Authors Note: Here is another chapter its kinda long but it gets into stuff... just take a read. I don't think this will be a long fic maybe 8 chapters. I am going to start another Carby fic soon, but brace your self this one will not have kids in it! I just put out a stand alone fic called 'Just to be' I kinda like it, if you have not read it go check it out. (I know I know i'm pimping my fics)
Also for Hate to Love fans the fic should be updated sometime this week before Friday I should be putting my next piece up. I'm just iffy about it. Anyways here is the fic!
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"Mommy, why isn't Chloe going to school today? Is she marrying Baxter?" Sebastian asked with a mischievous smile on his face. "No." I said firmly scanning my house for Sebastian's hat. "Right here mom!" Cole said holding the hat out to me. "Mom, is dad coming back?" He continued. I smiled weakly at my son, hoping that the smile in itself would reassure him that everything would be okay, although right now I was not sure if would be. "Mom." He grew impatient by the second.
"Cole, get out, I'll walk you to the bus stop." He rolled his eyes at me. We walked outside Sebastian held tightly onto my hand Cole walked ahead of us. Danny was suppose to be coming over later today, he had managed to talk to Chloe she was very upset. I don't blame her I did lie to her for her whole life. Danny told me they are on even ground now but Chloe still has anger towards me. She will not talk to me at all and is trying to convince her father to let her live with him. He's also barley speaking to me. He is now staying in his brothers old apartment, he just moved out and he decided to keep it for a little while so that is where Danny is staying. Carter is pretty angry too. He wants to meet Chloe, Danny is against this completely but I can't deny him his rights as a father. The bus pulled up and the kids raced onto it.
* * *
"I don't know why the hell you invited him over here?" Danny said angry, yet quietly.
"He's her fa-" I cut myself off mid sentence. "He wants to meet her." I walk to the stairs and holler for Chloe. "Chloe, come down here for a second." Danny rolls his eyes at me. "I want a blood test Abby." I jolt my head over to face him. I am the one to roll my eyes this time. I hear the doorbell ring and immediately go to answer it while Danny gets Chloe.
Carter is standing there looking defeated he doesn't smile he more cringes. I let him in without saying anything. "Danny is just getting her." I tell him, he nods at me and then walks into the living room to take a seat. I hear Chloe and Danny talking quietly. They walk into the room, Chloe stopping dead in her tracks and staring at Carter. Danny gives me death stares the whole time. Chloe and John lock eyes, she looks angrier then before and attempts to walk away but Danny stops her. "Is that him?" She asks Danny bitterly. He nods solemnly, I stand up to go see her but she won't look at me. "Chloe-" I put my hand on her arm but she brushes it off. "Chloe, do you want to talk to him?" Danny asks.
"No! He's not my father you are I don't want anything to do with him." She says firmly. She puts a nasty spin on the word 'him' making him sound like a mass murder. Carter shakes his head still not saying anything. "Chloe its not like he didn't want anything to do with you-" I start she cuts me off mid sentence.
"It doesn't matter- THAT DOESN'T MATTER!" She is shouting now, tears filling her beautiful brown eyes. "HE DIDN'T WANT ME!" She roughly brushes the tears away from her eyes. "Chloe-" I run after her up the stairs. She slams the door violently in my face. I reach for the knob and turn it slowly. She is lying face down on her bed. Her face in pushed into her pillow I can hear soft cries escaping from her body. Sitting down on the bed I softly begin to speak. "When I was younger I married a man, a mean guy. His name was Richard and he was a piece of- well he was horrible. He cheated on me continually and deliberately tried to make my life a living hell. I started drinking because of my messed up life, I had a mother who was bi polar, I would have to chase her all around the country and bring her back with me to get help just so she could do the exact same thing again. I decided to take a step in my life and go to med school. I started working at County, Richard was paying my med school tuition as I did for him. When one day he cut it off so I was a nurse. I then met Luka, Baxter's dad. We dated for a while. But during this relationship I made a connection, a deep friendship with John Carter. Our relationship grew into a romance about two years later. We dated for a year and things were looking bleak. He took off to Africa, things happened and when he came back he had a pregnant girlfriend. I took this hard. About three weeks after he came back we had a one night stand." I stumble a little on this part. "Uh- that's the night you were concieved. We promised that would never happen again and he did not want anything to do with me. I guess the history and everything," I start to choke up a little. "A week later I met your father and god I loved him he was perfect and you came along nine months later and god so are you, just like him. Carter is your biological father but not your father. He did not raise you or yell at your coach when you were benched on the basketball team." I pause and she turns over and looks at me with a tear stained face that has gone from hard and angry to a little more forgiving or at the leased intrigued. "I never told John because he already had a girlfriend and I lead your father to believe you were his even though I was pregnant three weeks before we had sex. It was a horrible thing I did, but here you are and if you were your fathers then you wouldn't be you. John's girlfriend had complications at the birth of their child but he has two more. Kelsey and Spencer. They are your half brother and sister, this going to be weird for them too Chloe." She sits up and looks at me.
"I- I don't want another dad but I feel like my whole life was a lie you know?" She squints her eyes at me. "In grade one when we did the family history I had Dad's information down there but that's not me. I'm not half Canadian unless of course Carter is." I nod in agreement. "Well maybe you can talk to Carter. When you are ready of course." She nods sadly. "I just wish everything would go back to normal." tear flooded from her eyes streaking her already red tear stained face. "When it was- me, you, Daddy, Cole and Bastian." Her body shook with sobs. She brought up her grey sweater and wiped her face. She sat up straight smiling at me. I pulled her tiny body into a hug bearing my head in her shoulder doing my best not to cry. I wrecked my daughters life, I wrecked my husbands life, Carters life and my sons life. "So-" She started slowly. "Carter was cheating on his girlfriend when you slept with him?" She could barley get the words out.
"Not really honey, they were taking sort of a break. They had an open relationship idea, Carter or I would never do anything like that." It was true. Kem was pregnant with his son but they were on the rocks a little during the pregnancy so they agreed to have an open relationship, the day after Carter and I slept together they decided it was just Kems hormones going nuts and got back together. I had forgotten all about Carter after that. I had gotten over him while he was in the Congo it was just the heat of the moment I guess you could say. "Cole and Sebastian their dad's kids right?"
"Yeah." She smiled at me, I knew that we were not back on track yet but maybe one day we would be. It would take a lot of work and I would have to earn her trust back again but I would do it. I love my children so much. "Can daddy trust you again?" I guess she has so many questions that she didn't get to ask me because of all the anger she had towards me. "I don't know baby." I say pushing a strand of hair out of her face.
* * *
I never got to meet my daughter. Well I guess I did but not formally and I certainly did not get to talk to her. She was very upset at her mother and I. I would have loved to see her if I had known about her. I told Kem about her, she was shocked. She told me that I should tell Spencer and Kelsey I don't think I can. What am I suppose to say? I guess they deserve to know that they have a sister. Kem is going back to the Congo tomorrow, I am going to miss her. We both realize not matter how much we care for each other that we lead different lives. The kids will miss her, but she will come back during the summer and stay for a bit. She said she would be back at Christmas. I walk to the admit desk and flip through a chart aimlessly. I am not even thinking about what I am reading. "Hi." I hear a tiny voice say. It is a girl, bundled up in a heavy winter coat. Her long brown hair hanging gently in front of her face. Her dark brown eyes stare at me like she has a question, an important one. They look sad, upset. Light freckles spot her face. She is pretty and I suddenly realize who it is. "Dr. Carter." She says to me.
"Yeah, Chloe right?" She nods shyly. I look down and see her little brother grasping on to her hand. He is looking around the hospital. They look a little bit alike, he has lighter brown hair though and a big toothless smile. "This is Sebastian my brother." She say lifting the hand of his she is holding. "Hi." I say smiling at the young boy.
"Hi." He says distracted.
"Uh- I just wanted to talk to you, I know the last time I saw you was three weeks ago, but I remember Baxter saying you work here and I wanted to do this in person, and alone but mom and dad wanted me to watch him while they work and Cole is at Karate. Today was the day I got the courage." I can see a faint smile cross her lips then quickly fade away.
"Uh- Come into the lounge. We have chips and pop in there if you or Sebastian want some." I see the little boy look over at me. His eyes lighting up.
"Did you say chips." He says with that toothless smile showing.
"Yeah." I walk towards the lounge and they follow me. Chloe takes a seat on the couch, Sebastian sits close beside her. I grab two cans of soda and two bags of chips. I sit on the chair facing the couch. I smile at her and she looks nervous. Sebastian munches on his chips carelessly, obviously not noticing the tension. "um- I was wondering do you have kids?" She played with her hair, not making eye contact with me. yet I continued to stare intently at her. "Yes. Two. Kelsey who is nine and Spencer who is Five."
"I am five!" Sebastian pipes up. Then he quickly goes back to humming and eating his chips. "Uh- Are your parents still alive?"
"Yeah, my mom and dad are. But I was very close with my Gamma and she died while I was still dating your mother."
"Sorry." She smiles sympathetically.
"My Gamma raised me though."
"Mom says you have a little bit of money." She says shyly. I laugh at this I would hardly say a little bit. "Yeah. A little bit is an understatement." There is a silence that fills the room her eyes dart around for something, anything to concentrate on. She breaks the silence by excusing herself. "Thanks for talking to me I just wanted to know a few things, and tell you that you don't have to be in my life." She stands up, her word stinging more then she knows. Sebastian follows her lead and runs to the door. I stop her and whisper to her. "Your my daughter and I love you as much now as I would if I was present the day of your birth and through out the rest of your life I'm not going anywhere." She doesn't look at me and continues to walk towards the door.
Also for Hate to Love fans the fic should be updated sometime this week before Friday I should be putting my next piece up. I'm just iffy about it. Anyways here is the fic!
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"Mommy, why isn't Chloe going to school today? Is she marrying Baxter?" Sebastian asked with a mischievous smile on his face. "No." I said firmly scanning my house for Sebastian's hat. "Right here mom!" Cole said holding the hat out to me. "Mom, is dad coming back?" He continued. I smiled weakly at my son, hoping that the smile in itself would reassure him that everything would be okay, although right now I was not sure if would be. "Mom." He grew impatient by the second.
"Cole, get out, I'll walk you to the bus stop." He rolled his eyes at me. We walked outside Sebastian held tightly onto my hand Cole walked ahead of us. Danny was suppose to be coming over later today, he had managed to talk to Chloe she was very upset. I don't blame her I did lie to her for her whole life. Danny told me they are on even ground now but Chloe still has anger towards me. She will not talk to me at all and is trying to convince her father to let her live with him. He's also barley speaking to me. He is now staying in his brothers old apartment, he just moved out and he decided to keep it for a little while so that is where Danny is staying. Carter is pretty angry too. He wants to meet Chloe, Danny is against this completely but I can't deny him his rights as a father. The bus pulled up and the kids raced onto it.
* * *
"I don't know why the hell you invited him over here?" Danny said angry, yet quietly.
"He's her fa-" I cut myself off mid sentence. "He wants to meet her." I walk to the stairs and holler for Chloe. "Chloe, come down here for a second." Danny rolls his eyes at me. "I want a blood test Abby." I jolt my head over to face him. I am the one to roll my eyes this time. I hear the doorbell ring and immediately go to answer it while Danny gets Chloe.
Carter is standing there looking defeated he doesn't smile he more cringes. I let him in without saying anything. "Danny is just getting her." I tell him, he nods at me and then walks into the living room to take a seat. I hear Chloe and Danny talking quietly. They walk into the room, Chloe stopping dead in her tracks and staring at Carter. Danny gives me death stares the whole time. Chloe and John lock eyes, she looks angrier then before and attempts to walk away but Danny stops her. "Is that him?" She asks Danny bitterly. He nods solemnly, I stand up to go see her but she won't look at me. "Chloe-" I put my hand on her arm but she brushes it off. "Chloe, do you want to talk to him?" Danny asks.
"No! He's not my father you are I don't want anything to do with him." She says firmly. She puts a nasty spin on the word 'him' making him sound like a mass murder. Carter shakes his head still not saying anything. "Chloe its not like he didn't want anything to do with you-" I start she cuts me off mid sentence.
"It doesn't matter- THAT DOESN'T MATTER!" She is shouting now, tears filling her beautiful brown eyes. "HE DIDN'T WANT ME!" She roughly brushes the tears away from her eyes. "Chloe-" I run after her up the stairs. She slams the door violently in my face. I reach for the knob and turn it slowly. She is lying face down on her bed. Her face in pushed into her pillow I can hear soft cries escaping from her body. Sitting down on the bed I softly begin to speak. "When I was younger I married a man, a mean guy. His name was Richard and he was a piece of- well he was horrible. He cheated on me continually and deliberately tried to make my life a living hell. I started drinking because of my messed up life, I had a mother who was bi polar, I would have to chase her all around the country and bring her back with me to get help just so she could do the exact same thing again. I decided to take a step in my life and go to med school. I started working at County, Richard was paying my med school tuition as I did for him. When one day he cut it off so I was a nurse. I then met Luka, Baxter's dad. We dated for a while. But during this relationship I made a connection, a deep friendship with John Carter. Our relationship grew into a romance about two years later. We dated for a year and things were looking bleak. He took off to Africa, things happened and when he came back he had a pregnant girlfriend. I took this hard. About three weeks after he came back we had a one night stand." I stumble a little on this part. "Uh- that's the night you were concieved. We promised that would never happen again and he did not want anything to do with me. I guess the history and everything," I start to choke up a little. "A week later I met your father and god I loved him he was perfect and you came along nine months later and god so are you, just like him. Carter is your biological father but not your father. He did not raise you or yell at your coach when you were benched on the basketball team." I pause and she turns over and looks at me with a tear stained face that has gone from hard and angry to a little more forgiving or at the leased intrigued. "I never told John because he already had a girlfriend and I lead your father to believe you were his even though I was pregnant three weeks before we had sex. It was a horrible thing I did, but here you are and if you were your fathers then you wouldn't be you. John's girlfriend had complications at the birth of their child but he has two more. Kelsey and Spencer. They are your half brother and sister, this going to be weird for them too Chloe." She sits up and looks at me.
"I- I don't want another dad but I feel like my whole life was a lie you know?" She squints her eyes at me. "In grade one when we did the family history I had Dad's information down there but that's not me. I'm not half Canadian unless of course Carter is." I nod in agreement. "Well maybe you can talk to Carter. When you are ready of course." She nods sadly. "I just wish everything would go back to normal." tear flooded from her eyes streaking her already red tear stained face. "When it was- me, you, Daddy, Cole and Bastian." Her body shook with sobs. She brought up her grey sweater and wiped her face. She sat up straight smiling at me. I pulled her tiny body into a hug bearing my head in her shoulder doing my best not to cry. I wrecked my daughters life, I wrecked my husbands life, Carters life and my sons life. "So-" She started slowly. "Carter was cheating on his girlfriend when you slept with him?" She could barley get the words out.
"Not really honey, they were taking sort of a break. They had an open relationship idea, Carter or I would never do anything like that." It was true. Kem was pregnant with his son but they were on the rocks a little during the pregnancy so they agreed to have an open relationship, the day after Carter and I slept together they decided it was just Kems hormones going nuts and got back together. I had forgotten all about Carter after that. I had gotten over him while he was in the Congo it was just the heat of the moment I guess you could say. "Cole and Sebastian their dad's kids right?"
"Yeah." She smiled at me, I knew that we were not back on track yet but maybe one day we would be. It would take a lot of work and I would have to earn her trust back again but I would do it. I love my children so much. "Can daddy trust you again?" I guess she has so many questions that she didn't get to ask me because of all the anger she had towards me. "I don't know baby." I say pushing a strand of hair out of her face.
* * *
I never got to meet my daughter. Well I guess I did but not formally and I certainly did not get to talk to her. She was very upset at her mother and I. I would have loved to see her if I had known about her. I told Kem about her, she was shocked. She told me that I should tell Spencer and Kelsey I don't think I can. What am I suppose to say? I guess they deserve to know that they have a sister. Kem is going back to the Congo tomorrow, I am going to miss her. We both realize not matter how much we care for each other that we lead different lives. The kids will miss her, but she will come back during the summer and stay for a bit. She said she would be back at Christmas. I walk to the admit desk and flip through a chart aimlessly. I am not even thinking about what I am reading. "Hi." I hear a tiny voice say. It is a girl, bundled up in a heavy winter coat. Her long brown hair hanging gently in front of her face. Her dark brown eyes stare at me like she has a question, an important one. They look sad, upset. Light freckles spot her face. She is pretty and I suddenly realize who it is. "Dr. Carter." She says to me.
"Yeah, Chloe right?" She nods shyly. I look down and see her little brother grasping on to her hand. He is looking around the hospital. They look a little bit alike, he has lighter brown hair though and a big toothless smile. "This is Sebastian my brother." She say lifting the hand of his she is holding. "Hi." I say smiling at the young boy.
"Hi." He says distracted.
"Uh- I just wanted to talk to you, I know the last time I saw you was three weeks ago, but I remember Baxter saying you work here and I wanted to do this in person, and alone but mom and dad wanted me to watch him while they work and Cole is at Karate. Today was the day I got the courage." I can see a faint smile cross her lips then quickly fade away.
"Uh- Come into the lounge. We have chips and pop in there if you or Sebastian want some." I see the little boy look over at me. His eyes lighting up.
"Did you say chips." He says with that toothless smile showing.
"Yeah." I walk towards the lounge and they follow me. Chloe takes a seat on the couch, Sebastian sits close beside her. I grab two cans of soda and two bags of chips. I sit on the chair facing the couch. I smile at her and she looks nervous. Sebastian munches on his chips carelessly, obviously not noticing the tension. "um- I was wondering do you have kids?" She played with her hair, not making eye contact with me. yet I continued to stare intently at her. "Yes. Two. Kelsey who is nine and Spencer who is Five."
"I am five!" Sebastian pipes up. Then he quickly goes back to humming and eating his chips. "Uh- Are your parents still alive?"
"Yeah, my mom and dad are. But I was very close with my Gamma and she died while I was still dating your mother."
"Sorry." She smiles sympathetically.
"My Gamma raised me though."
"Mom says you have a little bit of money." She says shyly. I laugh at this I would hardly say a little bit. "Yeah. A little bit is an understatement." There is a silence that fills the room her eyes dart around for something, anything to concentrate on. She breaks the silence by excusing herself. "Thanks for talking to me I just wanted to know a few things, and tell you that you don't have to be in my life." She stands up, her word stinging more then she knows. Sebastian follows her lead and runs to the door. I stop her and whisper to her. "Your my daughter and I love you as much now as I would if I was present the day of your birth and through out the rest of your life I'm not going anywhere." She doesn't look at me and continues to walk towards the door.