Disclaimer-Passions isn't mine
One Step Closer
Grace sat in the lobby on a cushioned chair. Dimly, she thought how these chairs were supposed to be comfortable but always wound up being scratchy.
'Kay said that about these chairs once,' Grace thought. But the thought of Kay, so angry, with so much hatred directing towards her, made her cringe.
"If it wasn't for you, Miguel and I would be together!"
"No…" Grace whispered. "Miguel doesn't love you."
"You don't care about me!"
"No, Kay, I love you and I want you to come back home."
"Maria Ivy…has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"
"Why Ivy? Ivy hates you. She only wants your father. Then she can send you away like she did her own children."
"I hate you!"
"No…" Grace drew her knees to her chest and put her hands on her head, running them down so her fingers made rivets in her hair. "No…"
"I hate you and you hate me! You love Charity more than me! If it wasn't for you, Miguel and I would be together! Ivy is a better mother than you!"
"NO!!" Grace shouted, bolting straight up and then slipping into darkness.
I cannot take this anymore
Saying everything I said before
All these thoughts, they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Less I hear, the less you'll say
You'll find that out anyway
Just like before
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe, 'cause I'm on step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break
I find that things aren't so clear
Wish I could find a way to disappear
All these thoughts, they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
Nothing seems to go away
Over and over again
Just like before
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe, 'cause I'm on step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe 'cause I'm one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break
Shut up when I'm talking to you
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up when I'm talking to you
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
Shut up
I'm about to break
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe 'cause I'm one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe 'cause I'm one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break
"Grace?"
Grace opened her eyes. She was staring at the ceiling. She noticed the tiny black dots of the ceiling tile's texture. Interesting. How many were there? She'd have to count sometime…
"Grace, its Sam. You fainted in the lobby. Are you okay?"
Grace giggled, like a schoolgirl, like a child. "I'm okay."
"Thank God. You gave us a scare, Grace."
"Gracie."
"What?"
"My name is Gracie."
"'Gracie'…? But Grace, I've never called you that."
"My name is Gracie," she said, insisting.
Sam suddenly remembered that when Jessica was 6 years old, she insisted on being called 'Jessie' and only 'Jessie', until she was 9 and thought that 'Jessica' sounded more grown-up. This was exactly how Grace was acting. Like a 6-year-old.
"Grace, how old are you?"
"Um…I don't know."
"Do you remember me?"
"Of course. You're Sammy. And there's Kay-Kay and Jessie and No-No. And Char'y and Mari."
'Well, she remembers me and the kids,' Sam thought.
"And there's Ives. I don't like Ives." Gracie looked at Sam. "She's scary."
'And she remembers Ivy,' Sam thought. "Grace…er, Gracie, I'm going to get Eve."
"Yay! Go get Evie, quick!"
'And Eve…' Sam hurried out of the room to find Eve.
"What's the news, Eve?" Sam asked, as Eve emerged in the lobby two hours later.
"Is Aunt Grace all right?" Charity asked.
Kay sat, sullen, in her wheel chair. She wanted to be in NICU with Maria, not in the lobby waiting for her mother.
Eve sighed. "It's very complicated. I'm no psychologist, but from what I can gather, all the problems she's been having with Kay and David and Ivy have built up and she finally snapped. She can't handle them in her present state, so she's…she's regressed."
"What's that mean?" Jessica, who had been called from home, asked.
"She an adult trapped in a 6-year-old's mentality. She remembers all her problems, but her actions will be that of a 1st-grader." Eve bit her lip. It was so hard to see her best friend like this. Grace had always seemed like a rock to her, immovable and strong.
She turned to the convalescent young mother and Grace's oldest daughter. "She kept asking for Kay-Kay. That's you."
"I don't want to see her," Kay said, turning her wheel chair and heading to leave.
"Kay."
Kay stopped and looked at her father. His face seemed long and gray and old.
"Please."
She sat for a second, twiddling her thumbs. She bit her lip and then turned, glaring.
"Fine. I'll spend 5 minutes with her, and then I'm going back to Maria."
"Hi, Kay-Kay!" Gracie sat up in the hospital bed.
"Hello," Kay said coldly.
"Is Mari okay? Is she gonna die?"
"Maria is doing better," Kay said flatly.
"Good. I don't want her to die."
"Liar," Kay said. "You want her to die."
"I do not!" Gracie said indignantly.
"Yes, you do! If Maria's dead, there's nothing keeping me and Miguel together! You want her to die!"
"Not true!"
"It is so!"
"La-la-la-la, I'm not listening," Gracie said in singsong, covering her ears.
Kay turned in her wheel chair, livid. "Good-bye."
She had made it to the curtain that separated the room from the hallway when Gracie spoke up.
"Kay-Kay!"
"WHAT?!"
"I'm SORRY!"
Kay stopped in her tracks.
"I love you, Kay-Kay!"
For a minute, Kay almost melted. But then she thought of Miguel and Charity and Grace, thought of her wounded pride and her anger and indignance. She squared her shoulders and wheeled away.
"Good-night, Grace," she said hardly.
"It's Gracie!" Grace squawked, and Kay pulled the curtain closed.
So, did you like the first chapter? This story could happen anytime after Maria was born. I had to miss this last week's episodes, so I don't know what's happening right now.
REVIEW!!