In Which Haldir Finds Pain To Be His Friend
Chapter Two
Eternal Night of Hell Two
So there I am, minding my own business, setting fire to helpless squirrels, and Rumil attacks me! He called me cruel and sick. How is this possible? I thought he was supposed to be all loving-like.
I must be getting the short end of this stick.
Even Orophin's been looking at me strangely, although that may be because he's even deeper in love with me than usual. Not that I really blame him.
But that damned Rumil! Just when I was going to eat the thing, too.
Maybe I should eat him.
Hee.
Eternal Night of Hell Three
We've been at the entrance of Moria for a day and a half now, making many excuses why we can't go in quite yet. Like the fact it was snowing. Up the mountain quite a ways, but it was snowing.
I think my brothers may fear for their lives. But it's just a large, God-like beast of darkness and fire. Nothing to fear.
Which is why I can't go in quite yet.
My boots need polish.
Eternal Night of Hell Four
Hopefully I will remember to kill Elrond because of his children. See, I can't exactly kill them. Their utter stupidity is like an invincible shield about them, protecting them from fire, daggers, and hastily swung halberds. So if I kill the source of the problem, maybe both of them will perish.
So, yes. We met those two earlier today, and discovered that they were there for the same reason we are: patrol and kill things that live.
I wish they'd kill each other.
Can you imagine that Elladan set fire to Rumil? What a terrible thing to do.
Eternal Night of Hell Five
I think everyone is plotting something against me, as they huddle in dark corners and whisper. Moria is rather lightless, so they tend to do this much of the time. In retaliation, I stabbed Elrohir. He didn't think it was very amusing.
I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to use that leg again. I really like my hamstrings inside of me.
Eternal Night of Hell Six
I've been rolling around bleeding a bit for a while now, quite alone. Elvish healing abilities really aren't what they used to be.
I'm still alive, so that's something.
Now, if only the pounding drums shaking the stone from afar would stop. Really, a man needs healing time.
Or rolling around and moaning time.
At any rate, the clash of steel is getting closer. And the drums.
The bloody drums. What is this? A bloody festival devoted solely to pounding hard objects in damp holes in the earth?
Eternal Night of Hell Seven
Those traitorous gits came crashing into my Agony Hole and slammed and barred the doors. They then proceeded to slide down the doors and begin dribbling blood on the ground. They didn't seem to be able to talk, so I set fire to Rumil to check for signs of life. It's a ritual in Lorien.
He's still got some sort of pulse. He did sort of flail and scream a bit.
He's not moving anymore.
And Elrohir is giving me that evil stare again.
So here I am, still in pain, barred in a room with these idiots for Eru knows how long and against some foe I'm sure could kill us with a thought, so WHY THE HELL ARE WE STILL HERE?
Why are we here and not running for our lives?
I need to burn more things.
Urges to kill are being smothered under younger twin's wicked glare. Hm. I might be getting a little turned on by this.
I suspect older twin would do more than hamstring me if I were to even think that about his brother.
Well, too late.
Wow. Is that even possible?
Night of Eternal Hell Eight
Reduced to playing Hanged Dwarf on the floor. Drums still haven't ceased and there seem to be legions of Orcs swarming right outside the door. They haven't gotten in yet.
I like that.
Elrohir stabbed me a few times today on account of 'slipping' while 'taking inventory' on his 'weapons'.
That wasn't a bloody knife, that was a Dragon tooth.
The agony. I'll never be able to get out of here at this rate. What the hell is his problem? Just because I stabbed him and set his brother on fire..
And what is his obsession with my thighs, anyway? Not that it'll matter soon, since he's just going to leave me here to bleed to death, anyway.
I wonder if the Orcs would mind if I burned them?