A/N: Damn! When was the last time I updated. Whoo… Hahahaha. Sorry 'bout that, kiddies. Didn't mean any harm. I've just been mad busy or mad lazy. Either/or we've gotta get this little fic finished, eh? =) So… I know the fifth book has come out but I'm not going to let that interfere with this story. It probably won't at any rate. But I started writing this before the book came out so I'm going to pretend it doesn't exist right now. Yeah, bite me. Chapter 4… here we go. Cheers, mates!

Disclaimer: If I owned HP, you can bet your pansy ass I wouldn't be writing here.

Peace of Mind

The abrupt burst of shrilling screams jerked Flint awake. He rolled to his feet, forgot he was sleeping in a hammock, twisted his foot in the straw, and fell headfirst onto the wooden deck of the small boat.

He muttered a quick profanity under his mouth and quickly righted himself.

The entire forest had exploded into life. The sharp, staccato bursts of ear-piercing screams filled the air.

"Howler monkeys, Flint. Keep your knickers on."

He hadn't even noticed Katie. She was sitting cross-legged on the banister of the boat, gracefully peeling a pear. She looked totally at peace with the moonlight swathing over her, balanced like a graceful cat, daintily eating the pear in her right hand. Flint began to wonder if she ever slept.

"You get used to it after a while," she said with a tiny shrug.

"So what're you doing? Waiting for them to start screaming?" Flint frowned. He sat down on the deck and frowned. He was beginning to think he wasn't cut out for this back-breaking sort of life.

"What do you think?" Katie frowned.

"Well, I'm beginning to think you don't sleep at all," Flint retorted.

"I don't sleep much," Katie admitted.

"Why not?"

There was a pause. Katie caught herself before she blurted out the truth about her nightmares and insomnia. It was unnerving how Flint managed to get beneath her skin. He'd always been able to irk her like that, but she'd be a fool to give him the upper hand again.

"Don't need it," she answered succinctly.

He didn't push her.

She remained silent. Strands of honey gold hair flit across her face and she pushed them back impatiently. She looked at the pear she was holding with retained disgust and chucked it into the murky waters of the African river they were quietly streaming along. She felt very odd in that moment, very alone.

"Bell--" Flint didn't get to finish.

"Why are you doing this?" Katie blurted suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"Why are you doing this to me? Another score for Marcus Flint? Haven't we both had enough… You could have gotten anyone and you and I both know that. You purposely forced me into a corner, and you knew I wouldn't say no, so why? Why me? Why now? Why at all? What does it matter to you if my Reservations go under," Katie exploded.

She pushed herself off the railing and threw the paring knife she'd been holding across the deck. The clatter of its collision was drowned out by the screaming around them.

Flint was more than a little surprised at her sudden outburst but he'd been expecting it for a while. He fluidly moved to his feet and took a dangerous step towards her. She backed away, flinching as if he'd actually touched her.

"Confession time, is that it?" Flint sighed.

Katie looked up and saw a different Flint. Not the one that she'd hated for years, but someone much older, much lonelier, and much more human. She recognized the sudden tiredness of his face because she had seen it so often on her own. Flint was tired.

"Confession f-for what?" She choked out.

"Well, you're right, aren't you, Bell? I shouldn't care. I shouldn't fucking care at all. But I do. And it's been eating away at me because I haven't lived up to my word," Flint said flatly.

"What word?"

Flint bent slightly, reaching into his pocket and pulled out a tatty-looking, black handkerchief. He grabbed her wrist, watched as she jerked back as if she'd been slapped, and placed the handkerchief in her open palm. He released his hold on her just as suddenly as he'd encircled her wrist and stepped backwards. He looked at her, his grey eyes boring holes into her, turned, and walked below deck to finally get some decent sleep.

Katie was left standing by herself in the moonlight.

Her hand shook as she unfolded the crumpled handkerchief.

Her breath caught painfully in her throat and she felt her heart stop as she stared at what Flint had given her. The small, perfect, golden ring that lay in her palm was the mirror image of the one she used to wear on her own hand… It had belonged to Oliver. His wedding ring. Her hand moved forward to touch it, to try and remember what it had been like…

It was still warm.

Her hand wrenched backwards as if she'd been burned.

For the first time in a long time, she thought she felt the tears roiling up. But no. She was done. It was over. She'd closed that part of her life. At least that's what she told herself. Unfortunately, her past had come to stalk her… embodied in Marcus Flint himself.

"How?"

Flint looked up from his uncomfortable position on a stack of boxes he'd been attempting to use as a bed.

She didn't need to elaborate.

How did you get my dead husband's wedding ring?

Flint smirked at the idea of hearing that particular question come out of her mouth.

"I told you. I was the last one to see him alive," he shrugged.

Katie swallowed visibly.

"Are you finally ready to listen to me then?" Flint sighed.

She nodded.

Flint paused.

"Look, Bell. I'm not an idiot. I know you think I'm a bastard. I know you blame me for what happened to Wood. I can't say I disagree all that much with you. It was my fault. I should've known better. It was a shitty situation, but that's it. That's all I could do. You think I don't wonder why it was him instead of me? You think I don't wish that it had been me instead of him that night?

"You're lucky. You were born with a choice to be who you wanted to be. Me. No. I was force-fed my entire life and when I finally got the bollocks to cut my ties it was a little too late. But again, my fault. I wasn't looking to be a hero, Bell. I was looking for some peace of mind. So I offered to lead the raid, I regurgitated the information, and off we went.

"And Wood… Wood came along. And he was caught. And he was killed. But he'd made me swear even before the attack that I would make sure you were all right if he didn't come back. He gave me the ring to hold. I suppose I would've given him something to hold for me, too. But I didn't have anything of worth to me, I didn't have anyone who would cry for me if I was sent home in a matchbox. And that was the way it went.

"And I didn't give it to you, because I knew you'd slam the door in my face and try to kill me on sight. But it's been eating away at me and I'm fucking tired, Bell. I just want what I always wanted. Some peace of mind. To be left alone. So that's it. You're my last tie. I thought if I could get you to forgive me, I could die in peace.

"That's why. That's why it's you, it's now. That's why any of this exists at all. Because I'm a selfish shithead who just wants to die in peace."

Katie had lost the ability to speak some time during the tirade.

"So can you forgive me, Bell?" Flint snarled.

She stared numbly at him.

"That's what I thought. A Flint's luck, right? So I'll guess I'll have to live with it for the rest of my life like you do. Sorry, Bell. I really am. But that's the way it goes," Flint snapped.

He turned around, indicating that the conversation was over.

Katie swallowed, headed for the deck, and left him alone to sleep. For the first time in years, no, probably in her entire life, she had seen Marcus Flint as a living, breathing person.

Now things would have to change.

She looked at the ring in her palm. Without a second's hesitation, she dropped it into the river and watched the glinting gold disappear forever into the muddy waters.

"Bye, Ollie."