February 28, 2002
By Yashira
Dear…
OUR POOR VILLAGE!
Every time we get ahead and get food stored, our homes have their supply of wood, our goods ready to be traded and our houses built… some foul mouth youkai comes along and sets fires and destroys our village. We try to make ends meet, but it's getting harder and harder… we tried setting traps, enlisting mikos help, and all other things, but the problem still persists. WHAT ARE WE DOING WRONG?!
~Signed the Villagers of Musashi
OKAY:
This is getting stupid! Now that I can finally write my own letters again, THIS is WHAT I have to reply to?! Look, just because I destroyed your village once… ONCE!! Doesn't mean I do it repeatedly. Sure I have a habit of getting really violent, but that doesn't mean anything!!! If you got a problem, take it up with Naraku! NOT ME! And I don't have a foul mouth, you fucking bastards!!
~A Pissed off Inuyasha
P.S. I still never found out what the hell Kikyo was doing writing from Naraku's last time?
Hmm..
Take it up with me? Next pathetic fool to open his mouth gets to become meat for my next youkai.
~Naraku
P.S. Any takers? I need the spare body parts.
P.S.S. Oooh jealous Inuyasha? Do you really want to know what we did? Kukuku.
YO NARAKU!
TELL ME, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!
~Inuyasha
To Inuyasha:
^______________________^
~Naraku
To Naraku:
KAZE NO KIZU!!!!!!!!!!!!
~Inuyasha
HEY!!!
Okay, here's a word of warning, do you two want to leave the list for a short while? Your letters are preventing the others from writing! I know there was talk about Kikyo and Inuyasha both being off the list at the same time, but just imagine the chatter when its BOTH Inuyasha and Naraku, this time. :)
HEHE.
Also, I could almost tolerate it if you were fighting over Kagome, but you aren't, and did it just pass over your head, but she's not here and she's sick too? I'm not happy about it and neither are the Kagome sympathizers out there either. Although those who like Kikyo are probably delighted!
Are you two going to behave?
(Waits a bit for them to send her letters privately)
Hmm, I don't know if this was a good idea, I got anything but a yes. 3 swear letters, one recipe of Oden, 2 c/o packages with precious bean snacks, 5 indecent proposals… seems like Miroku pressed the send button one too many times.
Ooh, one of you asked if I'm really Inuyasha's full blooded sister (for that you need to read the "Sister, Sister" story, (but, hehe, as yet I haven't been able to transfer all my notes to the computer, not all the needed info is up, but that doesn't mean I'm not trying…). Ah, several more requests to write that Sango and Miroku fic. Good news Miroku, I have notes for such a fic… But this is besides the point, I'm still waiting for Inuyasha's and Naraku's answers.
~Yashira: List mommy
P.S. Good, they came in now although this looks... oddly like Miroku's writing. Oh well, now behave.
Dear Yashira:
I can't believe you just plugged your own story. Hmm, while you're at it, can you plug my shop of swords?
~Toutousai
RETURN TO SENDER
To Naraku:
Naraku, I wouldn't make any threats like that if I were you. You forget that if you touch my old village or go after MY Inuyasha, I'll just purify you. You know I can too.
~Kikyo
P.S. If I can make it back on this list.. I can make it anywhere.
P.S.S. I always knew Yashira was bias against me.
RETURN TO SENDER
Oneesama:
That first P.S. just sounded wrong. It was almost something that Miroku would say. Also, Yashira isn't as bias as some of the other people out there, given some of the comments I've seen used when referred to you, you should consider yourself lucky. I'm just glad I'm not a BIATCH.
~Yours Kaede
P.S. That wasn't a typo either, people do spell it like that too.
P.S.S. Why is Inuyasha and Naraku so quiet? I'd thought they'd be cussing and fighting again by now.
Dear Villagers:
Please forgive Inuyasha's temper. As you can see he's just very temperamental. I don't think he took the whole booting thing from before too well and now that Kagome's is ill and Kikyo… well Kikyo's back on the list... it isn't helping matters much. BUT on a good note, when Kagome gets back she'll have a hell of a lot of reasons to use the magic word on Inuyasha, so you can all look forward that! ^=^
~Miroku
P.S. I'll TAKE care of the women.
P.S.S. Because me and Sango tied down Inuyasha, and Naraku kinda had a run in with Sesshomaru at the moment.
P.S.S.S YES… I GET THE FIC!!! WHOOHOOO!!
RETURN TO SENDER
Dear Villagers:
Never fear we will always be there to defend you from loud mouth two timers to centipede youkai and perverted houshi.
~a confident Sango
P.S. You may want to hide your women when Miroku's around. ^_~
P.S.S. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT THE FIC!! HE'LL DO PERVERTED THINGS!!
RETURN TO SENDER
Dear whoever is spamming the list:
PLEASE STOP SPAMMING IT.. OR I'LL HAVE TO BOOT EVERYONE AND THEN INVITE THOSE IN THAT I HAVE THEIR ADDRESSES FOR...
~Yashira: List Mummy
P.S. If you haven't guessed, I'm still currently fighting that vote on letting Kikyo back in so it would take a while before I can invite again. Still…I don't know how I could have been outvoted. I'm the only one here.
Stupid "return to sender" errors:
Some bastard fucked with my address book and I just know its Inu-koru's doing. Bleh, he is so dead.
I had to go and ask MY woman for the correct address. Poor thing, she's so ill right now, that I'm going to go back to her and tell her everything that's going on in the list, like the "faithful" wolf I am, and keep her warm. At least I'm faithful.. unlike some dog-turd we all know.
Anyway, I never have been to your stupid little village, I don't have any interest in it.
(time passes)
*Snickers* I see Inuyasha got tied up by some miserable humans… how pathetic. I'll send Kagome your wishes, although I'll be the one warming up by her side.
~Kouga
Dear Villagers:
I can see why you're concerned. What with Sesshomaru chasing Naraku around with Goshinki's tooth, Inuyasha fighting Naraku or Kouga.. or even Sesshomaru around the village.. I can't blame you. Although you have to wonder why you stick around in this area. Why not move to a cave or something… or.. hmm.. Why do I have such bad ideas!? I'm not like this when Kagome's around. WAAAAAAAI… Kagome, please get better, so I can say something witty or clever!!
~A depressed Shippo
P.S. Although its quite funny seeing Sesshomaru whip Naraku's ass with his poison whip. I didn't know Naraku could jump that high.
Feh,
Who cares about the villagers, they're just stupid little cretins who have no place here except to serve the greater power. Dance of the dead!!! AHA, watch their mindless selves DANCE!!
~Signed Kagura
P.S. Sesshomaru is chasing after Naraku you say? I must see this for myself!!!
…
~Kanna
Hmm…
Kanna is quiet this time.. I wonder if that means the threat of the "end of the world" has passed?
~a concerned Myoga
P.S. Kagome get better.
Let's see:
Villagers are humans and are beyond my care or concern. As for Naraku I'll give him credit... he can run fast when he wants to.
Sesshomaru
P.S. Oh by the way, Rin is exempt. If you have a problem take it up with Jaken.
Dear Sesshomaru:
WITH ME?! I shall use my stick!
~A whining Jaken
P.s. BUT WHY ME?