Disclaimer:  These characters do not belong to me.  If they did ER would be having a very different season.

Spoilers:  Up to and including 10.10 and 10.11

Summary:  Carter returns from Africa and he and Abby try to coexist at County.

Chapter 5

            I am finally beginning my last rotation as a medical student.  It is in the ER, and in 12 more weeks I will be finished.  Part of me can't wait, and I hope that the next few months fly by.  However, there is another part of me that is scared to finish, scared to become a doctor, and scared to move on.

"Hey Abby!  Back on ER rotation?"  Gallant calls to me from the admit desk.

"Yup.  I've come back for more."

Gallant smiles warmly at me.  "Well, I'm glad you're here.  We're getting slammed today and could use all the help we can get."

I roll my eyes and say, "Great.  Just what I was hoping for.  Do I have time to put my stuff down and get some coffee?"

"Yeah, sure.  But when you're done could you work up the guy in Curtain 1?"

"No problem.  Give me five minutes."

I head towards the lounge and smile.  I'm glad Gallant is on, he's always been sweet to me, and ever since I went back to medical school he's done nothing but offer his support.  I push open the lounge door and am greeted by the sight of Susan getting coffee and Luka sitting on the couch.  They both look over at me with guilty expressions on their faces.

"What?" I ask.

Susan's expression quickly changes to one of relief.  "Oh, sorry Abby, we thought you were Carter.  It's crazy out there, but I really needed some coffee, but that means it's just him and Gallant out there right now."

"Uh-huh.  And what's your excuse Luka?"

"I can't find my patient and I thought she might be in here?"

"Sounds good to me, but I don't think Carter is going to buy it."

Susan laughs as she sits down at the table with her coffee.  "So in 12 more weeks you're done right?"

"Yep."

"Did you find out where your residency is yet?"

"No, I probably won't find that out for awhile."

"Where did you apply?"  Luka asks from the couch.

"A bunch of places.  Here, Northwestern, some hospitals in Minnesota…"

Just then Carter pops his head in the door.  "Susan!  Your patient pulled out her IV and is walking up and down the hall singing show tunes.  Could you do something with her?"

"Fine.  It's not like I needed the caffeine anyways," Susan grumbles as she storms out of the lounge, tossing her Styrofoam cup in the trash as she leaves.

I feel Carter's eyes fall on me and look up to find he has a huge grin on his face. 

"You're on today?"

"Nah, I just felt like hanging out in the lounge with my lab coat on."

Carter shakes his head and chuckles at my sarcasm.  He begins to say something but then notices Luka is in the room.  "Oh hey Luka."

"Hey Carter, I was just getting back to work."  Luka makes a quick exit, the guilty expression returning to his face.

"Did you hear from Eric again?"

"No, but my mom did.  She wired him some money for a bus ticket, and he's staying with her now."  I look down at the table; I'm still not that comfortable discussing Eric with Carter after everything that's happened.

"How's he doing?"

"Okay.  Maggie's trying to get him into therapy, but I..."

Haleh abruptly enters the room. "MVA coming in.  2 critical and 1 minor."

"ETA?"

"Pulling up right now." 

And with that, my day begins.

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            After 5 hours of trauma after trauma, things seem to be slowing down a bit.  The board is close to being cleared, and I only have one patient right now.  Unfortunately, she is a hypochondriac and has been following me around the hospital, describing a new symptom every five minutes.  I have called psych about ten times, but they have yet to make an appearance.  I'm walking towards Exam 2 when I hear her call my name.

"Dr. Carter, Dr. Carter…"

I duck into Exam 2 and quickly close the door and the blinds.  I stand still, silently praying she didn't see where I went.  I hear her walk by, still calling my name, and I let out a sigh of relief.

"Avoiding someone?"

I jump at the voice that comes from behind me, knocking over a tray of instruments in the process.  I turn to see Abby sitting cross-legged on a gurney with a large medical book sitting open on her lap.

"God Abby, you scared me half to death!"

"Well, it's not my fault you don't look to see who's in a room when you enter."

"Sorry, I think Mrs. Morrison is stalking me."

"Hypochondriac in Curtain 2?"

"That's the one!"  I look at the book in Abby's lap and ask, "Studying for boards?"

She lets out a groan and says, "Unfortunately."

"How's it going?"

"Not well.  I've taken two practice tests and failed both."

"Ouch."  I pause, wanting to offer my help, but not sure if she'll accept or if it is wrong for me to offer.  I haven't seen her since the Foundation dinner two nights ago, and I'm not sure how or if the evening changed the dynamics of our post break-up relationship.  The rational part of me wants to keep my distance, but another part of me just wants to be around her.  That latter wins this particular argument and I say, "I could help you study."

Abby looks up at me and I can see she's struggling with the same issues I am.  I'm hoping her decision is the same as mine, and I find myself holding my breath when she tentatively answers, "Okay."

I break into a smile and say, "Great!  What time do you get off?"

She looks at her watch and replies, "In three hours."

"I'm off in two. How 'bout I hang around for a bit and then we could go get something to eat while we study?"

"Alright."  Abby pauses, and I'm afraid she's changed her mind, but am pleasantly surprised when she says, "Thanks, John."

"No Problem."

I've got 30 minutes until I'm off, and another hour after that until dinner with Abby.  An ambulance is bringing in what will hopefully be my last patient of the day. When I walk outside to greet it, I see Abby has beat me to it.

"Okay Abby, what have we got?"

"Betty Allen, 71 year old female.  Fell in the shower, possible ankle fracture.  Seems to be a little disoriented."

I see a small girl with brown pigtails climbing out of the ambulance. "Who's that?"

"I'm Claire."

Abby squats down so she is eye level with the girl.  "Hi Claire.  I'm Abby.  Is this your grandmother?"

"Uh-huh.  Is she going to be okay?"

"Well, we've got to check her over, but it looks like it.  How old are you, Claire?"

"Seven."

"Where are your parents?"

"They're dead.  I live with Grams."

Abby stands up as I motion for her to come help me.  "Okay Claire, why don't you go with Haleh and I'll come get you as soon as we're done with your grandmother."

Claire nods her head as Abby and I wheel the woman into the hospital.

We've just finished examining Claire's grandmother, and it's pretty apparent that she is suffering from Alzheimer's disease.  Mrs. Allen seems to be completely unaware of her surroundings, and I'm wondering how she could possibly be taking care of a 7 year old.  Abby left to go get Claire, and I'm waiting for them to return.  I hear the door click open and look up to see Claire standing next to Abby, clutching her hand with a terrified expression on her young face.

"Hi Claire."

"Is Grams okay?"  She bites her bottom lip as she awaits my answer, reminding me a lot of Abby.

"Well, she broke her ankle, but we put a cast on it and it should heal just fine."  I stop for a moment and look at Abby, who then looks at Claire.  She sits down on a stool so that she is the same height as the girl.  She reaches out and tucks a loose piece of hair behind Claire's ear and says, "Claire, does Grams forget things a lot?"

Claire's eyes fill with tears and she whispers, "Yes."

"Is there anyone who helps her when she does forget things?"

Claire nods her head and answers, "I do."

"No, I mean any other grown-ups that help?"

Claire begins to get more upset.  "She doesn't need any one else to help!  I make us dinner, I know how to use the washing machine and I help her find things. I'm her big helper."

Abby gently grasps Claire's hands.  "I know sweetie, but we think your grandmother is sick, and she's going to continue to forget things, and it's going to get to be too much for even her big helper to handle all by herself."

All of a sudden Claire bursts into tears.  Abby immediately scoops her up into her lap and gently rocks her.  Claire cries against her shoulder for a moment, then pulls back and says in a voice so quiet I can barely hear,

 "Sometimes she doesn't know who I am."

Claire just left with a social worker.  We couldn't find any other family and she obviously couldn't go home with her grandmother.  It had been rough, and I could tell Abby had taken it pretty hard.  I walk out into the ambulance bay and see her sitting on a bench, fiddling with her hands and staring off into space.  I sit down next to her.

"You okay?"

"I don't think I'm the one you should be worried about."

"You know, there's still a good chance they'll find a family member she can live with."

Abby continues to stare into the distance.  "I know, it's not just that…."

I look at her and raise my eyebrows, silently asking her to continue.

"It's just, it isn't right that she had to grow up so fast.  I mean, she's seven years old for god's sake.  She's been taking care of her grandmother for who knows how long, and now she's basically all alone."

I know we aren't just talking about Claire anymore.  As I look over to Abby, who looks so small and sad, I come to the realization that there are always going to be moments like this for her, times when she simply can not control the pain she has experienced.  She's seemed so happy and self-assured since I've been back from Africa, I had forgotten exactly how much sorrow she has lived through.  I am overwhelmed with admiration for how far she has come, and I suddenly understand what a difficult journey the past eight months must have been for her.  I also realize that I want more than anything to be the one who helps her escape when her memories overtake her.

"Hey, are you off yet?"

Abby looks down at her watch and nods her head.

I stand up and hold out my hand.  "Well then it's time to hit the books.  Professor Carter is at your service."

She grabs my hand and pulls herself up.  "I just gotta get my stuff."  Then she turns and walks back to the hospital, and although I can't see her face, I somehow know she is smiling.

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            I've just eaten more food than I thought was humanly possible.  I think it was a subconscious ploy to avoid studying.  Studying has always been my least favorite part of school.  Carter, however, seems to be enjoying looking through my textbooks and is getting some sort of sick pleasure from quizzing me on what feels like thousands of procedures and terms.  It's kind of unnerving actually.  I bet he was the kid who answered every question correctly in school.

"Okay here's a tough one."

I roll my eyes at him and whine, "Can we please take a break?"

"Fine.  I've already passed the test, I don't care."

"I would shut up if I were you."

He does, and I feel bad.  He's only trying to help.  I decide to change the subject.

"So how are things at the Foundation going?"

He looks up, confused.  "What?"

"How are things at the Foundation?  I figured since we went to that dinner the other night you were becoming more involved."

Carter shakes his head and I notice he has begun to fidget with his fork.  "Actually, that's the only thing I've done.  Although the board keeps hounding me to meet with them."

"Didn't your grandmother make you president?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I just thought if you were president you'd have to be a little involved, that's all."

Carter continues to play with his fork, and I can tell he's becoming agitated.  "I don't know why she made me president.  Dad was the one who was interested in dealing with all of this.  She knew I didn't want anything to do with it.  Sometimes I think she did it just to piss us both off."

My thoughts drift back to over a year ago when we had a similar discussion.  I remember it ending in an argument, and with Carter dropping me off at my apartment where I spent a rare night alone.  I hesitate to pursue this conversation further, but something inside me tells me to press the matter.

"Maybe she thought this would be the best thing for the Foundation."

"Why would she think that?"

I take a deep breath and continue.  "Maybe she thought that you could take the Foundation in a better direction than your father could.  John, you have such a passion to help people.  Maybe this was your grandmother's way of acknowledging that.  I know you feel guilty for having so much money when there are people in the world who have next to nothing.  But John, your grandmother has given you such a great opportunity."

"You know, I never really thought of it that way.  I just always figured it was another one of Gamma's attempts to control my life."

"Maybe it was.  It just seems like you have a chance to make a difference in a way that few people can."

Just then the waitress comes by to check on us.  "Can I get you anything else?"

Carter looks at me and I shake my head.  "I think I'll explode if I have anything else."

Carter breaks into laughter and the waitress walks away with an annoyed look on her face.

Carter asks, "Do you want to study anymore?"

"No, my brain is stuffed too."

"Well, I don't want any part of you to explode, so let's get outta here."

We pay the check and head out after Carter offers to walk me home.  It's only a few blocks, and I would be perfectly fine walking by myself, but I accept his offer.  I try not to smile too much when he casually grasps my hand with his.  As we make our way into the night, I realize how incredibly grateful I am that our friendship is back in my life.

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Authors Note:  Well, this chapter was supposed to be angst-free.  Didn't quite make it, but hopefully it was a little bit more light-hearted.  Two more chapters and a possible epilogue to go!

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far!  Knowing people are reading and actually enjoying this story gives me warm fuzzies!

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