a/n: I don't own them yeah yeah yeah I wish but no ;_;what can i say?
Trouble me
It had been three weeks since the rape. I had been sitting in the same hospital bed for days on, getting finger prints removed off my skin and my most private places. I felt so invaded by nurses and Doctor's touching me in places Daisuke had never even touched me yet. My parents \
spent almost everyday with me but I was deprived of my Daisuke's comforting brown eyes. I didn't like it here. I didn't like it here at all.
I sat up and stared at the white wall diagonal from me. I felt like that wall, naked and empty. I stayed in the same place all the time and I had been there so often that people say me here as a wall, something always here. It can't be natural for a twelve year old to have this problem. To be scared of going outside, not knowing who is gonna come up on you and try to hurt you. To want to stay in the same place even though deep inside you want out so bad. Oh the trouble I feel, troubled me.
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries
Trouble me, on the days when you feel spent
Why let your shoulders bend, underneath this burden when my back in sturdy and strong
Trouble me
That night I laid slightly on my bed while my mother sat to my side and watched me like a hawk. She was always concerned about me but this, this terrible event, made her worry even more.
"Ken, honey? The nurses say you won't eat a thing? Why won't you eat? You'll feel better" She said with a concerned voice. I stayed silent, not answering my mother as I usually do. "Ken, what could I do to have you eat. Three whole days of not eating, your gonna get sick".
"I want to see Daisuke" I simply told her as I turned my back facing her. She gave a desperate sighed and pulled her chair closer to my bed.
"Maybe if it's possible, I can bring Daisuke to see you tomorrow." She suggested. My face lite up, nothing matter around me now. I was most likely going to see my Daisuke tomorrow. "On the event that you eat something" She ended.
That night I slept very well, unlike the other days of being in the hospital. I watched some television and slowly fell asleep to the sounds of television. I woke up that morning and strangely the first thing that popped into my head was the exact moments I was being raped by Osamu. I sat up immediately and looked around the room, I was ok. I shook my head as I turned around to see Daisuke right in my face. Before anything could be comprehended or said my lips were being crushed by him, gently. I had always missed him kissing me, it was so unique the way he did. I left him release me, to my great disappointment.
"Ken, you look so sick" Was the first thing he said to me as he released me from my bliss.
"Just haven't eaten a lot" I told him, turning away from him.
"Well, that kinda sucks man. Your gotta be strong for the trail" He told me as he brushed my cheek with his naked hand.
"I know but there is no point. Why do they need a trail, they got his hand prints all over my cloths and body, what more proof do they need?" I asked looking right at him.
"You don't want to be in the same room as him, do you?" He asked.
Right after he asked me that I completely broke down in his arms. I cradled myself and cried so hard. Daisuke made me break my self-embrace and slowly I put my arms around his shoulders and he wrapped his arms around my waist. He pulled me close and let me cry, to be true it felt nice to cry, I haven't for a long time. I felt his lips all over my tear-soaked face, he was perfectly gentle. I felt so troubled still, trouble me.
Speak to me
don't slip me, the call I feel means a stormy swelling
Speak to me
There's no telling when it's dark to hollowness
Speak to me
Why are you building thick, thick wall to defend me?
Speak to me
When you silence is my greatest fear?
Why let your shoulders bend, underneath this burden when my back in sturdy and strong
Trouble me
A week later my court date arrived. I was lucky to have Daisuke and my parents sitting in that courtroom for support. I don't think anyone can understand how hard it is to sit in the same room as the same person that had given you the worst torture in the world. When I saw him enter the room the first thing he did was look at me and give me that disappointed look that seemed a little too familiar for my liking. I turned back and looked at Daisuke and my parents. Daisuke gave me a faint smile while my parents gave me the most concerned look I had ever seen from them.
"Will Ken Ichijoji (a/n:sorry if I didn't spell it right ^_^') approach the stand" The judge order. I got up and sat in that small place beside the judges spot and looked at Osamu one more time.
"Please, Mr Ichijoji, tell me in your own words what happened on the night of April 27th ?" The judge asked me.
I looked out at everyone. I was so nervous, more nervous then ever before. This wasn't fair to me, I felt so wounded by what Osamu had did to me and now they put me in front of these people and order me to tell them what happened that night, if it were up to me I would run away and never want to look at any of them again! But then again what would I do without Daisuke? Or my parents? With that plain thought in mind I began to speak.
"That night, I came home from school to show Osamu my test that he had helped me study for the night before. I came out with a 78%, which wasn't my best but it was a far pass. When I showed it to me he was upset that I could only get that mark out of all that studying. He gave me and slight beating and dragged me to his bedroom" I stopped for a minute to pushed back the tears and to gather more strength. This wasn't fair to me, I was so troubled, trouble me.
Let me
have a look inside these eyes while I'm learning
Let me
please don't hide them, just because there tears
Let me
send you off to sleep with a bad, bad dream that has you turning and tossing
Let me
let me know where the hurt is and how to heal.
Spare. Spare me! Don't spare me anything! Trouble me.
I went on and on until I couldn't go on anymore. I burst out into tears and looked at Osamu again. He was furious with me, but then again he seemed to look slightly guilty, I can't tell his feelings. I drained my tears back and was about to go on but I was stopped by the judge.
"I think I've heard enough. This is truly one of the most sick and disgusting things I have ever heard. I sentence Osamu Ichijoji to fifteen years in jail, two years of parol and he will receive therapy and mental help throughout those seventeen years. Case is adjured." He hit his mallet on his desk and the case was over. I felt a sigh of relief but when I turned back to my brother, as he was carried off by two men in informs. I was sad but still relieved that he can't hurt me hurt me anymore. But I am still troubled, trouble me.
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries
Speak to me, let our words be our shelter from the storm
Let me, and lately let me know what I've command.
There's more honesty then my sweet friend, you can see. Trust is what I'm offering.
If you trouble me.
I'm still scared, but I will be alright in a while. All I know is for the next seventeen years I am out of my brother's grasp. I will be safe and maybe if I am lucky, he will never find me. If he does find me, I am looking at a life of hell. I know he the least he would do is kill me. Maybe I am worrying to much about this. I have time to do something about it, but until then I am free and safe in the arms of Daisuke and my parents.
A/n- see I make things a little better right??? There will be a next chapter but I am unsure what song I will do it with. It might take a while I have to finish 'yeah, Cody's lost it', "Tracey and Kendryn' 'Jaded' and this before I can move onto my Yolei and Ken story and my Kouichi and Izumi story. I'm trying here people -_-;;
Trouble me
It had been three weeks since the rape. I had been sitting in the same hospital bed for days on, getting finger prints removed off my skin and my most private places. I felt so invaded by nurses and Doctor's touching me in places Daisuke had never even touched me yet. My parents \
spent almost everyday with me but I was deprived of my Daisuke's comforting brown eyes. I didn't like it here. I didn't like it here at all.
I sat up and stared at the white wall diagonal from me. I felt like that wall, naked and empty. I stayed in the same place all the time and I had been there so often that people say me here as a wall, something always here. It can't be natural for a twelve year old to have this problem. To be scared of going outside, not knowing who is gonna come up on you and try to hurt you. To want to stay in the same place even though deep inside you want out so bad. Oh the trouble I feel, troubled me.
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries
Trouble me, on the days when you feel spent
Why let your shoulders bend, underneath this burden when my back in sturdy and strong
Trouble me
That night I laid slightly on my bed while my mother sat to my side and watched me like a hawk. She was always concerned about me but this, this terrible event, made her worry even more.
"Ken, honey? The nurses say you won't eat a thing? Why won't you eat? You'll feel better" She said with a concerned voice. I stayed silent, not answering my mother as I usually do. "Ken, what could I do to have you eat. Three whole days of not eating, your gonna get sick".
"I want to see Daisuke" I simply told her as I turned my back facing her. She gave a desperate sighed and pulled her chair closer to my bed.
"Maybe if it's possible, I can bring Daisuke to see you tomorrow." She suggested. My face lite up, nothing matter around me now. I was most likely going to see my Daisuke tomorrow. "On the event that you eat something" She ended.
That night I slept very well, unlike the other days of being in the hospital. I watched some television and slowly fell asleep to the sounds of television. I woke up that morning and strangely the first thing that popped into my head was the exact moments I was being raped by Osamu. I sat up immediately and looked around the room, I was ok. I shook my head as I turned around to see Daisuke right in my face. Before anything could be comprehended or said my lips were being crushed by him, gently. I had always missed him kissing me, it was so unique the way he did. I left him release me, to my great disappointment.
"Ken, you look so sick" Was the first thing he said to me as he released me from my bliss.
"Just haven't eaten a lot" I told him, turning away from him.
"Well, that kinda sucks man. Your gotta be strong for the trail" He told me as he brushed my cheek with his naked hand.
"I know but there is no point. Why do they need a trail, they got his hand prints all over my cloths and body, what more proof do they need?" I asked looking right at him.
"You don't want to be in the same room as him, do you?" He asked.
Right after he asked me that I completely broke down in his arms. I cradled myself and cried so hard. Daisuke made me break my self-embrace and slowly I put my arms around his shoulders and he wrapped his arms around my waist. He pulled me close and let me cry, to be true it felt nice to cry, I haven't for a long time. I felt his lips all over my tear-soaked face, he was perfectly gentle. I felt so troubled still, trouble me.
Speak to me
don't slip me, the call I feel means a stormy swelling
Speak to me
There's no telling when it's dark to hollowness
Speak to me
Why are you building thick, thick wall to defend me?
Speak to me
When you silence is my greatest fear?
Why let your shoulders bend, underneath this burden when my back in sturdy and strong
Trouble me
A week later my court date arrived. I was lucky to have Daisuke and my parents sitting in that courtroom for support. I don't think anyone can understand how hard it is to sit in the same room as the same person that had given you the worst torture in the world. When I saw him enter the room the first thing he did was look at me and give me that disappointed look that seemed a little too familiar for my liking. I turned back and looked at Daisuke and my parents. Daisuke gave me a faint smile while my parents gave me the most concerned look I had ever seen from them.
"Will Ken Ichijoji (a/n:sorry if I didn't spell it right ^_^') approach the stand" The judge order. I got up and sat in that small place beside the judges spot and looked at Osamu one more time.
"Please, Mr Ichijoji, tell me in your own words what happened on the night of April 27th ?" The judge asked me.
I looked out at everyone. I was so nervous, more nervous then ever before. This wasn't fair to me, I felt so wounded by what Osamu had did to me and now they put me in front of these people and order me to tell them what happened that night, if it were up to me I would run away and never want to look at any of them again! But then again what would I do without Daisuke? Or my parents? With that plain thought in mind I began to speak.
"That night, I came home from school to show Osamu my test that he had helped me study for the night before. I came out with a 78%, which wasn't my best but it was a far pass. When I showed it to me he was upset that I could only get that mark out of all that studying. He gave me and slight beating and dragged me to his bedroom" I stopped for a minute to pushed back the tears and to gather more strength. This wasn't fair to me, I was so troubled, trouble me.
Let me
have a look inside these eyes while I'm learning
Let me
please don't hide them, just because there tears
Let me
send you off to sleep with a bad, bad dream that has you turning and tossing
Let me
let me know where the hurt is and how to heal.
Spare. Spare me! Don't spare me anything! Trouble me.
I went on and on until I couldn't go on anymore. I burst out into tears and looked at Osamu again. He was furious with me, but then again he seemed to look slightly guilty, I can't tell his feelings. I drained my tears back and was about to go on but I was stopped by the judge.
"I think I've heard enough. This is truly one of the most sick and disgusting things I have ever heard. I sentence Osamu Ichijoji to fifteen years in jail, two years of parol and he will receive therapy and mental help throughout those seventeen years. Case is adjured." He hit his mallet on his desk and the case was over. I felt a sigh of relief but when I turned back to my brother, as he was carried off by two men in informs. I was sad but still relieved that he can't hurt me hurt me anymore. But I am still troubled, trouble me.
Trouble me, disturb me with all your cares and your worries
Speak to me, let our words be our shelter from the storm
Let me, and lately let me know what I've command.
There's more honesty then my sweet friend, you can see. Trust is what I'm offering.
If you trouble me.
I'm still scared, but I will be alright in a while. All I know is for the next seventeen years I am out of my brother's grasp. I will be safe and maybe if I am lucky, he will never find me. If he does find me, I am looking at a life of hell. I know he the least he would do is kill me. Maybe I am worrying to much about this. I have time to do something about it, but until then I am free and safe in the arms of Daisuke and my parents.
A/n- see I make things a little better right??? There will be a next chapter but I am unsure what song I will do it with. It might take a while I have to finish 'yeah, Cody's lost it', "Tracey and Kendryn' 'Jaded' and this before I can move onto my Yolei and Ken story and my Kouichi and Izumi story. I'm trying here people -_-;;