Disclaimer: Not mine. Sadly.
**********************************
It was decided by all three, that the quarters above decks were most certainly more pleasant than the brig. Once they were on board the first order of business was to tend to Will's new injury. He certainly did seem to be getting a lot of those during this adventure. That fact made Elizabeth feel even worse, the fact that his first beating had been protecting her, and this too, was from protecting her. Even when she didn't deserve it. Though she tried to help, Will insisted on dressing his own wound.
The simple truth was that Will didn't exactly want to be around Elizabeth for any long period of time. It wasn't entirely out of anger anymore, but because when she was around he almost felt like bursting into tears. That was something he had too much pride to do, though, but he still thought it best to remove the temptation. There was still anger, as was to be expected after one is betrayed, but hurt was becoming more dominant. The reality of what had happened was setting in - it wasn't a dream. It was a very real problem, something that couldn't be ignored.
"Just go and see if Jack needs your help." Will said simply, pushing her hands away from the hole in his chest.
He knew he wasn't helping his case at all by sending Elizabeth back to Jack, even for a minute. But, if they intended to get back to Tortuga, and Port Royal, everyone would need to pull their weight, considering they had nowhere near a full crew.
"Okay .." She kept her hands to herself and looked away, understanding what wasn't being said, "Under two conditions."
"What?"
"One, that you get some rest here." She bit her lip, and looked into his eyes briefly, "and two, that you and I talk once you're rested."
The blacksmith thought for a moment, he knew a talk would have to come at some point. As much as he dreaded it, there was no way around it. Perhaps sleeping would give him some clarity, a chance to dream up something to say that would make everything alright.
"Alright."
He stared at her, waiting for her to turn and leave. She got the message and rose from her seat next to the bed, walked across the room, and closed the door behind her.
William Turner rolled onto his side, ignoring the pain it caused, and let a single tear fall, before finally giving himself up to exhaustion.
Once she was on deck again, Elizabeth wasn't sure whether she should find quarters for herself, or see if Jack needed her help. There was a part of her that wanted to talk with him too, find out what he was feeling. But wouldn't something like that push her farther from Will? The dilemma being: she wasn't sure she cared. She had caused him enough pain, yes, but sooner or later, she promised herself, she was going to do things her way, and not be only concerned with the consequences.
Jack was once again standing at the helm, though he didn't seem so proud as usual. Despite her better judgement, Elizabeth found herself walking in his direction, as if she had no will of her own. His eyes moved from the horizon briefly, and noted her presence.
"S'awfully cold out here. Sure you're up to standing against the elements, Ms. Swann?"
Ms. Swann. For a moment she felt as if it was her that had been stabbed. Maybe Jack did hate her, maybe he did think she was a whore. She realized that the questioned hadn't even been asked, so how was she supposed to be sure?
"God, Jack. Please not you too."
He cocked his head to one side, as if he didn't know what she was saying. But she knew, he knew, he knew exactly what he was doing. There was a point and purpose behind addressing her in that manner. He was keeping his distance now, and it made her want to scream.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, still acting clueless.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about." A hand was placed on her hip, her tone was demanding, "It's not cold, Jack, its the Caribbean, and summer."
He nodded shortly, "Yes, Ms. Swann, I s'pose yer right."
He said it again.
"Elizabeth!" She almost shouted. "My goddamn name is Elizabeth!"
Jack's eyes went wide with suprise, because she'd never used that language before, and he studied her for a moment before answering.
"Yes, it is."
Satisfied that he hadn't argued with her, a silence fell again. After a moment Elizabeth got enough courage to say what she'd wanted to say.
"I --"
"I --" Jack began a second after her.
She laughed nervously, and he held out his hand, indicating that she could speak first.
"I was just going to say, I'm sorry."
If she didn't know any better she would have sworn that Jack looked disappointed. Hurt even. But instead the pirate just nodded, his eyes had moved back onto the ocean before him.
"Were ya now?"
"Yes, and you?"
He looked confused for a moment, as though he didn't remember that he had begun to speak too. Finally a light came on somewhere and he seemed to recall what he was going to say. His face fell, though, and for whatever reason, he did not say it.
"I was just goin' ta apologize too."
"Oh .."
Elizabeth now wore the same expression that Jack had when she had made her apology. It was clear that there was a lot not being said, and no one was willing to say it. After another long pause, Jack finally spoke, almost too himself.
"Funny ole world, innet?"
"What's that?" She asked hopefully.
He regarded Elizabeth for a moment, as if he was amazed that she had interrupted his private conversation with himself, but finally, satisfied with her being around, continued.
"S'nothin'." The look she shot him said that she didn't believe it was 'nothin' and he'd better go on, so he did, "It's just that, I'm a pirate. Used ta comin' and goin' as I see fit. Takin' whatever the hell I want and givin' nothin' back. No remorse .."
"Yes .." Elizabeth was encouraging him to continue. He did.
Leaving the helm, Jack began to pace, totally caught up in what he was saying now.
"And women?" He gave a small chuckle, "They were nothin' more than good bed warmers .." He quickly continued his rant at her disgusted look, "Never got attached ta one, never got all poetic, unless I was gettin' somethin' in return. I think with m'blood, which does not always rush in the direction of my brain. But then you come along."
She caught her breath, as he paused and looked directly at her.
"And then I came along." She whispered, urging him to go on.
"Aye," He nodded and began pacing again, "It's not just that yer pretty, lass. God knows I've seen enough pretty women .. there was somethin' else, and I was determined to figure out what it was. I saw it the first time ye opened yer eyes, on that dock, and looked at me. Saw it again on the Interceptor when ye fought like a real pirate, right `longside the men, and again on that damned island."
"What did you see?" She was hardly aware that she'd asked that aloud. But Jack stopped pacing and walked towards her.
"Fire." A weathered hand was placed on her the smooth skin of her cheek, "I saw a fire in ye, Lizzy. In yer eyes. It was just like the one in my own .. and every single time ye looked at me I knew that I'd be perfectly content ta let the fire consume me."
Jack Sparrow the poet. Somehow this all wasn't the shock it should have been, somehow she knew that he had a heart like that in him. He was too passionate not to. He was too in love with life not to. A tear rolled down her cheek and he wiped it away with his thumb.
"When I came back .. I saw the fire goin' out. An` I couldn't bare it. They were killin' you."
"So you invited me on the Pearl."
"So I invited you on the Pearl," he nodded, "But the one thing ole` Jack forgot to take into account, milady, is that my life doesn't work that way. I don't deserve ta be that close to such a fire .. Lizzy .. and that's why I've gotta do somethin' that goes against every pirate bone in me body."
"What?"
He finally removed her hand from her cheek, but continued to look into her eyes.
"I've gotta give ye back."
"What? Why?" She sounded almost desperate. How could he say those things to her and then just end it?
"Because yer not mine. Yer Will's, an` I can't betray him anymore. He's a good man, he doesn't deserve it."
"Don't I get any say in this?" She asked, praying the answer would be yes.
"You don't know what yer askin', luv."
"By doing what?"
"Lovin' a pirate."
**********************************
It was decided by all three, that the quarters above decks were most certainly more pleasant than the brig. Once they were on board the first order of business was to tend to Will's new injury. He certainly did seem to be getting a lot of those during this adventure. That fact made Elizabeth feel even worse, the fact that his first beating had been protecting her, and this too, was from protecting her. Even when she didn't deserve it. Though she tried to help, Will insisted on dressing his own wound.
The simple truth was that Will didn't exactly want to be around Elizabeth for any long period of time. It wasn't entirely out of anger anymore, but because when she was around he almost felt like bursting into tears. That was something he had too much pride to do, though, but he still thought it best to remove the temptation. There was still anger, as was to be expected after one is betrayed, but hurt was becoming more dominant. The reality of what had happened was setting in - it wasn't a dream. It was a very real problem, something that couldn't be ignored.
"Just go and see if Jack needs your help." Will said simply, pushing her hands away from the hole in his chest.
He knew he wasn't helping his case at all by sending Elizabeth back to Jack, even for a minute. But, if they intended to get back to Tortuga, and Port Royal, everyone would need to pull their weight, considering they had nowhere near a full crew.
"Okay .." She kept her hands to herself and looked away, understanding what wasn't being said, "Under two conditions."
"What?"
"One, that you get some rest here." She bit her lip, and looked into his eyes briefly, "and two, that you and I talk once you're rested."
The blacksmith thought for a moment, he knew a talk would have to come at some point. As much as he dreaded it, there was no way around it. Perhaps sleeping would give him some clarity, a chance to dream up something to say that would make everything alright.
"Alright."
He stared at her, waiting for her to turn and leave. She got the message and rose from her seat next to the bed, walked across the room, and closed the door behind her.
William Turner rolled onto his side, ignoring the pain it caused, and let a single tear fall, before finally giving himself up to exhaustion.
Once she was on deck again, Elizabeth wasn't sure whether she should find quarters for herself, or see if Jack needed her help. There was a part of her that wanted to talk with him too, find out what he was feeling. But wouldn't something like that push her farther from Will? The dilemma being: she wasn't sure she cared. She had caused him enough pain, yes, but sooner or later, she promised herself, she was going to do things her way, and not be only concerned with the consequences.
Jack was once again standing at the helm, though he didn't seem so proud as usual. Despite her better judgement, Elizabeth found herself walking in his direction, as if she had no will of her own. His eyes moved from the horizon briefly, and noted her presence.
"S'awfully cold out here. Sure you're up to standing against the elements, Ms. Swann?"
Ms. Swann. For a moment she felt as if it was her that had been stabbed. Maybe Jack did hate her, maybe he did think she was a whore. She realized that the questioned hadn't even been asked, so how was she supposed to be sure?
"God, Jack. Please not you too."
He cocked his head to one side, as if he didn't know what she was saying. But she knew, he knew, he knew exactly what he was doing. There was a point and purpose behind addressing her in that manner. He was keeping his distance now, and it made her want to scream.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, still acting clueless.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about." A hand was placed on her hip, her tone was demanding, "It's not cold, Jack, its the Caribbean, and summer."
He nodded shortly, "Yes, Ms. Swann, I s'pose yer right."
He said it again.
"Elizabeth!" She almost shouted. "My goddamn name is Elizabeth!"
Jack's eyes went wide with suprise, because she'd never used that language before, and he studied her for a moment before answering.
"Yes, it is."
Satisfied that he hadn't argued with her, a silence fell again. After a moment Elizabeth got enough courage to say what she'd wanted to say.
"I --"
"I --" Jack began a second after her.
She laughed nervously, and he held out his hand, indicating that she could speak first.
"I was just going to say, I'm sorry."
If she didn't know any better she would have sworn that Jack looked disappointed. Hurt even. But instead the pirate just nodded, his eyes had moved back onto the ocean before him.
"Were ya now?"
"Yes, and you?"
He looked confused for a moment, as though he didn't remember that he had begun to speak too. Finally a light came on somewhere and he seemed to recall what he was going to say. His face fell, though, and for whatever reason, he did not say it.
"I was just goin' ta apologize too."
"Oh .."
Elizabeth now wore the same expression that Jack had when she had made her apology. It was clear that there was a lot not being said, and no one was willing to say it. After another long pause, Jack finally spoke, almost too himself.
"Funny ole world, innet?"
"What's that?" She asked hopefully.
He regarded Elizabeth for a moment, as if he was amazed that she had interrupted his private conversation with himself, but finally, satisfied with her being around, continued.
"S'nothin'." The look she shot him said that she didn't believe it was 'nothin' and he'd better go on, so he did, "It's just that, I'm a pirate. Used ta comin' and goin' as I see fit. Takin' whatever the hell I want and givin' nothin' back. No remorse .."
"Yes .." Elizabeth was encouraging him to continue. He did.
Leaving the helm, Jack began to pace, totally caught up in what he was saying now.
"And women?" He gave a small chuckle, "They were nothin' more than good bed warmers .." He quickly continued his rant at her disgusted look, "Never got attached ta one, never got all poetic, unless I was gettin' somethin' in return. I think with m'blood, which does not always rush in the direction of my brain. But then you come along."
She caught her breath, as he paused and looked directly at her.
"And then I came along." She whispered, urging him to go on.
"Aye," He nodded and began pacing again, "It's not just that yer pretty, lass. God knows I've seen enough pretty women .. there was somethin' else, and I was determined to figure out what it was. I saw it the first time ye opened yer eyes, on that dock, and looked at me. Saw it again on the Interceptor when ye fought like a real pirate, right `longside the men, and again on that damned island."
"What did you see?" She was hardly aware that she'd asked that aloud. But Jack stopped pacing and walked towards her.
"Fire." A weathered hand was placed on her the smooth skin of her cheek, "I saw a fire in ye, Lizzy. In yer eyes. It was just like the one in my own .. and every single time ye looked at me I knew that I'd be perfectly content ta let the fire consume me."
Jack Sparrow the poet. Somehow this all wasn't the shock it should have been, somehow she knew that he had a heart like that in him. He was too passionate not to. He was too in love with life not to. A tear rolled down her cheek and he wiped it away with his thumb.
"When I came back .. I saw the fire goin' out. An` I couldn't bare it. They were killin' you."
"So you invited me on the Pearl."
"So I invited you on the Pearl," he nodded, "But the one thing ole` Jack forgot to take into account, milady, is that my life doesn't work that way. I don't deserve ta be that close to such a fire .. Lizzy .. and that's why I've gotta do somethin' that goes against every pirate bone in me body."
"What?"
He finally removed her hand from her cheek, but continued to look into her eyes.
"I've gotta give ye back."
"What? Why?" She sounded almost desperate. How could he say those things to her and then just end it?
"Because yer not mine. Yer Will's, an` I can't betray him anymore. He's a good man, he doesn't deserve it."
"Don't I get any say in this?" She asked, praying the answer would be yes.
"You don't know what yer askin', luv."
"By doing what?"
"Lovin' a pirate."