AN So here is the second. As you may notice, the order of appearande is the order of how

the generals died. I find these little stories so sad. I cried writing them.

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These are my favorite cookies. I never knew, how I got the recipe. But now I know.

I found it strange, for a man to feel at home in a kitchen. Then again, it is odd

the strongest and most violent of the Senshi loves to do something as down to earth as

cooking.

You, however, fit perfectly there. I never had so much fun as the first time I

saw you. You were pissed because you thought I wanted to take over 'your' kitchen. It

turned out alright. We ended up covered in flour and a few eggs made the floor very

slippery, but the result was worth it. Not only were the cookies to die for, so was

your kiss.

I still can't believe you kissed me right then and there. After all, we had known

each other for barely an hour, and my princess had told me you were withdrawn and stiff.

But I guess I got to see your soft side then.

I had never met anyone like you. You intrigued me. You were so much different

from every man I knew and had met. For some reason they seemed to fear my strength, or

tried to surpass it. Of course they failed. But you took me as me. You excepted the fact

I was stronger than you, but that was it.

In this new world I was always alone. And the hole in me could not be filled.

Until I met Usagi and learned I was a Senshi. Becoming Sailor Jupiter fulfilled something

inside of me, but something was missing. I never knew until it was too late.

What use is physical strength, if you can't save the one you love? I couldn't

then, I couldn't now. Both your deaths keep repeating in my head, over and over again.

I can't help but wonder. What if we could have lifted Beryl's spell? Would it be

like it used to? I know it would have been different from what is now.

I have the best friends in the world. My fellow Senshi are closer to me than a

sister could be. Usagi most of all. Yet I cannot help but be angry and jealous. I know

losing her love to the darkness is difficult. I know very well! But she at least has

hopes of gaining him back.

I, however, have lost you forever. And I did it. Again I killed you.

Again.

I don't know how, but I distance myself from it all, more and more, and try to

focus on my life as it is now. It does not do to dwell on the past.

Maybe I'm staring to harden more and more. In this life, I lost my parents at a

early age. I found the most wonderful friends, in time, and I became a superhero. At

least I had an outlet for my aggression and I didn't get into any trouble at school

any more. But then I destroyed the only love I would ever experience without even

knowing it.

So maybe I have hardened. But sometimes I wish you were there. To hold me like

you used to. You were albe to take all my troubles away and fill me only with happiness.

Now all I have are the memories of those times. And I cherish them with all my

heart. They are all I have left of you. I picture the smell of your hair on my pillow.

I imagine hearing your heart beat underneath my ear. But I know it is all a lie.

Then why do I keep hoping?