(THE NIGHT BEFORE)
After hours of running day and night the Uruk-hai start to complain.
"My feet hurt, I'm hungry and now I need a new loincloth because we didn't get to stop when I had to use the bathroom." Complained one of the Uruk- hai
"Shut up you pansy! I told you to use the bathroom before we left!" yelled the leader
"Well excuse me! He snapped "I was to busy caring one of this freaking midget on my back!" He threw Merry to the ground, he was still unconscious from earlier.
The Uruk-hai who was caring Pippin staggered up and threw him by Merry. He too started to bicker with the others. Pippin eyes went wide as he looked over at his lovely companion.
"Merry?! My love, wake up!! Wake up." He nudged him a couple of times, after a while he started to get frustrated.
"Merry, wake your ass! Pippin hissed
Merry groaned and stuck his thumb in his mouth.
"I don't want to." He whimpered
"Merry." Pippin growled, he used all his effort and kicked him under the belt. (Like he had anything!) Merry's eyes popped open and filled with tears.
"Homina, homina, homina!" he gasped
"Merry, we have to try and escape!" he whispered frantically
After a few minutes of Merry whining whimpers he gave a slight nod with his head, they started to do the "worm" towards the forest. Suddenly they hear a low chant in the background.
(tune to the meow-mix commercial)
We want meat we want liver hob-bit hob-bit please deliver!
Merry and Pippin's eyes went wide and they did the worm a little faster.
"No! We can not eat the gay little hobbits!" growled the leader.
"Raise your hand if you want gay hobbit for dinner!" cried one of the Uruk- hai
All of the Uruk-hai raised their hands except the leader raised their hands.
"No! We can not eat the stupid gay.." But before the leader could finish his sentence, his head rolled to the ground and his body crumpled. There behind the dead Uruk-hai, stood Captain Jack Sparrow holding a bloody sword in his hand.
"How the bloody hell did I get here? This isn't the Pearl." said Captain Jack Sparrow in his usual drunken voice and with a confused look on his face.
He shrugged his shoulders and walked away. The Uruk-hai stood there in complete silence with there mouth hanging wide open. In the background Merry and Pippin kept doing the worm as silent as they could.
"Whoever that was, he was hot!" Pippin whispered to Merry, he nodded his head in agreement.
"Well the appetizer is served!" yelled one of the Uruk-hai
They all swarmed on their dead leader ripping him apart piece by piece. Merry and Pippin looked at each other in disgust and kept going. One very ugly and short Uruk-hai who could not get into the feeding frenzy, spotted Merry and Pippin "worming" away. An evil grin crossed his face, showing his sharp, rotting teeth. He snuck up behind them and grabbed their large feet.
"Were do you think your going, little Halflings." He said in a scratch high pitched voice
Merry and Pippin squealed like little pigs, they tried their hardest to pull their legs away. Suddenly they hear a low rumbling sound and the earth starts to shake. The same rider that would later meet Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli rode up on their horses, slaughtering every Uruk-hai they could reach. Merry and Pippin "wormed" as frantically as they could, Pippin stopped and turned on his back, to catch some air. His eyes went wide a pair of horse hoofs were about to crush him.
"HOMINA HOMINA HOMINA!!" He screamed out of terror
After hours of running day and night the Uruk-hai start to complain.
"My feet hurt, I'm hungry and now I need a new loincloth because we didn't get to stop when I had to use the bathroom." Complained one of the Uruk- hai
"Shut up you pansy! I told you to use the bathroom before we left!" yelled the leader
"Well excuse me! He snapped "I was to busy caring one of this freaking midget on my back!" He threw Merry to the ground, he was still unconscious from earlier.
The Uruk-hai who was caring Pippin staggered up and threw him by Merry. He too started to bicker with the others. Pippin eyes went wide as he looked over at his lovely companion.
"Merry?! My love, wake up!! Wake up." He nudged him a couple of times, after a while he started to get frustrated.
"Merry, wake your ass! Pippin hissed
Merry groaned and stuck his thumb in his mouth.
"I don't want to." He whimpered
"Merry." Pippin growled, he used all his effort and kicked him under the belt. (Like he had anything!) Merry's eyes popped open and filled with tears.
"Homina, homina, homina!" he gasped
"Merry, we have to try and escape!" he whispered frantically
After a few minutes of Merry whining whimpers he gave a slight nod with his head, they started to do the "worm" towards the forest. Suddenly they hear a low chant in the background.
(tune to the meow-mix commercial)
We want meat we want liver hob-bit hob-bit please deliver!
Merry and Pippin's eyes went wide and they did the worm a little faster.
"No! We can not eat the gay little hobbits!" growled the leader.
"Raise your hand if you want gay hobbit for dinner!" cried one of the Uruk- hai
All of the Uruk-hai raised their hands except the leader raised their hands.
"No! We can not eat the stupid gay.." But before the leader could finish his sentence, his head rolled to the ground and his body crumpled. There behind the dead Uruk-hai, stood Captain Jack Sparrow holding a bloody sword in his hand.
"How the bloody hell did I get here? This isn't the Pearl." said Captain Jack Sparrow in his usual drunken voice and with a confused look on his face.
He shrugged his shoulders and walked away. The Uruk-hai stood there in complete silence with there mouth hanging wide open. In the background Merry and Pippin kept doing the worm as silent as they could.
"Whoever that was, he was hot!" Pippin whispered to Merry, he nodded his head in agreement.
"Well the appetizer is served!" yelled one of the Uruk-hai
They all swarmed on their dead leader ripping him apart piece by piece. Merry and Pippin looked at each other in disgust and kept going. One very ugly and short Uruk-hai who could not get into the feeding frenzy, spotted Merry and Pippin "worming" away. An evil grin crossed his face, showing his sharp, rotting teeth. He snuck up behind them and grabbed their large feet.
"Were do you think your going, little Halflings." He said in a scratch high pitched voice
Merry and Pippin squealed like little pigs, they tried their hardest to pull their legs away. Suddenly they hear a low rumbling sound and the earth starts to shake. The same rider that would later meet Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli rode up on their horses, slaughtering every Uruk-hai they could reach. Merry and Pippin "wormed" as frantically as they could, Pippin stopped and turned on his back, to catch some air. His eyes went wide a pair of horse hoofs were about to crush him.
"HOMINA HOMINA HOMINA!!" He screamed out of terror