Disclaimer: Bye bye.meet me on the chapter one.
A/N: Sadly I admit that I get only one review on this fic. Thanks to
Hasuko, who still review for me. Who cares!! Please read below, please,
please!
I just told by my sis that she found someone that wrote a review to
other author cruelly. The reviewer says that the idea of story is bad
and the writer has no ability. And that dishearten the author to
continue his/her story. I hate to be reviewed like that. If you don't
like the story just don't review. With the number amount of review that
I get, I would know whether you like the story or not. But even someone
hate my fics, I will keep it to the end for my own sake! Yay! But still
a flame about my bad grammar is accepted. If you have time, please give
me the correction.
Now shouldn't mop around! Let's start the fic ^_^
// bla bla bla // means speak silently
(bla bla bla ) means author's note.
By Irisgem
The last snow had fallen. I watched them in amused through the misty window. As the tons of snowflakes fell from the gray dark sky, I remembered the ordeal of my childhood. Those worse days were the time when I mostly cursed my birth. The memories of rejection played like an endless string.
My fiery eyes followed the moves of frozen snowflakes. It fell aimlessly, yet beautiful. Its pure innocence color made me felt in stained. It revealed the pure truth of heart while I was making sin. I usually spent my time on hating this cold dying season on the branch of pine tree of Makai. The cool that made me shivered through my veins reminds me of Ice Land.
When I closed my eyes, the tears that fell to countless clear blue gems, snowstorm, the high ravine, Koorimes, white ground, especially the cold dying stream, those image made me felt betrayed. I lost my faith long enough to return and step on the ground of belief. It sounded impossible for me to care. Though I was a fire demon, my heart was made by ice of hatred and betrayal. He said that he could see the icy snow within my ruby eyes once, but there was no longer.
I stopped disliking myself. I started to feel warm. I was no longer in the middle of confusion. I was myself, a complete fire demon. I changed because of him. I didn't dare to believe in love. I was forsaken by my own bloodline, how could other people love me? I closed any possible entry door to my shattered mirror of pain heart.
So I became that impassive while every person was chatted in happiness. If I didn't talk, or relate directly with someone, then no one would hurt my feeling. But then no one put a glance on me, besides revenge or grudge on me. I couldn't love myself, thus the other people did the same. But not for him.
I didn't know what he saw any special things in me. He only would say, ' You don't need a reason, my most beautiful creature. If I should make the list of your special features, then it would be as long as the river. ' I blinked with his words and he would look amused. Then I glared. He played one of his hoaxes again.
I didn't know whether to believe or not. He was kind as one of his human nature, but half part of him was a cruel, famous beauty thief of Makai, Youko Kurama. What would happen if sometime he returned to his old self? For loving a Youko, there was a great risk of your fate.
He said that love the only way to make you felt complete. He said it was the sincere blessing for God's creation. But then, when you felt in complete and you were betrayed, it meant you also cursed entirely.
Your heart was too full that if it shattered, the whole of it would be in despair. You would experience the unbearable melancholy, more than the hollow heart would felt. The wound would remain forever, no matter how long time had passed by. As your heart filled, the scar would be deeper.
And for believing the nature of half fox, I couldn't vow anything. I just wanted to believe, that was all I needed to do for now. He understood that I couldn't change within five years of joy. I was too groundless in belief that I learned as a cursed demon.
I was no longer in the utter dark. I was still within the silhouette, trying to reach the color of pure snow, like my dear sibling sister. I met her last time two weeks ago on a reunion of Reikai Tantei.
Watching the white paint reminded me of Shiori's face, that fox's mother. She grew paler and weaker as time elapsed bitterly. She said that she was fine with something unrevealed behind her. We both knew her lie. Her pale face as white as the moon became the proof of her illness.
" Hiei."
I turned my back and put my hand down that I used to support my head. I faced the sweet voice's owner. His delicate face was messed with confusion and emotion. Suddenly he squatted and burst into tears. I knew that he had bottled some grief within him for century for me. But what made him, the Greatest Formidable Thief, Youko Kurama to cry openly?
I bowed a little and placed my hand on his shoulder. " What's wrong? " I tried to hide my concern tune, but still it could be able to hear.
He seemed in quail to talk. So I guessed. " Is your mother alright? " He just went to hospital to check on her. He looked at me long enough as if we would not meet again. With a blink, he gripped my hand hardly. I was too frantic to see him like this, I moved backward for single step.
" Listen." I didn't know why, his eyes were eerie. I wanted to run but he clutched me too tight. It would be a bad news. He didn't look at my eyes. He left me nothing to see, except for the ruby long hair.
" This can't go anymore. "
" I just realized that." His voice was strained with doubt in it.
" I.We must over this affinity between us. "
I stunned.
I struck as if I was hit by seven worlds of Hell. I couldn't believe my ears. I hid my winced face by lowering my face. I couldn't resist the eyes of him.
I knew that someday this would happen. Did I believe his words? Of course I didn't or did I? Just when I learned to believe, someone had betrayed me again.
Again. And he was the one, who violated to me. With his sweet delicate words, he captured my feeling. When he was finished with me, he dumped me over like meaningless dust.
Why did I care? It was the fate of Forbidden Child. The one, who was wrong, was myself. If I weren't given birth as a half-breed between Ice and Fire Demon, I wouldn't fell in this disgusting joke. I might never fall in love to him. I.but still it was fate that put me on this position. Why me.?
// If my dear sister is the one who is in my place, what will I do?//
// Probably, I will try to alter the position with her. I don't want to watch her suffer. She isn't that strong, so.//
// So a reason for me for being the one who carried this sin.because I would be strong enough to endure with a limit heart and pity. Then. //
I was tired of this silence echo. If he put all of this to end, so be it. I was the dust, which flew aimlessly. No matter someone kicked or stepped on me, I would be resurrected again with my own power.
I lifted my jaded head and smiled sadly. My last smile for him and was for him only. Wasn't it precious enough to be my keepsake for him? I held my tear back before it fell like a stream on my cheek. He looked confused as I almost never smiled, especially in time like this.
" I should never believe. You become the one who lie to me. Yesterday you said to me about something with pure love on this Valentine day. Now you are saying this is the time for us for being apart. "
" Hiei, I'm serious. "
" Who said you are joking?! " My temper was raised with frustration. I had to go from this place, but I should make anything to be obvious. My eyes were flared that soon died by the cold snow winter that hit me. I was going to be in the eternal winter of my own thought when the ephemeral winter of reality was soon over.
" I become a burden in your next love affair. There is nothing between us now. Isn't this what you have wished? " I laughed with a mock tune in it.
" No, we still can be friends, Hi."
" You're being arrogant. " I would not let him finished that sentences for my whole life. " You are the one who put this to the corner, why should I follow you all the time, PAL?! " I stressed the last word and my tear would soon flow.
" I didn't mean to be arrogant, I just."
" Choose, Kurama. And never mourned for your path. You have chosen someone besides me then I should leave. You can't obsess two things in one time. Now I have the same feeling to 'that big oaf ' for you. There is nothing called friendship, besides for formality. Sayonara. "
I opened his window that covered by thick cool mist. Without turning back I leaped from the big white tree in front of his room to trees on the street. I could hear his loud voice, calling my name. But soon the fallen snow swallowed his vague word from far.
I almost slipped three times on wet branches.
I would never see him anymore.his fond embrace.nor his happy smile. His simple joke was no longer amused, they all felt bitter. He was now out of my life and vice versa.
// But why my chest still remained hurt mercilessly? //
I went out to the outskirt of human town. I felt weak as I held the tree to support my body. I was too depressed and this abominable weather made everything so complicated for me. I took a long breath to take the tranquility of cold wind to my empty lungs.
Standing there for hours in solitude without anything or people was quite helpful. No voice, no face, no feeling, no that baka fox, nothing besides me.
// This kind of place was the real realm for Forbidden Child. A menacing serenity but still peace was the only place to rest. Without no one.//
Without someone watched over me, the tears that I held with pain in my eyes soon were frozen and twinkled. A raven color pearl dripped and looked compared on the pure white clean ground. Then another pearls were formed endlessly.
My long black hair that met my waist entangled in front of my moist face. I lifted my heavy head to return the drop of salty water to deep in my eyes, but I couldn't hold it still. With fallen snowflakes and emerald forest as the only witness, I dried my tears until there were no more.
// I would never shed this shameful yet pretty gem anymore. //
The vow that only myself who knew it, was echoed on my head. The white snow fell on my head and cooled my mind. Though I was half of Koorime, I still couldn't endure the chill. My ki that once flared soon died out to warm my freezing body.
This coldness.empty solitary.made me thought of someone that was dear to me. If I should no longer watch over that silver fox then he made me easier to protect Yukina. I wended on the freezing wind when no one would like to walk on this foul weather. It that city, there was no one on the streets.
My eyes were getting heavier and my head started to spin. I crossed one of my arms in front of my chest and held the other resting arm tightly to support my small body. I didn't care to die. So I closed my restless eyes and just let the darkness reigned over me, but still I could hear a sweet girl voice, as sweet as morning chirping birds. It was like Yukina's.
Maybe it was just my imagination as the voice went out to the vague one.
~~~~~~~~~
A bit too long for a brief idea, isn't it? Is it boring? Please tell me, so I might be able change my way to make story better. Should I explain briefly or with the complicated one? Hehe.I'm sorry for not writing a really good story. Please Review!
Next Chapter: Kurama's reason and his POV!
A/N: Sadly I admit that I get only one review on this fic. Thanks to
Hasuko, who still review for me. Who cares!! Please read below, please,
please!
I just told by my sis that she found someone that wrote a review to
other author cruelly. The reviewer says that the idea of story is bad
and the writer has no ability. And that dishearten the author to
continue his/her story. I hate to be reviewed like that. If you don't
like the story just don't review. With the number amount of review that
I get, I would know whether you like the story or not. But even someone
hate my fics, I will keep it to the end for my own sake! Yay! But still
a flame about my bad grammar is accepted. If you have time, please give
me the correction.
Now shouldn't mop around! Let's start the fic ^_^
// bla bla bla // means speak silently
(bla bla bla ) means author's note.
By Irisgem
The last snow had fallen. I watched them in amused through the misty window. As the tons of snowflakes fell from the gray dark sky, I remembered the ordeal of my childhood. Those worse days were the time when I mostly cursed my birth. The memories of rejection played like an endless string.
My fiery eyes followed the moves of frozen snowflakes. It fell aimlessly, yet beautiful. Its pure innocence color made me felt in stained. It revealed the pure truth of heart while I was making sin. I usually spent my time on hating this cold dying season on the branch of pine tree of Makai. The cool that made me shivered through my veins reminds me of Ice Land.
When I closed my eyes, the tears that fell to countless clear blue gems, snowstorm, the high ravine, Koorimes, white ground, especially the cold dying stream, those image made me felt betrayed. I lost my faith long enough to return and step on the ground of belief. It sounded impossible for me to care. Though I was a fire demon, my heart was made by ice of hatred and betrayal. He said that he could see the icy snow within my ruby eyes once, but there was no longer.
I stopped disliking myself. I started to feel warm. I was no longer in the middle of confusion. I was myself, a complete fire demon. I changed because of him. I didn't dare to believe in love. I was forsaken by my own bloodline, how could other people love me? I closed any possible entry door to my shattered mirror of pain heart.
So I became that impassive while every person was chatted in happiness. If I didn't talk, or relate directly with someone, then no one would hurt my feeling. But then no one put a glance on me, besides revenge or grudge on me. I couldn't love myself, thus the other people did the same. But not for him.
I didn't know what he saw any special things in me. He only would say, ' You don't need a reason, my most beautiful creature. If I should make the list of your special features, then it would be as long as the river. ' I blinked with his words and he would look amused. Then I glared. He played one of his hoaxes again.
I didn't know whether to believe or not. He was kind as one of his human nature, but half part of him was a cruel, famous beauty thief of Makai, Youko Kurama. What would happen if sometime he returned to his old self? For loving a Youko, there was a great risk of your fate.
He said that love the only way to make you felt complete. He said it was the sincere blessing for God's creation. But then, when you felt in complete and you were betrayed, it meant you also cursed entirely.
Your heart was too full that if it shattered, the whole of it would be in despair. You would experience the unbearable melancholy, more than the hollow heart would felt. The wound would remain forever, no matter how long time had passed by. As your heart filled, the scar would be deeper.
And for believing the nature of half fox, I couldn't vow anything. I just wanted to believe, that was all I needed to do for now. He understood that I couldn't change within five years of joy. I was too groundless in belief that I learned as a cursed demon.
I was no longer in the utter dark. I was still within the silhouette, trying to reach the color of pure snow, like my dear sibling sister. I met her last time two weeks ago on a reunion of Reikai Tantei.
Watching the white paint reminded me of Shiori's face, that fox's mother. She grew paler and weaker as time elapsed bitterly. She said that she was fine with something unrevealed behind her. We both knew her lie. Her pale face as white as the moon became the proof of her illness.
" Hiei."
I turned my back and put my hand down that I used to support my head. I faced the sweet voice's owner. His delicate face was messed with confusion and emotion. Suddenly he squatted and burst into tears. I knew that he had bottled some grief within him for century for me. But what made him, the Greatest Formidable Thief, Youko Kurama to cry openly?
I bowed a little and placed my hand on his shoulder. " What's wrong? " I tried to hide my concern tune, but still it could be able to hear.
He seemed in quail to talk. So I guessed. " Is your mother alright? " He just went to hospital to check on her. He looked at me long enough as if we would not meet again. With a blink, he gripped my hand hardly. I was too frantic to see him like this, I moved backward for single step.
" Listen." I didn't know why, his eyes were eerie. I wanted to run but he clutched me too tight. It would be a bad news. He didn't look at my eyes. He left me nothing to see, except for the ruby long hair.
" This can't go anymore. "
" I just realized that." His voice was strained with doubt in it.
" I.We must over this affinity between us. "
I stunned.
I struck as if I was hit by seven worlds of Hell. I couldn't believe my ears. I hid my winced face by lowering my face. I couldn't resist the eyes of him.
I knew that someday this would happen. Did I believe his words? Of course I didn't or did I? Just when I learned to believe, someone had betrayed me again.
Again. And he was the one, who violated to me. With his sweet delicate words, he captured my feeling. When he was finished with me, he dumped me over like meaningless dust.
Why did I care? It was the fate of Forbidden Child. The one, who was wrong, was myself. If I weren't given birth as a half-breed between Ice and Fire Demon, I wouldn't fell in this disgusting joke. I might never fall in love to him. I.but still it was fate that put me on this position. Why me.?
// If my dear sister is the one who is in my place, what will I do?//
// Probably, I will try to alter the position with her. I don't want to watch her suffer. She isn't that strong, so.//
// So a reason for me for being the one who carried this sin.because I would be strong enough to endure with a limit heart and pity. Then. //
I was tired of this silence echo. If he put all of this to end, so be it. I was the dust, which flew aimlessly. No matter someone kicked or stepped on me, I would be resurrected again with my own power.
I lifted my jaded head and smiled sadly. My last smile for him and was for him only. Wasn't it precious enough to be my keepsake for him? I held my tear back before it fell like a stream on my cheek. He looked confused as I almost never smiled, especially in time like this.
" I should never believe. You become the one who lie to me. Yesterday you said to me about something with pure love on this Valentine day. Now you are saying this is the time for us for being apart. "
" Hiei, I'm serious. "
" Who said you are joking?! " My temper was raised with frustration. I had to go from this place, but I should make anything to be obvious. My eyes were flared that soon died by the cold snow winter that hit me. I was going to be in the eternal winter of my own thought when the ephemeral winter of reality was soon over.
" I become a burden in your next love affair. There is nothing between us now. Isn't this what you have wished? " I laughed with a mock tune in it.
" No, we still can be friends, Hi."
" You're being arrogant. " I would not let him finished that sentences for my whole life. " You are the one who put this to the corner, why should I follow you all the time, PAL?! " I stressed the last word and my tear would soon flow.
" I didn't mean to be arrogant, I just."
" Choose, Kurama. And never mourned for your path. You have chosen someone besides me then I should leave. You can't obsess two things in one time. Now I have the same feeling to 'that big oaf ' for you. There is nothing called friendship, besides for formality. Sayonara. "
I opened his window that covered by thick cool mist. Without turning back I leaped from the big white tree in front of his room to trees on the street. I could hear his loud voice, calling my name. But soon the fallen snow swallowed his vague word from far.
I almost slipped three times on wet branches.
I would never see him anymore.his fond embrace.nor his happy smile. His simple joke was no longer amused, they all felt bitter. He was now out of my life and vice versa.
// But why my chest still remained hurt mercilessly? //
I went out to the outskirt of human town. I felt weak as I held the tree to support my body. I was too depressed and this abominable weather made everything so complicated for me. I took a long breath to take the tranquility of cold wind to my empty lungs.
Standing there for hours in solitude without anything or people was quite helpful. No voice, no face, no feeling, no that baka fox, nothing besides me.
// This kind of place was the real realm for Forbidden Child. A menacing serenity but still peace was the only place to rest. Without no one.//
Without someone watched over me, the tears that I held with pain in my eyes soon were frozen and twinkled. A raven color pearl dripped and looked compared on the pure white clean ground. Then another pearls were formed endlessly.
My long black hair that met my waist entangled in front of my moist face. I lifted my heavy head to return the drop of salty water to deep in my eyes, but I couldn't hold it still. With fallen snowflakes and emerald forest as the only witness, I dried my tears until there were no more.
// I would never shed this shameful yet pretty gem anymore. //
The vow that only myself who knew it, was echoed on my head. The white snow fell on my head and cooled my mind. Though I was half of Koorime, I still couldn't endure the chill. My ki that once flared soon died out to warm my freezing body.
This coldness.empty solitary.made me thought of someone that was dear to me. If I should no longer watch over that silver fox then he made me easier to protect Yukina. I wended on the freezing wind when no one would like to walk on this foul weather. It that city, there was no one on the streets.
My eyes were getting heavier and my head started to spin. I crossed one of my arms in front of my chest and held the other resting arm tightly to support my small body. I didn't care to die. So I closed my restless eyes and just let the darkness reigned over me, but still I could hear a sweet girl voice, as sweet as morning chirping birds. It was like Yukina's.
Maybe it was just my imagination as the voice went out to the vague one.
~~~~~~~~~
A bit too long for a brief idea, isn't it? Is it boring? Please tell me, so I might be able change my way to make story better. Should I explain briefly or with the complicated one? Hehe.I'm sorry for not writing a really good story. Please Review!
Next Chapter: Kurama's reason and his POV!