Howdy! I just got back from vacation! It was horrible, the worst part wasn't all the smelly old people that I barely knew, it was that there wasn't a computer in sight!!!!!!! I'm suffering from internet deprivation. –Sniff, Sniff- Okay so while I was avoiding the weird hicks/cousins I revamped my story. I completely redid what my premise was. It is a little stranger than I originally had it, true. But it is so much better. It's....deeper. You'll see what I mean. R&R!
'Till the End
Chapter Nine
Confusion
When they got back to the mansion Logan and Rogue went about their business like nothing unusual had happened. Rogue and Logan said good night and went their separate ways. Rogue went to bed pretending to mourn for her dear friend, all the while talking to her within her own head. The most important conversation was this:
** D.R. I-I don't know how to deal with this "relationship" with Logan. I mean... I've always known that I felt something for him. And you must admit he is a HUNK. But I always thought he was out of my league. That's why I went after Scott in the first place. Granted he too was and still is out of my league. Besides I didn't feel for him the way I feel for Logan-sigh-. This is deeper. This is something that can't be stomped down. 'Cause I tried and it didn't work. But...I'm so confused.
I know that he's too old for me. But nobody alive (no offense **None taken**) is old enough for him. I know that I should step back and take a good long look at this so called "relationship." I should evaluate the pros and cons; I should see which way the scales tip. But I CAN'T! I just want him to touch me, to kiss me I need him D.R. Like an addict needs cocaine. And we've only just had our first kiss.**
** Y'all dun child? Good. Now let me trahy ta help ya wid yer confusion. Ah believe that ya should follah yer heart. But in order to do that ya need to shut yer body up. Ya need ta find a place where you can tink an' analyze yer sitsooation wid aht (A.N. out) yer body gettin' in da way. Can ya tink of a place dat ya can do dat?**
** Well... there's always the danger room. But I doubt I'd be able to think about or
"analyze" anything without getting "killed."**
** But, child, dat's perfect. We can get in some trainin' tahme for ya ta use mah powers as well as ya trainin' ta control yer own. And ya will be so tahred that ya will just fall back inta bed and yer body won't be ahble ta do nuttin' 'bout it. Then ya can look at the "Logan thing" in a new lahght an' decide what all ya gonna do.**
** You sure? I mean, it's not like a good danger room session won't tire me out. But what if some one tries to come into the session? How do I explain the fact that at,** Marie glances briefly at the clock on her bedside table, ** 11:50 at night I'm in the danger room pounding up holographic foes?**
** Oh, ya poor ting. Yer best friend has jus' left dis world an' ya are confused an' angry. Ya need somewheres ta vent yer "emotional frustrations,"** Alana thought smugly.
** Okay. I get it,** thought Marie exasperatedly, ** Since people think your dead they won't mess with me, for a while at least.**
** Ah promise dat if'n anyone sees ya dey won't tink nuttin' of it.**
** Alright, just let me get dressed.**
While Rogue was putting back on her school uniform (she'd gotten into her pjs and was laying in bed during this mental conversation) Kitty walked in and gave her a "look." She didn't ask what Rogue was doing. She just went about her business of getting ready for bed.
When Rogue had finished getting dressed she turned to the now pj clad Kitty and explained to her, "I'll be in the danger room if anyone comes looking for me, OK?"
"Sure thing Rogue." Rogue started for their door walking straight and confident, and hoping to hell that no one stopped her on her way to the danger room. "Oh, and Rogue?"
"Yes Kitty?" Rogue answered only slightly annoyed at being interrupted from her mind-set of "no one's going to stop me."
"Well, um like," stumbled the valley-girl, "if you like ever need to, um, talk, I'm like here you know?"
A slight smile touched the corners of Rogue's mouth as she responded, "I know Kitty, I know." With that Rogue turned and left the room. Lady Luck must of been on Rogue's side that night, as not one person so much as passed her in the halls on her way to the danger room.
** Alright, D.R., I'm here now what?**
Two long hours later Marie could be seen trying to drag herself back to her bed from the danger room.
** Oh, God. Not even Logan pushes us that hard.**
** Yes, well dat's because Ah know all o' yer weaknesses. An' Ah know just 'ow ta help ya make dose weaknesses inta strengths,** thought Alana.
** I don't understand, D.R., I thought you were going to help me learn to control my powers. We barely worked on that part,** there was just a hint of a whine when Marie thought this.
** Ah know. Allow meh ta explain. Ya must first have enough mental discipline ta be ahble ta handle yerself properly when yer not trying ta use yer powers. Uh-Uh-Uh,** mentally tutted Alana, when she felt Marie try to deny that fact. ** My dearest, you have to face the facts. Not only, are you a teenager you're also a mutant. Neither of these helps you to deal with normal, everyday emotional troubles. It's cahmpletely normal ta not be totally in control of yerself. But, if'n ya wanna be ahble to control yer powers by yerself ya first need to be in control of yerself. Yer prahblem, hawevah (A.N. however) is dat ya don't know who you are,** Alana made sure to pronounce those last important words with as little of her accent getting in the way as possible.
**Ya know child sometahmes it's best ta separate da Rogue from de Marie. Trah ta get sum sleep, child. Ya gonna have a hard tahme now dat Ah'm gonna be trainin' ya.**
Rogue however couldn't get to sleep easy. It was a little after two in the morning and she was drained, but she couldn't get D.R.'s words out of her head. She kept thinking that she'd been Rogue all her life, even before her powers were realized. Rogue wondered what it would be like to be Marie and only Marie. She wondered if she could draw an imaginary line between two different personalities. Rogue contemplated whether or not other heroes did that, split their personalities. If she could do that what would Marie turn out to be like?