Author's Notes: I think I was rather depressed or in a bad mood when I wrote this. Ironic since I'm feeling just the opposite right now but oh well. I've been doing nothing but writing today and so it was only a matter of time before I got through everything and dug this chapter up in order to post it. It doesn't look very long to me oh well. I've ended my chapters where I think it fits. *grins* I saw Master and Commander on opening day. Awesome movie which I think you all should go see. Paul Bettany is the greatest!

Disclaimer: I am not Tolkien and therefore do not own any of the characters which appear in this story.

Pipsqueak Peregrin

Chapter Eight: Lost But Not Entirely Found

I hesitated on the border of the Old Forest. I knew I had to go in there but I didn't really want to. It was frightening and while I had laughed at the stories Frodo and Bilbo told me about the walking trees, now that I was faced with it... their fanciful tales seemed very real to me. But I had to go in there, if not for myself or Pippin then for Auntie. What I had done had hurt her deeply and I had to redeem myself and bring Pippin back home... even if it meant replacing myself.

I had left no markers to help me find my way back to Pippin. I remembered vaguely which direction I had taken into the woods but as I went in deeper, it only got darker. After a few moments' wandering I stopped. This was not getting me anywhere. Mum was right. The only thing I was doing was getting myself lost. I groped around blindly in the dark for a place to sit and attempt to gather my bearings. My fingers brushed along the smooth surface of a rock. I sat upon it, listening ever alertly to the sounds of the trees whilst trying to figure out where in the woods I could possibly be.

I didn't hear the sounds of running water so I was not near the river. This didn't help me to get my bearings very well. I sighed, staring blankly into the darkness ahead of me. I listened with growing nervousness at the creaking and groaning of the old trees. My thoughts went back once again to the stories of the tree folk. They could be all around me waiting to squash me and I'd never see them coming without any light. I shivered, rubbing my arms to try and comfort myself. I could only imagine the sort of fright Pippin was having. But why did I care?

That was when I suddenly became aware of a second sound around me. This one did not sound natural for a forest, even one so old as this. It was a soft whimpering sound, almost like something was quietly crying. Or at least it sounded quiet to me but that could have been because the sound did not seem to be near me. It was probably echoing off the trees around me. I sat there, listening to the sound before it clicked in my mind. It was Pippin! If I followed the sound I would find him!

I made my way through the trees, moving as swiftly as I could in the dark. It was difficult to tell but I told myself the noise was getting louder. I didn't know how I would find my way out of here again but that was not my main concern at the moment.

Out of nowhere came a root. My foot caught it and I fell forwards, hitting the dirt with a dull thump which, in the stillness of the air seemed to echo ominously. As I slowly picked myself up, grumbling and wincing at my sore toes I noticed the whimpering had stopped. There was now tension in the air. Pippin must be close by! And my fall must have frightened him into thinking I was some sort of a wild beast of the forest. I took a step forward to call out the lad's name but fell a second time, rolling down a short hill, crunching the fallen leaves beneath me. As I sat up, rubbing my head I heard the voice again, now high pitched and panicky.

"Mama? Mama!!"

It sounded like him alright. Wasting no time, I got to my feet and headed towards his screeching cries, calling to him. Pippin went quiet when he heard my voice. "Pippin, keep shouting! I can't find you if you're quiet!"

"Mer!" cried Pippin.

Squinting in the dark, I looked down where I thought I heard the sound come from. "Pippin?" Sure enough, something small wrapped itself around my knees tightly, sniffling and shivering.

"Hide-and-seek bad!" he sobbed, clinging to me as tightly as he could. "I want Mama, Mer!"

"I'm glad I found you!" I exclaimed, prying the lad off of my legs and taking him into my arms. He felt cold and damp. "I'm so sorry I left you out here..."

"I sorry too," said Pippin, "I can't find you..."

"Pippin, I have a confession to make," I said. "I took you out here on purpose and didn't want to come back for you. I'm sorry."

"No..." insisted Pippin. "Mer good to me. I'm bad at game." I sighed, feeling Pippin rest his head on my shoulder. He either was not understanding what I was saying or he was refusing to accept what I had done. I remembered telling myself Pippin understood a lot more than he led on to. So that was how it was. He didn't want to accept the fact that I had tried to abandon him out here. "Mer, I'm hungry."

Pippin snapped me back out of my thoughts. I suddenly remembered just how hungry I was feeling myself. Worst of all, I didn't know the way out of this forest. I could spend hours wandering around in the dark and never find my way out. Still, I had to at least try.

"This is hopeless!" I sighed exasperatedly after some time. My feet we beginning to tire from the walking. I didn't think I had gone very far, having to make my way through the trees very slowly so as to not walk into anything or trip. Pippin had started whimpering again and crying softly for his mother.

See where your jealousy has gotten you, Merry? I lecture myself angrily. Now you shall never find your way home for supper! I frowned in the dark. I was a horrible cousin and a wicked hobbit. Mum would surly send me to live in Bree for this. That is, if I ever found my way home again.

Eventually, I could walk no more and sat down, feeling my back rest against the trunk of a great thick tree. I felt Pippin relax his grip on my shirt and lift his head to try and look around. All the best of luck to him, everything was black.

"Why did we stop, Mer?" he asked. "Not home yet."

"Pippin, I can't see the way home," I explained. "Dad and Uncle Paladin are out looking for you though. If we stay put maybe they'll find us."

"I want to go home," whispered Pippin, shivering. Autumn nights were not a good time for hobbits to be out in the open air. Especially the small ones. I pulled Pippin closer to try and warm him. "There are monsters in here, Mer. I don't like monsters."

"Neither do I," I said, resting my chin on the top of his head. "But don't worry. Nothing will get us because they can't see us."

"You'll hear them coming, right?"

"Of course I will." I wished those words had worked on myself as well as Pippin. I had to be the braver of us two but I kept having fleeting thoughts that just off to the side there would be some sort of a beast lurking, waiting to pounce on me when the time was right. I could not see. I was blind in the dark and it frightened me.

Pippin eventually grew still, having fallen asleep. I let my mind wander back home, to where fires roared in the hearths of Brandy Hall. Back where my warm bed was. Where the cook worked in the kitchen, preparing delicious treats for all occasions. But I was out here, in the dark of the Old Forest, shaded from the moonlight under the tall boughs of the old trees. I wanted to go home now. I wanted to curl up in my own mother's arms where it was warm and safe. But I was stuck here... lost with no way to get home...