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Char is the shit.

Reviewers:

The Demonic Duo- don't give up hope! I'm sorry! Never give up, never surrender! (okay, ignore that.) But seriously, please don't abandon this story, I will keep writing!

Flame Rhiannon- it's all good, I know how siblings can be *growl* selfish little punks! Lol. Glad to see you again (well, see your name…) Hope this chapter is just as good as you seem to think the rest of the story is…oh, and look for your 'line' in the story.

Lily Bell- thank you kindly!

A.L. Lorraine- I'm glad you like it! Ah, the poetry…you'll see! Thanks for reviewing!

madcornfan- ok! Bye!

Chloe-Wagner- will try dear! Yeah, it would have been good, actually...oh well, a little too late now

freakyfairy- lovely to see you!

Monica-Chan- that is an awful lot of reallys! I feel so loved! I will try to write more!

Chapter 7: Tainted

Refresher from the previous chapter:

They managed to travel the rest of the way to the Headmaster's office without mishap, and silence pervaded as Sirius delivered three heavy knocks to the thick oaken wood. "Come in."

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Dumbledore, surprisingly chipper for seven in the morning, greeted his students warmly, and when the four teens explained the situation to their Headmaster (with a few snippy comments from Lily directed at James), he smiled and retold the entire story to James. As time went by, James' face went paler and paler, his eyes grew wider and wider, and his heart sank lower and lower. Remus sat quietly, more so than usual, his eyes growing misty and acquiring a faraway expression, tuning out the others as he faintly heard Lily and Sirius adding tidbits to the tale.

"And so there you have it," Dumbledore proclaimed, an hour later. "Miss Evans is Lord Voldemort's true love and has been instilled with powers beyond her control. Remus and Sirius were sworn to secrecy and have been delegated to protect her in an inconspicuous way."

"Sir, I don't understand…I mean, all the signs were there-"

Lily groaned impatiently. "How thick can you be Potter? Is it so hard for you to accept that you were wrong? It would do your inflated head some good, I should say. Poor little Potter, Evans isn't a Death Eater like he thought she was, so now he has to waste the Headmaster's time with even more foolishness because he can't come out and say, 'I, James Tristan Potter, am not always right.'"

"Miss Evans, please, Mr. Potter is of course in a bit of shock. Please do not bash him…at least, not in my presence," he added with a wink. "Now, if you four don't mind, I shall have to set up a meeting with Professor Hadley. What on earth is that woman teaching you?"

"She had all the traits," James protested weakly, looking sheepishly at Lily. "I wouldn't have- if I'd have known…"

"Potter, how is it that I keep asking you to shut your mouth and you refuse to do it?" the redhead demanded, scowling in his direction. Facing the Headmaster again, she smiled warmly. "Thank you for your time, Headmaster. Remus, Sirius, will one of you lovely gents escort me to breakfast? It's past eight and since I have to be up, I'm bloody starved."

"I'll take you Milady, I could eat the whole stock. Do you think it's possible for Gryffindor table to run out of food?" Sirius asked.

"I don't know, how many House Elves work here?" Lily replied, taking Sirius' arm and dragging him out of the office. Remus and James stayed seated, each with their own thoughts, staring off into space. Dumbledore rose from behind his desk, stretching and yawning.

"I do believe breakfast is a good idea, my lads. You are welcome to stay here until you are ready to walk down to the Great Hall." With a wave, the older man also made his way down the spinning staircase.

Silence evaded the circular office, broken moments later by James. "You've been quiet since we got here, Moony. Are you feeling okay?"

"James, list off the reasons you didn't trust Lily."

"What?"

"Don't ask, just do it," the young werewolf commanded.

"Well, she- for starters, she seemed to know far too much about us sneaking off and stuff. And, you know, the mind thing was a dead give away, and she admitted to killing other people, or so I thought. I heard her…I just- okay, so all of those aren't great excuses but-"

"You're right, they're excuses," Remus mumbled. "They mean nothing."

"Remus, what is this really about?" More silence filled Dumbledore's office. Remus continued to stare at the door to the office, away from James, and the messy haired teen couldn't see his expression. "Remus?"

The smaller boy whirled to face him, a look of betrayal and hurt shattering his delicate features. "She showed dark traits, did she?" he demanded. "That is your defense, is it not?"

"I don't need a defense. Of course, wouldn't you consider speaking mind to mind a dark trait?"

"And so because she has a dark trait, she works for Voldemort? What if she wasn't his destined, and instead was just another student, who happened to have the ability to speak Parseltongue?"

"She's a Parseltongue too? And Dumbledore believes this malarkey about being bonded with the Dark Lord?! A Parseltongue is without a doubt not to be trusted!"

"And am I not to be trusted as well?" Remus whispered brokenly, his voice barely audible, the silence itself more deafening. James recoiled as though he had been slapped, eyes wide with disbelief. "Am I also enrolled in the Dark Lord's ranks?"

"What?! Moony, how can you suggest that I- that you are- that I think…"

"Well, that's what you've been saying, isn't it? If a person exhibits dark traits within their personality, then they must be in league with Voldemort. I'm as dark as they come, James, I don't just possess dark qualities, oh no! I'm a dark creature!" the tawny-haired boy sobbed, pain and doubts, doubts in their friendship, dancing in his golden eyes.

"Remus, why are you doing this?" James rasped, feeling as though he had been stabbed through the heart.

"It's true, though, isn't it? I am just as untrustworthy, just as despicable as one of the Death Eaters. I must be on the side of the Dark because nothing as unscrupulous and low as me would fight for what is good and right." Remus' voice trembled. "I'm not pure enough. I am tainted right down to my soul. I am the lonely, the dangerous, the damned. And you know it." With that, Remus turned and stalked out of the office, leaving James horrified with self-loathing.

"Oh fuck, what have I done?"

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"Ah, Wolverine, there you are, I was wondering when you'd decide to show up," Lily chirped, chomping on a burnt slice of bacon. Catching the look on his face, she paused, mid chew, and tilted her head to the side, shooting him a curious look. He just shrugged, and waved it off for later. She nodded.

Sirius, who was having a nap on his plate, jerked to a sitting position as Remus plopped down across from Lily and him. "Ream! Uh, where's Prongs?" he asked, looking around for the other boy.

"I dunno, I left before he did. I'm sure he'll be along in a bit." And I don't want to be here when he is, he thought darkly.

Sirius scowled. "Well, damn him, I need him to get his arse here faster. I can't seem to think of one joke, one sarcastic jibe, one dirty innuendo, just because I need to make sure he's okay…so now I'm all out of witty coments thanks to him…"

What happened sweetie? Lily asked softly in his mind while Sirius rambled, trying not to pry too much. Remus drew a picture of the Shack in his mind, and then said suddenly, "I wonder if those five girls spend the same number of minutes getting ready in the morning." He gestured at a group of Hufflepuffs, and when Sirius turned to glance, looking puzzled, Remus looked at Lily and she winked. Got it.

Sirius turned his bewildered gaze to his friend. "Remus, what the bloody-"

"Never mind, Sirius, I'm off to the library. And don't come looking for me either."

"I'll meet you there in a little bit Remus," Lily announced. "Don't worry about walking me there," she added to Sirius as Remus walked away. "I'll be okay for five minutes in the halls."

"But Dumbledore said…"

"Go find Potter Snuffles, he'll need you to restore his ego to its natural size."

Before Sirius could respond, Lily was out the door and on her way to meet Remus at the shack.

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"Remus?" Lily's voice echoed in the musty air as she made her way down the narrow passageway that led from Hogwart's grounds to Hogsmeade. "Remmie, are you here?" she called again, reaching the open door that led into the basement of the Shack.

"Second floor!" came the muffled reply, and Lily cursed the dusty air as she sneezed her way up two flights of stairs. Entering the solitary bedroom that the stairs led to, she was greeted with quiet sobbing, her footsteps quickening as she made her way to the torn bedside where Remus was curled into a fetal position.

"Hey hey hey, what's all this then?" she asked softly, rubbing gently at his back. "Are you hurt Remus?"

"More than I can say," he sniffled, raising red-rimmed pools of caramel to meet her burning gaze.

"Who hurt you? Why, I swear, when I find out who did this to you, they are dead! Do you hear me, sweetheart? They don't stand a chance."

"No, Lily, really, James is already in enough trouble with you."

Lily froze. "What has that snot nosed spoiled little brat done now?" she demanded, her eyes gleaming with rage, her fists clenched at her sides. "I'll tear him limb from limb, he will never, and I mean never be able to have children ever," she vowed solemnly. "And he won't be able to ruffle his damn hair either," she added as an after thought, drawing a watery chuckle from her friend. "What did he do?" Lily asked again.

"Don't worry about it Lily. I just realized something that I had been wondering about last night. It wasn't good, but it's reality, and I'm ready to face it."

"Face what?"

He replied emotionlessly. "That I am a menace to society, and no one can ever completely trust me."

"What?!" Lily exploded. "Why in the hell do you think that, Remus J.- Oh, oh he wouldn't." She gave a harsh chuckle. "He didn't! How could he even make you think that?!"

"Lily, drop it. It doesn't matter. Facts are facts." The redhead was about to argue, and rather heatedly too, but Remus shook his head and motioned for her to be quiet. "Now, what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"I wanted to talk about?" she repeated, momentarily confused. Then, suddenly the light blinked on and she shifted gears, dropping the other topic. For now. Boy is Potter going to get it. I'll teach him to hurt Remus like that! "Oh! Oh, yeah, that's right. Oh man," she chewed her lip, feeling awkward. Lily hadn't thought about what she was actually going to say.

"Lil?"

"Right, um, well, is there something that's been bothering you these past couple of weeks? It's just, you've seemed kind of out of it and I want to help you out…"

"Something bothering me?" Remus squeaked out, looking very afraid. "N-no, I can't say anything's been out of the ordinary," he managed, while thinking, Nope, being in love with your platonic male best friend is perfectly normal.

"Damn it, Remus, you know I'm not tactful, why don't you just say it?! You're in love with Sirius rotting Black!" Remus froze in shock, as did Lily who was looking appalled, her hands clamped to her mouth as though that would take back what she said.

"I- I'm not…what makes you think I'm- that is to say…oh, bleeding dickens, is it that obvious?" Remus demanded, petrified. Does everyone know? Does Sirius know? What is Lily going to say? Say something!

"Remus, calm down," Lily soothed.

"But Padfoot could know! What am I going to do? That must be what he meant earlier when he encouraged me to comfort Veronica. He wanted to get me out of the way so he shoved me towards the closest available girl so I'd fall for her! As if I could! She's the wrong gender, for one thing-" he wailed, ranting blindly as his stomach filled with dread.

"Shh! Remus, chill out! Breathe in, breathe out, in and out… it's not noticeable, okay? I knew something had been on your mind for the past couple of weeks, but I never guessed…until last night, that is."

"Do you think anyone else knows?" he wondered, licking his lips nervously.

"Not really. You actually hide it very well, did you know?"

"I've always been one for keeping secrets," he replied softly, looking perplexed. "How did you figure it out then?"

"Oh, well, you had just told Sirius he was brilliant, and you actually meant it? I mean, it must be love because that is the only thing that could make you that blind!" she joked. Remus cracked a grin, but managed to be indignant for Sirius' part.

"He is brilliant," he said.

"There you go again! Definitely something in the air…or maybe it's the water."

"Shut up, I know you like James!" he teased, watching her go beet red.

"Liked!" she hissed, looking mortified. "Liked! Not like!"

"Oh come on, Lily, of course you're pissed at him, but you don't have a crush on somebody for, oh, five years, and then suddenly drop it because you realize they can be dense every now and then. If that were true, I'd have stopped liking Snuffles long ago."

"But, Remus- it's not that he accused me of being a Death Eater," Lily protested.

"Oh?" he asked, eyebrow raised.

"Oh. It's-" she resumed chewing her lip, looking tormented. "It was just…last night, when he found me by the fire, he was cruel. He was trying to hurt me, he was baiting me on purpose…I didn't know he had it in him to be so malicious."

"Everyone has a darker side to them," Remus replied gently, trying to soothe her as she had soothed him. "And, you might as well know…when James was six he watched Voldemort torture and kill both of his parents from a closet in their bedroom." Lily gasped in horror. She couldn't imagine what that must have felt like for a boy so young. "He's bent on bringing the Dark Lord down…don't you understand? That's why he hates Slytherin so much. As prejudice as it is, that house embodies everything he has ever wanted to destroy. And yesterday afternoon, by the tree? James was dazzled by you, he was fast on the way to developing a crush, I daresay- and then he 'found out' you were a Death Eater. And he flipped."

"Oh, god, that's…that's so sad. I can't even pretend to know how he feels-"

"He doesn't want anyone to know, because he's afraid they'll pity him. Don't say anything, Lily."

"I won't," she promised, giving the werewolf a grateful hug. "I swear it on my life."

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And that is chapter seven. Thank you for reading.

Kisses,

Crys