A/N: This isn't my main story – updates will be slow – but they will come. I want to thank all my readers for their wonderful reviews. Please make sure to read the author note at the end of this chapter. Important information posted.
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Rhiannon Rene sat quietly in her private office, trying to hide her obvious discomfort. Goddess or no, meeting him was not going to be pleasant. The former Duke would be arriving momentarily and Rene still hadn't decided how to approach him. Rene finally sighed and put her hands on her temples, rubbing softly. 'I can't die like mortals, but I can still get headaches! What a wonderful trade off!' Rene thought with a groan. 'Why did I even ask for him? He's going to fight me every step of the way.'
No matter what went on inside Rene's mind, she was certain of what she was doing. Roger had to be shown what had been and what was now. She couldn't allow him to stay in the dungeons his entire passing – it wouldn't work with a man like him. He was distinct and wise in the ways of deception. He needed to accept his past. Only then would he truly die. Until then, he was just a hassle to the soul guard. Rene had talked many times with The Great Mother Goddess and her famous Faithful. The stories they told where degrading.
Unable to remain seated, Rhiannon Rene stood and walked over to the outside wall of her office. It was made entirely of clear crystals. Touching her amber stone necklace, she looked out to see a view that made mortal's faint.
A faint purple and a vibrant pink colored the sky. The sun sang silently, glowing with the midmorning (Mithros was in a decent mood). Shooting stars crossed the above heavens, even by day. Sparkling water ran swiftly threw peacefully falling waters, while sweet smelling wild flowers grew on the banks of the river current.
A light knock echoed through the room. Rene turned, eyes determined. "Come in." Rene said evenly. A cleaned and refreshed guard entered her room, bowing at the sight of her.
"My Goddess, former Duke Roger awaits outside. He is yours to call." The guard stated. He gave the goddess a genuine smile.
Rene too – smiled. The soul guards were nice to those they knew – and they had known Rene since her childhood. "I call then – send him in. My thanks."
"As you wish." The guard replied quietly. He turned and opened the door. A once handsome man stood in the door. He was now, however, withered and pale. He looked as if he was in his early thirties – for after death – you don't age. Someone had given him fresh clothes and allowed him to bathe, for prisoners were never decently dressed. His face was bland as he looked at her. She fought an urge to frown. She knew exactly what he was thinking. It was a gift given to every goddess. As the Goddess of Peace, Rene was in need of such a tool. This man – had not changed. Of course, she had known that, but she had not expected the will in him. 'Mithros had been right. It will be nearly impossible to change him. I can do this. I have to.'
"Shall I be present, my goddess?" The guard asked, breaking into Rhiannon Rene's current thoughts.
She shook her head, dismissing the guard with a smile. "You have done more than you needed to. I thank you. He will cause no harm."
She saw the corners of Roger's mouth twitch.
'Good – we agree then.'
The soul guard bowed and left, leaving only Roger and the Goddess. Rhiannon Rene turned her attention to the man that stood before her. She almost looked away in disgust, but her training stopped her.
"Well." Rene stated quietly, locking Roger's eyes on her own. "I'm glad you accepted my invitation Roger. We have much to talk about." Her voice was easy on the ears, though any mortal who heard it would think of running water. Her voice was musical and smooth. In the depth of it all, it had a dangerous power to it.
Roger looked at Rene silently for a moment before speaking. "Yes – I am grateful to be out. You reward me."
Roger was an intelligent man, even if he used it foolishly. Rene smiled lightly to her guest. "Yes – well -- I have many things to show you." She said, allowing herself to scowl at him slightly.
Roger laughed for the first time in decades. Noting Rene's scowl, his eyes glinted in amusement. "Well my dear, I'm not a stranger in your eyes I see. Someone has told you of my past life."
Rene closed her eyes in a calming gesture. She was not going to allow him to read her emotions by what expressions she wore. Opening them slowly, she replied. "I am the Goddess Of Peace and my job includes learning of the past. My aunt, The Great Mother Goddess has told me a great deal more about you."
"I'm not the same man I was." Roger said, trying to lock his eyes on those of the goddess 'To think he would have lost any of his impudence. Mother help me!'
"No – you have not changed. You may think so – but you are the same man. To all and sundry, you are Roger of Conte – you are not a soul. Roger is an evil man. Souls are dead. I shall assure you that you owe more than a lifetime of debt. That will never change – and you are here because of that." Rene said firmly.
Giving him no chance to comment she continued. " Don't be irrational Roger-- not with me. I am nobody's fool." She touched her temples with her fingers. "You are a clever man, but that will get you nothing with a goddess. My mind tells me things. It tells me how you work and what you think. You will get no more chances Roger."
His eyes turned to ice. " My intentions were easy for you to see. Don't scold me for trying. The Zareds are a most unpleasant place."
"Don't make light of it Roger. I find you lucky. For all the hell you brought, you were pardoned. There are worse places, Roger." Rhiannon Rene said this knowing his reaction. Of course, he hadn't known about the pardon. She doubted he thought there could be a place worse than The Cages.
Roger eyed her suspiciously, trying to cover up the chills that ran down his spine at the thought. "Pardoned?" His voice was tense.
She smiled. 'Good – I have an upper hand then.'
"Tell me this Roger. Do you believe you destroyed your own life?"
He looked at her blankly for a moment before answering. " I believe I acted foolishly."
"You also know how such a foolish act changes humanity, correct?"
This time, he was silent for a longer period. When he finally answered, it was the answer Rene was hoping to get. "Yes. Such an act affects everything and not only the person who managed the act." He said plainly. Curving his eyebrows, he asked. "What are you getting at, goddess?"
"My job isn't to break you – My job is to show you how your impudence destroyed your life. We the gods – those of us concerned in mortal affairs – have found you incapable of understanding why it all happened the way it did. It's been too long – now I must intervene. When you ended your life – both times – life continued. Your enemies survived. Because of this – you were pardoned. There is hell beyond The Cages, Roger, and you were spared because your enemies survived."
"They survived?"
Rhiannon Rene nodded. "They continue to survive. They prosper in fact – congratulations Roger – you helped shape Tortall as it is today."
"You are implying what exactly?" His voice was pierced with emotion. His eyes were steel.
"Your actions – your failed ones – left Tortall harmed. But, because of them – they grew into the country they are today. It was their perseverance that got them through it. You just gave them a reason to strive."
Roger looked away from the goddess. When he looked back, his eyes looked dangerous.
His eyes did not affect the goddess. She did not fear him – he knew that. He could do nothing.
"My job is to show you that they survived. This is your chance – Roger. You will see first hand the victories of The Lioness, the reign of Jonathan, and the future of Tortall. You will meet the heir and his allies, those who make the future bright. You will even see it as a whole Roger. For the first time – you will meet Tortall."
He listened in silence. "You – are sending me back?"
Rene smiled. "There will be no third life awaiting you, Roger. We – I shall accompany you – will only go in spirit. You will be invisible them – and I as well. They will not know of our presence, which is well – for you would not like their reaction. Even they have heard of you."
She watched Roger's face carefully and in great detail. Anger, frustration, and alarm filled his eyes. He was silent.
She would end this conversation. " When you visit a menagerie and see the lions, you can always tell which ones were not born in captivity. They have that wild look in their eyes. Eventually, that look glazes over and they forget what it was like on the grassy plains and the pride in bringing down a kill." Her voice was even, daring him to protest.
He simply starred at her, eyes glowing in rage. "You plan to glaze me over, goddess?"
" No – I won't have to. You'll manage that on your own."
She said it so deeply that Roger backed up a step and looked at her – her unleashed anger roared with the intensity of a thundering waterfall. "I may be the Goddess of Peace but I have no joy in the likes of you." Her voice calmed. "I will see you tomorrow morning for our first session."
"Who will I see?" Roger asked quietly.
"We have no way of knowing. Remember what I told you about the lions. You have only one thing to gain from all this and you may not like it." Rene said, in a voice that didn't sound like her own.
Two large male guards came in through the entrance and headed for Roger. The smaller guard spoke a few words and motioned his hand toward Roger – it was a language quite different than any other he had ever heard. The black wire binding his hands returned. Roger looked up and met Rene's eyes. "What do I have to gain?"
"Acceptance. Acceptance of the path you have chosen. When you plotted against life – you were plotting against yourself. You could have grown old and died in your sleep. But you chose a different path and so the consequences will be different. You can accept what you deny or you can rot more than you already have." Her voice was even and firm.
Roger was pulled out the door and was lost from Rhiannon Rene's view. She walked out of her office and over to her personal dormitory, slamming the door as she went. There, she fell onto her divan, only to let out an exhausted sigh. 'Why – in divine name – did I accept mothers offer? Ah hell – I need some rest.' She took one last look at the ceiling before falling into a quiet slumber.
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A/N: I have revised this chapter – again. Its much more organized now. Well on to something important. I wanted to tell you that I do listen. I revised this chapter so I could work in the suggestions my reviewers made. I appreciate them. So please – to those of you who review – if you have questions about my story, I'll gladly answer them.
Question to my readers: Review and tell me some of the people you think he MUST run in to. I have a small list of my own, but I am interested in what you think. You have minds of your own after all – shoot me some names!
~Karr
(The Last Name)
