register any pain before I gratefully blacked out.

            I had just come around when the match finished. The rest of the Horntails rushed into the dressing room singing We Are the Champions, so I knew we had won. I was mightily relieved. If they'd lost through being one girl down, I'd have felt horribly guilty.

            I got some smiles and sympathetic looks, and Becca ruffled my hair, but I couldn't say anything. Then I stiffened as James walked in.

            "Well done," he yelled over all the excited chatter. "You were excellent!" Then he spotted me sitting forlornly on the bench, and his face changed. He strode over to me. "What the hell's wrong with you, Evans?" he shouted. I jumped, and everyone else stopped talking to listen. "I don't want to see anything like that from you again. You're lucky you got off as easily as you did."

            He turned away, dismissing me, and I felt tears pricking at my eyelids. Where did he get off, shouting at me like that? "Right, we've got the Rochester Raptors in the final," James went on. "Give yourself three cheers – hip hip…"

            I didn't join in the cheering. I was shaking with anger, as well as from the effort of trying not to cry. When James walked out of the room, I ran straight after him.

            "Why did you yell at me like that?" I demanded aggressively, as I caught up with him. "You know that girl was out of order!"

            "Lily," James said in a much more reasonable voice, "you could have lost us the tournament. Merlin, you could have died!"

            "But it wasn't my fault," I said, my voice quavering. "You didn't have to shout at me."

            "I'm your coach, Lily," James pointed out. "I have to treat you the same as everyone else. Look, I saw her, fouling you all the time. You just overreacted, that's all."

            This time I started to cry. I couldn't help it. "That's not all," I sobbed. "She called me a Mudblood. But I guess you wouldn't understand what that feels like, would you?"

            Now that I'd started crying, I didn't seem to be able to stop. James pulled me gently into his arms, and I sobbed against his shoulder. After a moment or two, my arms crept around his waist, and I held him tightly.

            "Liliana!"

            I nearly jumped out of my skin. Oh, Salazar's bones, it was Mike.