Author's Note: Hey, thanks for all the reviews. *hugs reviewers* Okay, to
answer some questions. . . This is the 3rd part of a trilogy, and Trouble
became a Lieutenant Colonel between the 1st and 2nd books. I didn't know
that Captain was higher than Lieutenant. I made the assumption because
Briar Cudgeon was (I think) called Lieutenant and he became Acting-
Commander during the first Artemis Fowl book. I assumed that if Captain was
higher, one of the captains might have had the position. Anyway, I went
through this story and my other stories and changed all the Lieutenants to
Lieutenant Colonel or Colonel (that's okay right?) Anyway in regards to
Holly/Trouble, I told you it was coming, but it's not here yet. It's
written and I know where its going and when, but that's a side plot and I'm
having problems with the stupid mess that's supposed to be the main plot.
The whole info leakage thing that I'm completely back into a corner with.
At any rate, I've got it, and it's written and I'll email a piece of it to
anyone who wants it (I think it's a really sweet scene but I can't put it
in 'til later). Just let me know if your interested. I'll stop boring you
now and let you get on with the story. Sorry the A/N is so long.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Root leaned back in the cushy leather chair in his office, talking on the phone. "Yeah, Archie, this is no joke. Don't tell a soul or I'll flay you within an inch of your life. We've got to put him somewhere for the day. That Mud Brat has made my life miserable enough the last few years so now it's time for a little payback. I just wish I could see it. Holly and him will be there in about an hour. I just sent them out in an armored LEP car so it'll be easy for you to recognize them. I mean, how many Mud Boys are running around here after all?"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Holly managed to smuggle Fowl out of the Police Plaza and into an armored car without being seen. She was in such good spirits that she didn't object when Fowl sat in the passenger's seat instead of the back hold of the vehicle.
"Where are we going, Captain?"
"To see Archie."
"Who is Archie and why are we going to see him?"
"Archie's an old friend. And we're going to see him because I need to take you somewhere. You're certainly not coming back to my house." She started whistling.
Artemis was somewhat worried. Holly was entirely too happy. Wherever she was taking him, it couldn't be good.
After an hour or so of driving they'd left the City behind (or almost nearly). They came to a house with gleaming white horses in a large picketed area.
The horses had horns.
Artemis read a large sign that said (in Gnomish letters) "Welcome to Archie's Unicorn Riding School".
Holly grinned. "You're in for a IfunI afternoon. This is the only place outside Haven, and the shuttles, underground that's equalized. Anywhere else and the pressure would crush your puny little lungs." She grabbed his arm and hauled him off toward an older man who was waving at them.
"Holly!"
"Archie, Root called you, right?"
"Of course he did. I had to cancel 2 appoints so that you two would be the only guests here for the afternoon."
"What am I doing here?" asked Artemis.
Archie said in Gnomishs, "He ain't too bright, is he?"
Holly said replied in English, "Don't let him fool you. He can read Gnomish. He knows exactly what he's doing here."
"If you mean, Captain, that you are going to try to get me on one of those IthingsI you are quite mistaken."
"Nope."
"What?"
"Fowl, we aren't going to try to put you on one of those things. We are going to put you on one of those things."
"No, you will not," he said, with as must dignity as he could muster.
"Yes, we will. You're going to learn to ride a unicorn."
Artemis hated horses.
"Unless of course you're afraid, or don't even know how to ride a horse?" taunted Holly.
"Certainly not!" He strode off toward the beasts. It wasn't something he'd normally do (trying to prove he could do something just because someone mocked him), but Artemis tried to climb onto one of the unicorns. He couldn't get the dratted thing to stand still. "Come back here. No, you stupid thing. D'Arvit!"
Holly and Archie were laughing and keeping their conversation in English, purely to vex Fowl. "How cute, the Mud Boy's cursing in Gnomish."
"He must have picked the habit up from you."
"I only curse so much when I'm around him. It's because he's annoying git."
"Would you like some help?"
"No, I'm fine," Artemis said, stiffly.
After about half an hour, Fowl accepted help. Archie and Holly led Fowl and one of the unicorns to the stable they put a saddle on the unicorn (although only beginners ever used saddles) and helped Fowl up onto its back with the lengthened stirrups. Holly and Archie held the reigns and petted the horse as they led it out of the stable. Holly and Archie instructed Fowl on what to do.
He listened but then said irritably, "Any idiot can do this. Let go."
"Fine by me." Holly let go.
Artemis dug his heels in the animal's sides trying to get it to move. The unicorn, Archie had said her name was Belle, certainly moved. Belle started rearing up on her hind legs and running wildly. Artemis tried to stay on. He tried and failed and landed on his rear with a loud thump and a large thud. Archie ran to get Belle under control.
Holly healed him. "Weren't you listening at all? Belle doesn't like that! You could have been killed."
"You were worried?"
"Not about you, just about my job."
"Oh."
Holly snagged one of the other unicorns and got on, galloping around the yard easily. She stared at Artemis, sitting on top of Belle, in a challenging way and he attempted to mimic her. By the time Archie announced they had to leave, Artemis was barely able to handle a slow trot alone.
Archie said, "Julius said for you to take him back to your place, Holls."
"I know." She looked disgusted at the thought.
"I'd let him stay here but it'll be better for him to be in the city. The pressure here isn't exactly great for a Mud Boy's lungs. I mean, it's better than most places but the Haven is best. Besides, my granddaughter is coming this afternoon."
"You tell her hi for me then." She gave him a hug. The man had been like an uncle to her. Nobody forgets their lessons on how to ride unicorns.
Holly glared at Artemis as they climbed in the car again. She was not looking forward to this at all.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Root leaned back in the cushy leather chair in his office, talking on the phone. "Yeah, Archie, this is no joke. Don't tell a soul or I'll flay you within an inch of your life. We've got to put him somewhere for the day. That Mud Brat has made my life miserable enough the last few years so now it's time for a little payback. I just wish I could see it. Holly and him will be there in about an hour. I just sent them out in an armored LEP car so it'll be easy for you to recognize them. I mean, how many Mud Boys are running around here after all?"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Holly managed to smuggle Fowl out of the Police Plaza and into an armored car without being seen. She was in such good spirits that she didn't object when Fowl sat in the passenger's seat instead of the back hold of the vehicle.
"Where are we going, Captain?"
"To see Archie."
"Who is Archie and why are we going to see him?"
"Archie's an old friend. And we're going to see him because I need to take you somewhere. You're certainly not coming back to my house." She started whistling.
Artemis was somewhat worried. Holly was entirely too happy. Wherever she was taking him, it couldn't be good.
After an hour or so of driving they'd left the City behind (or almost nearly). They came to a house with gleaming white horses in a large picketed area.
The horses had horns.
Artemis read a large sign that said (in Gnomish letters) "Welcome to Archie's Unicorn Riding School".
Holly grinned. "You're in for a IfunI afternoon. This is the only place outside Haven, and the shuttles, underground that's equalized. Anywhere else and the pressure would crush your puny little lungs." She grabbed his arm and hauled him off toward an older man who was waving at them.
"Holly!"
"Archie, Root called you, right?"
"Of course he did. I had to cancel 2 appoints so that you two would be the only guests here for the afternoon."
"What am I doing here?" asked Artemis.
Archie said in Gnomishs, "He ain't too bright, is he?"
Holly said replied in English, "Don't let him fool you. He can read Gnomish. He knows exactly what he's doing here."
"If you mean, Captain, that you are going to try to get me on one of those IthingsI you are quite mistaken."
"Nope."
"What?"
"Fowl, we aren't going to try to put you on one of those things. We are going to put you on one of those things."
"No, you will not," he said, with as must dignity as he could muster.
"Yes, we will. You're going to learn to ride a unicorn."
Artemis hated horses.
"Unless of course you're afraid, or don't even know how to ride a horse?" taunted Holly.
"Certainly not!" He strode off toward the beasts. It wasn't something he'd normally do (trying to prove he could do something just because someone mocked him), but Artemis tried to climb onto one of the unicorns. He couldn't get the dratted thing to stand still. "Come back here. No, you stupid thing. D'Arvit!"
Holly and Archie were laughing and keeping their conversation in English, purely to vex Fowl. "How cute, the Mud Boy's cursing in Gnomish."
"He must have picked the habit up from you."
"I only curse so much when I'm around him. It's because he's annoying git."
"Would you like some help?"
"No, I'm fine," Artemis said, stiffly.
After about half an hour, Fowl accepted help. Archie and Holly led Fowl and one of the unicorns to the stable they put a saddle on the unicorn (although only beginners ever used saddles) and helped Fowl up onto its back with the lengthened stirrups. Holly and Archie held the reigns and petted the horse as they led it out of the stable. Holly and Archie instructed Fowl on what to do.
He listened but then said irritably, "Any idiot can do this. Let go."
"Fine by me." Holly let go.
Artemis dug his heels in the animal's sides trying to get it to move. The unicorn, Archie had said her name was Belle, certainly moved. Belle started rearing up on her hind legs and running wildly. Artemis tried to stay on. He tried and failed and landed on his rear with a loud thump and a large thud. Archie ran to get Belle under control.
Holly healed him. "Weren't you listening at all? Belle doesn't like that! You could have been killed."
"You were worried?"
"Not about you, just about my job."
"Oh."
Holly snagged one of the other unicorns and got on, galloping around the yard easily. She stared at Artemis, sitting on top of Belle, in a challenging way and he attempted to mimic her. By the time Archie announced they had to leave, Artemis was barely able to handle a slow trot alone.
Archie said, "Julius said for you to take him back to your place, Holls."
"I know." She looked disgusted at the thought.
"I'd let him stay here but it'll be better for him to be in the city. The pressure here isn't exactly great for a Mud Boy's lungs. I mean, it's better than most places but the Haven is best. Besides, my granddaughter is coming this afternoon."
"You tell her hi for me then." She gave him a hug. The man had been like an uncle to her. Nobody forgets their lessons on how to ride unicorns.
Holly glared at Artemis as they climbed in the car again. She was not looking forward to this at all.