Author name: Ruskbyte
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Author's Note: A short apology beforehand, but this is going to be a rather bland and less than ultimately evil chapter. It's mostly introspective (sort of) and primarily a stepping stone between chapters three and five. Expect things to kick into high gear after this.
***
Chapter Four
~ Eye of the Needle ~
Hogwarts.
Looks so small from up here.
It is small.
Like a stamp.
I want to smack it with postage cancelled.
Actually, everything looks small from up here. I can't even see the people on the ground, I'm so high up. They don't even look like ants. Pity. If they did I'd be tempted to step on them. No, they don't look like ants. Smaller. Dust mites. Dust. Useless. Worthless. Pointless. They are nothing to me. Less than nothing.
Yet I want to walk amongst them.
Not because I'm lonely or yearn for companionship. Quite the contrary. I hate them. I despise them with everything that I am. Everything that I was. Everything that they have made me become. Everything that I will be. I hate them and that is why I wish to be in their midst. I want them to see what they have done to me. I want to see them realize that they were the ones that melded me into what I am. I want to see them realize that I came back to repay them in kind for what they did to me.
I want their fear. I want to see it. I want to smell it. To taste it. Hear it. Feel it.
I want to become their fear.
After blowing those five Aurors' heads off, I think I'm getting off to a good start.
That and creating this tower have managed to give the townsfolk of Hogsmeade, and those brats at Hogwarts, a thus far healthy fear of me. Truth be told, I think they're more impressed with the tower than they are the decapitated Aurors. After all, this is a time of war. Death, carnage and slaughter have become familiar faces to them. I'll show them a new face to hide from.
Yes, death is commonplace now. Nothing to get excited over.
Conjuring up a mile-high tower with a thought... now that's something to talk about.
This tower is a mile high. I think. I haven't exactly taken a yardstick and checked, but if there's one thing I've discovered about my power, it's that it takes things very literally. I want a mile-high tower, even if the dimension is only subconscious, then that's exactly what I get. It's only a couple of yards across, on the outside, but it is a mile high. I think.
That's something I've always liked about magic. That appearances can be so deceiving. A mile high tower that's a yard or two on the outside, a hundred or more on the inside. Deceptive that. By its apparent internal volume I think my tower's bigger than Hogwarts. They really shouldn't take my accomplishment at face value. Pity I didn't realize that applied to people as well as rooms and buildings. Like my so-called friends. I thought they'd always be there for me. I thought I could trust them. I thought I could love them. Love.
I no longer remember the meaning of that word.
It doesn't matter.
I don't need love anymore.
I don't want it.
I have something better.
Power.
I can do anything.
Anything at all.
Almost.
I can raise mountains with the slightest gesture.
But I can't get rid of this bloody scar.
I can level those same mountains in an eye blink.
But I can't raise the dead.
I know.
I tried.
Cedric.
Sirius.
Hagrid.
Conclusive proof, I think, that the universe still hates me.
Or is continuing to play with me, like a cat with a mouse.
The universe had better watch out if it thinks it can do that.
Cornered mice have a habit of pulling giant mallets out of the most unlikely places.
And my mallet is bigger than any other.
I wish I had some binoculars. Hermione used to watch my Quidditch matches through binoculars. I don't plan on watching Quidditch. I'm more interested in seeing what the assholes at the foot of my tower are trying today.
It's been nearly a month since I arrived at Hogwarts. A month since I revealed myself to that old bastard and the rest of my betrayers. At least those who were there. McGonagall. Snape. Snape... I wonder if they've managed to move him yet. I told him to shut up and stay right where he was. My magic --power-- is different to what they taught at Hogwarts. I ask and I receive. I want and I obtain. I will and it is done. I believe they will have no more luck moving that bastard than they have had luck getting inside my tower.
It's been nearly a month since I created this tower. I think I'll call it The Needle, 'cause it must certainly resemble one. A mile high, a couple of yards thick, and made from some shiny material that is as immutable as my hatred. My need for vengeance. I would call it The Wand, but that would only remind me that I haven't had my own "wand" serviced by some tight, hot, wet, little Muggle bitch since I made my return.
I suppose I'll simply have to find a tight, hot, wet, little witch bitch that I can bend over and help myself to.
Preferably one of those whores that betrayed me.
Not McGonagall.
Don't want to imagine that.
Tonks.
Luna.
Ginny.
Hermione.
Hermione.
Yes...
Yes.
I think I'll visit her... second. After.
Yes.
Second.
Or fourth, if you look at it that way.
Family before friends, after all.
Yes.
"Harry Potter, sir?"
Ah, my hired help.
I don't know why I was surprised when Dobby turned up the morning after I arrived here. I should have known he'd never believe I was guilty. Even though he was free, and employed by that old bastard, he somehow considers me to be his master. Probably the only person in the world that was happy to hear of my return. More than happy. Delighted. Ecstatic. Hell, I thought he was going to cum, he was so excited when he Apparated into my bedroom.
Scared me shitless.
I was expecting an army of Aurors or Death Eaters or both to start Apparating into the Needle at any second. I'd created nearly a hundred... I don't know what they are exactly. Or what to call them. They're certainly big mother fuckers though. Look sort of like a cross between a medieval suit of armour and something out of Star Wars. Ten foot tall and each with enough raw magic and hi-tech gizmos to level Hogsmeade twice. Haven't a clue how they work either, but I've placed five of them on every floor of the Needle now. That's eight hundred of the bloody things. An army. My army. Haven't tested them in battle yet, but I bet they'll be almost unstoppable.
I had willed nearly a hundred of the bloody things into existence before Dobby managed to calm me --and by proxy himself-- down. To my relief I learnt that none of the witches or wizards outside have been able to Apparate inside the Needle. They'd been trying from almost the minute I'd created it. Dobby had only been able to Apparate inside because he was a house-elf and uses a different kind of magic. I fixed that now. Nothing can enter the Needle without my permission. Not house-elves. Not owls. Not cats. Not snakes. Not even bacteria. Nothing.
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thud*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thunk*
Sigh.
Seems the crazy twit's punishing himself for disturbing me. Must've taken my lack of a prompt reply as a censure of sorts. Some things never change, I suppose. Pathetic really. Not that I'm one to talk. After all, I used to beat myself up (though not physically) when I still cared about what people thought. When I was worried about their opinions of me. Not any more. Not ever again.
I'll try and wean Dobby off this habit of self-flagellation.
"Bad Dobby!"
*thunk*
"Bad Dobby!"
*thunk*
It's going to take some work and a lot of time.
"Stop head butting my desk, Dobby," I finally say.
"Thank you, Harry Potter, sir. Sorry, Harry Potter, sir."
I think he must be seeing double. Maybe even triple or more. His eyes are definitely a little glazed over. I think about moving to support him as he sways there in front of me, staring up at me with those great big eyes of his. Tennis ball eyes. Never played tennis. I don't move. He wouldn't appreciate my attempting to help him. Protested whenever I tried when I was still in school. Don't think that's changed either. In a way I'm relieved. I hate physical contact.
Sounds hypocritical, doesn't it?
I abhor being touched, yet I spent the three months before coming here indulging in an orgy of physical pleasure. I don't understand it myself --not that I want to-- but that's how it is. I never found comfort in the arms of those girls and women I slept with. Comfort? I've never known it. Not really. I thought I did. Once. At Hogwarts. With Hermione.
She scarred me.
The three parallel slashes across my cheek tingle with the memory.
No, I didn't fuck those girls so that I could lie comfortably in their sweet embrace -- sweet embrace? Gods, I'm sounding so clichéd. It was pleasure. My pleasure. I screwed their brains out because I wanted to get my rocks off. That rock. Azkaban. My very own private hell for three years. Three lifetimes. Three eternities. Longer even. And shorter. My perception of time is different from what it used to be. Bursts of speed where everything seems to happen all at once. Periods of stillness where life seems like an underwater ballet.
Perhaps it's just a shift in my perception of the universe. Or maybe I can actually control the flow of time itself. Not that I need to of course. But it is an added bonus. One of the changes I've been through since my... rebirth, as it were. There've been a lot of changes. The way I act, the way I see things, the way I think. Guess I shouldn't be surprised by the last one. Years of Dementor induced insanity would change the way anyone thinks.
Just look at what those accursed things did to Sirius when he was there.
Course, he was always a bit off. Him and Dad. And the other two. They'll get theirs, those two. Mark my words they will. Wormtail that filthy rat traitor. Literally. And the werewolf. They will meet their fate at my hand, the both of them. Sirius never betrayed me. Nor did Dad. Unless you take into account the fact that they got themselves killed... leaving me alone. If Sirius had still been alive I'd bet all the gold in Gringotts that he'd have come after me. Gotten me out of Azkaban, regardless of the risk. Regardless of whether or not the attempt would've killed him.
Like it did at the Ministry.
My own damn stupid fault that was. A mistake. One that I most certainly won't be making again. Not that I could really. Sirius died because he came charging in like some deranged knight in shining armour. He was deranged, y'know. Had to be. And my father with him. I mean, really...
Padfoot?
Prongs?
Bonkers, the both of them. Even if they were only a pair of schoolboys.
But it won't happen again. Nobody's left that cares enough to try and rescue me from anything, let alone a life threatening situation. They abandoned me to hell. Condemned me to it really. I seriously doubt they would risk their lives on my behalf after having done something like that.
"What did you want to speak with me about, Dobby?"
"Dobby had served Harry Potter's breakfast in the dining hall, Harry Potter, sir."
Practically swooning with enthusiasm.
Bouncing up and down so eagerly.
I resist the temptation to sigh.
"Thank you, Dobby. Let's go then, shall we?"
I turn away from the small balcony I've been standing on. Here on the top floor of the Needle. Best view of Hogwarts from here. The place in my private chambers, which occupy this entire level, that looks down onto the world outside. A world I have come to abhor.
"Don't disappear, just yet, Dobby."
I could feel that he was preparing to leave.
House-elf magic is different from wizard magic.
But I can feel it --sense it-- just as easily.
Over the past month I've learned to read it too.
"There's something I want to talk to you about."
"Has Dobby done something wrong, Harry Potter, sir?"
Harry Potter, sir.
I'm going to get him to call me just plain Harry, or at least just plain sir, even if it kills one of us. Probably him, since I'm pretty sure nothing on this earth could kill me any more even if they tried. Hard. I must admit though, it would be fun. Seeing them try that is. Voldemort. Dumbledore. The Ministry. I think I'll enjoy playing with them. It's about time the tables were turned and for once I can be the one that does the manipulating.
Hmm. I better answer before Dobby starts bashing his head against something again.
"Actually, Dobby, I want to discuss your wages."
"Dobby's wages, Harry Potter, sir?"
He looks so surprised.
I look at him with exaggerated incredulousness.
"Of course, Dobby. You can't honestly believe I expect you to wait on me hand and foot without some compensation. In fact, I already feel positively guilt that we haven't addressed this sooner. You've been in my employ, such as it is, for nearly a month now."
"Harry Potter, sir, is most gracious. Dobby does not need to be paid."
I swear he's blushing.
"We can discuss it after breakfast."
Almost at the table. He's outdone himself once again. Even when I was at Hogwarts...
"In the meanwhile, Dobby, I have another job for you to do."
He's bouncing up and down again. So eager to serve. So eager to please. Just as I was. Just as I will never be again. I smile wistfully. "There's a note that I need you to deliver. I'd like you to hand it personally to Professor Dumbledore. And while you're at Hogwarts, you can inform the headmaster that you are no longer in his employ, but mine instead."
"Yes sir, Harry Potter, sir."
The note appears in my hand. It's exactly as I imagined it. Exactly as I wanted it. I unfold it briefly to check. Just in case. Yes. Exactly. I hand it to Dobby and he disappears with a crack. The only creature, other than myself, who can come and go as he pleases through the Needle's protective barriers. A part of me wishes I had gone with him. Just to see the look on old man Dumbledore's face when he reads that note.
Just thought I'd let you know; I intend to finish what Hagrid started nine years ago.
I wonder if he'll be able to work it out quickly enough to try and save them.
Don't really care.
He can't save them.
Nobody can.
Mmmm, I wish I knew how Dobby makes these eggs so perfect. And the toast... such a wonder golden brown and just the right crispiness.
I'll finish breakfast. Give Dumbledore a little time. After all, the game's not fun unless some challenge is presented to the players. My revenge will be much more satisfying if I have to put a little more effort into it. Not that I put much effort into anything these days.
Still... I'll finish breakfast. Give Dumbledore and his feeble Order of the Phoenix a bit of a head start. Then, for the first time in a month, for the first time since creating this tower, I'll be going back out in to the world.
It's been a long time since I was in Surrey.
Time to pay a visit.
TBC...
Blue Roses2 - Everyone's going to be downright terrified of Harry before he's through with them.
Sparks - Oh, there's nothing plain about my evil.
Ravel Puzzlewell - We'll be seeing how good my juggling skills are pretty soon, because I still plan to begin posting Shattering of Soul come the beginning of December.
Anon - Nothing guilty about it.
oybolshoi - Harry's not going to be redeemed by the story's end, though I do intend for him to find some measure of peace (at least with himself). Basically he's going to move on after doling out his vengence upon everyone.
Mikito - Thanks.
mashimaromadness - The body count is going to start rising as of the next chapter.
Calex - Just wait till Harry starts paying visits to all of his old "friends".
Duckie - Thank you.
Mage of Shadows - Sadly I've been unable to find any copies of hte "Wheel of Time" series, though several people here at ff.net have recommended it to me.
Celtic Ember - I try.
Slimpun - Not yet, I don't think.
Swords of Chaos - Being as uninhibited as he is might be the reason for that.
Anemosys - With luck it shall be.
Saerry Snape - Harry's thoughts will tend to settle down when he's calmer or alone, but expect him to become very erract at times.
BloodLust Vampire - I think you'll be doubting the existence of any humanity left in Harry before long.
gaul1 - Will do.
Shadow Wolf0987 - Thanks.
miles militis ab perditio - Yep, those are two of the clues as to how and why Harry ended up in Azkaban.
Teresina Dragonwagon - Glad to hear it.
CelticKnight - I'll keep that in mind. I have one or two ideas I might like to try.
Helen - Thank you very much.
Viva - Harry's definitely going to be prone to giving into his base urges in this fic.
Black Rose9 - Voldie is still around and Harry will be paying him a visit soon.
Cr1Ms0n^D3v1L - It's fun to write too. I get to indulge myself.
The Keymaker - Probably not, in the end, but only time will tell.
Potato Chippy Weezer - Exactly what I was aiming for. Deliciously evil.
BlackDiva - Harry will be confronting Hermione in chapter six and Ron several chapters after that.
dementorchic - Black humour. Gotta love it.
sabotage3p3 - Not entirely written out, but lots of little bits scattered along the way.
Ankalagon - I'm certain Harry won't have any romantic interest in characters that he knew before being sent to Azkaban, even someone like Sinistra that he never really got to know. He's not likely to trust anyone that was at Hogwarts at the time enough for that.
X a r a l i n d - Yep, definitely round the bend.
LordKazzeem - Quite the contrary. The bit with Albus and Poppy is only the start of the very intricate plot I've come up with to explain Harry's incarceration. Rest assured he was sent to Azkaban and his friend were the ones that sent him there.
Elves - Thank you.
katrina - I don't know if he'll be dancing down any streets, but Harry will be having his whimsical moments.
Angelis1 - He's going to kill quite a few people, but probably not everyone. He'd prefer they suffer instead.
Sailor Sol - Thanks.
Sharker11 - I don't know that any non-insane person would forgive them, but they might be a bit more inclined to at least understand the circumstances surrounding the matter.
Hermpotter - I did intend for this fic to have a completely different style to the others I've written.
shreve - Thank you
CentralsPrincess15 - Neville wasn't any worse than any of the others. Harry just happened to focus on him in particular at that moment. As for the rest of you questions, those will be revealed closer to the story's end.
FroBoy - They'll figure it out pretty soon, particularly now that he's started seeking out everyone that's ever pissed him off.
Queenie2 - Well of Shadows is done, I'm afraid. Fortunately the sequel will be starting soon enough.
midnight-lord - Speaking of lemons, I've been thinking of writing a few... probably tying into my other fic; Flying Without A Broom and Backwards Compatible.
Jorj Car'Das - With luck.
Illiamwa - I'm considering it.
Angel56 - I'm currently 4th Kyu, which in Seido is a green belt. I'm going for grading to 3rd Kyu in a couple of weeks.
azntgr01 - Pleased to hear it.
mc2rpg - Definitely.
imarch4hp314 - Sadly no. The only HP/HG fic I'm writing at the moment is Backwards Compatible.
Satine Nuit - I might go back to Midnight Avatar, but since I'll soon be juggling four fics at once, it will probably only be after finishing one or two of them first.
Swimmerkitti - Draco probably won't die, but Harry will be making sure that he'll wish he had. Along with quite a few other people as well.
koosei - Just wait for the next one.
pablo5280 - Thank you.
Smells Like Slytherin Spirit - It'll have its fluff moments, but not too many of them.
Xenocide - It's going to get better.
Geor-sama - Considering the format of the fic, everything is inside Harry's head. But don't worry; I don't intend to cop out by making the whole thing a nightmare.
Kyra4 - Descriptions of the Needle will be coming in bits and pieces over the course of the fic.
vsd2oc - The Ministry will be trying to force entry in a later chapter. Expect all hell to break loose when they do. Harry's doesn't like uninvited guests.
Tillis - That it is. That it is.
RaistlinofMetallica - That pretty much describes the situation.
Lindiel Eryn - No need to worry about that. Harry doesn't want to take over the world, or kill everyone in it. He's just out for vengeance on those he believes betrayed him, after which he's going to settle down in a nice quite corner of the world and spend the rest of his days shagging any hot babes he happens across.
Fire Wings1 - Entirely through Harry's POV.
rosie - Ah! That's the interesting point. You see, everyone that was close to Harry does know that he was framed! Only they sent him to Azkaban anyway. Stay tuned to find out why and how.
OrionTheHunter - I'll try to oblige.
Calimora - The potion is important to the plot, but not with regards to Voldie.
momma-dar - I'll try to.
keebler-elmo - Detailed action coming up from the next chapter onwards.
Irish Rover - Entirely Harry's perspective.
Death's Shadow - We'll be seeing everyone's reactions to meeting Harry as the fic progresses. Some will handle it better than others.
athrun-kun - I thought about having Harry keep his true identity secret for longer, but decided that it was more in character (considering his state of mind) that he would not want to remain unknown to them.
thedarkphoenix - 'Fraid not. He's just out to kill everyone he no longer likes.
coolpadfoot - Thank you.
Dawniky - Yep. More clues along the way.