Title: I Will Always Love You

Author: Tizzylish

Disclaimer: Not mine belong to Joss, song belongs to dolly parton. (yeah that's right she wrote it)

Spoilers: Umm end of Buffy season three and "IWRY"

Summery: Angel thinks about his and Buffy's break up from "The Prom" to "IWRY"

Pairing(s): it's angsty B/A

Authors note: Yup another song fic. I'm crying right now as I listen to the song, it just screams Angel's thoughts about the break up. And yes I'm trying to pathetically sing along *g*.

***

If I
Should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go
But I know
I'll think of you every step of
the way

It was hard, to be around her and not be able to be with her, but he thought he could do it. Now he knew she couldn't, no she shouldn't, he was standing in her way. She deserved more than he could give her, she deserved everything. And he was what blocked everything from her. Gods it hurt, hurt more than he thought he could stand, but he had to go. Go let her have everything.

And I...
Will always
Love you, oohh
Will always
Love you
You
My darling you
Mmm-mm

He loved her, loved her enough to walk away from his own everything. She was what made him become someone, someone to be counted, and he would always be in love with her. And was going to hurt her so much.

Bittersweet
Memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So good-bye
Please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you
You need

He packed up the mansion, only his books, clothes, and weapons would be joining him in LA. 'I don't' the words echoed around his head as he put the sword in a duffel bag. Her face had fallen, completely, he wanted to cry with her but if he had he would have backed out it. She ran away from him after that, and he stood shell-shocked, he let the love of his life go. Her picture was what came absent-mindedly into is hand next, the black and white photo didn't do her justice, he thought, as he ran a finger along her cheek. He could have this, a picture, and memories, priceless memories those would be his only company. Laced with an infinite joy and a nauseating pain. Heartbreak, he fell to the floor as he let the emotions assault him.

And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you
You, ooh

He was almost gone…done…about to dust. The pain…was unbearable, he couldn't see or hear all there was…was pain. She was right he couldn't leave her…he wanted to spend the rest of his life at her side…couldn't leave. She was right…but he was so close, maybe it was his time to…go.

I hope
life treats you kind
And I hope
you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish you joy
and happiness
But above all this
I wish you love

This was their last moment, he tried to tell her what he wanted for her, from across the mist. He wanted her to be happy, to grow old, to have children, to find some else to love. She deserved everything she ever dreamed of, and everything he had dreamed for her. He just wanted her to find happiness, even if it wasn't with him. Wanted her to go on with her life, to go into the sun and laugh everyday. He told her all this from across the mist and she told him she knew what he wanted. But she wasn't going to forgive him easily. And with that on last look before he walked away they said 'I Love You'

And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you

He had survived a week, exactly a week since Graduation, granted he was really drunk. He found a place to live, bought a car, and visited Hemery High exactly once. But attempted to drive to Sunnydale, to crawl back to her five times. He wasn't what she needed, she needed a normal life, so he was going to let her.

I, I will always love
You....
You
Darling I love you
I'll always
I'll always
Love
You..
Oooh
Ooohhh

She just walked away; he picked up the clock and surveyed the damage. He could ask Doyle to clean it up. Right now he just needed to hit something, make it feel as bad as he did. Part of him was overjoyed she wouldn't remember, the other part prayed she would. He knew he loved her before, but now God would he be able to go on knowing what they had, what they could have had? But he had to, when she walked out the door he sent a silent endearment to her, and excepted the one eternal truth, he would always love her.