Philosophies of a Homestar Runner
Part Two:
Homestar Runner,
Homeschool Winner,
and Homsar
Everyone knows about Homestar Runner. After all, he appears everywhere on the site and is in every toon! The same goes almost all the way for everyone's favorite ladies' man Homsar, even though half of the people at my school I've talked to don't know him. But only hardcore fans of the site know about Homeschool Winner.
Homeschool's only appeared a couple of times on the site, but never appeared in any toons. However, the only place where he is on the site that doesn't require mild hacking skills in in the game "Dancin' Bubs."
This game, my friends, is ancient. It's been there ever since Bubs was introduced, almost! The main point of the game is to have fun and make the blue skinned man dance his freaky dances in places from a dance hall to even, the pun is probably intended, on top a grave that reads "Your Grave."
When I first played this "game" I noticed in the first background two characters that aren't in any other toons. One was a stange looking girl with a medal on. I guessed she was someone who was a reject character, as with the tall pale guy with the white comma on his blue shirt.
Then it hit me.
The guy in the blue comma shirt looked a lot like Homestar. Minus the fact that, unlike Homestar's enormous underbite, he had an enourmous overbite, more than that of Simpson characters!
So I did some research and, lo and behold, this Homestar lookalike had a name: Homeschool Winner. Apparently this guy, unlike the freakish medal girl, had evolved with the site for a short period of time until around "The Search for the Mellow Dellow."
Yes, Homeschool's first appearance was in Dancin' Bubs, but in the very first character page, he was featured. The first character page was just trading cards of all of the characters at that time, including Homeschool and the Mumbies, whatever they were.
On fansites people started giving Homeschool personalities, ages, and even short bios, concluding that Homeschool was he was Homestar's little brother... Well, not little, per say, since on every site I've gone to Homeschool's been around five inches taller than Homestar. Also, unfortunately, in an interview with the Brothers Chaps, the creators of the site, we find out that Homeschool is nothing but a joke. Then again, isn't Homsar?
But enough background information, on to the theory, shall we?
I'm not going to go in depth with the family tree like I did last time, so I'm just going to say that there was this guy who's last name was Home, he met this girl, and he had this kid.
They named this kid William T. Home, and he was a really intelligent person. In fact, he was so intelligent that he actually took the SATs at age 5 and passed. Unfortunately, his parents started taking advantage of his unusually high IQ, so he figured out a way to make them leave him alone: He played dumb. And not just dumb, but he faked a concussion and started failing all of his tests just to make people treat him normally. He even created his own language that sounded like complete nonsence but was actually complex theories and sentances.
The next child that the two had was named Peter H. Home who was born six years after William. He, unlike his brother, seemed to veer more towards athletics since he gained his father's build and height. In fact, he was so athletically oriented that he focused mainly on that instead of academics. His older brother didn't really like this very much so William unsuccessfully tried many times to teach his little brother, but Peter just didn't get it. Is spite of this, Peter respected William for his intelligence and kept his secret safe.
The two parents then suddenly had another child five years later who they named Andrew E. Home. He ended up having a problem with his growth hormone gland and, during puberty, grew to be seven foot eight inches tall before the condition was subdued.
Unfortunately for the three brothers, their parents suddenly left them once Andrew was in High School. To top it all off, the poor Andrew was shunned by all of his peers for being so tall and was constantly beaten up.
Enraged by this, Peter took his brother out of high school and had William home school him. Now, an important detail that I left out was that, during his High School career, Peter's observant friends noted that he was the star of the track team and that his last name was Home. Thus, Homestar Runner was born. Homestar's older brother ended up getting a hurtful name since he was "stupid" and was anything but athletic, yet he still looked like Homestar. Homsar became his name. Both of the names ended up sticking since both of them liked the names, but when Andrew entered high school, left, and then became homeschooled, his brothers then, being brothers, named him Homeschool Winner as a tribute to this fact.
Now, you may be wondering why we don't see Homeschool that much. This I can explain in a different and easier way.
Homestar is extremely protective of his brother. He may not be bright, but since he's basically raising his brother, his brother got beaten up in high school, and when you add in the fact that he loves his brother like any brother should, you can see that Homestar is scared of how his friends would react to seeing his brother. And by friends I mean people like Strong Bad.
Of course, now Homeschool would be around sixteen or something like that, otherwise a junior in high school, Homestar would be around twenty one, and Homsar would be around twenty seven. This fits with the cartoons also because it seems like everyone is out of school. Now, you may be wondering, "If this is true, then why is Homestar and a lot of the others on a high school team?" and I can answer you by explaining that that isn't really high school, that it's just a community thing. It's something that all of the younger people like Strong Sad, Homestar, and Pom-Pom do in their spare time. And, of course, Coach Z is their coach. Now, if you asked me what they were playing... Then I wouldn't be able to answer you. The only thing I can tell you is that it involves a ball, running, tackling, and isn't football or rugby. Whatever.
Anyway, that is basically it. The next Homestar Theory will be on that of having no arms yet still having the ability to pick up stuff. Thank you and good night. You may all leave. Except for you.
Part Two:
Homestar Runner,
Homeschool Winner,
and Homsar
Everyone knows about Homestar Runner. After all, he appears everywhere on the site and is in every toon! The same goes almost all the way for everyone's favorite ladies' man Homsar, even though half of the people at my school I've talked to don't know him. But only hardcore fans of the site know about Homeschool Winner.
Homeschool's only appeared a couple of times on the site, but never appeared in any toons. However, the only place where he is on the site that doesn't require mild hacking skills in in the game "Dancin' Bubs."
This game, my friends, is ancient. It's been there ever since Bubs was introduced, almost! The main point of the game is to have fun and make the blue skinned man dance his freaky dances in places from a dance hall to even, the pun is probably intended, on top a grave that reads "Your Grave."
When I first played this "game" I noticed in the first background two characters that aren't in any other toons. One was a stange looking girl with a medal on. I guessed she was someone who was a reject character, as with the tall pale guy with the white comma on his blue shirt.
Then it hit me.
The guy in the blue comma shirt looked a lot like Homestar. Minus the fact that, unlike Homestar's enormous underbite, he had an enourmous overbite, more than that of Simpson characters!
So I did some research and, lo and behold, this Homestar lookalike had a name: Homeschool Winner. Apparently this guy, unlike the freakish medal girl, had evolved with the site for a short period of time until around "The Search for the Mellow Dellow."
Yes, Homeschool's first appearance was in Dancin' Bubs, but in the very first character page, he was featured. The first character page was just trading cards of all of the characters at that time, including Homeschool and the Mumbies, whatever they were.
On fansites people started giving Homeschool personalities, ages, and even short bios, concluding that Homeschool was he was Homestar's little brother... Well, not little, per say, since on every site I've gone to Homeschool's been around five inches taller than Homestar. Also, unfortunately, in an interview with the Brothers Chaps, the creators of the site, we find out that Homeschool is nothing but a joke. Then again, isn't Homsar?
But enough background information, on to the theory, shall we?
I'm not going to go in depth with the family tree like I did last time, so I'm just going to say that there was this guy who's last name was Home, he met this girl, and he had this kid.
They named this kid William T. Home, and he was a really intelligent person. In fact, he was so intelligent that he actually took the SATs at age 5 and passed. Unfortunately, his parents started taking advantage of his unusually high IQ, so he figured out a way to make them leave him alone: He played dumb. And not just dumb, but he faked a concussion and started failing all of his tests just to make people treat him normally. He even created his own language that sounded like complete nonsence but was actually complex theories and sentances.
The next child that the two had was named Peter H. Home who was born six years after William. He, unlike his brother, seemed to veer more towards athletics since he gained his father's build and height. In fact, he was so athletically oriented that he focused mainly on that instead of academics. His older brother didn't really like this very much so William unsuccessfully tried many times to teach his little brother, but Peter just didn't get it. Is spite of this, Peter respected William for his intelligence and kept his secret safe.
The two parents then suddenly had another child five years later who they named Andrew E. Home. He ended up having a problem with his growth hormone gland and, during puberty, grew to be seven foot eight inches tall before the condition was subdued.
Unfortunately for the three brothers, their parents suddenly left them once Andrew was in High School. To top it all off, the poor Andrew was shunned by all of his peers for being so tall and was constantly beaten up.
Enraged by this, Peter took his brother out of high school and had William home school him. Now, an important detail that I left out was that, during his High School career, Peter's observant friends noted that he was the star of the track team and that his last name was Home. Thus, Homestar Runner was born. Homestar's older brother ended up getting a hurtful name since he was "stupid" and was anything but athletic, yet he still looked like Homestar. Homsar became his name. Both of the names ended up sticking since both of them liked the names, but when Andrew entered high school, left, and then became homeschooled, his brothers then, being brothers, named him Homeschool Winner as a tribute to this fact.
Now, you may be wondering why we don't see Homeschool that much. This I can explain in a different and easier way.
Homestar is extremely protective of his brother. He may not be bright, but since he's basically raising his brother, his brother got beaten up in high school, and when you add in the fact that he loves his brother like any brother should, you can see that Homestar is scared of how his friends would react to seeing his brother. And by friends I mean people like Strong Bad.
Of course, now Homeschool would be around sixteen or something like that, otherwise a junior in high school, Homestar would be around twenty one, and Homsar would be around twenty seven. This fits with the cartoons also because it seems like everyone is out of school. Now, you may be wondering, "If this is true, then why is Homestar and a lot of the others on a high school team?" and I can answer you by explaining that that isn't really high school, that it's just a community thing. It's something that all of the younger people like Strong Sad, Homestar, and Pom-Pom do in their spare time. And, of course, Coach Z is their coach. Now, if you asked me what they were playing... Then I wouldn't be able to answer you. The only thing I can tell you is that it involves a ball, running, tackling, and isn't football or rugby. Whatever.
Anyway, that is basically it. The next Homestar Theory will be on that of having no arms yet still having the ability to pick up stuff. Thank you and good night. You may all leave. Except for you.