AN: I'm ba-ack. With another little TyKa thing. And yet again Kai is
completely OOC (ugh! I hate that but, I can't seem to help it!) It's a
songfic to the song Run to You from the Bodyguard soundtrack. And it's a
nice little one-shot with a fluffy ending to counteract the last TyKa I
wrote which had me depressed for ages. It was written in about 30 minutes
late at night and has no bearing to the show really, at all. umm. Put it
down to exhaustion and a love of TyKa, blame my muses, whatever. just
please read and review.
WARNING!: Shounen ai, slash, male/male relationship and kissing
Disclaimer: I own neither Beyblade nor the song, I am poor and penniless and am getting nothing from this fic other than the satisfaction of getting the damn plot-bunny off my back.
Run to You
Kai looked down at his hands: they were shaking. Over recent weeks he had been straining to maintain his control. It just broke down for no reason. He'd kept those shield up for so long and they had taken so long to put up, but now they were flickering on and off and he knew some of his true feelings must be showing through.
He was tired; tired of having to be the person he had to be, tired of hiding. But he couldn't stop it; he could never stop it. To stop it would be to show weakness and he had promised her he'd never show weakness to anyone again. He promised her he'd be strong. But it was so difficult to be the cold, isolated, controlled one. It was so difficult to stay separate. But it would be more difficult to change. He was stuck in this persona now and forever, it was what people expected, it was what they knew.
I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in my heart you'd find
The wind ruffled through his hair as he just leaned against the balcony of their latest hotel. It had been a beautiful sunset, he thought to himself, but that had been hours ago. He'd come out here to think and now look what had happened, he'd lost track of time. They had a battle tomorrow and he had to be at his best condition, and that meant sleep. He had to go back inside and sleep.
He didn't move. None of his body was responding, it just stayed standing there, staring at the moon and the stars and revelling in the fact that it was night. This half of the world was asleep and for just these few fragile moments he didn't have to be the Kai he was supposed to be. He'd always loved the night-time. It was like a protective cocoon, no one could see you other than the stars, and they would never tell. He remembered her telling him that if he had to tell the stars his secrets. they wouldn't betray him. And so he had. A smile crept unknown to his face, taking advantage of his lack of attention. As soon as he realised it was there he banished it again. It was not safe enough to do that.
He was sharing a room with Tyson. Typical. He always found that his shields were the worst around the blue haired boy. They faltered if he so much as looked at him and Kai always had to keep a constant vigil on his face. His personality was worse than ever around Dragoon's master because he was afraid if it wasn't he would slip up and let something show.
He was scared of revealing too much and most of all he was scared f the way he felt when those shields fell: like he wanted them to be down. He felt like he wanted help, as though he wanted someone to see beyond them. He felt as though he wanted someone to help him, and just the thought o admitting weakness to anyone terrified him.
A guy who's scared sometimes
Who isn't always strong
Can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all alone
But still, it was difficult, even with Tyson sleeping peacefully a few metres away; it was difficult to control the urge to break the mould. Sometimes he just wanted to turn to the younger boy and let everything drop. What scared him the most was that it wasn't just anyone he wanted to reveal himself to, it was Tyson. It was the loud-mouthed baka he had been trying to avoid contact with all this time. He had this feeling that Tyson would understand.
But what if he couldn't? What if seeing Kai without the barriers creeped
him out? What if he didn't want to know, if he didn't want the complications? Kai knew that if he pulled those barriers down completely it would be hell to get them back up and Tyson could hurt him before he'd even
had a chance at protection.
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
It was an elaborate dance, a play. He just walked around and did all the things expected of him. He yelled, he made the cutting remarks, he treated them all as inferior, but they weren't. At least they all had the strength to be themselves. He didn't. He just hid behind the mask of never-ending disinterest and prayed that they never asked what was behind it. He knew that he couldn't cope with the questions.
After he'd walked through the day as his well-known asshole of a self he came home and he just wanted to stop it. But he continued he kept on at it, even when there was no one there he kept it up. No one there to talk to, no one there to be with. None of the others ever seemed to want to even worry
really. He was Kai, he didn't need anyone, and they accepted that. He'd
forced them to accept that.
Each day, each day I play the role
Of someone always in control
But at night I come home and turn the key
There's nobody there, no one cares for me
What's the sense of trying hard to find your dreams
Without someone to share it with
Tell me what does it mean?
"Kai?" The façade was so good even his shock at being interrupted didn't break it. He just turned and shot a glare at Tyson, who was standing in the doorway bleary eyed and dishevelled. "Are you ok?" The look of concern that filled the huge eyes was too much, he felt the mask falter slightly, and just for a second, the glare fell. He recovered quickly, hoping Tyson hadn't noticed, and turning away to the view again. "Kai?"
The voice was worried, worried for him. It took all his strength not to turn back. What was it about Tyson that made him get through all the defences he'd worked so long to develop? How did he manage it? It wasn't like he was especially empathic or clever. But he just seemed to open Kai up; no matter how many locks he'd added. At the moment he just wanted to turn to him and let those defences drop.
"Tyson." the word slipped out of his mouth before he could sensor it. And there it was, hanging in the air. Damn those defences! Damn Tyson and damn everything. Why now, why today? He stayed there, stubbornly looking out and refusing to turn back.
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
"Yes Kai?" A hand on his shoulder the feel of breath on his cheek and they slipped entirely. He had no control, he turned and heard Tyson's breath catch in his throat. There was silence and Kai felt so exposed. He wanted to pull the shields back up, but they were too heavy. He strained and pulled at them yet they refused to heed him.
A warm hand touched his cheek and Kai realised that Tyson was a whole lot closer than he had been. Panic rose in his chest. Tyson was too close, far too close.
He regained control of himself for a millisecond and turned away, closing his eyes so Tyson couldn't see them anymore, and so he couldn't see Tyson. But the hand pulled his face back and his eyes opened automatically to see Tyson's face approaching his.
"Don't hide, Kai." it was a fleeting whisper, "I'm not going to leave." And then Tyson's lips were on his and he found himself lost in a sea of emotions suppressed for far too long. They all vied for superiority, pushing and pulling at him. But for once he didn't try to control them, he just let them wash over him. And then the storm had passed and all that was left was a strange feeling of warmth and a relief that now, at least to one person, he didn't have to hide.
His arms encircled Tyson's waist and he melted into the kiss, relying on
someone else to look after him for once.
I need you here
I need you here to wipe away my tears
To kiss away my fears
If you only knew how much...
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
OWARI
Please read and review
WARNING!: Shounen ai, slash, male/male relationship and kissing
Disclaimer: I own neither Beyblade nor the song, I am poor and penniless and am getting nothing from this fic other than the satisfaction of getting the damn plot-bunny off my back.
Run to You
Kai looked down at his hands: they were shaking. Over recent weeks he had been straining to maintain his control. It just broke down for no reason. He'd kept those shield up for so long and they had taken so long to put up, but now they were flickering on and off and he knew some of his true feelings must be showing through.
He was tired; tired of having to be the person he had to be, tired of hiding. But he couldn't stop it; he could never stop it. To stop it would be to show weakness and he had promised her he'd never show weakness to anyone again. He promised her he'd be strong. But it was so difficult to be the cold, isolated, controlled one. It was so difficult to stay separate. But it would be more difficult to change. He was stuck in this persona now and forever, it was what people expected, it was what they knew.
I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in my heart you'd find
The wind ruffled through his hair as he just leaned against the balcony of their latest hotel. It had been a beautiful sunset, he thought to himself, but that had been hours ago. He'd come out here to think and now look what had happened, he'd lost track of time. They had a battle tomorrow and he had to be at his best condition, and that meant sleep. He had to go back inside and sleep.
He didn't move. None of his body was responding, it just stayed standing there, staring at the moon and the stars and revelling in the fact that it was night. This half of the world was asleep and for just these few fragile moments he didn't have to be the Kai he was supposed to be. He'd always loved the night-time. It was like a protective cocoon, no one could see you other than the stars, and they would never tell. He remembered her telling him that if he had to tell the stars his secrets. they wouldn't betray him. And so he had. A smile crept unknown to his face, taking advantage of his lack of attention. As soon as he realised it was there he banished it again. It was not safe enough to do that.
He was sharing a room with Tyson. Typical. He always found that his shields were the worst around the blue haired boy. They faltered if he so much as looked at him and Kai always had to keep a constant vigil on his face. His personality was worse than ever around Dragoon's master because he was afraid if it wasn't he would slip up and let something show.
He was scared of revealing too much and most of all he was scared f the way he felt when those shields fell: like he wanted them to be down. He felt like he wanted help, as though he wanted someone to see beyond them. He felt as though he wanted someone to help him, and just the thought o admitting weakness to anyone terrified him.
A guy who's scared sometimes
Who isn't always strong
Can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all alone
But still, it was difficult, even with Tyson sleeping peacefully a few metres away; it was difficult to control the urge to break the mould. Sometimes he just wanted to turn to the younger boy and let everything drop. What scared him the most was that it wasn't just anyone he wanted to reveal himself to, it was Tyson. It was the loud-mouthed baka he had been trying to avoid contact with all this time. He had this feeling that Tyson would understand.
But what if he couldn't? What if seeing Kai without the barriers creeped
him out? What if he didn't want to know, if he didn't want the complications? Kai knew that if he pulled those barriers down completely it would be hell to get them back up and Tyson could hurt him before he'd even
had a chance at protection.
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
It was an elaborate dance, a play. He just walked around and did all the things expected of him. He yelled, he made the cutting remarks, he treated them all as inferior, but they weren't. At least they all had the strength to be themselves. He didn't. He just hid behind the mask of never-ending disinterest and prayed that they never asked what was behind it. He knew that he couldn't cope with the questions.
After he'd walked through the day as his well-known asshole of a self he came home and he just wanted to stop it. But he continued he kept on at it, even when there was no one there he kept it up. No one there to talk to, no one there to be with. None of the others ever seemed to want to even worry
really. He was Kai, he didn't need anyone, and they accepted that. He'd
forced them to accept that.
Each day, each day I play the role
Of someone always in control
But at night I come home and turn the key
There's nobody there, no one cares for me
What's the sense of trying hard to find your dreams
Without someone to share it with
Tell me what does it mean?
"Kai?" The façade was so good even his shock at being interrupted didn't break it. He just turned and shot a glare at Tyson, who was standing in the doorway bleary eyed and dishevelled. "Are you ok?" The look of concern that filled the huge eyes was too much, he felt the mask falter slightly, and just for a second, the glare fell. He recovered quickly, hoping Tyson hadn't noticed, and turning away to the view again. "Kai?"
The voice was worried, worried for him. It took all his strength not to turn back. What was it about Tyson that made him get through all the defences he'd worked so long to develop? How did he manage it? It wasn't like he was especially empathic or clever. But he just seemed to open Kai up; no matter how many locks he'd added. At the moment he just wanted to turn to him and let those defences drop.
"Tyson." the word slipped out of his mouth before he could sensor it. And there it was, hanging in the air. Damn those defences! Damn Tyson and damn everything. Why now, why today? He stayed there, stubbornly looking out and refusing to turn back.
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
"Yes Kai?" A hand on his shoulder the feel of breath on his cheek and they slipped entirely. He had no control, he turned and heard Tyson's breath catch in his throat. There was silence and Kai felt so exposed. He wanted to pull the shields back up, but they were too heavy. He strained and pulled at them yet they refused to heed him.
A warm hand touched his cheek and Kai realised that Tyson was a whole lot closer than he had been. Panic rose in his chest. Tyson was too close, far too close.
He regained control of himself for a millisecond and turned away, closing his eyes so Tyson couldn't see them anymore, and so he couldn't see Tyson. But the hand pulled his face back and his eyes opened automatically to see Tyson's face approaching his.
"Don't hide, Kai." it was a fleeting whisper, "I'm not going to leave." And then Tyson's lips were on his and he found himself lost in a sea of emotions suppressed for far too long. They all vied for superiority, pushing and pulling at him. But for once he didn't try to control them, he just let them wash over him. And then the storm had passed and all that was left was a strange feeling of warmth and a relief that now, at least to one person, he didn't have to hide.
His arms encircled Tyson's waist and he melted into the kiss, relying on
someone else to look after him for once.
I need you here
I need you here to wipe away my tears
To kiss away my fears
If you only knew how much...
I wanna run to you
I wanna run to you
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I wanna run to you
But if I come to you
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away
OWARI
Please read and review