More praise for your reviews:
Elf-Vulcan: Don't ask where the popcorn and Pepsi idea came from! My mind just wanders and it goes into places you wouldn't normally expect. Thanks for the review!
Io, Jupiter's Firey Moon: Glad that it cheered you up. Hope your stomach is better! Enjoy this chapter.
Light-of-halo: You like Faye's outfit? Thanks! I got the idea from an M&M's commercial. I hope you've read the rest of the story!
On with part three!
Spike awoke with a start. He had the vaguest sensation that it was earlier then it was when he fell asleep, but didn't know how that could be. Spike looked at his clock and saw it was noon. How could that be? It was only a few minutes past seven when he had fallen asleep! He couldn't have slept in that long! So what had happened? Spike inhaled the air and caught whiff of something. His mouth began to water. The smell was that of roast turkey! Spike jumped out of bed and ran down the hallway, intent on finding the source of the smell and eating it. When he made it to the living room, a teenage girl in a skirt with long black hair was sitting on a mound of food. She wore a holly wreathe in her hair and had carried an old bow and arrow in her hands. On her back was a quiver with arrows in it.
"Hi there. My name is Kagome Higurashi. I'm the ghost of Christmas present. You must be Spike Spiegal." the girld said. Spike was happy to meet a girl that wasn't crazy like Ed and not a bitchy slut like Faye, but he was still a bit annoyed since now he would have to deal with the present now. Rather then replying to the ghost, he reached for the food but his hand went right through it. Kagome giggled at the cowboy.
"Sorry, but that's just for show." she said. Spike moaned.
"But the smell-!" he began.
"That's the problem with illusory food. It's not real, but it smells real." she said. The food vanished. The girl got up and walked over to Spike. "Touch my bow." she said. Spike obeyed and the room flashed. Spike looked at a nearby clock and saw it now read seven p.m. He watched as Ein and Ed ran by. Ed managed to tackle the corgi and began to tickle him wildly. Ein licked Ed's face affectionately and scrabbled in the air with his paws. From the kitchen came the familiar smell of bell peppers and beef. Kagome walked into the kitchen and loaded an arrow into her bow. She shot it into the pan that Jet was using to cook the bell peppers in. Strangely, an aura surrounded the arrow as if she had fired a laser beam from her bow instead of an arrow. The pan simmered and Jet began to hum "Jingle Bell Rock" under his breath as he cooked.
"What was that?" Spike asked the girl.
"It's a sacred arrow. It has Christmas spirit in it and gives off love and goodness to any meal, as long as it's kindly given." she replied. "It's kind of ironic that I'm giving it to you guys, seeing as you can get pretty selfish when it comes to food."
"Keep your comments to yourself." Spike muttered, lighting up a cigarette. Kagome grabbed it and crushed it in her hands. Spike's jaw dropped open.
"That was the last one I had!" he snarled. Kagome chuckled.
"Sorry, but I can't work in a smoke filled environment. Now let's see how dinner is going." she said. She led Spike into the kitchen where Jet, Ed, Faye and Ein were sitting down to what appeared to be Christmas dinner. It was such a meager meal. Just the usual bell peppers and beef with some rice on the side. Ein, as usual was eating a bowl of dog food. Spike was a bit shocked to see the crew saying grace, something which surely had never been done, but what really baffled him was that he himself was nowhere to be seen. He turned to the ghost.
"Where am I? The only time I missed out on dinner was last night."
The girl glared at him slightly. "You went out to hunt for another bounty. I don't know how you live with yourself Spike. Going bounty hunting on Christmas day instead of spending time with your friends! Hmph! You ought to be ashamed of yourself!" Kagome huffed. Spike did feel a bit bad at what she had said, but was not concerned. They needed the money anyway. He turned back to the dinner table and listened to the conversation.
"I have to admit Ed, this Christmas idea of yours was a pretty good idea." Faye said. How long had it been since Faye had thanked Ed for something? A month? A year? How long?
"Edward is happy that Faye Faye enjoys Edwards idea!" Ed giggled, digging into her peppers.
"Still, it is a shame that Spike isn't here." Jet sighed. Ein looked up from his food bowl and gave Jet a look that seemed to say "Do I really care about him?" and went back to eating.
"Aw, who cares about Spike?!" Faye grunted. "I'm just glad to be enjoying myself for once."
"Well still, he could have joined us. I mean even bounties should come second to being together at this time." Jet said.
"Edward is just happy to have Christmas!" Ed squealed and grabbed Ein up in a tight hug. The corgi wheezed and struggled to free himself. Spike noticed for the first time just how thin Ein was looking. Ein was not as plump as he normally was, and if you looked closely you could just barely see one or two of his ribs.
"What's with Ein?"
"He's thin because you guys can't afford much food and when you do get the good food you never give it to him. Not a single bit."
"Why should I? He's just a dog." Spike snorted. Kagome glared daggers at the man and slipped a necklace with purple beads on it around his neck.
"SIT!!" she commanded. Spike was hurled into the ground.
"What the hell was that for?!" he growled, picking himself up.
"For being mean, now listen to me." she half hissed. Kagome fired an arrow into the wall and a scene appeared before the two of them. In it was a food bowl, but it was old and musty looking. From the looks of it, nobody had eaten out of it for quite awhile.
"What does this mean?" Spike asked.
"This is Ein's food bowl. It's old because nobody has used for a long time. Unless this is altered by the future, he will die."
"YES!!" Spike crowed. He was promptly "sat" again by the ghost of Christmas present.
"Don't be a jerk, alright?" Kagome asked as politely as she could. Spike ignored her and began to walk away. Kagome had finally had enough of the pissy bounty hunter and lost control of herself.
"SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT!!!" she bellowed. Spike slammed into the ground six times and on the sixth "sit" he went flying through the floor and landed in a barrel which had been positioned under a leaky pipe. Spike climbed out, thoroughly soaked. He looked up and the enraged spirit.
"Well I guess I couldn't teach you anything, but if I can't then the next ghost will!" Kagome called down. She jumped down and "sat" Spike one last time for good luck and took the necklace off of him. She walked off into the darkness.
Some time later, Spike woke up. He still hurt from the sitting, but he could still move thankfully. He looked up in search of the ghost, meaning to throttle the girl for doing such a thing to him but saw her not. Instead he found himself looking up at a clock which surely had never been there before. The clock struck twelve. Spike remembered Kagato's words and looked to his side in time to see a tall figure in a black robe gliding towards him.
This chapter was a bit short, but it's tough for me to come up with ideas for the present. And yes I know those prayer beads only work on Inuyasha, but this is a parody, so bear with me please. Hope you like it so far. Next comes my favorite of the three spirits! Cyao!!
Elf-Vulcan: Don't ask where the popcorn and Pepsi idea came from! My mind just wanders and it goes into places you wouldn't normally expect. Thanks for the review!
Io, Jupiter's Firey Moon: Glad that it cheered you up. Hope your stomach is better! Enjoy this chapter.
Light-of-halo: You like Faye's outfit? Thanks! I got the idea from an M&M's commercial. I hope you've read the rest of the story!
On with part three!
Spike awoke with a start. He had the vaguest sensation that it was earlier then it was when he fell asleep, but didn't know how that could be. Spike looked at his clock and saw it was noon. How could that be? It was only a few minutes past seven when he had fallen asleep! He couldn't have slept in that long! So what had happened? Spike inhaled the air and caught whiff of something. His mouth began to water. The smell was that of roast turkey! Spike jumped out of bed and ran down the hallway, intent on finding the source of the smell and eating it. When he made it to the living room, a teenage girl in a skirt with long black hair was sitting on a mound of food. She wore a holly wreathe in her hair and had carried an old bow and arrow in her hands. On her back was a quiver with arrows in it.
"Hi there. My name is Kagome Higurashi. I'm the ghost of Christmas present. You must be Spike Spiegal." the girld said. Spike was happy to meet a girl that wasn't crazy like Ed and not a bitchy slut like Faye, but he was still a bit annoyed since now he would have to deal with the present now. Rather then replying to the ghost, he reached for the food but his hand went right through it. Kagome giggled at the cowboy.
"Sorry, but that's just for show." she said. Spike moaned.
"But the smell-!" he began.
"That's the problem with illusory food. It's not real, but it smells real." she said. The food vanished. The girl got up and walked over to Spike. "Touch my bow." she said. Spike obeyed and the room flashed. Spike looked at a nearby clock and saw it now read seven p.m. He watched as Ein and Ed ran by. Ed managed to tackle the corgi and began to tickle him wildly. Ein licked Ed's face affectionately and scrabbled in the air with his paws. From the kitchen came the familiar smell of bell peppers and beef. Kagome walked into the kitchen and loaded an arrow into her bow. She shot it into the pan that Jet was using to cook the bell peppers in. Strangely, an aura surrounded the arrow as if she had fired a laser beam from her bow instead of an arrow. The pan simmered and Jet began to hum "Jingle Bell Rock" under his breath as he cooked.
"What was that?" Spike asked the girl.
"It's a sacred arrow. It has Christmas spirit in it and gives off love and goodness to any meal, as long as it's kindly given." she replied. "It's kind of ironic that I'm giving it to you guys, seeing as you can get pretty selfish when it comes to food."
"Keep your comments to yourself." Spike muttered, lighting up a cigarette. Kagome grabbed it and crushed it in her hands. Spike's jaw dropped open.
"That was the last one I had!" he snarled. Kagome chuckled.
"Sorry, but I can't work in a smoke filled environment. Now let's see how dinner is going." she said. She led Spike into the kitchen where Jet, Ed, Faye and Ein were sitting down to what appeared to be Christmas dinner. It was such a meager meal. Just the usual bell peppers and beef with some rice on the side. Ein, as usual was eating a bowl of dog food. Spike was a bit shocked to see the crew saying grace, something which surely had never been done, but what really baffled him was that he himself was nowhere to be seen. He turned to the ghost.
"Where am I? The only time I missed out on dinner was last night."
The girl glared at him slightly. "You went out to hunt for another bounty. I don't know how you live with yourself Spike. Going bounty hunting on Christmas day instead of spending time with your friends! Hmph! You ought to be ashamed of yourself!" Kagome huffed. Spike did feel a bit bad at what she had said, but was not concerned. They needed the money anyway. He turned back to the dinner table and listened to the conversation.
"I have to admit Ed, this Christmas idea of yours was a pretty good idea." Faye said. How long had it been since Faye had thanked Ed for something? A month? A year? How long?
"Edward is happy that Faye Faye enjoys Edwards idea!" Ed giggled, digging into her peppers.
"Still, it is a shame that Spike isn't here." Jet sighed. Ein looked up from his food bowl and gave Jet a look that seemed to say "Do I really care about him?" and went back to eating.
"Aw, who cares about Spike?!" Faye grunted. "I'm just glad to be enjoying myself for once."
"Well still, he could have joined us. I mean even bounties should come second to being together at this time." Jet said.
"Edward is just happy to have Christmas!" Ed squealed and grabbed Ein up in a tight hug. The corgi wheezed and struggled to free himself. Spike noticed for the first time just how thin Ein was looking. Ein was not as plump as he normally was, and if you looked closely you could just barely see one or two of his ribs.
"What's with Ein?"
"He's thin because you guys can't afford much food and when you do get the good food you never give it to him. Not a single bit."
"Why should I? He's just a dog." Spike snorted. Kagome glared daggers at the man and slipped a necklace with purple beads on it around his neck.
"SIT!!" she commanded. Spike was hurled into the ground.
"What the hell was that for?!" he growled, picking himself up.
"For being mean, now listen to me." she half hissed. Kagome fired an arrow into the wall and a scene appeared before the two of them. In it was a food bowl, but it was old and musty looking. From the looks of it, nobody had eaten out of it for quite awhile.
"What does this mean?" Spike asked.
"This is Ein's food bowl. It's old because nobody has used for a long time. Unless this is altered by the future, he will die."
"YES!!" Spike crowed. He was promptly "sat" again by the ghost of Christmas present.
"Don't be a jerk, alright?" Kagome asked as politely as she could. Spike ignored her and began to walk away. Kagome had finally had enough of the pissy bounty hunter and lost control of herself.
"SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT!!!" she bellowed. Spike slammed into the ground six times and on the sixth "sit" he went flying through the floor and landed in a barrel which had been positioned under a leaky pipe. Spike climbed out, thoroughly soaked. He looked up and the enraged spirit.
"Well I guess I couldn't teach you anything, but if I can't then the next ghost will!" Kagome called down. She jumped down and "sat" Spike one last time for good luck and took the necklace off of him. She walked off into the darkness.
Some time later, Spike woke up. He still hurt from the sitting, but he could still move thankfully. He looked up in search of the ghost, meaning to throttle the girl for doing such a thing to him but saw her not. Instead he found himself looking up at a clock which surely had never been there before. The clock struck twelve. Spike remembered Kagato's words and looked to his side in time to see a tall figure in a black robe gliding towards him.
This chapter was a bit short, but it's tough for me to come up with ideas for the present. And yes I know those prayer beads only work on Inuyasha, but this is a parody, so bear with me please. Hope you like it so far. Next comes my favorite of the three spirits! Cyao!!