Britz-Now I got to tell you something about this chap, just when you think shit couldn't get more confusing this chapter is no longer in sequential order, think of it as Pulp Fiction but harder to swallow, it's obvious but I figured since if you've enjoyed this fic enough to read so far you've obviously got some kind of mental defect so I better spoon feed you this shit, so sue me, I got sick of sensical timelines, wanted something different and it all comes together in the end, I promise.
Disclaimer- I'm warning you now, this chapter has some right sick, evil, demented shit in it, I know it, you'll know it so there ain't much point complaining if you're the one who's gonna be reading it.
~Chapter Fifth teen~
Jake and Cassie gently nudged open the doors of the gardening department, it looked like a small forest inside dappled ferns hanging over the path, potted trees lining the walk and somewhere the gentle sound of lapping water, in the light of day it would've been an effective selling tool, on a zombie infested All Hallows Eve however it was just plain..
"Creepy." Cassie remarked, Jake nodded in agreement.
They tiptoed through the plants, "Jesus what's that smell?" Jake asked.
Cassie spied a looming pile. "Paydirt."
"Huh?"
"Paydirt, it's the name of this fertilizer brand, we also got 'Food of the Triffids' and 'I Can't Believe It's Not Bullshit'."
Then a snarl ripped through the air and a stumbling member of the undead rounded the bags of fertilizer and came at them. Jake and Cassie screamed to shatter glass and grabbed for each other.
"Hahaha!" It laughed, "And the other zombies laughed when I told them I'd spend my night waiting for victims in the S-mart nursery section behind bags of fertilizer, but I knew you'd come, oh yes I did! Me! Hahahahaha!" Then shots rang through the air, ripping apart the zombie's torso. "Aww raspberries."
It whirled around to face Ash, standing defiantly with his smoking boomstick "Sorry buddy, I think you're looking for beauty products, Isle 12." He swung the gun around old West style and sheathed it.
"Now that's just mean, I can't help this grey/green complexion, goes with the undead thing."
"Doesn't mean you can't look your best." With a liquid movement Ash grabbed a shovel from a rack beside the path, ran at the zombie and swiped the edge at it's neck. The rather surprised looking head flew off into some spider web ferns, the body collapsed. "There, much better." Ash looked at the shovel and then down at the body, "Well this brings back some unhappy memories."
"Ahh, sorry 'bout that, we'll get to loading up these wagons with fertilizer then?" Jake asked, pointing at some nursery shopping carts.
"You do that. I'm gonna be on the other side of the store, so if you're gonna scream, scream loud." Ash took one more look at the shovel then hurled it away and walked off.
The shovel spun through the air, turning, turning with a lazy 'whoop... whoop...' noise as it gained height then it reached the top of it's arc and spiralled down, the spade part, coated with zombie blood plummeting, looking like a plunging arrow then it drove itself into the heart... of a potted shrubbery.
"Alright lets start loading up the carts." Jake said. "Which has got the highest chemical to poop ratio?"
The shovel stood still and defiant, buried deep in the root system of the shrubbery, wet zombie blood trickled down into the dirt... wet, infected, zombie blood... infected.... With that weird mutagen of unpredictable and hilarious consequence...
"I Can't Believe It's Not Bullshit has Triptophaine14 and high traces of Zygoten8, that sound explosive to you?" Cassie replied.
Jake shrugged and picked up a bag "Aww, this crap's heavy.. And squishy." He dumped the bag into the cart suddenly there was a soft cracking noise from the other side, like a pot being forced apart from the inside. "Wha.. What was that? Another zombie?"
There was a slithering noise from that direction, something rushing across concrete floor, more cracking, more slithering, Jake and Cassie backed up till their butts made gentle contact with the giant pile of bags of crap. "I got a sneaking suspicion." Cassie remarked "That this is gonna be worse."
Vines blew out of the wall of ferns and whipped around the pair. trees blew apart in showers of leaves, branches twisting into more vines that whipped about like snakes in the air. bulging above the others came a mass of branches and leaves that seem to curve almost into a vague face shape, like an ill-considered decorative hedge.
"It's.. A shrubbery!" Jake cried, dramatic music rose and fell in the air, paying tribute to a movie that has nothing to do with this genre!
The giant shrubbery face looked down on them, seemingly focusing with only empty, leafy sockets on the slim, toned, attractive-if-you're-into-that-tomboy-look form of Cassie still clad in her stark white angel robe, it seemed to pause and lick it giant shrubbery lips with a huge leaf tongue.
"Gimme some sugar baby." Vines whipped around her waist and tangled up her arms and legs before pulling her screaming into the air.
"Hey buddy! Hands off my girl!" Jake protested.
"Take a hike squeak." The shrubbery told him, a branch the size of a sapling whipped out from it's strange leafy mass and struck Jake, sending him flying over the nursery, he crunched too a landing.
"YEE-Ow-OWW!" He screamed "Help! I landed on some cactuses! Wait that don't sound right, Cactussi? No wait, I think it's Cacti. . . And a rake!"
Cassie looked like Fay Wray in the grasp of King Kong, had he been an enormous Chia pet. "Oh God, please don't eat me! I have fertilizer! Tasty fertilizer!"
"Oh yeah honey." Boomed the giant shrubbery sarcastically "I was born a self pollinating species of plant, and the first woman I see when I become a giant monster plant I'm gonna eat."
"Well what are you looking to.. Oh." Cassie stopped, "Ooh noo, I'm not that kind of girl!"
"Aww Come on, I always took you for a tree hugger."
"Yes, friendly hugs that's as far as it went I swear!"
The giant shrubbery smiled condescendingly and slipped a vine inside her top.
"No.. No, wait.. softer, little too the left."
The enormous plant bristled "Damnit woman! Let me get my rhythm on!"
Cassie rolled her eyes "Well 'sorry' didn't know you were so 'sensitive'."
"Stop talking! You're putting off my game!"
As if working in time-lapse photography skinny branches seemed to grow up and entwine in Cassie dress, then when it was completely snagged they pulled apart, ripping the dress to shreds of white material and leaving Cassie in her matching good girl white bra and panties.
The beast slipped the vine out from underneath her bra and slid around her back "Aww man, so many hooks.." Another couple of vines joined the fray "Bloody hell. Why couldn't I have mutated me some thumbs..?" Finally the bra came off and fluttered to the ground.
Jake came up rubbing his various cuts "Hey, when did you get that piercing?" Another massive branch swatted him away like an irksome bug "OW-HAOW! I think I landed on a pitchfork this time!"
Two vines entwined up Cassie's long smooth legs, slipping under her underwear and pulling it apart. Eyes wide Cassie shook her head mutely "... Oh no... No..."
"Aww yeah." grinned the giant Shrubbery a vine snapped out of it's mass and headed straight for her like a guided missile, Cassie's whole body seemed to tighten with it's thrust. Gently the vines laid her back to the concrete and began pumping away.
"Oh yeah, how do you like my mighty oak huh? How do you like my weed-whacker huh bay-bee huh? Bet you're pretty happy with all that plant gro they feed me now huh?"
"Oh not happening, not happening." Cassie eyes stared off into space "No no n.. N.. N.. Yes! Yes that's the spot! Oh God yes!"
VRROOM!! Roared a diesel engine from by the door, Ash stood defiant, clouds of blue smoke rising from his chainsaw "Alright beastie, it's harvest time!"
"Fucking cockblock!" Raged the leafy monstrosity, vines flew through the air, Ash twirled away from them, bringing around his chainsaw and ripping through the fighting foliage, twisted vines fell to the ground and flopped about helplessly, a huge hand shaped branch came at him and he brought his Excalibur up, bits of twig and stick flew through the air and the creature roared in surprise and pain.
Cassie meanwhile used the distraction to unwind herself from the limpening vines holding her down, then looked fearfully down between her legs, pity he was a giant psychotic rapist shrubbery, they could have really had some thing there, she gripped it and the plant's attention was suddenly back to her "Hey, I ain't done with you yet! Damn woman, you have your fun and leave me hanging.." The vine twisted itself tightly around her ankles and he turned back to Ash who was tearing through the plants weird garden body.
Through a flourish of leaves and blue smoke he stood above her "Sorry, I interrupt something between the two of you?"
"Well my big O isn't going to turn up now so you might as well help me."
"Your call baby." And Ash brought the chainsaw up and blazed through the vine binding, the shrubbery roared loud enough to rattle the windows.
"Oh you sick bastard! You son of a bitch Lorena Bobbit wannabe you cut off my pollinating gland!!"
"I didn't know you were Jewish." Cassie remarked, Ash snatched her up before dozens of branches and vines whacked down and ripped at where they had been moments before. The rolled into a huge display case of pesticides and various chemical, cans and sprays fell to the ground Ash pounced on them.
"Come on.. Come on.." He murmured sorting through them finally he picked one up aerosol can 'Roundup' "Yes!" Ash remarked as he spotted the tiny flammable signal, he pulled off the cap and spray it then whipped out his Zippo lighter and lit the fumes, the tiny flame blazed about and sucked itself down the little spray hole. Ash stood up holding the smouldering can.
"Hey Shiteater, your ass is grass."
"Yes and my appendix is that rose bush what's your.. Oh God no!" The shrubbery yelled as Ash hurled the smoking Roundup into it's leafy maw, it exploded with a flash of orange and the plant creature immediately started blazing.
"Ahh! All I wanted was a booty call!" Yelled the burning bush, "Oh what a world what a world!" it crashed to the ground, sending smouldering ash and flaming leaves spiralling towards the ceiling.
Ash coughed at the smoke and ran a hand through his hair "Kills, weeds, dead."
"Uh, thanks Ash." Cassie said, sitting up and rubbing her head.
"Yeah! You're a saint!" Jake yelled from somewhere in the nursery, voice cracking slightly.
"Jake are you okay?" Ash called.
"Oh, ow, yeah fine."
"Good, keep loading up the fertilizer."
"Can do Mr Williams sir."
Ash turned to Cassie, blatantly catching an eyeful, "Whats say we get you to Woman's Wear?"
"Yeah." she shakily got to her feet, "Little help?" Ash put his arm around her bare shoulder and they waddled out, Cassie decidedly bow-legged.
"You gonna be okay there?"
"Physically, though I pity the man who has to follow that act."
Minutes later Cassie picked out a set of clothes in her size off the rack and dressed in the isle, she noticed Ash watching her carefully, "You mind? Little privacy?"
"Babe I don't think you got anything new for me to see, but sorry, I'm just thinking about the transference of genetic material."
"That's a romantic way of putting it."
"No, you see, back when my life was first going to Hell one of the girls I was with wandered into the forest, came back a zombie, it didn't show at first though, I'm just wondering.." A yell interrupted, Rachel's voice calling his name, Ash stopped in mid-sentence, a demonic squawk cut the air "Kee-RAWK!!" and he was off without another word.
Cassie half started after him but her knees still felt like jelly and collapsed to the ground instead, she groaned, it felt almost like something was squirming about inside her.
"Bastard pot plant, bet he won't even call now." She slumped unconscious.
~Chapter Sixteen~
They stood worried as gunshots cracked, Rachel half started, Tobias nearly took to the wing, but Ash finally blew out of the frosted glass doors.
"You okay?" Marco asked.
"Everything's fine, I just thought this place would be secure but maybe a couple of zombies slipped through other ways, you two go find the shit we need, Aisle Four, but for God's sake keep your eyes open."
"You got it boss-man." Ben said, He and Marco marched off, "Hard ass." one of them muttered.
Ash offered Rachel his arm "Shall we ma'am?"
Rachel laughed and took his arm, "Lead the way." They walked towards Sporting Goods, Tobias narrowed his eyes and flapped off to land on Rachel's shoulder between their heads.
[Gee this is cosy.] He announced and glared at Ash, Ash glared back, as they disappeared down the aisle both were so concentrated on the other that no one noticed the two female figures that approached the store doors.
The matching Jonson sisters still in their matching blue gingham, their fierce eyes observed the smashed glass where they had broken in, then looked at the other "They went in here." Lisa said.
"I concur." Kim replied, they concentrated on the locks again, achingly the bolt slid out it's rest and the doors swung open, letting in a draft that blew several leaves onto the glass sprinkled floor as two identical pairs of black shoes stepped inside, The Jonson sisters turned to their left, towards the nursery then in the same moment their heads snapped to the right where Marco and Ben had disappeared into the shelves.
"Thisaway." Kim said.
"Ditto." Lisa replied.
Matching black shoes clocking on the linoleum, matching gingham dress swishing around their undead but still perfect rears, identical blond pigtails trailing over their shoulders Lisa and Kim marched towards the trace signal of Marco's energy, nobody, but nobody stood up the Jonson sisters.
They got to Sporting Goods and Ash vaulted over the hunting counter, it was a glass cabinet filled with hunting knifes and box after box of ammunition, the wall behind was lined with hunting rifles and shotguns.
"Locked, this is gonna take some finesse." Ash said after inspecting the back of the cabinets, he hopped back up, looked down through the glass and ploughed his metal fist through the top, Tobias winced at the sound.
[Y'know you're bloody liable to set off alarms like that.]
Ash looked at him, "We don't have alarms, but then, I'd know something like that wouldn't I? Plus think the cops 'round these parts are gonna have more shit on their hands than they can handle tonight already, out fighting zombies or checking kids candy for razor blades, All Hallows Eve, magical night innit?" He began stuffing boxes of buckshot into his pockets with a certain childlike greed.
"Hmm, his eyes fell on a particularly large hunting knife, at least a foot long in all, he already had his chainsaw but it didn't hurt to spoil himself once in a while, he grabbed the knife and leather sheath and jammed it into his belt on his left hip, just above where his chainsaw hung in it's scabbard.
He looked up at the expectant Rachel and Tobias who had flapped on top of one of the shelves and glared at him possessively, "For the lady?"
"Huh?"
"Ma'am you look like a gal ready to go on out and bag yourself a serious trophy, I got just the thing." He turned around and after brief consideration plucked a particularly fine gun from the wall "Mossberg 500 Tactical" He said as he turned back, "It's a beautiful gun and no denying, perfect for a lady on the go such as yourself."
"Oh, I don't know if I should, I usually just morph."
"I saw you with that gun in your hands and I thought now there's a woman who can handle her boomstick."
"You really think so? It's never appealed to me before, I like the personal approach."
"Maybe you just haven't wrapped your hands around the right calibre just yet." Ash hoarsely whispered, Tobias still stared, hearing every word. Ash stepped back, "This baby comes with the 590 heatsheild and Ghost Ring sights, it's chambered for.410m, weighs a little over three kilos, here, hold her, see how you like the feel." He handed the gun to her.
Rachel nodded, "Feels good." she admitted, "I can see how you get along here."
"House wares is still my calling ma'am but it doesn't hurt to know a little bit about everything, she's a beaut I tell you a real beaut, carries seven in an under barrel magazine just there, I tell you if a gun was about to pry me away from the Remington it would be a Mossberg."
"You're a good salesmen but I'm just here to use the bathroom." She smiled.
"So don't make your decision now, I just want you to keep in mind." His face was very close to hers at this point "That there are, always, other options." She nodded mutely.
[Yeah say that's great Ash, gee look at the time, maybe you should check on the others.]
Ash turned from Rachel and smiled thinly at him, "Actually you probably should." Rachel said.
"Your wish is my command." With a hand resting on the butt of his chainsaw he walked around the counter and down the aisle, towards the nursery once more "You guys see anything you like just go on and spoil yourself, I'm getting a great employees discount tonight." He called before turning the corner.
As he wandered down the front of the store, his mind grinding slowly he walked past the open doors without a thought and towards the nursery, stopping in confusion before he reached the door, it sounded almost like someone was having sex in there, slowly, carefully he pushed the door open.
[Well do you find him attractive?]
Rachel was staring down the barrel of the Mossberg, she spun to him and he was staring straight down the guns bore, he fluttered a moment in disquiet, "What?"
[Ash. Do you find him attractive?] Tobias repeated.
"Well, I guess, sure some people might say he's attractive, you know, if you're into that whole rugged, manly, unshaven, brawny, alpha male look."
[Oh and you're not?] Tobias sneered.
Rachel put the gun to her side and looked at him seriously "I'm dating you aren't I?"
Tobias took a beat or two to think that one out. [... Oh, ha ha, very droll.]
"I thought so."
Silence drew out into the minutes as Rachel inspected the cabinet, poking at the boxes of ammo and admiring the various knifes while Tobias watched her and preened with a vengeance.
[You really believe his whole story?]
"What, the cabin and the living forest and that whole time travel bit?" Rachel asked.
[Yeah, seems a little suspect too me.] Tobias answered.
"Hey, we're living proof stranger things can and will happen."
[I still don't like it, sounds like the plot for some bad cult B-movie.]
"Uh-huh, uh-huh." Rachel said, concentrating far more on loading the Mossberg (just to see how it felt of course, she told herself, she wasn't so smitten with him to change her fighting ways, yet.)
[You're not listening too m..] suddenly something had dropped from the heavens and landed with a splat of Tobias' head [Gaa! What the hell is this?] He flapped about and squawked loudly in sudden panic, this at least caused the slimey question mark, it felt like the drool of some terrible beast to Tobias, to slid off and disappear into the shelves. He flew to the ground wildly, scanning the ceiling for whatever might have dropped but could see no Alien-esque beastie waiting for it's chance to drop and turn his ass into Kentucky fried.
Rachel dropped the gun and ran to him "Tobias? Are you okay? What happened?"
Tobias breathed, [Something, I don't know what, dropped on my head.] Rachel knelt down and examined him, his feathered head was streaked with red stripes.
"It looks, like, like blood or something, a big drop of blood?" She stammered.
[I guess, God I got the taste in my mouth now, blood, and something else, something familiar. . . Bleh.]
"Sure your okay?"
[I'm fine, I'm fi. .] Suddenly his little body racked with convulsions. [Aww shit, I ain't fine.] Black cracks seem to swarm up amongst his feathers for a moment the subsided, he collapsed, seemingly unconscious.
"Tobias?" Rachel prodded at his side gently then drew back quickly as his body seemed to be swelling all over "Are you morphing?" But it didn't look like morphing, he appeared to be blowing up like a balloon, she got up, stepped back, rolls of flesh seemed to rise and fall under his feathery skin, his body was becoming bloated. "T-Tobias?"
Finally he looked up at her and she gasped in shock, his neck now stood out repulsively and his face seemed to have devolved to a previous point in history with a streamlined somehow reptilian head shape, his eyes rolled back to complete yellow, his beak was longer, bigger and serrated into saw tooth edges.
He jumped onto his feet, claws just as fierce before but now even bigger and considered her, his wings had not grown with his bloated body and remained stunted little mockeries [Polly want... Your soul!!]
He leapt into the air his wings exploded outwards, feathers flying in all direction in a microsecond they had expanded to giant leathery bat wings, easily six foot from tip to tip, that would have looked more at home on a dinosaur from Earth's ancient past.
"Ash! ASH!!" Rachel yelled barely realising she was doing it.
"Kee-RAWK!!" Screeched the monstrosity as it took off, flapping those huge powerful wings effortlessly for lift it came swooping down, she dived just in time to avoid having her face taken off, Tobias continued on, smashing apart a stand of sunglasses as he went.
"Asssshh!!" Rachel screamed, morphing would be useless to her; she'd be defence less against this monster if she tried, she dropped and rolled, what could she do? Then she spotted it, sitting right in front of her was the Mossberg 500, right where she'd dropped it when she ran for Tobias, loaded and ready to go.
She grabbed and heaved herself up, chambering a shell, "Pull!" She fired off a shot, it smacked Tobias dead on, he flew through the air, blood and feathers fluttering about him he nearly fell from the air but kept steady.
Ash ran to the end of the aisle, for a moment unable to compute what he was seeing, around the roof rafter a swelled and mutated Tobias flapped about, Rachel pulled off three shots in quick succession, two connected dead on, one punching into his stomach the other ripping through the membrane of his wing but still he flew.
[Bombs away bitch!] It screeched and dive-bombed her, one claw knocked the gun out her grasp and it skittered over the floor, the other ripped a deep furrow in her left shoulder, she was forced to the ground by his beating leathery wings, Ash started for her and the mutant Tobias spotted him.
[You! Try and steal my girl will'ya?]
Ash stumbled back, "Ah sorry man, I was y'know, unclear on the guy rules if the girl's dating a bird."
[Human in bird's body! Damnit, y'know, I can be human sometimes.]
"See! See! I did not know that." Tobias let out a screech of anger and dived at him, Ash pulled out his Remington but it was knocked from his grasp when Tobias hit him full pelt in the chest.
Ash's world became one of scratching claws and beating wings, Tobias sunk his ferocious claws into his belly and pecked at his face with that serrated beak, Ash pushed his arm between his body and Tobias, his metal fingers were grasping for the hunting knife but he just couldn't reach, crushed under the weight of the bloated maddened mutant.
Rachel ignored the gushing pain in her shoulder and slowly she crept up behind Tobias, she found the Mossberg and waited till she was right behind him, staring down his puckered little bird rectum, she drew back the gun and shoved mightily.
Tobias pupil-less eyes bulged til they nearly fell right out of his ugly head, Rachel's finger tightened on the trigger "See how you like it stuck there honey!" She yelled, the explosion of the gun was deafening, feathers flew outwards in a cloud. When they cleared however Tobias still stayed in one piece, absolutely motionless perched on Ash's stomach, a look of utter shock on his pointed face, all his feathers were fluttering to the ground as he was now as bald as a plucked chicken.
Rachel drew back the Mossberg with an audible pop, Tobias didn't even flinch, after a moment or two however a small lump travelled up his scraggly throat, he hoarsely coughed a puff of smoke, his jaw remained dropped open as if unhinged, a pellet of buckshot dripped out of his beak and onto Ash's chest, followed by a second, then a third that rolled off Ash's side to the ground.
[. . .Ouch. . .]
Tobias's eyes glazed over and a little rivulet of blood began to run out of his beak, he rocked to the side and smacked the ground, about as threatening as a Thanksgiving dinner.
Ash climbed to his elbows and looked at Rachel, bleeding, beaten, clutching her Mossberg, "You okay?"
"Nothing a quick morph won't fix, you?"
"I've shook off worse."
A long silent minute ticked out.
"Is it wrong to be turned on right now?"
"Little bit, yeah."
"Yeah, I thought as much."
~Chapter Seventeen~
"So what are we looking for anyhow?" Marco asked Ben as they wandered down the aisle.
"Well ya see the chemical fertilizer is great fuel for bomb making but it still needs a smaller explosion to trigger it into exploding, we're looking for the trigger." Ben said, he stopped, grabbed a can off the shelf and pointed to the flammable symbol. "This'll do, well that's enough work, smoko break."
He sat down and leaned against the shelf, Marco squatted beside him, Ben rummaged through his pockets and finally found what he was looking for, a prerolled fatty and a little book of matches, he seemed to think for a moment then handed them to Marco, "Here, you wanna do the honours?"
Marco took the stuff, shook his head and instead stuck them in his jacket pocket, "Nah man, listen are you sure that this is the stuff we need cause maybe we should check."
"You don't trust my judgement?"
"Ben, you're a fried out stoner asshole."
"Yeah that's true."
Marco sighed and sat down next to him, leaned back and was considering taking the joint back out his pocket, when a ringing voice in stereo sounded from the end of the aisle.
"Marco." He jerked up and looked in the direction of the voices, the Jonson sisters were standing their, holding hands and still dressed in their gingham but now looking as if they were lit up with some demonic light at their backs.
"Marco. Come play with us Marco."
Marco and Ben slowly rose to their feet and stared, mouths gaping.
Within a blink it seemed the girls teleported to bridge half the distance between them, they looked from one to the other simultaneously, "Marco.. Ben.. Come play with us, come play with us Marco and Ben."
"Uhh, okay, what's your game, Chess? Monopoly?" Marco asked.
The girls giggled but it was no longer a sweet innocent sound, it was a demonic tinkling, evil and yet somehow more seductive, both put their right index fingers to their pouting lips and sucked gently on the tips, "Come play with us, come play with us, forever, and ever, and ever, and ever.."
"Hey if you got the money I got the time girls." Interrupted Ben, still wide and starry eyed.
The girls were smiling matching predatory grins at this point and Marco couldn't help but notice how long and wolf like their canines were, all almost two inches long, they looked at one another with evil glee then back to the boys, another split second and they had bridged the rest of the distance and were standing right in front of them, both grabbed the front of the boys' shirts and pulled them closer.
"I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul!" Growled Lisa, holding Marco.
Kim shrugged, "I'll spit." She admitted and both pulled them to the floor.
"Gah! OH! OW!! Oh man that's good!!"
Sweating, heaving minutes later the four lay entangled on the linoleum floor.
"That was.. Different.." Panted Lisa.
"Yeah, that 360 head spin thing, you do that with all the guys?" Marco asked.
"No I was just caught in the moment." She replied
"Dude." Ben held up his hand, Marco grinned and high fived him.
"OhmyGod, you guys are pigs!" Kim said "I can't believe I gave you my flower!"
Lisa looked over "OhmyGod, will you please stop calling it that? You are such a goody goody."
"And you are such a bitch, get out of my face."
"Please." Lisa turned to Marco "Call me." And the girls disappear in two flashes of light.
"Ouch, they couldn't have just walked off?" Marco asked, "That singed hair in delicate places."
"Yeah but it beats pillow talk I spose." Ben said, he grabbed at his crotch and pealed off his rubber "Good thing I wear one of these at all times."
Marco looked Ben up and down, Ben did the same to Marco.
"No eye contact for three weeks." Marco said finally.
"Agreed."
Marco eyed the condom, "Oh Christ, will you get rid of that thing? It's dripping hymn blood."
Ben looked at it, a drop of blood dripped off, fell to the floor and began to sizzle and eat away at the white linoleum, "Ahh yeah sure." He tied a knot in the top and flung it over the shelves.
"There, now.." He stopped, from the direction Ben had thrown too there was the sound of panicked squawking.
[Gaa! What the hell is this?] They heard Tobias' yell.
Marco shook his head, "They ask, we don't know nothing, lets get dressed."
***To Be Continued***
Britz-Christ, you gotta write me a review just to let me know who got through that monster, bloody hell that was rough, think I'll go lie down for a while, scuse me.
Disclaimer- I'm warning you now, this chapter has some right sick, evil, demented shit in it, I know it, you'll know it so there ain't much point complaining if you're the one who's gonna be reading it.
~Chapter Fifth teen~
Jake and Cassie gently nudged open the doors of the gardening department, it looked like a small forest inside dappled ferns hanging over the path, potted trees lining the walk and somewhere the gentle sound of lapping water, in the light of day it would've been an effective selling tool, on a zombie infested All Hallows Eve however it was just plain..
"Creepy." Cassie remarked, Jake nodded in agreement.
They tiptoed through the plants, "Jesus what's that smell?" Jake asked.
Cassie spied a looming pile. "Paydirt."
"Huh?"
"Paydirt, it's the name of this fertilizer brand, we also got 'Food of the Triffids' and 'I Can't Believe It's Not Bullshit'."
Then a snarl ripped through the air and a stumbling member of the undead rounded the bags of fertilizer and came at them. Jake and Cassie screamed to shatter glass and grabbed for each other.
"Hahaha!" It laughed, "And the other zombies laughed when I told them I'd spend my night waiting for victims in the S-mart nursery section behind bags of fertilizer, but I knew you'd come, oh yes I did! Me! Hahahahaha!" Then shots rang through the air, ripping apart the zombie's torso. "Aww raspberries."
It whirled around to face Ash, standing defiantly with his smoking boomstick "Sorry buddy, I think you're looking for beauty products, Isle 12." He swung the gun around old West style and sheathed it.
"Now that's just mean, I can't help this grey/green complexion, goes with the undead thing."
"Doesn't mean you can't look your best." With a liquid movement Ash grabbed a shovel from a rack beside the path, ran at the zombie and swiped the edge at it's neck. The rather surprised looking head flew off into some spider web ferns, the body collapsed. "There, much better." Ash looked at the shovel and then down at the body, "Well this brings back some unhappy memories."
"Ahh, sorry 'bout that, we'll get to loading up these wagons with fertilizer then?" Jake asked, pointing at some nursery shopping carts.
"You do that. I'm gonna be on the other side of the store, so if you're gonna scream, scream loud." Ash took one more look at the shovel then hurled it away and walked off.
The shovel spun through the air, turning, turning with a lazy 'whoop... whoop...' noise as it gained height then it reached the top of it's arc and spiralled down, the spade part, coated with zombie blood plummeting, looking like a plunging arrow then it drove itself into the heart... of a potted shrubbery.
"Alright lets start loading up the carts." Jake said. "Which has got the highest chemical to poop ratio?"
The shovel stood still and defiant, buried deep in the root system of the shrubbery, wet zombie blood trickled down into the dirt... wet, infected, zombie blood... infected.... With that weird mutagen of unpredictable and hilarious consequence...
"I Can't Believe It's Not Bullshit has Triptophaine14 and high traces of Zygoten8, that sound explosive to you?" Cassie replied.
Jake shrugged and picked up a bag "Aww, this crap's heavy.. And squishy." He dumped the bag into the cart suddenly there was a soft cracking noise from the other side, like a pot being forced apart from the inside. "Wha.. What was that? Another zombie?"
There was a slithering noise from that direction, something rushing across concrete floor, more cracking, more slithering, Jake and Cassie backed up till their butts made gentle contact with the giant pile of bags of crap. "I got a sneaking suspicion." Cassie remarked "That this is gonna be worse."
Vines blew out of the wall of ferns and whipped around the pair. trees blew apart in showers of leaves, branches twisting into more vines that whipped about like snakes in the air. bulging above the others came a mass of branches and leaves that seem to curve almost into a vague face shape, like an ill-considered decorative hedge.
"It's.. A shrubbery!" Jake cried, dramatic music rose and fell in the air, paying tribute to a movie that has nothing to do with this genre!
The giant shrubbery face looked down on them, seemingly focusing with only empty, leafy sockets on the slim, toned, attractive-if-you're-into-that-tomboy-look form of Cassie still clad in her stark white angel robe, it seemed to pause and lick it giant shrubbery lips with a huge leaf tongue.
"Gimme some sugar baby." Vines whipped around her waist and tangled up her arms and legs before pulling her screaming into the air.
"Hey buddy! Hands off my girl!" Jake protested.
"Take a hike squeak." The shrubbery told him, a branch the size of a sapling whipped out from it's strange leafy mass and struck Jake, sending him flying over the nursery, he crunched too a landing.
"YEE-Ow-OWW!" He screamed "Help! I landed on some cactuses! Wait that don't sound right, Cactussi? No wait, I think it's Cacti. . . And a rake!"
Cassie looked like Fay Wray in the grasp of King Kong, had he been an enormous Chia pet. "Oh God, please don't eat me! I have fertilizer! Tasty fertilizer!"
"Oh yeah honey." Boomed the giant shrubbery sarcastically "I was born a self pollinating species of plant, and the first woman I see when I become a giant monster plant I'm gonna eat."
"Well what are you looking to.. Oh." Cassie stopped, "Ooh noo, I'm not that kind of girl!"
"Aww Come on, I always took you for a tree hugger."
"Yes, friendly hugs that's as far as it went I swear!"
The giant shrubbery smiled condescendingly and slipped a vine inside her top.
"No.. No, wait.. softer, little too the left."
The enormous plant bristled "Damnit woman! Let me get my rhythm on!"
Cassie rolled her eyes "Well 'sorry' didn't know you were so 'sensitive'."
"Stop talking! You're putting off my game!"
As if working in time-lapse photography skinny branches seemed to grow up and entwine in Cassie dress, then when it was completely snagged they pulled apart, ripping the dress to shreds of white material and leaving Cassie in her matching good girl white bra and panties.
The beast slipped the vine out from underneath her bra and slid around her back "Aww man, so many hooks.." Another couple of vines joined the fray "Bloody hell. Why couldn't I have mutated me some thumbs..?" Finally the bra came off and fluttered to the ground.
Jake came up rubbing his various cuts "Hey, when did you get that piercing?" Another massive branch swatted him away like an irksome bug "OW-HAOW! I think I landed on a pitchfork this time!"
Two vines entwined up Cassie's long smooth legs, slipping under her underwear and pulling it apart. Eyes wide Cassie shook her head mutely "... Oh no... No..."
"Aww yeah." grinned the giant Shrubbery a vine snapped out of it's mass and headed straight for her like a guided missile, Cassie's whole body seemed to tighten with it's thrust. Gently the vines laid her back to the concrete and began pumping away.
"Oh yeah, how do you like my mighty oak huh? How do you like my weed-whacker huh bay-bee huh? Bet you're pretty happy with all that plant gro they feed me now huh?"
"Oh not happening, not happening." Cassie eyes stared off into space "No no n.. N.. N.. Yes! Yes that's the spot! Oh God yes!"
VRROOM!! Roared a diesel engine from by the door, Ash stood defiant, clouds of blue smoke rising from his chainsaw "Alright beastie, it's harvest time!"
"Fucking cockblock!" Raged the leafy monstrosity, vines flew through the air, Ash twirled away from them, bringing around his chainsaw and ripping through the fighting foliage, twisted vines fell to the ground and flopped about helplessly, a huge hand shaped branch came at him and he brought his Excalibur up, bits of twig and stick flew through the air and the creature roared in surprise and pain.
Cassie meanwhile used the distraction to unwind herself from the limpening vines holding her down, then looked fearfully down between her legs, pity he was a giant psychotic rapist shrubbery, they could have really had some thing there, she gripped it and the plant's attention was suddenly back to her "Hey, I ain't done with you yet! Damn woman, you have your fun and leave me hanging.." The vine twisted itself tightly around her ankles and he turned back to Ash who was tearing through the plants weird garden body.
Through a flourish of leaves and blue smoke he stood above her "Sorry, I interrupt something between the two of you?"
"Well my big O isn't going to turn up now so you might as well help me."
"Your call baby." And Ash brought the chainsaw up and blazed through the vine binding, the shrubbery roared loud enough to rattle the windows.
"Oh you sick bastard! You son of a bitch Lorena Bobbit wannabe you cut off my pollinating gland!!"
"I didn't know you were Jewish." Cassie remarked, Ash snatched her up before dozens of branches and vines whacked down and ripped at where they had been moments before. The rolled into a huge display case of pesticides and various chemical, cans and sprays fell to the ground Ash pounced on them.
"Come on.. Come on.." He murmured sorting through them finally he picked one up aerosol can 'Roundup' "Yes!" Ash remarked as he spotted the tiny flammable signal, he pulled off the cap and spray it then whipped out his Zippo lighter and lit the fumes, the tiny flame blazed about and sucked itself down the little spray hole. Ash stood up holding the smouldering can.
"Hey Shiteater, your ass is grass."
"Yes and my appendix is that rose bush what's your.. Oh God no!" The shrubbery yelled as Ash hurled the smoking Roundup into it's leafy maw, it exploded with a flash of orange and the plant creature immediately started blazing.
"Ahh! All I wanted was a booty call!" Yelled the burning bush, "Oh what a world what a world!" it crashed to the ground, sending smouldering ash and flaming leaves spiralling towards the ceiling.
Ash coughed at the smoke and ran a hand through his hair "Kills, weeds, dead."
"Uh, thanks Ash." Cassie said, sitting up and rubbing her head.
"Yeah! You're a saint!" Jake yelled from somewhere in the nursery, voice cracking slightly.
"Jake are you okay?" Ash called.
"Oh, ow, yeah fine."
"Good, keep loading up the fertilizer."
"Can do Mr Williams sir."
Ash turned to Cassie, blatantly catching an eyeful, "Whats say we get you to Woman's Wear?"
"Yeah." she shakily got to her feet, "Little help?" Ash put his arm around her bare shoulder and they waddled out, Cassie decidedly bow-legged.
"You gonna be okay there?"
"Physically, though I pity the man who has to follow that act."
Minutes later Cassie picked out a set of clothes in her size off the rack and dressed in the isle, she noticed Ash watching her carefully, "You mind? Little privacy?"
"Babe I don't think you got anything new for me to see, but sorry, I'm just thinking about the transference of genetic material."
"That's a romantic way of putting it."
"No, you see, back when my life was first going to Hell one of the girls I was with wandered into the forest, came back a zombie, it didn't show at first though, I'm just wondering.." A yell interrupted, Rachel's voice calling his name, Ash stopped in mid-sentence, a demonic squawk cut the air "Kee-RAWK!!" and he was off without another word.
Cassie half started after him but her knees still felt like jelly and collapsed to the ground instead, she groaned, it felt almost like something was squirming about inside her.
"Bastard pot plant, bet he won't even call now." She slumped unconscious.
~Chapter Sixteen~
They stood worried as gunshots cracked, Rachel half started, Tobias nearly took to the wing, but Ash finally blew out of the frosted glass doors.
"You okay?" Marco asked.
"Everything's fine, I just thought this place would be secure but maybe a couple of zombies slipped through other ways, you two go find the shit we need, Aisle Four, but for God's sake keep your eyes open."
"You got it boss-man." Ben said, He and Marco marched off, "Hard ass." one of them muttered.
Ash offered Rachel his arm "Shall we ma'am?"
Rachel laughed and took his arm, "Lead the way." They walked towards Sporting Goods, Tobias narrowed his eyes and flapped off to land on Rachel's shoulder between their heads.
[Gee this is cosy.] He announced and glared at Ash, Ash glared back, as they disappeared down the aisle both were so concentrated on the other that no one noticed the two female figures that approached the store doors.
The matching Jonson sisters still in their matching blue gingham, their fierce eyes observed the smashed glass where they had broken in, then looked at the other "They went in here." Lisa said.
"I concur." Kim replied, they concentrated on the locks again, achingly the bolt slid out it's rest and the doors swung open, letting in a draft that blew several leaves onto the glass sprinkled floor as two identical pairs of black shoes stepped inside, The Jonson sisters turned to their left, towards the nursery then in the same moment their heads snapped to the right where Marco and Ben had disappeared into the shelves.
"Thisaway." Kim said.
"Ditto." Lisa replied.
Matching black shoes clocking on the linoleum, matching gingham dress swishing around their undead but still perfect rears, identical blond pigtails trailing over their shoulders Lisa and Kim marched towards the trace signal of Marco's energy, nobody, but nobody stood up the Jonson sisters.
They got to Sporting Goods and Ash vaulted over the hunting counter, it was a glass cabinet filled with hunting knifes and box after box of ammunition, the wall behind was lined with hunting rifles and shotguns.
"Locked, this is gonna take some finesse." Ash said after inspecting the back of the cabinets, he hopped back up, looked down through the glass and ploughed his metal fist through the top, Tobias winced at the sound.
[Y'know you're bloody liable to set off alarms like that.]
Ash looked at him, "We don't have alarms, but then, I'd know something like that wouldn't I? Plus think the cops 'round these parts are gonna have more shit on their hands than they can handle tonight already, out fighting zombies or checking kids candy for razor blades, All Hallows Eve, magical night innit?" He began stuffing boxes of buckshot into his pockets with a certain childlike greed.
"Hmm, his eyes fell on a particularly large hunting knife, at least a foot long in all, he already had his chainsaw but it didn't hurt to spoil himself once in a while, he grabbed the knife and leather sheath and jammed it into his belt on his left hip, just above where his chainsaw hung in it's scabbard.
He looked up at the expectant Rachel and Tobias who had flapped on top of one of the shelves and glared at him possessively, "For the lady?"
"Huh?"
"Ma'am you look like a gal ready to go on out and bag yourself a serious trophy, I got just the thing." He turned around and after brief consideration plucked a particularly fine gun from the wall "Mossberg 500 Tactical" He said as he turned back, "It's a beautiful gun and no denying, perfect for a lady on the go such as yourself."
"Oh, I don't know if I should, I usually just morph."
"I saw you with that gun in your hands and I thought now there's a woman who can handle her boomstick."
"You really think so? It's never appealed to me before, I like the personal approach."
"Maybe you just haven't wrapped your hands around the right calibre just yet." Ash hoarsely whispered, Tobias still stared, hearing every word. Ash stepped back, "This baby comes with the 590 heatsheild and Ghost Ring sights, it's chambered for.410m, weighs a little over three kilos, here, hold her, see how you like the feel." He handed the gun to her.
Rachel nodded, "Feels good." she admitted, "I can see how you get along here."
"House wares is still my calling ma'am but it doesn't hurt to know a little bit about everything, she's a beaut I tell you a real beaut, carries seven in an under barrel magazine just there, I tell you if a gun was about to pry me away from the Remington it would be a Mossberg."
"You're a good salesmen but I'm just here to use the bathroom." She smiled.
"So don't make your decision now, I just want you to keep in mind." His face was very close to hers at this point "That there are, always, other options." She nodded mutely.
[Yeah say that's great Ash, gee look at the time, maybe you should check on the others.]
Ash turned from Rachel and smiled thinly at him, "Actually you probably should." Rachel said.
"Your wish is my command." With a hand resting on the butt of his chainsaw he walked around the counter and down the aisle, towards the nursery once more "You guys see anything you like just go on and spoil yourself, I'm getting a great employees discount tonight." He called before turning the corner.
As he wandered down the front of the store, his mind grinding slowly he walked past the open doors without a thought and towards the nursery, stopping in confusion before he reached the door, it sounded almost like someone was having sex in there, slowly, carefully he pushed the door open.
[Well do you find him attractive?]
Rachel was staring down the barrel of the Mossberg, she spun to him and he was staring straight down the guns bore, he fluttered a moment in disquiet, "What?"
[Ash. Do you find him attractive?] Tobias repeated.
"Well, I guess, sure some people might say he's attractive, you know, if you're into that whole rugged, manly, unshaven, brawny, alpha male look."
[Oh and you're not?] Tobias sneered.
Rachel put the gun to her side and looked at him seriously "I'm dating you aren't I?"
Tobias took a beat or two to think that one out. [... Oh, ha ha, very droll.]
"I thought so."
Silence drew out into the minutes as Rachel inspected the cabinet, poking at the boxes of ammo and admiring the various knifes while Tobias watched her and preened with a vengeance.
[You really believe his whole story?]
"What, the cabin and the living forest and that whole time travel bit?" Rachel asked.
[Yeah, seems a little suspect too me.] Tobias answered.
"Hey, we're living proof stranger things can and will happen."
[I still don't like it, sounds like the plot for some bad cult B-movie.]
"Uh-huh, uh-huh." Rachel said, concentrating far more on loading the Mossberg (just to see how it felt of course, she told herself, she wasn't so smitten with him to change her fighting ways, yet.)
[You're not listening too m..] suddenly something had dropped from the heavens and landed with a splat of Tobias' head [Gaa! What the hell is this?] He flapped about and squawked loudly in sudden panic, this at least caused the slimey question mark, it felt like the drool of some terrible beast to Tobias, to slid off and disappear into the shelves. He flew to the ground wildly, scanning the ceiling for whatever might have dropped but could see no Alien-esque beastie waiting for it's chance to drop and turn his ass into Kentucky fried.
Rachel dropped the gun and ran to him "Tobias? Are you okay? What happened?"
Tobias breathed, [Something, I don't know what, dropped on my head.] Rachel knelt down and examined him, his feathered head was streaked with red stripes.
"It looks, like, like blood or something, a big drop of blood?" She stammered.
[I guess, God I got the taste in my mouth now, blood, and something else, something familiar. . . Bleh.]
"Sure your okay?"
[I'm fine, I'm fi. .] Suddenly his little body racked with convulsions. [Aww shit, I ain't fine.] Black cracks seem to swarm up amongst his feathers for a moment the subsided, he collapsed, seemingly unconscious.
"Tobias?" Rachel prodded at his side gently then drew back quickly as his body seemed to be swelling all over "Are you morphing?" But it didn't look like morphing, he appeared to be blowing up like a balloon, she got up, stepped back, rolls of flesh seemed to rise and fall under his feathery skin, his body was becoming bloated. "T-Tobias?"
Finally he looked up at her and she gasped in shock, his neck now stood out repulsively and his face seemed to have devolved to a previous point in history with a streamlined somehow reptilian head shape, his eyes rolled back to complete yellow, his beak was longer, bigger and serrated into saw tooth edges.
He jumped onto his feet, claws just as fierce before but now even bigger and considered her, his wings had not grown with his bloated body and remained stunted little mockeries [Polly want... Your soul!!]
He leapt into the air his wings exploded outwards, feathers flying in all direction in a microsecond they had expanded to giant leathery bat wings, easily six foot from tip to tip, that would have looked more at home on a dinosaur from Earth's ancient past.
"Ash! ASH!!" Rachel yelled barely realising she was doing it.
"Kee-RAWK!!" Screeched the monstrosity as it took off, flapping those huge powerful wings effortlessly for lift it came swooping down, she dived just in time to avoid having her face taken off, Tobias continued on, smashing apart a stand of sunglasses as he went.
"Asssshh!!" Rachel screamed, morphing would be useless to her; she'd be defence less against this monster if she tried, she dropped and rolled, what could she do? Then she spotted it, sitting right in front of her was the Mossberg 500, right where she'd dropped it when she ran for Tobias, loaded and ready to go.
She grabbed and heaved herself up, chambering a shell, "Pull!" She fired off a shot, it smacked Tobias dead on, he flew through the air, blood and feathers fluttering about him he nearly fell from the air but kept steady.
Ash ran to the end of the aisle, for a moment unable to compute what he was seeing, around the roof rafter a swelled and mutated Tobias flapped about, Rachel pulled off three shots in quick succession, two connected dead on, one punching into his stomach the other ripping through the membrane of his wing but still he flew.
[Bombs away bitch!] It screeched and dive-bombed her, one claw knocked the gun out her grasp and it skittered over the floor, the other ripped a deep furrow in her left shoulder, she was forced to the ground by his beating leathery wings, Ash started for her and the mutant Tobias spotted him.
[You! Try and steal my girl will'ya?]
Ash stumbled back, "Ah sorry man, I was y'know, unclear on the guy rules if the girl's dating a bird."
[Human in bird's body! Damnit, y'know, I can be human sometimes.]
"See! See! I did not know that." Tobias let out a screech of anger and dived at him, Ash pulled out his Remington but it was knocked from his grasp when Tobias hit him full pelt in the chest.
Ash's world became one of scratching claws and beating wings, Tobias sunk his ferocious claws into his belly and pecked at his face with that serrated beak, Ash pushed his arm between his body and Tobias, his metal fingers were grasping for the hunting knife but he just couldn't reach, crushed under the weight of the bloated maddened mutant.
Rachel ignored the gushing pain in her shoulder and slowly she crept up behind Tobias, she found the Mossberg and waited till she was right behind him, staring down his puckered little bird rectum, she drew back the gun and shoved mightily.
Tobias pupil-less eyes bulged til they nearly fell right out of his ugly head, Rachel's finger tightened on the trigger "See how you like it stuck there honey!" She yelled, the explosion of the gun was deafening, feathers flew outwards in a cloud. When they cleared however Tobias still stayed in one piece, absolutely motionless perched on Ash's stomach, a look of utter shock on his pointed face, all his feathers were fluttering to the ground as he was now as bald as a plucked chicken.
Rachel drew back the Mossberg with an audible pop, Tobias didn't even flinch, after a moment or two however a small lump travelled up his scraggly throat, he hoarsely coughed a puff of smoke, his jaw remained dropped open as if unhinged, a pellet of buckshot dripped out of his beak and onto Ash's chest, followed by a second, then a third that rolled off Ash's side to the ground.
[. . .Ouch. . .]
Tobias's eyes glazed over and a little rivulet of blood began to run out of his beak, he rocked to the side and smacked the ground, about as threatening as a Thanksgiving dinner.
Ash climbed to his elbows and looked at Rachel, bleeding, beaten, clutching her Mossberg, "You okay?"
"Nothing a quick morph won't fix, you?"
"I've shook off worse."
A long silent minute ticked out.
"Is it wrong to be turned on right now?"
"Little bit, yeah."
"Yeah, I thought as much."
~Chapter Seventeen~
"So what are we looking for anyhow?" Marco asked Ben as they wandered down the aisle.
"Well ya see the chemical fertilizer is great fuel for bomb making but it still needs a smaller explosion to trigger it into exploding, we're looking for the trigger." Ben said, he stopped, grabbed a can off the shelf and pointed to the flammable symbol. "This'll do, well that's enough work, smoko break."
He sat down and leaned against the shelf, Marco squatted beside him, Ben rummaged through his pockets and finally found what he was looking for, a prerolled fatty and a little book of matches, he seemed to think for a moment then handed them to Marco, "Here, you wanna do the honours?"
Marco took the stuff, shook his head and instead stuck them in his jacket pocket, "Nah man, listen are you sure that this is the stuff we need cause maybe we should check."
"You don't trust my judgement?"
"Ben, you're a fried out stoner asshole."
"Yeah that's true."
Marco sighed and sat down next to him, leaned back and was considering taking the joint back out his pocket, when a ringing voice in stereo sounded from the end of the aisle.
"Marco." He jerked up and looked in the direction of the voices, the Jonson sisters were standing their, holding hands and still dressed in their gingham but now looking as if they were lit up with some demonic light at their backs.
"Marco. Come play with us Marco."
Marco and Ben slowly rose to their feet and stared, mouths gaping.
Within a blink it seemed the girls teleported to bridge half the distance between them, they looked from one to the other simultaneously, "Marco.. Ben.. Come play with us, come play with us Marco and Ben."
"Uhh, okay, what's your game, Chess? Monopoly?" Marco asked.
The girls giggled but it was no longer a sweet innocent sound, it was a demonic tinkling, evil and yet somehow more seductive, both put their right index fingers to their pouting lips and sucked gently on the tips, "Come play with us, come play with us, forever, and ever, and ever, and ever.."
"Hey if you got the money I got the time girls." Interrupted Ben, still wide and starry eyed.
The girls were smiling matching predatory grins at this point and Marco couldn't help but notice how long and wolf like their canines were, all almost two inches long, they looked at one another with evil glee then back to the boys, another split second and they had bridged the rest of the distance and were standing right in front of them, both grabbed the front of the boys' shirts and pulled them closer.
"I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul!" Growled Lisa, holding Marco.
Kim shrugged, "I'll spit." She admitted and both pulled them to the floor.
"Gah! OH! OW!! Oh man that's good!!"
Sweating, heaving minutes later the four lay entangled on the linoleum floor.
"That was.. Different.." Panted Lisa.
"Yeah, that 360 head spin thing, you do that with all the guys?" Marco asked.
"No I was just caught in the moment." She replied
"Dude." Ben held up his hand, Marco grinned and high fived him.
"OhmyGod, you guys are pigs!" Kim said "I can't believe I gave you my flower!"
Lisa looked over "OhmyGod, will you please stop calling it that? You are such a goody goody."
"And you are such a bitch, get out of my face."
"Please." Lisa turned to Marco "Call me." And the girls disappear in two flashes of light.
"Ouch, they couldn't have just walked off?" Marco asked, "That singed hair in delicate places."
"Yeah but it beats pillow talk I spose." Ben said, he grabbed at his crotch and pealed off his rubber "Good thing I wear one of these at all times."
Marco looked Ben up and down, Ben did the same to Marco.
"No eye contact for three weeks." Marco said finally.
"Agreed."
Marco eyed the condom, "Oh Christ, will you get rid of that thing? It's dripping hymn blood."
Ben looked at it, a drop of blood dripped off, fell to the floor and began to sizzle and eat away at the white linoleum, "Ahh yeah sure." He tied a knot in the top and flung it over the shelves.
"There, now.." He stopped, from the direction Ben had thrown too there was the sound of panicked squawking.
[Gaa! What the hell is this?] They heard Tobias' yell.
Marco shook his head, "They ask, we don't know nothing, lets get dressed."
***To Be Continued***
Britz-Christ, you gotta write me a review just to let me know who got through that monster, bloody hell that was rough, think I'll go lie down for a while, scuse me.