A/N: Ok, well I finally have found a place to go, with this next chapter
that is. Not for the whole story. I never actually intended to write
anymore than one chapter, so that's why this has little plot. Well, so far
Ron has died, Hermonie is trying to get over his death and now she is
comforting herself in this chapter by shutting out everybody else. Ok, not
original, but it fits with the story so far.
Disclaimer: No, no and no.
Chapter Three:
Solace and Solitude (In Hermonie's POV)
I'm angry at a lot of things. He left me for one. I'm angry he's gone, I'm angry I'm here without him. I'm angry that that's something I'm going to have to go without for the rest of my life. I'm angry that I'm sad and I'm sad because I'm lonely.
Days go by and I don't even notice. I'm angry that I don't notice, or more to the core of my irritation, I'm angry I don't care to notice.
The sun rises, the sunsets and I'm still where I was the day he died. It's not that I'm not going forward, It's that I'm not moving at all. A step backward would be a movement, maybe not a good one, but I would at least be going somewhere.
The more I stand still mentally the more physically I feel drained and the less emotion I can handle. I wish I were numb.
People don't think to leave me alone. They say amongst one another: "She needs help, she needs comfort and she needs us."
I don't need them. I don't need help or their comfort. I need solace, I need solitude, and they still don't understand. I sleep, I wake and they are still there. I talk and they answer. I take and they keep giving, I wish they'd stop giving.
I still do all the usual daily things I did before, but apparently I'm fragile. I'm supposed to be handled with care, Because I'm incapable of caring for myself, or so they say.
I feel guilty for something that still remains officially un-named. I have my thoughts as to what it is, guilt for my anger.
Why I am angry isn't clear to me, and I think my guilt comes from not knowing. I'm used to knowing. I should know. I'm Hermonie Granger, I know everything. So why don't I know this?
"Because it's not in a textbook, that's why."
Ron said to me, "You always know the answer."
He said, "You're always right"
He told me, "Not to give up on things you know you will eventually understand."
But Ron said a lot of things, and now he's dead, so what do they matter?
Please Read and Review!
Disclaimer: No, no and no.
Chapter Three:
Solace and Solitude (In Hermonie's POV)
I'm angry at a lot of things. He left me for one. I'm angry he's gone, I'm angry I'm here without him. I'm angry that that's something I'm going to have to go without for the rest of my life. I'm angry that I'm sad and I'm sad because I'm lonely.
Days go by and I don't even notice. I'm angry that I don't notice, or more to the core of my irritation, I'm angry I don't care to notice.
The sun rises, the sunsets and I'm still where I was the day he died. It's not that I'm not going forward, It's that I'm not moving at all. A step backward would be a movement, maybe not a good one, but I would at least be going somewhere.
The more I stand still mentally the more physically I feel drained and the less emotion I can handle. I wish I were numb.
People don't think to leave me alone. They say amongst one another: "She needs help, she needs comfort and she needs us."
I don't need them. I don't need help or their comfort. I need solace, I need solitude, and they still don't understand. I sleep, I wake and they are still there. I talk and they answer. I take and they keep giving, I wish they'd stop giving.
I still do all the usual daily things I did before, but apparently I'm fragile. I'm supposed to be handled with care, Because I'm incapable of caring for myself, or so they say.
I feel guilty for something that still remains officially un-named. I have my thoughts as to what it is, guilt for my anger.
Why I am angry isn't clear to me, and I think my guilt comes from not knowing. I'm used to knowing. I should know. I'm Hermonie Granger, I know everything. So why don't I know this?
"Because it's not in a textbook, that's why."
Ron said to me, "You always know the answer."
He said, "You're always right"
He told me, "Not to give up on things you know you will eventually understand."
But Ron said a lot of things, and now he's dead, so what do they matter?
Please Read and Review!