Hi y'all...lol. I'm back for now. I'll post a story...wee..! enthusiasm!
That's rare. Oh, well...HERE GOES:
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Disclaimer: as you all may know Miss Sly (me) doesn't own any of the J.K. Rowling stuff. That includes the characters, the settings, and exedra.
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* I dream of Genie - music plays *
Announcer - Weeeeelllllccccomee to The Harry! Potter! Dating! Game!!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Announcer -HEEEEEEEEERE'S your host! SLY! FIDELTE!
Live audience - *claps and cheers louder*
Sly - Hello folks! Today we have some very special -
Draco - Why is the show called "The Harry Potter Dating game", when Potter isn't even here? Is he lurking somewhere? *looks around in paranoid fashion*
Sly - *in an irritated voice* Stay behind the screen!
Draco - And why is Lockhart -
Sly - *rolls eyes* STUPIFY!
Draco - *falls*
Sly - As I was saying, -
Lockhart - Can I Lick You? o_O
Sly - *mutters* they don't pay me enough to do this.ARG! * Pushes Lockhart off of lap*
Lockhart - *on the floor* hee, hee, hee,.
Sly - *massages temples* Moving on. Today we have a very special show planned. Our lucky bachelor is -
Announcer - out cold.
Sly - Pardon?
Announcer - you stunned him.
Sly - Ahhh.
Director - CUT! Bunny! Roll a commercial
Bunny - squeak!
---------Commercial------
*Man playing piano*
And now for something completely different:
Penguin - *runs around in circles* squawk!
Elephant - *squishes penguin*
Penguin - x__x
---------End Commercial------
Director- Bunny! Is he awake?
Bunny - squeak!
Director - But What does it all mean?!
Bunny - squeak!
Director - ah..
Draco - *stirs*
Sly - Finally.
Draco - *looks dazed and confused* Wh.where am I?
Sly - Here.
Draco - .
Sly - Any ways.. Our lucky bachelor for today is DRACO MALFOY!
Draco - WHAT?!?!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Draco - ?!!?
Sly - Alright then *said in false cheery voice* Lets see who we've -
Announcer - And that's all we have time for today! Tune in next time. Same Dating Game time, same Dating Game channel!
Sly -But-!
Camera -*is off*
Sly - *curses*
Lockhart - Do you want my autograph? I've learned joined-up writing you know!
~~~~ Sly - are you going to cooperate?
Draco - *is bound and gagged* yef!*in a muffled voice*
Sly - what was that?
Draco - Grrr.
Sly - oh fine . just let me ..
Director - you do know you're on the air.
Sly - O_O
Draco - @#$! %+ * &%$!!!
Sly - Language, Draco! Language!
Director - Bring out the contestants and get a blindfold on him..
Sly - er.I used it to gag him.
Director -so take it off *walks over to Draco to un-gag him*
Sly - I wouldn't do that if I were-
Draco - *bellows* MOTHER F****R! @#$! %+ * &%$!!! WHEN MY FATHER HEARS ABOUT THIS HE'LL-
Director - *gags Draco* Why didn't you warn me?
Sly - I did.
Director - try harder next time.
Sly - anyway.our contestants are competing for a date with Draco, 1501 galleons, and Draco's broom!
Draco - *is still gagged * WTF?!?
Sly - Yes, Draco.I know your excited.
Draco - *Glares*
Sly - Anyways. Lets introduce contestant number one!!!!
A screen is lit up and you can see a women's profile behind it.
Sly - Jennifer, Why don't you tell us about yourself...
Jennifer - You can call me jenny Draco...
Draco -*mutters incoherently*
Jennifer - I have brown eyes, neutral blond hair (really light brown), I'm 5'7, I'm 15, and I'm really fun to be around with, I make friends really easily, I'm really nice and...
Draco -*is interested*
Sly - MOVING ON!!
Jennifer - OH NO B*TC#! You DID NOT just cut me off! You're shagging Draco aren't you?!
Sly - *tosses clip board aside* YOU WANT SOME OF THIS!?
Jennifer - BRING IT ON!!!!
Sly and Jennifer - *Cat fight*
Director - *sighs* Bunny...
Bunny - SQUEAK!
Director - Roll a commercial...
Bunny - Squeak...
----Commercial----
Fred - I wish I had some candied yams.
George - Me too!
Ron - Me three!
Ginny - Well wish no more brothers mine! We'll just pop down to Yams for less! 0.5 APR on your first purchase!
Fred, George, and Ron - YAY!
Fred, George, Ron, and Ginny -
Yams for less
Yams for less
Makes it oh so nice to say tuck in!
----End of Commercial----
Sly -*in a corner* hiss!
Jennifer - *behind a screen* Bite me!
Draco - gladly *winks*
Sly - *cracks a whip at Draco* Back!
Jennifer - Hey! ~~~~ Director -and We're on in 5
Draco - Remind me why I have to be here.
Director - 4
Sly - because if you leave then I get to keep your man hood and feed it to my thestral, Jub-Jub.
Director -3
Jub-Jub - Licks "lips"
Draco -*squeaks in fear*
Director -2,1
* I dream of Genie - music plays *
Announcer - Weeeeelllllccccomee to The Harry! Potter! Dating! Game!!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Announcer -HEEEEEEEEERE'S your host! SLY! FIDELTE!
Live audience - *claps and cheers louder*
Sly - Hello folks! Today we are going to introduce contestant number two and three!
Audience - *is silent*
Sly - *in demon voice* CLAP!
Audience - claps
Sly - *in game show host voice* Okay, contestant number two!
Screen is lit up and a woman's profile is shown
Sly - contestant number two! Why don't you tell us a bit about your self?
Contestant Number Two - Erm...okay. I've love books, schoolwork, my friends, especially Ron Wea- oops.cans you edit that part out?
Sly - er...sure *looks dodgy*
Contestant Number Two - Right, I have brown hair.it's kind of.erm.what's the word?
Sly - Big?
Contestant Number Two - NO!
Draco - *looks at camera* I wonder who it could be!*is serious*
Sly - thank you Her- Contestant Cumber Two.
Audience- *claps*
Teen age boy in audience - I WANNA SEE SOME SEX AND VIOLENCE!!!
Audience - *agrees*
Sly -*rolls eyes*
----comercial----
CHILDREN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.
GIRL:
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.
CHILDREN:
Every sperm is wanted.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighborhood.
-----end of commercial-----
Sly- Bunny! What was that all about.
Bunny- *squeaks and shrugs*
Sly - anyway contestant number three!
Screen lights up and a mans profile is shown
Draco -WTF?!
Sly - Jub-Jub!
Jub-Jub - *licks "lips"
Draco - *squeaks in fear*
Sly - contestant number three! Tell us about your self.
Contestant number three - Okay! I like signing things now that I've learned joined-up letters.I'm the most handsome man on earth.
Draco - Pft!
Contestant number three - OH! And my current place of residents is that nice room with the padded walls, in this place called St. something or other.
Sly - *giggles*
Draco -*looks mutinous*
Announcer - And that's all we have time for today! Tune in next time. Same Dating Game time, same Dating Game channel!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Disclaimer: as you all may know Miss Sly (me) doesn't own any of the J.K. Rowling stuff. That includes the characters, the settings, and exedra.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
* I dream of Genie - music plays *
Announcer - Weeeeelllllccccomee to The Harry! Potter! Dating! Game!!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Announcer -HEEEEEEEEERE'S your host! SLY! FIDELTE!
Live audience - *claps and cheers louder*
Sly - Hello folks! Today we have some very special -
Draco - Why is the show called "The Harry Potter Dating game", when Potter isn't even here? Is he lurking somewhere? *looks around in paranoid fashion*
Sly - *in an irritated voice* Stay behind the screen!
Draco - And why is Lockhart -
Sly - *rolls eyes* STUPIFY!
Draco - *falls*
Sly - As I was saying, -
Lockhart - Can I Lick You? o_O
Sly - *mutters* they don't pay me enough to do this.ARG! * Pushes Lockhart off of lap*
Lockhart - *on the floor* hee, hee, hee,.
Sly - *massages temples* Moving on. Today we have a very special show planned. Our lucky bachelor is -
Announcer - out cold.
Sly - Pardon?
Announcer - you stunned him.
Sly - Ahhh.
Director - CUT! Bunny! Roll a commercial
Bunny - squeak!
---------Commercial------
*Man playing piano*
And now for something completely different:
Penguin - *runs around in circles* squawk!
Elephant - *squishes penguin*
Penguin - x__x
---------End Commercial------
Director- Bunny! Is he awake?
Bunny - squeak!
Director - But What does it all mean?!
Bunny - squeak!
Director - ah..
Draco - *stirs*
Sly - Finally.
Draco - *looks dazed and confused* Wh.where am I?
Sly - Here.
Draco - .
Sly - Any ways.. Our lucky bachelor for today is DRACO MALFOY!
Draco - WHAT?!?!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Draco - ?!!?
Sly - Alright then *said in false cheery voice* Lets see who we've -
Announcer - And that's all we have time for today! Tune in next time. Same Dating Game time, same Dating Game channel!
Sly -But-!
Camera -*is off*
Sly - *curses*
Lockhart - Do you want my autograph? I've learned joined-up writing you know!
~~~~ Sly - are you going to cooperate?
Draco - *is bound and gagged* yef!*in a muffled voice*
Sly - what was that?
Draco - Grrr.
Sly - oh fine . just let me ..
Director - you do know you're on the air.
Sly - O_O
Draco - @#$! %+ * &%$!!!
Sly - Language, Draco! Language!
Director - Bring out the contestants and get a blindfold on him..
Sly - er.I used it to gag him.
Director -so take it off *walks over to Draco to un-gag him*
Sly - I wouldn't do that if I were-
Draco - *bellows* MOTHER F****R! @#$! %+ * &%$!!! WHEN MY FATHER HEARS ABOUT THIS HE'LL-
Director - *gags Draco* Why didn't you warn me?
Sly - I did.
Director - try harder next time.
Sly - anyway.our contestants are competing for a date with Draco, 1501 galleons, and Draco's broom!
Draco - *is still gagged * WTF?!?
Sly - Yes, Draco.I know your excited.
Draco - *Glares*
Sly - Anyways. Lets introduce contestant number one!!!!
A screen is lit up and you can see a women's profile behind it.
Sly - Jennifer, Why don't you tell us about yourself...
Jennifer - You can call me jenny Draco...
Draco -*mutters incoherently*
Jennifer - I have brown eyes, neutral blond hair (really light brown), I'm 5'7, I'm 15, and I'm really fun to be around with, I make friends really easily, I'm really nice and...
Draco -*is interested*
Sly - MOVING ON!!
Jennifer - OH NO B*TC#! You DID NOT just cut me off! You're shagging Draco aren't you?!
Sly - *tosses clip board aside* YOU WANT SOME OF THIS!?
Jennifer - BRING IT ON!!!!
Sly and Jennifer - *Cat fight*
Director - *sighs* Bunny...
Bunny - SQUEAK!
Director - Roll a commercial...
Bunny - Squeak...
----Commercial----
Fred - I wish I had some candied yams.
George - Me too!
Ron - Me three!
Ginny - Well wish no more brothers mine! We'll just pop down to Yams for less! 0.5 APR on your first purchase!
Fred, George, and Ron - YAY!
Fred, George, Ron, and Ginny -
Yams for less
Yams for less
Makes it oh so nice to say tuck in!
----End of Commercial----
Sly -*in a corner* hiss!
Jennifer - *behind a screen* Bite me!
Draco - gladly *winks*
Sly - *cracks a whip at Draco* Back!
Jennifer - Hey! ~~~~ Director -and We're on in 5
Draco - Remind me why I have to be here.
Director - 4
Sly - because if you leave then I get to keep your man hood and feed it to my thestral, Jub-Jub.
Director -3
Jub-Jub - Licks "lips"
Draco -*squeaks in fear*
Director -2,1
* I dream of Genie - music plays *
Announcer - Weeeeelllllccccomee to The Harry! Potter! Dating! Game!!
Live audience - *claps and cheers*
Announcer -HEEEEEEEEERE'S your host! SLY! FIDELTE!
Live audience - *claps and cheers louder*
Sly - Hello folks! Today we are going to introduce contestant number two and three!
Audience - *is silent*
Sly - *in demon voice* CLAP!
Audience - claps
Sly - *in game show host voice* Okay, contestant number two!
Screen is lit up and a woman's profile is shown
Sly - contestant number two! Why don't you tell us a bit about your self?
Contestant Number Two - Erm...okay. I've love books, schoolwork, my friends, especially Ron Wea- oops.cans you edit that part out?
Sly - er...sure *looks dodgy*
Contestant Number Two - Right, I have brown hair.it's kind of.erm.what's the word?
Sly - Big?
Contestant Number Two - NO!
Draco - *looks at camera* I wonder who it could be!*is serious*
Sly - thank you Her- Contestant Cumber Two.
Audience- *claps*
Teen age boy in audience - I WANNA SEE SOME SEX AND VIOLENCE!!!
Audience - *agrees*
Sly -*rolls eyes*
----comercial----
CHILDREN:
Every sperm is sacred.
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.
GIRL:
Let the heathen spill theirs
On the dusty ground.
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.
CHILDREN:
Every sperm is wanted.
Every sperm is good.
Every sperm is needed
In your neighborhood.
-----end of commercial-----
Sly- Bunny! What was that all about.
Bunny- *squeaks and shrugs*
Sly - anyway contestant number three!
Screen lights up and a mans profile is shown
Draco -WTF?!
Sly - Jub-Jub!
Jub-Jub - *licks "lips"
Draco - *squeaks in fear*
Sly - contestant number three! Tell us about your self.
Contestant number three - Okay! I like signing things now that I've learned joined-up letters.I'm the most handsome man on earth.
Draco - Pft!
Contestant number three - OH! And my current place of residents is that nice room with the padded walls, in this place called St. something or other.
Sly - *giggles*
Draco -*looks mutinous*
Announcer - And that's all we have time for today! Tune in next time. Same Dating Game time, same Dating Game channel!