Disclaimer!! I don't own phantom of the opera. Stan does. He owns everything. HE OWNS YOU! HE OWNS ME!! …I lied. Poor Stan owns nothing. Isn't that sad? Lets all be sad for Stan…
Erik- WAIT! No! you're supposed to be sad for me!! For meeee;_; poor, unhappy Erik!!
…I lied about that too, Erik didn't say that. Heehee it's late! Weel, the main point is that I don't own phantom of the opera, I didn't even make it up. Other, LUCKIER people own it, and a guy who's cooler than beans made it up. Or based it on a true story, I prefer to believe the former, cause it would be just too sad for a story like that to be true;_; And the other point is that I'm a compulsive liar at 3 in the morning__…mmm compulsive reminds me of food for some reason!
Kippo-girl- today you get an extra special treat! More story^__^ more funniness! I wrote more just for you!!!
Erik- I don't know how you can call this funny T_T
Kippo-girl- you know Erik, you aren't NEARLY as funny as you could be you know that?
Erik- I DON'T WANT TO BE FUNNY!!! I HATE YOU!!! I HATE EVERYTHING!! WHY DON'T PEOPLE JUST LEAVE ME ALONE_____ *storms of in a rage*
Kippo-girl- *yells at him* see what I mean??!! * Looks and sees nightslayerzimma* oh hello^_^
Night slayer Zimma- hello!! ^^*Throws a redead on Kippo-girl an then lets out a maniacal laugh then runs off to go get stuff to dispose of Stan* weehehehehehehehehehe^__^
Kippo-girl- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HELPMEGETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFFWAAAAAAHHHHHELPMEANYONEHEEEEELPPWAAAAAHHHHHERIK;_; *runs around in cirles with a redead on her*
Stan- …just start the story before this gets any stupider T__T
Erik- haahaa that's actually pretty funny!
Chapter 4!!!! 2nd intermission!!! REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement!!*ahh it's nighttime, the time for dreams…*
*fades into a happy Raoul humming and singing and just in a happy mood!! ^__^ he just walked into Erik's house, and now we see a sad dejected Erik slumped down on the floor with his back on the couch* Raoul- Hi! ^__^
Erik- *is sad*
Raoul- why you so sad?
Erik- *looks at Raoul and looks sad some more*
Raoul- aww, I can't let my poor buddy be this sad!! *thinks* …I know what will cheer you up!!
Erik- *looks at Raoul sadly*
Raoul- *stuffs his hand in his pocket, and takes out his hand shaped as a fist, with his thumb in between his index finger and his middle finger* look! I got your nose! *wiggle wiggle* ^____^
Erik- EGADS YOU'RE RIGHT!! And it's still fresh with youthful vibranceness!! I demand My nose back!! Give it meeeeee!
Raoul- wait! The voices in my head just told me we have to sing a song!
Erik-* gasp!!* You can't disobey the voices!!
*The Persian all of a sudden busts in and starts to play dinky music on a kazoo. Erik and Raoul start doing a stupid little dance ^__^*
Raoul-Hot dogs, Armor hot dogs,
Erik-What kind of kids eat armor hot dogs?
Raoul-Fat kids!!
Erik- Skinny kids!!
Raoul- Kids who climb on rocks!!
Erik- *makes a intimidating look* Tough kids!!
Raoul- *makes an innocent look* Sweet kids!!!
*The Persian pipes in* Persian- Even kids with chicken pox love hot dogs!!
Erik and Raoul- Armor hot dogs!
*Christine suddenly appears and the all sing the end* All- The kind KIDS LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!!!!! *all waving their hands in the air while singing LOOOVE!!!*
*after they're done singing there's an uncomfortable silence…*
Erik-…so can I have my nose back now?
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In A.D. 1885 war was beginning…
Andre and Firmin- What happen?
MM. Giry- Someone set us up the chandelier!
MM. Giry- We get note.
Andre and Firmin- What!
MM. Giry- main screen turn on!
ERIK- How are you gentlemen! !
ERIK- All your opera house are belong to me.
ERIK- You are on your way to detruction.
Andre and Firmin- What you say!!
ERIK- you have no chance to survive make your time
ERIK- Ha ha ha ha….
Andre-…take off every "zig"
Andre- you know what you doing.
Andre- Move "zig".
Andre- for great justice.
Firmin-…what in God's name is "zig" ??
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*in his underground lair, talking to a big screen of people consisting of the opera house managers we only see the Erik's head and the big screen*
Erik- Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa! I'm on top of the world!!! I have Christine, Raoul's been punjabbed, and the whole opera house bows down to me!!! *we now see all of Erik*…but oh no, I'm naked O.O!!!!
*Everyone starts laughing except Erik*
Erik- T___T This sucks.
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Raoul- Christine! Christine listen to me! Whatever you may believe, this man…this thing…Is NOT your father!! *to the phantom* let her go! For God's sake, let her go!!!
Christine- *coming out of her trance* Raoul, no…
*Christine runs to Raoul, who embraces her protectively. The Phantom freezes for a moment and then suddenly seizes a pike, upon which is impaled a skull. At a movement from him, a flash of fire streaks and kinda does this pathetic wussy little fizzle that doesn't even come close to reaching Raoul*
Erik-errr… *the phantom tries again to make the skull spout out a fireball, and succeeds in making another pathetic attempt at fireball-making-ry* T__T aww screw it! *Erik punjabbs Raoul, hops down from the top of the gate thingy, and proceeds to beating Raoul with the skull pike thingy* Bad Raoul!!!
Christine- Oh Erik, you look so cute when you're beating up Raoul like that! I want to marry you right away!!
*Erik and Christine embrace as Raoul dies of punjabbery in the background and they live happily ever after!!*
Part 2!! Dream time over!!! The real story continues!!*opens up to Erik and Raoul in the living room. Raoul is still punjabbed (what? Did you think Erik would let him go?? Silly^__^) Erik appears to be VERY upset and is ranting and raving at Roul…lets take a closer look at what's going on, shall we??^_^*
Erik- *foaming at the mouth* WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME MONSIEUR??!! I DARE you to say it!!!
Raoul- ^__^ got your nose!! *wiggles his thumb in-between his fingers! wiggle wiggle^__^*
Erik- O_O THAT'S IT!! YOU'RE A DEADMAN!!!
Raoul- but you were happy about it in my dream…
Erik- RRRRRRAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRR!!!!! *Lunges at Raoul*
Raoul- MEEEP!!! *Tries to run away but the Punjab lasso pulls him back* AAAIIIIIIEEE!
*Raoul is now running in circles while Erik is trying to catch him, during the midst of this, Christine enters*
Christine- what are you guys doing?^__^
*Everything stops!!*
Erik- *in the middle of getting ready to sock Raoul* Chri-Christine!! H-How did you get here??
Christine- weel…I couldn't find the Persian OR you sooo I got this handy device called the ErikBuddy2000™ and it just like having your own Erik!! It's sooo cute^___^
Erik- …you could have had the REAL Erik…
Christine- oh Erik I didn't hear you what did you say??^__^
Erik- Nothing nothing…
Raoul- oh look!! *Gets out PersianBuddy2000™* they can be friends!!
*Christine and Raoul connect their ErikBuddy2000™ and PersianBuddy2000™*
LCD Erik- …we meet again.
LCD Persian- That is true…
LCD Erik- you know what that means!! *Takes out Punjab lasso and smiles evilly*
LCD Persian- O_O wh-why do you want to kill me??!!
LCD Erik- hmmmm….I was programmed to^__^ *throws Punjab lasso at LCD Persian but he counters with "level of your eyes attack!!"* Oh so you gonna play dirty now!! Okay!!
LCD Persian- BRING IT ON UGLY!!!
*the LCD Persian and LCD Erik fight pokemon style!!!*
Christine- Eriky-poo use your fear tactic!! *LCD Erik takes off his mask and the LCD Persian is blinded with a face-full of ugly!!!*
Raoul- OOOH NOOO!
Christine- ^___^ Finish him off!! *punjabbery!! The LCD Persian loses!!*
Raoul- __
Christine- OOOOH I WIN I WIN!! What do I get honey??
Erik- *is watching in disbelief the whole time*
Raoul- A KISS!!!
*They are about to kiss but right before they do Erik tugs on the Punjab lasso a bit*
Raoul- UUURRRK!!!
Christine- *already forgot about it* well dear I really must be going^__^ before you come home bring back some beef okay??
Erik- WAIT!!….errr…I mean, umm…weel *blush* youmustbetiredsowhydon'tyoujustrelaxandtakeabreakhere*gasp* ^___^; you could…ehh…sleep in your room!! I'll open it up for you!!
Christine- *air headed beaming smile!!*Oh Erik^__^ you're so considerate! You guys just have your fun and I'll take a rest! *Erik opens up the room for her and Christine goes in. He then shuts the door behind her*
Erik- yes…hehehehehe…FUUN. *malicious smile*
Raoul- meep;_;
Erik- well, my faithful audience it's time for:
Erik's Handy Guide To Getting The Lady Of Your Dreams!!! ™
Raoul- YAY!!
Erik- first before I give you the next step I will elaborate on step 3! If your plan DOES backfire too soon and they figure out the real you, do not worry! You still have a chance^_^ but this is where the 4th step comes in!!
Step 4!!!Erik- Rid your self of ANY competition….even if step 3 was successful it would be best to get rid of ANY threat that might make your object of affection not want to be with you…Anyone you see as a possible threat MUST be eliminated…*another horribly malicious glance at Raoul*
Raoul- *isn't paying attention* MAN!! Why does Christine get her own room??!! I want my own room! Monsieur Phantom why don't I have my own room?
Erik-*snap! Can you here his mind snapping? ^__^ the strands of sanity are breaking yay!!*…hee…you want your own room here monsieur? I think I have JUST the room for you! You'll love it I'm sure I know I do…it has lots of trees-
Raoul-What kind of room has trees??
Erik-*a little agitated that he was interrupted* AND mirriors-
Raoul- woo mirrors I love them mirrors cause I can look at myself in them^__^ I'm very handsome you know…wait you wouldn't you be pretty hideous…
Erik- *SNAP!!* THAT'S IT YOU ARE A DEAD MAN!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRR!!! *Lunges at Raoul*
Raoul- AAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!! *Runs around in circles trying to get away from Erik*
End Chapter!!!^__^*just to let you know Raoul's still punjabbed^__^* Oooh maan I have the worst writers block__ I tried really hard on this chapter but I'm sorry it isn't that funny;_; I'm losing inspiration!! if you have some suggestions for me I'd really appreciate it! Please review^__^ I love them reviews! I like constructive criticism too so don't be afraid to correct me please! I would also like to note that the 1st and 3rd dreams were basically my brother's ideas for me story^_^ the 3rd dream was spoofeded from the family guy. I love that show^__^ and on a completely different note I get to see the phantom of the opera again for me birthday present^___^ It's in L.A.!!! oooh I can't wait___ so 'til next time!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEE THERE'S A REDEAD ON MY BACK GETITOFFGETITOFF!!!!_____________________ HELP MEEEEE!!!
Stan and Erik- haahaa she looks so stupid^__^