Ok, another chapter. Yes, it may not be good, but it's fun to write so
read it!
Disclaimer: all to J.K. Rowling
~`~`~`~`~ Chapter 2 ~`~`~`~`~
As the class made their way to the Great Hall, Hermione couldn't help but wonder what had happened inside of Snape's classroom. Had it been some sort of curse, or a potion gone awry, or was everybody just seeing too many musicals?
She looked to Harry, who, by the expression on his face, was just as confused as she was. "What happened in there?" she asked him without really expecting an answer.
He shrugged. "I dunno, but it seemed perfectly natural, didn't it? Like we just had to sing and the words just sort of popped into your head. I knew what Snape was going to say before he said it. It was weird."
Ron, interrupting of course, said, "But it was pretty funny though, right? I mean, did you see the look on Snape's face? He looked about ready to die. I don't think I've ever seen him like that before." He and Harry laughed. "I'd bet all my money that if he ever has to sing again, he'll kill himself."
With a withering glance at her friends, she began to sort through her book bag as they walked. With a cry of triumph, she pulled out her timetable. "Ah, here it is! All right, we just got out of Potions, so next we have...Transfiguration. Oh that's good. I do love a good transfiguration."
Ron rolled his eyes. "You, Hermione, love anything that somehow relates to school. Don't you know how to have fun?"
She glared at him from over her timetable. "Of course I do, Ron. What else could you call all that time in the library?"
Ron and Harry laughed just as a swell of music engulfed them. Ron began to sing.
"You need a life, mother,
You need laughs, sister,
We've got freedom, brother,
She needs good times, man,"
He turned to Harry with a dumbfounded look as Harry took over the song.
You need crazy ways, daughter,
You need million dollar charm, cousin,
You've got headaches, and toothaches
And we're getting bad times too
From you."
Now, in perfect unison:
"You've got your hair
You've got your head
You got your brains
You got your ears
You got your eyes
You got your nose
You got your mouth
You got your teeth
You've got your tongue
You've got your chin
You've got your neck
You've got your tits
You got your heart
You got your soul
You got your back
You've got your ass!"
Hermione stared at them in shock as passing people laughed at the two singing Gryffindors. They looked completely embarrassed by what they were saying, but could do nothing to stop it, no matter what they tried. The song just kept coming.
"You've got your arms
You've got your hands
Got your fingers got your legs
Got your feet got your toes
Got your liver
Got your blood.
But you need life, mother
You need laughs sister
We've got freedom brother
And you need good times, good times, man
You need crazy ways, daughter
You need million dollar charm, cousin
You've got headaches and toothaches
And we've got bad times too
From you.
Aaaah!"
They began to dance wildly around the corridor as students cheered them on and laughed at Hermione's horrified expression.
"Got your hair, got your head
Got your brains, got your ears
Got your eyes got your nose
Got your mouth
You got your teeth.
Got your tongue got your chin
Got your neck got your tits
Got your heart got your soul your back
You got your ass!
You've got your arms got your hands
Got your fingers got your legs
Got your feet got your toes
Got your liver got your blood
Got your guts, got your muscle
But you need life, life, life, life, life,
Liiiii-hiiiiiiife!"
They finished gasping and panting for breath with a huge round of practically maniacal applause. They stood up, both their faces the color of Ron's hair, and went to Hermione, apologizing the whole way.
"Really, Hermione, we have no clue where that came from," Harry panted.
"Yeah," Ron continued between breaths. "We don't...know where...that...came from."
She harrumphed, her eyes narrowed, but linked arms with them just the same. "Come on," she grumbled and steered them in a different direction.
Ron, noticing first, asked, "Where are we going?"
Hermione, after giving him a 'be quiet' glare, said to him, "To Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. I know now that that little episode in Snape's room wasn't just a fluke. Something's going on and I intend to figure out what. After your little performance, I'm sure that there's bound to be someone else terribly embarrassed before too long. Now, come on." She pulled them along faster down the hall and away from curious and prying eyes.
~`~`~`~`~
Inside of Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, they were huddled around one of the sinks talking. Luckily for them, Myrtle happened to be absent at the time, no doubt sulking down somewhere in the nether regions of the school's plumbing system.
"We have to figure this out," Hermione said as she sat down harshly on the floor. "There simply must be some sort of answer. I don't think that I could take another one of your songs about my anatomy anytime soon." Both Ron and Harry turned a bright crimson. "Besides, I have no desire to start singing either."
Harry smirked. "Why? Don't want to do a song about our anatomy?" She glared and threw her book bag at him, hitting him square in the face. "Bloody hell, Hermione! It was just a joke! Do you have to be so violent?"
She laughed roughly. "Just goes to show you that I can take care of myself. And anyone else who comes along." Music filled the bathroom and Hermione groaned inwardly, knowing that her worst fear was about to happen.
"There are worse things I could do," she sang
"Then hit a boy
Or two.
Even though the whole school thinks I'm brainy
And so good
I suppose it could be true
But there are worse things I could do."
She glanced despairingly at her two laughing friends. She knew that her musical silence could only last so long.
"I could hurt all of you guys
Smack all you and chop you down to size
Make it seem like just a dance
Make you think you stand a chance
Then go and bruise them black and blue
That's a thing I'd never do."
Glaring once again, she continued with her silly and altogether out of place ditty that had absolutely no value whatsoever.
"I could go out every night
Take a chance with all the guys
Make out with them every day
And throw my life away
Over dreams that didn't come true
I could hurt someone like me
Out of spite or jealousy
I don't steal and I don't lie
But I can feel and I can cry
A fact I'll bet you never knew
But to cry in front of you
That's the worse thing I could do."
The music slowly went away and she looked down at the floor, totally and utterly embarrassed.
"Well, that was totally pointless," she heard Ron say. She looked up.
"What do you mean?" Her injured pride was getting the best of her.
He turned to look at her. "What I mean is what did that accomplish? It didn't even make sense half the time. At least our song sort of fit in to what we had been saying. Yours just sort of popped up without so much as an explanation. Although, I must say it, you do sing better than Harry and I do, but," he grinned impishly, "none of us compare to Snape."
They laughed all together and remembered his horrified look as he sang about his beloved potions. Before long, though, their laughter annoyed a certain whiny ghost and she flew in their direction, screeching and moaning.
"What do you think you're doing here? Laughing at me, no doubt. Just because I'm a ghost. An ugly, miserable, and silly little ghost!" She looked at them all slowly. "Ooh, I can't stand any of you!"
Ron calmed down. "We weren't laughing at you Myrtle. We're laughing about Snape."
She didn't buy it. "Snape? Snape?! You expect me to believe that you're laughing about Snape?!" She shot into his face. "I don't believe you. Oh!" Angry and low music filled the room and the three students faces fell, for they knew what was coming.
"Just you wait, Ronald Weasley
Just you wait.
You'll be sorry but your tears'll be too late.
You'll be dead and I'll be sunny
Will I help you?
Don't be funny
Just you wait, Ronald Weasley
Just you wait
She stomped (at least, she stomped as well as a ghost can) around the other three, stopping to glare at Hermione
Just you wait, 'Mione Granger
Till you're sick
And you screams to fix your doctor
Double quick
I'll leave you to face your fate or
Get eaten by an alligator
Ho-ho, 'Mione Granger
Just you wait
Now, she stood in front of Harry, glaring until her eyes were nearly bulging out of her transparent head.
Oooh, Harry Potter
Just you wait until you're swimming in the lake
Oooh, Harry Potter
And you go under and begin to suffocate
When you yell you're gonna drown
I'll be happy as a clown
Oh-ho-ho, Harry Potter
Oh-ho-ho, Harry Potter
Just you wait!
The music slowed and prettied up a bit as she began to dance around in circles across the bathroom.
One day I'll be famous
I'll be proper and prim
Never see you so often
What a nice way to live
One evening Dumbledore
Says 'oh, Myrtle, old thing
I want all of Hogwarts
Your praises to sing
Next year on the 20th of May
I proclaim Moaning Myrtle day!
All the students will celebrate the glory of you
And whatever you wish and want I gladly will do'
Thanks a lot, man, says I in a manner well bred.
But all I want are Ron, Hermione, and Harry's
Head
She marched around with a sickeningly triumphant look on her face.
"Done, he will say with a stroke
Guards come and bring in the blokes!
Then they'll march all of you right to the wall
And Dumbledore'll say "Myrtle sound the call!"
As they raise their wands up higher
I'll shout "Ready! Aim! Fire!"
Oh-ho-ho, all you three!
Down you'll go, all you three!
Just you wait!"
The music disappeared and left Myrtle staring at them totally bemused. Her mouth flopped about like a fish out of water as she turned from one to the other, obviously searching for an explanation.
"Wha--What was that?" she stuttered.
Hermione smirked at her expression. "That's what made us laugh at Snape. He started singing in the middle of class. In fact, I have a suspicion that the entire school's been singing all day. The three of us, too." She grimaced. "I don't much care for singing, really."
Harry laughed at her. "And you think that the rest of school does? I only hope that the rest of the teachers are as amusing as Snape is."
Hermione smacked her hand to her forehead. "Oh, my goodness! We're late! Transfiguration starts in less than five minutes! Come on, you guys!" She grabbed her book bag from the ground, swung it over her shoulder, snatched both of her friend's wrists, and ran out of the bathroom with a hasty farewell to Myrtle as the door closed behind them.
~`~`~`~`~
Another chapter. Not very good, I know, but it's fun to write, so flame all you want, I'll just continue to post it. The songs this time are "I've Got Life" from Hair, "There Are Worse Things I Could Do" from Grease, and "Just You Wait" from My Fair Lady. Well, review and tell me what you think!
Disclaimer: all to J.K. Rowling
~`~`~`~`~ Chapter 2 ~`~`~`~`~
As the class made their way to the Great Hall, Hermione couldn't help but wonder what had happened inside of Snape's classroom. Had it been some sort of curse, or a potion gone awry, or was everybody just seeing too many musicals?
She looked to Harry, who, by the expression on his face, was just as confused as she was. "What happened in there?" she asked him without really expecting an answer.
He shrugged. "I dunno, but it seemed perfectly natural, didn't it? Like we just had to sing and the words just sort of popped into your head. I knew what Snape was going to say before he said it. It was weird."
Ron, interrupting of course, said, "But it was pretty funny though, right? I mean, did you see the look on Snape's face? He looked about ready to die. I don't think I've ever seen him like that before." He and Harry laughed. "I'd bet all my money that if he ever has to sing again, he'll kill himself."
With a withering glance at her friends, she began to sort through her book bag as they walked. With a cry of triumph, she pulled out her timetable. "Ah, here it is! All right, we just got out of Potions, so next we have...Transfiguration. Oh that's good. I do love a good transfiguration."
Ron rolled his eyes. "You, Hermione, love anything that somehow relates to school. Don't you know how to have fun?"
She glared at him from over her timetable. "Of course I do, Ron. What else could you call all that time in the library?"
Ron and Harry laughed just as a swell of music engulfed them. Ron began to sing.
"You need a life, mother,
You need laughs, sister,
We've got freedom, brother,
She needs good times, man,"
He turned to Harry with a dumbfounded look as Harry took over the song.
You need crazy ways, daughter,
You need million dollar charm, cousin,
You've got headaches, and toothaches
And we're getting bad times too
From you."
Now, in perfect unison:
"You've got your hair
You've got your head
You got your brains
You got your ears
You got your eyes
You got your nose
You got your mouth
You got your teeth
You've got your tongue
You've got your chin
You've got your neck
You've got your tits
You got your heart
You got your soul
You got your back
You've got your ass!"
Hermione stared at them in shock as passing people laughed at the two singing Gryffindors. They looked completely embarrassed by what they were saying, but could do nothing to stop it, no matter what they tried. The song just kept coming.
"You've got your arms
You've got your hands
Got your fingers got your legs
Got your feet got your toes
Got your liver
Got your blood.
But you need life, mother
You need laughs sister
We've got freedom brother
And you need good times, good times, man
You need crazy ways, daughter
You need million dollar charm, cousin
You've got headaches and toothaches
And we've got bad times too
From you.
Aaaah!"
They began to dance wildly around the corridor as students cheered them on and laughed at Hermione's horrified expression.
"Got your hair, got your head
Got your brains, got your ears
Got your eyes got your nose
Got your mouth
You got your teeth.
Got your tongue got your chin
Got your neck got your tits
Got your heart got your soul your back
You got your ass!
You've got your arms got your hands
Got your fingers got your legs
Got your feet got your toes
Got your liver got your blood
Got your guts, got your muscle
But you need life, life, life, life, life,
Liiiii-hiiiiiiife!"
They finished gasping and panting for breath with a huge round of practically maniacal applause. They stood up, both their faces the color of Ron's hair, and went to Hermione, apologizing the whole way.
"Really, Hermione, we have no clue where that came from," Harry panted.
"Yeah," Ron continued between breaths. "We don't...know where...that...came from."
She harrumphed, her eyes narrowed, but linked arms with them just the same. "Come on," she grumbled and steered them in a different direction.
Ron, noticing first, asked, "Where are we going?"
Hermione, after giving him a 'be quiet' glare, said to him, "To Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. I know now that that little episode in Snape's room wasn't just a fluke. Something's going on and I intend to figure out what. After your little performance, I'm sure that there's bound to be someone else terribly embarrassed before too long. Now, come on." She pulled them along faster down the hall and away from curious and prying eyes.
~`~`~`~`~
Inside of Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, they were huddled around one of the sinks talking. Luckily for them, Myrtle happened to be absent at the time, no doubt sulking down somewhere in the nether regions of the school's plumbing system.
"We have to figure this out," Hermione said as she sat down harshly on the floor. "There simply must be some sort of answer. I don't think that I could take another one of your songs about my anatomy anytime soon." Both Ron and Harry turned a bright crimson. "Besides, I have no desire to start singing either."
Harry smirked. "Why? Don't want to do a song about our anatomy?" She glared and threw her book bag at him, hitting him square in the face. "Bloody hell, Hermione! It was just a joke! Do you have to be so violent?"
She laughed roughly. "Just goes to show you that I can take care of myself. And anyone else who comes along." Music filled the bathroom and Hermione groaned inwardly, knowing that her worst fear was about to happen.
"There are worse things I could do," she sang
"Then hit a boy
Or two.
Even though the whole school thinks I'm brainy
And so good
I suppose it could be true
But there are worse things I could do."
She glanced despairingly at her two laughing friends. She knew that her musical silence could only last so long.
"I could hurt all of you guys
Smack all you and chop you down to size
Make it seem like just a dance
Make you think you stand a chance
Then go and bruise them black and blue
That's a thing I'd never do."
Glaring once again, she continued with her silly and altogether out of place ditty that had absolutely no value whatsoever.
"I could go out every night
Take a chance with all the guys
Make out with them every day
And throw my life away
Over dreams that didn't come true
I could hurt someone like me
Out of spite or jealousy
I don't steal and I don't lie
But I can feel and I can cry
A fact I'll bet you never knew
But to cry in front of you
That's the worse thing I could do."
The music slowly went away and she looked down at the floor, totally and utterly embarrassed.
"Well, that was totally pointless," she heard Ron say. She looked up.
"What do you mean?" Her injured pride was getting the best of her.
He turned to look at her. "What I mean is what did that accomplish? It didn't even make sense half the time. At least our song sort of fit in to what we had been saying. Yours just sort of popped up without so much as an explanation. Although, I must say it, you do sing better than Harry and I do, but," he grinned impishly, "none of us compare to Snape."
They laughed all together and remembered his horrified look as he sang about his beloved potions. Before long, though, their laughter annoyed a certain whiny ghost and she flew in their direction, screeching and moaning.
"What do you think you're doing here? Laughing at me, no doubt. Just because I'm a ghost. An ugly, miserable, and silly little ghost!" She looked at them all slowly. "Ooh, I can't stand any of you!"
Ron calmed down. "We weren't laughing at you Myrtle. We're laughing about Snape."
She didn't buy it. "Snape? Snape?! You expect me to believe that you're laughing about Snape?!" She shot into his face. "I don't believe you. Oh!" Angry and low music filled the room and the three students faces fell, for they knew what was coming.
"Just you wait, Ronald Weasley
Just you wait.
You'll be sorry but your tears'll be too late.
You'll be dead and I'll be sunny
Will I help you?
Don't be funny
Just you wait, Ronald Weasley
Just you wait
She stomped (at least, she stomped as well as a ghost can) around the other three, stopping to glare at Hermione
Just you wait, 'Mione Granger
Till you're sick
And you screams to fix your doctor
Double quick
I'll leave you to face your fate or
Get eaten by an alligator
Ho-ho, 'Mione Granger
Just you wait
Now, she stood in front of Harry, glaring until her eyes were nearly bulging out of her transparent head.
Oooh, Harry Potter
Just you wait until you're swimming in the lake
Oooh, Harry Potter
And you go under and begin to suffocate
When you yell you're gonna drown
I'll be happy as a clown
Oh-ho-ho, Harry Potter
Oh-ho-ho, Harry Potter
Just you wait!
The music slowed and prettied up a bit as she began to dance around in circles across the bathroom.
One day I'll be famous
I'll be proper and prim
Never see you so often
What a nice way to live
One evening Dumbledore
Says 'oh, Myrtle, old thing
I want all of Hogwarts
Your praises to sing
Next year on the 20th of May
I proclaim Moaning Myrtle day!
All the students will celebrate the glory of you
And whatever you wish and want I gladly will do'
Thanks a lot, man, says I in a manner well bred.
But all I want are Ron, Hermione, and Harry's
Head
She marched around with a sickeningly triumphant look on her face.
"Done, he will say with a stroke
Guards come and bring in the blokes!
Then they'll march all of you right to the wall
And Dumbledore'll say "Myrtle sound the call!"
As they raise their wands up higher
I'll shout "Ready! Aim! Fire!"
Oh-ho-ho, all you three!
Down you'll go, all you three!
Just you wait!"
The music disappeared and left Myrtle staring at them totally bemused. Her mouth flopped about like a fish out of water as she turned from one to the other, obviously searching for an explanation.
"Wha--What was that?" she stuttered.
Hermione smirked at her expression. "That's what made us laugh at Snape. He started singing in the middle of class. In fact, I have a suspicion that the entire school's been singing all day. The three of us, too." She grimaced. "I don't much care for singing, really."
Harry laughed at her. "And you think that the rest of school does? I only hope that the rest of the teachers are as amusing as Snape is."
Hermione smacked her hand to her forehead. "Oh, my goodness! We're late! Transfiguration starts in less than five minutes! Come on, you guys!" She grabbed her book bag from the ground, swung it over her shoulder, snatched both of her friend's wrists, and ran out of the bathroom with a hasty farewell to Myrtle as the door closed behind them.
~`~`~`~`~
Another chapter. Not very good, I know, but it's fun to write, so flame all you want, I'll just continue to post it. The songs this time are "I've Got Life" from Hair, "There Are Worse Things I Could Do" from Grease, and "Just You Wait" from My Fair Lady. Well, review and tell me what you think!