Not Always As It Seems
Chapter 2
Written by: Stacey
My day started off the same as my others have
been lately. Average. The bad kind I mean. It's never any worse than the day
before, and I'm not worse off than any of the other kids around me, I'm just
always feeling so strangely
down and depressed. Like, well... I
don't know! I have no idea exactly what it is that actually went so wrong with
everything. I used to be a happy kid, from what I can remember anyway!
Something just, went. Maybe it was hitting
the teenage years, even though I
don't specifically remember turning thirteen anything changing. I guess Ill
never know, its just one of those things you cant. I hate that.
I woke to the smiley face of Ultralord from
my many posters. The heroic masked face I so dearly honor and look up to, or
used to. It really hit me that I had a problem when not even a BRAND NEW
EPISODE of Ultralord could
put me in a good mood. I got out of
bed and began my usual daily routine. You know the basic wash/dress/eat thing.
Except there's generally never a smiley parent ushering me out of bed and
cooking my pancakes whilst complaining about the mess my bedroom is or
something parent-ish like that.
Don't get me wrong, I have parents,
well a dad anyway. He can be okay sometimes he's just... I don't really think
he notices that I'm a living thing... he just cares about his alcohol and. Well
that and his TV. Mom… well we never talk about Mom. Not if I want to keep Dad
out of one of his
'moods'. And as long as I am sane
(which I must admit, that's questionable!) I want to keep Dad out of his
'moods' because when he's not in one he usually goes easy on the drinking.
Usually
"Sheen, that you? Why are you up so early?" I heard a deep, rough voice call out.
I sighed. I hope he wasn't going to get all-mad for waking him. "I have school Dad"
His bedroom door opened and my dad appeared
looking tired and messed up. But then he always does so I didn't worry about
it. "School! I never went to school! Just a big fuss over nothing! I mean come
on! I never went to school
and I did pretty well off!"
I nodded, hoping I was convincing enough to make him at least think I was interested in what he had to say. "Ok, I've got to go now."
"Fine then! Go be a fool and get an education!" He scorned.
I don't know what made me say it. It was stupid. It just slipped out.
"Mom would have wanted me to get an education."
"Mom's not here" He said in an icy tone, "I thought you might have noticed that. But still, you never were the smartest kid."
I stood, unsure of what to say next for a moment before picking up my school bag and heading towards the door.
"Son, do me a favour. Call in to the store
for me on the way home?" I made a face at the thought of me always having to be
the one who does all his jobs but then I guess he WAS my dad and I WOULD be a
fool to come in the way of
my dad and his "habits"
so I accepted the ten dollar bill he held out and placed it in my pocket and
headed out of the door.
"HEY SHEEN!" I heard from behind me. I turned and saw Jimmy running up.
"Hey Jimmy" I said unenthusiastically. It's
pretty pathetic that not even my best friend can get me to smile. He started
questioning me about Ultralord in a fake, cheery voice while I answered blankly
not even really registering
the questions properly. I never
really do pay attention to the questions, just somehow manage to register them
and answer. It really wouldn't surprise me if one day I was sat alone and just
started randomly answering questions, I guess that's a problem more to do with
me than with my
so-called-depression. Apparently
crazy and sad are not the best combination, but then I guess sad isn't a good
combination with anything.
Jimmy and I continued to struggle from loss
of words, trying our best to act cool and friendly when really any
conversations with friends always
seemed to be extremely awkward.
It's not really Jimmy, he tries his best to act normal and happy. He actually
leads a pretty normal life from what I can tell, except sometimes he zones out
into deep thought but they cant really
be anything wrong with him I'm
sure, at least I think I'm sure. CRASH.
Jimmy and I found ourselves in a heap on the
floor with Libby and Cindy. I jumped up and brushed myself off quickly in an
attempt to prove that a little fall like that wouldn't affect my strength
(although my arm was really killing!) and held out my arm as an offer to help
Libby up, hoping to myself she wouldn't notice the reddish color that was
slowly creeping onto my cheeks. She pulled a face that made me feel diseased and
got herself up. I quickly hurried off on my own towards the bus stop, probably
leaving
chance for an arguing match between
Jimmy and Cindy, not daring to look back or even lift my head. Sure I'd not
done anything more than offer to help her up, but I felt terribly rejected. I
guess it was acceptable for a beautiful girl like Libby to refuse help from a
guy like me, I'm just a lame, loser, kinda guy everyone likes to laugh at.
Whatever it was it had just added onto my 'List of Many Reasons to Be Unhappy'.
I didn't wasn't anything to worry too much about though, it was all just part
of 'The Average Day in the Life
of Sheen.'