I am so sorry that this chapter took so long to come out. School ended
yesterday for me and I had been busy studying for finals. Yeah, I know,
lame excuses. ( This is the next chapter. Hope you guys enjoy it.
PinkyToes
*************************************
The Deception of the Heart By PinkyToes
Chapter 2
"He loved you, you know."
"No, Raye. He didn't."
Serena's voice came out as a whisper, but her words impacted everyone around her. Shakily, Serena's hands reached for the glass of water before her. Yesterday, everything changed for her, as she knew it would. Darien had come over to her apartment and shaken the stability of her life, of her hope, her beliefs, her strength. She hadn't cried, she hadn't begged, she hadn't looked at him in the eyes throughout their conversation no matter how many times he had asked her to. And when he asked her if friendship would be enough for the both of them, she had lied to him in the face and replied 'yes'. No matter. She doesn't plan to continue hurting. She doesn't plan to stay long enough to watch him be happy with his newfound soul mate.
"Serena. He never loved you in the way you wanted him to. But, he loved you, as a close friend."
"Maybe, Raye. I guess we would never know now, would we?"
"Serena. Are you sure? He's not worth it. He may be my brother, but he's not worth it. Don't do this to everything you've worked so hard to build."
"That's just the problem, Amy. He is worth it. He is perfect, and I have always been that imperfect half that pulled him away from the life he could have had a lot sooner if he had never met me. It's not fair to him."
"Serena. I can't stand by and let you do this to yourself. You can't."
Inwardly, Serena laughed. She laughed at her friends' lack of understanding for her situation. She laughed at the hypocrisy she has planned for herself. She laughed in bitterness at the cards life dealt her. She laughed at the irony that she, who had always been the strongest believer in love, would be hurt in a way most people in the world have had the luck to evade. She laughed, mostly, at herself, her stupidity and naivety. All that will change. She will learn. She pushed her chair back and stood up.
"Quite frankly, none of you have the power over what I can or cannot do. I finally have the chance to step out of the bubble I've encased myself in for the past three years and now, you guys want to stop me? Darien hurt me! He tore my heart out and stepped over it without an inkling of what he had done. Dammit, he..he h-hurt m-me.."
The rest of the group looked on in shock and resignation as tears spilled out of Serena's blue eyes and down her cheeks. Guilt floated like a stormy cloud in everyone's heart at what they had done. It was their fault to force this relationship over two of their closest friends and finally, after three long years, someone has gotten hurt. Amy's blue eyes looked beyond Serena's sobbing form and widened in shock when she registered who else had heard Serena's sad words. Darien stood a few feet from the group's table, facing Serena's back, fists clenched and eyes holding an unreadable emotion.
"Darien.."
Serena's body stilled and closed her eyes tightly, hoping that the one person whom she cannot, would not, see right now is not here in this restaurant, hearing her pitiful speech. Taking a deep breath and lifting her hands to wipe away her tears, she opened her eyes and locked them with Raye's. Raye nodded understandingly and rose from her chair. She walked to Darien and gently led him out of the restaurant. At first, Darien's tall form stood rigid and unmoving to Raye's pushing hands. Then, he shook himself out of his stupor and looked pleadingly into Raye's eyes before pushing her hands away and walking toward the table.
"Serena, he is coming."
"I know. I'm leaving. Tell him sorry for me."
Putting on her coat and lifting both her purse and suitcase, Serena walked head down toward the restaurant's exit.
"Serena!"
Her feet stopped moving at his beautiful voice. She wanted to cry right then when she heard him say her name. The way he said her name almost made her believe he needed her. But she knows he doesn't. He only wanted friendship with her and though it may be selfish, she doesn't want only friendship. She never did.
Serena turned her head and met his eyes. His eyes asked her to stay, but she knows she can't. She won't.
"Goodbye. I love you."
***************************************
"Damn you all. Damn you all to the deepest level of hell."
"You better watch what you're saying, Darien, because from what we have seen and heard, YOU are the one who hurt her, not us."
He knew they were right. It wasn't their fault she's now gone. It is completely his fault. He should have realized how much she cared for him. He should have been more considerate. Dammit, he should have loved her.
"Darien. We all thought you two were perfect. We pushed you two together and we admit it is partly our fault that one of our best friends is gone. But, just answer us this. Why? Why have you never loved her? She may not be the most beautiful woman in this world, but I never thought you would be that blind or vain to see that she IS one of the most beautiful woman in the world, not because of her looks, but of her beautiful heart."
Amy's words cut his heart. He knew she was right. She had been beautiful, one of the kindest people he has ever known. She had always been there, night or day, to keep him company while he took advantage of her loyalty and drove her away with his stupidity. And god, he knows she's not gorgeous, but her soft combination of blonde hair and crystal blue eyes would bring anyone to jealousy. But, it's true, he never truly loved her. He felt trapped, and that is why the other night he walked so willingly into the arms of another woman.
"I..I didn't love her. I didn't know how. She had always been there..and I never thought that she would leave. It just..it didn't happen naturally! I didn't meet her one day and fall madly in love with her! You pushed us together! And..I couldn't' accept that..I couldn't be forced..god.."
"Well, Darien. You got what you wanted. You wanted out of this relationship and after three years of playing with her heart, you got what you wanted. And Serena. She left. She left us all, with a broken heart, something that she never asked for nor wanted. I would say that the balance is tipped in your favor."
"NEVER did I want her to leave. NEVER. Don't ever assume that I'm cold blooded like that. Don't."
"But, aren't you? You toyed with her feelings, her emotions for THREE years. If you had wanted out, which you did, you should have just told her! But noooooo, Darien the almighty wanted to play with his woman a little longer, to test the quality of the product and see just how fragile or strong Serena is. When he finds that he can't get rid of her, he does the next best thing! Sleeps with another woman and break up with the one true thing that is good in his life. Bravo, Darien. Of course you're not cold blooded. You're a freaking damn ice cube. Have a nice life with your mistress."
With that, Raye walked away and out of the restaurant. Lita and Mina, who have been silent throughout the entire conversation stood up as well and left, but not before sending a cold glare in Darien's direction. Amy stood beside him uncertainly and battled between staying with her brother and following her friends.
"If you wish to prove a point as well, you might as well follow your friends."
Amy jumped out of her thoughts at Darien's words. Her blue eyes turned toward her brother's crestfallen face and grieved inwardly at the outcome of things. Hesitantly, she lifted her hand and gently set it on Darien's rigid form.
"Darien. You've made the choice of letting Serena go. She..she may never come back. I can't say that I agree with your decision, but I'll always be here. But for now, you need to understand the reason for your decision. Alone. I'll call you."
Picking up her purse, Amy gave one last worried glance before turning and exiting the restaurant. Outside, Mina, Lita, and Raye waited patiently and the four walked away.
He can't explain his feelings. All he knows is confusion and pain. Today, he lost not just one best friend, but five. The girls he grew up no longer trust him, and for that he felt pity for himself. Serena. She has finally had enough. Raye was right. He toyed with Serena's feelings. He was a man and wouldn't let himself be forced into a relationship. Because of that, he had always held back, never fully giving himself to the one thing that he now realize was his light. But, the past is the past. Now is the present and the future is waiting to be developed. There is only one person in this world right now who would understand him, support him.
"Beryl."
PinkyToes
*************************************
The Deception of the Heart By PinkyToes
Chapter 2
"He loved you, you know."
"No, Raye. He didn't."
Serena's voice came out as a whisper, but her words impacted everyone around her. Shakily, Serena's hands reached for the glass of water before her. Yesterday, everything changed for her, as she knew it would. Darien had come over to her apartment and shaken the stability of her life, of her hope, her beliefs, her strength. She hadn't cried, she hadn't begged, she hadn't looked at him in the eyes throughout their conversation no matter how many times he had asked her to. And when he asked her if friendship would be enough for the both of them, she had lied to him in the face and replied 'yes'. No matter. She doesn't plan to continue hurting. She doesn't plan to stay long enough to watch him be happy with his newfound soul mate.
"Serena. He never loved you in the way you wanted him to. But, he loved you, as a close friend."
"Maybe, Raye. I guess we would never know now, would we?"
"Serena. Are you sure? He's not worth it. He may be my brother, but he's not worth it. Don't do this to everything you've worked so hard to build."
"That's just the problem, Amy. He is worth it. He is perfect, and I have always been that imperfect half that pulled him away from the life he could have had a lot sooner if he had never met me. It's not fair to him."
"Serena. I can't stand by and let you do this to yourself. You can't."
Inwardly, Serena laughed. She laughed at her friends' lack of understanding for her situation. She laughed at the hypocrisy she has planned for herself. She laughed in bitterness at the cards life dealt her. She laughed at the irony that she, who had always been the strongest believer in love, would be hurt in a way most people in the world have had the luck to evade. She laughed, mostly, at herself, her stupidity and naivety. All that will change. She will learn. She pushed her chair back and stood up.
"Quite frankly, none of you have the power over what I can or cannot do. I finally have the chance to step out of the bubble I've encased myself in for the past three years and now, you guys want to stop me? Darien hurt me! He tore my heart out and stepped over it without an inkling of what he had done. Dammit, he..he h-hurt m-me.."
The rest of the group looked on in shock and resignation as tears spilled out of Serena's blue eyes and down her cheeks. Guilt floated like a stormy cloud in everyone's heart at what they had done. It was their fault to force this relationship over two of their closest friends and finally, after three long years, someone has gotten hurt. Amy's blue eyes looked beyond Serena's sobbing form and widened in shock when she registered who else had heard Serena's sad words. Darien stood a few feet from the group's table, facing Serena's back, fists clenched and eyes holding an unreadable emotion.
"Darien.."
Serena's body stilled and closed her eyes tightly, hoping that the one person whom she cannot, would not, see right now is not here in this restaurant, hearing her pitiful speech. Taking a deep breath and lifting her hands to wipe away her tears, she opened her eyes and locked them with Raye's. Raye nodded understandingly and rose from her chair. She walked to Darien and gently led him out of the restaurant. At first, Darien's tall form stood rigid and unmoving to Raye's pushing hands. Then, he shook himself out of his stupor and looked pleadingly into Raye's eyes before pushing her hands away and walking toward the table.
"Serena, he is coming."
"I know. I'm leaving. Tell him sorry for me."
Putting on her coat and lifting both her purse and suitcase, Serena walked head down toward the restaurant's exit.
"Serena!"
Her feet stopped moving at his beautiful voice. She wanted to cry right then when she heard him say her name. The way he said her name almost made her believe he needed her. But she knows he doesn't. He only wanted friendship with her and though it may be selfish, she doesn't want only friendship. She never did.
Serena turned her head and met his eyes. His eyes asked her to stay, but she knows she can't. She won't.
"Goodbye. I love you."
***************************************
"Damn you all. Damn you all to the deepest level of hell."
"You better watch what you're saying, Darien, because from what we have seen and heard, YOU are the one who hurt her, not us."
He knew they were right. It wasn't their fault she's now gone. It is completely his fault. He should have realized how much she cared for him. He should have been more considerate. Dammit, he should have loved her.
"Darien. We all thought you two were perfect. We pushed you two together and we admit it is partly our fault that one of our best friends is gone. But, just answer us this. Why? Why have you never loved her? She may not be the most beautiful woman in this world, but I never thought you would be that blind or vain to see that she IS one of the most beautiful woman in the world, not because of her looks, but of her beautiful heart."
Amy's words cut his heart. He knew she was right. She had been beautiful, one of the kindest people he has ever known. She had always been there, night or day, to keep him company while he took advantage of her loyalty and drove her away with his stupidity. And god, he knows she's not gorgeous, but her soft combination of blonde hair and crystal blue eyes would bring anyone to jealousy. But, it's true, he never truly loved her. He felt trapped, and that is why the other night he walked so willingly into the arms of another woman.
"I..I didn't love her. I didn't know how. She had always been there..and I never thought that she would leave. It just..it didn't happen naturally! I didn't meet her one day and fall madly in love with her! You pushed us together! And..I couldn't' accept that..I couldn't be forced..god.."
"Well, Darien. You got what you wanted. You wanted out of this relationship and after three years of playing with her heart, you got what you wanted. And Serena. She left. She left us all, with a broken heart, something that she never asked for nor wanted. I would say that the balance is tipped in your favor."
"NEVER did I want her to leave. NEVER. Don't ever assume that I'm cold blooded like that. Don't."
"But, aren't you? You toyed with her feelings, her emotions for THREE years. If you had wanted out, which you did, you should have just told her! But noooooo, Darien the almighty wanted to play with his woman a little longer, to test the quality of the product and see just how fragile or strong Serena is. When he finds that he can't get rid of her, he does the next best thing! Sleeps with another woman and break up with the one true thing that is good in his life. Bravo, Darien. Of course you're not cold blooded. You're a freaking damn ice cube. Have a nice life with your mistress."
With that, Raye walked away and out of the restaurant. Lita and Mina, who have been silent throughout the entire conversation stood up as well and left, but not before sending a cold glare in Darien's direction. Amy stood beside him uncertainly and battled between staying with her brother and following her friends.
"If you wish to prove a point as well, you might as well follow your friends."
Amy jumped out of her thoughts at Darien's words. Her blue eyes turned toward her brother's crestfallen face and grieved inwardly at the outcome of things. Hesitantly, she lifted her hand and gently set it on Darien's rigid form.
"Darien. You've made the choice of letting Serena go. She..she may never come back. I can't say that I agree with your decision, but I'll always be here. But for now, you need to understand the reason for your decision. Alone. I'll call you."
Picking up her purse, Amy gave one last worried glance before turning and exiting the restaurant. Outside, Mina, Lita, and Raye waited patiently and the four walked away.
He can't explain his feelings. All he knows is confusion and pain. Today, he lost not just one best friend, but five. The girls he grew up no longer trust him, and for that he felt pity for himself. Serena. She has finally had enough. Raye was right. He toyed with Serena's feelings. He was a man and wouldn't let himself be forced into a relationship. Because of that, he had always held back, never fully giving himself to the one thing that he now realize was his light. But, the past is the past. Now is the present and the future is waiting to be developed. There is only one person in this world right now who would understand him, support him.
"Beryl."