Disclaimer: Weiss gehört mir nicht. Weiss, ce n'est pas à moi. Taint Moine.
Frustration - Ages 17 and up
By Felflowne aka Espion
BLOODY HELL!
I slammed the door behind me with every ounce of frustration I was feeling.
DAMN BLOODY BLOODY DAMN DAMN DAMN!
What a good thing that these words were in my head and couldn't be heard.
But then, from outside.
'Did you hear that?'
'Was that Omi's voice?'
'No way, he never swears, right?'
Oh no. Oh no no no. I'd been yelling out loud and every single person in the Koneko must've heard me.
Then, another voice rose above their chatter.
'No, that's our houseguest, Kiito. He yells a lot. Ignore him.'
Despite myself, I laughed. That was possibly the most pathetic lie Ken had come up with yet. But it worked. The girls' worried humming changed instantly to joyous interrogation.
'OOH! You have a houseguest?'
'What's he like?'
'Is he cute?'
'I bet he isn't as cute as you!'
I sighed, letting my head drop, unsupported. Girls. I'd never understand them. But then again, I didn't understand other guys either… heck, I didn't even understand myself.
Like right now. I didn't understand why my hands were trembling. The anger had faded, hadn't it? Course it had. No worries.
I pushed off the door, standing upright. Unconsciously, I ran my hand through my hair.
It had happened again.
**
'Sorry, we're closing.'
I didn't have to shout. There were only a few people left. They paid, and went on their way. I was glad. I didn't think I could cope with any more stress today. Plus the fact that on the spur of the moment I'd invented a completely fictitious person whom the girls would now be asking about for weeks. Bah.
I'd never heard Omi swear that loudly. Sure, he swears, but usually it's under his breath. He sounded REALLY mad. Oh dear.
Of course, you've all guessed, haven't you? It's my fault. Yeah, go on, have a go.
I sighed, pushing the cash drawer closed. It went 'ting'.
Steeling myself, I walked out back.
**
I heard Ken come in. I could tell by the swish that he was wearing his apron still.
'Um, Omi… the girls heard you swearing.'
I sighed.
'Yeah, I thought they might. I'm sorry.'
'It's OK, just…er…'
I looked up at him. It was a mistake. He was looking straight back at me, his face turning an adorable shade of pink. He leaned forward, and I did as well…
'Is dinner ready yet?'
We jumped back, stung. Yohji was stood in the doorway, yawning. He didn't see us.
'No,' I snapped, turning away swiftly.
'Geez, only asking,' grumbled Yohji, ambling out.
I kept my gaze firmly in the centre of the pan I was stirring. Ken hovered for a second, then retreated, and I could breathe again.
GODDAMMIT!
I threw a pinch of salt into the pan viciously. It kept happening. We'd just be talking, or sitting on the couch, or helping each other in the back room, when suddenly we'd just stop and the world would freeze, and we wouldn't be able to look away from each others' eyes. Then, we'd be drawn together…
I threw another random ingredient into the pan and pitied those who had to eat it. God knew what was in it by now. I sniffed. Ugh.
And then something would ALWAYS happen. Usually, it would be Ken drawing away and acting as if nothing HAD happened, or sometimes, like just then, we'd be interrupted… And I was always left feeling so MAD. So FRUSTRATED!
What THE HELL was going on? If nothing interrupted us just once, would we kiss each other? No way. But… realistically, what else could our actions possibly be leading to?
I tried to stir the pan's contents but found the spoon was stuck fast in some kind of rock hard inedible goop.
OH BLOODY HELL!
**
'Never mind him, it's healthy for a boy his age to articulate,' said Yohji, without looking up.
I glared briefly at him then sat down, bored.
I was worried about Omi. He'd been getting so angry recently. I'd tried to apologise, but he'd just looked at me in this really odd way, like he was exasperated, sad and amused all at once.
We were still friends, right? I could still be his friend… even if I…
I grumbled nonsensically to myself under my breath. Just what was I doing, every time Omi and me had one of our strange moments? No. It wasn't just me. Omi would react as well.
'Y'know, talking to yourself is NOT healthy,' Yohji said, chuckling.
'Shtup,' I mumbled. Suddenly the kitchen door banged open with such force that Yohji and I jumped a mile.
Outlined in the doorway, and angrier than I'd ever seen him, was Omi.
'We,' he said, in a terrifyingly calm voice, 'Are. Having. TAKEOUT!'
**
'That's some temper you've got, Omittchi,' said Yohji, as we sat around the kotatsu, 'I don't know, cursing at our customers, and now this…'
'I said I was sorry.' And I was. I hadn't meant to let my unhinged-ness affect those around me.
I looked up. Ken was looking at me. I looked back into my takeout box. Geez. I can't believe I screwed up dinner. Bleh.
The others didn't seem to mind, tho', I decided, looking around. Aya was eating his in silence: Translation - Woo! Takeout! Yohji was slurping his disgustingly. Ken… Oh no…
I forced myself to look away from the sight of Ken slowly licking his chopsticks. Bad Omi. Against my fiercest will, a blush spread itself across my face. I could feel it. Soon, the others were going to notice. Bluff.
'Ack!' I exclaimed, completely non-convincingly, 'I bit my tongue!'
'Get some water, quick!' Ken advised, and looked up at me. I saw him take in my flushed face in confusion.
'OK.'
I dashed out and into the kitchen, slamming the door.
**
'How bizarre,' said Yohji, then began humming a little tune. He ended, 'How bizarre, how bizarre.'
'Biting your tongue hurts,' I said, wincing slightly.
'Yeah, it does,' Yohji said, 'but it doesn't make you blush, as a rule.'
I didn't answer. There was a gurgling noise from the kitchen.
**
Right. This blush was gonna get it. I'd filled the sink with icy cold water. I peered at the surface of it, and I looked back at myself.
Geez Omi, you are one freaky little insect.
I peered closer.
Was I ever going to look my age? Or was I destined to remain looking about fourteen for the rest of my life? The blush burned my cheeks. I plunged my hand into the reflection, destroying it viciously.
I wanted something. And I wanted it so badly it was driving me insane. Could it be…? Was that it…?
I didn't let myself think anymore, but plunged my head into the sink.
And then I was forcibly removed by someone grabbing my shoulders and pulling.
**
Omi toppled back, soaking me and him as we overbalanced and fell over. He landed heavily, but luckily it was on me, so he wasn't hurt. He was gasping for breath.
'Omi, just what exactly did you think you were…?' My question just stopped, because he was looking at me. When someone looks at you that way, you don't ask stupid questions.
**
I put my hands on Ken's shoulders, holding him still on the floor. He wriggled and managed to break loose.
'Omi…' he began, and managed to half sit up, but I'd had enough, I couldn't take it anymore.
'Ken,' I growled, 'if you don't kiss me right now I might actually kill you.'
**
Huh…? Had I heard him right?
'Kiss you?'
He nodded, the same murderous expression on his face, but I wasn't angry, or frustrated. I was relieved. Because then it all made sense. Of course I could. It was…
'I don't particularly want to die,' I murmured, and leant forward. Our lips brushed lightly, and I was about to lean into him more when Yohji and Aya came in.
'What THE HELL are you doing?'
We both looked up at them, then at each other, then back at them, and then yelled in unison.
'GO AWAY!'
They went. Woohoo.
**
I gasped as Ken kissed me again. The thought of just how frustrated I would have been if I'd been kissed like this before and then he refused to do it again made me smile against his mouth.
I felt him smile as well, and then he pushed forward so he could get up. I went to stand too, but found myself captured and lifted off the ground. I giggled, struggling a little, but Ken's arms tightened around me warningly.
'I'll drop you,' he said.
My eyes widened.
'You wouldn't da-ARGH!' I was falling. Bastard. He pretended to drop me.
'I'm a bastard, am I?' Ken said, amused. I blushed. Ken grinned.
'Kawaii,' he teased, then kissed me so passionately I almost flopped out of his arms onto the floor.
'Ken,' I breathed. He let me put my feet on the floor again, but we both knew that wasn't where they belonged.
**
I slid my arms around Omi and held on tight, just enjoying him being so close to me. God. If we'd actually been unknowingly denying ourselves this contact that we'd both craved for so long, then no wonder we were both so…
Hmm, no word really fit there. Desperate? Almost, but not quite. Eager? That was closer. I did want him, and I wanted him NOW, but it was alright, because he'd always be there. He'd never abandon me. I knew it in my heart, and I knew that he knew the same about me.
I moved away slightly and dipped my head into his, touching his mouth infinitely gently, and whispered - 'Love you.'
He gave a little groan and pressed back, inviting me in, tangling a hand in my hair so I couldn't escape. Haha. Yes, escape was at the forefront of my mind. I broke away, only to have him petulantly kiss me again, and again… good God… I let out a gasp and held him away for a second.
'Ken?' His voice was little. He sounded scared.
'It's… It's OK,' I managed to say, breathing hard, 'j-just… take it easy…'
'All right.' Omi snuggled against me, fitting perfectly. I dipped my head to whisper to him.
'I'm sorry I drove you crazy.'
'I'm already crazy,' Omi shrugged, but smiled, 'love you, too.'
There was a crash as the door suddenly opened. Yohji blinked.
'Ahh, woops. Must've leant on the door handle. Don't mind me.'
The door shut again.
We just looked at each other. Then we burst out laughing. I cut him off by kissing him again, with all the urgency I felt. He melted against me, mewing adorably.
**
'Ah…' I had lost all my powers of speech. It just felt too good. Then I had a mischievous idea. I pulled away and whispered it to Ken, who fought not to laugh, then nodded eagerly.
We moved silently to the door. Then I nodded to Ken, who grinned, and let out a very suggestive moan, a huge smile on his face all the time.
I replied with a similar noise, and we had a conversation of sorts, only hopefully it would stop soon, because it was affecting me rather acutely…
Just in time, Ken grabbed the door handle and pulled the door open, leaving us face to face with Yohji, and, very surprisingly, Aya. Both wore expressions of mingled astonishment and horror.
**
I paused. Only Omi could pull this bit off. He smiled sweetly at our team mates.
'Yes?' he asked, in such a cute voice that no one could remain unaffected. Aya and Yohji actually looked ashamed! Yohji Kudou, ashamed? A once in a lifetime sight, my friends. Muttering, they both backed away, mumbling apologies.
Omi smiled with brilliant innocence at them as they backed further away, finally turning and running. Omi watched them go, the same butter-wouldn't-melt expression on his face.
Hmm.
I snuck my arm around him swiftly and spun him, pressing him against the wall. Surprise was still playing over his face as our mouths met, and for just a moment, I could taste his innocence. Nice.
**
Ooh sly, caught me out there. Honestly, voyeurism, or whatever the listening equivalent is, whatever next…?
My thoughts trailed off as I tried to pull Ken closer, even though our bodies were together already. Good God, I'd never wanted anything… anyone…as much as I wanted him right now.
And he noticed. He leant in, and I craned my head forward, but he slipped his head into the crook of my neck so his lips were barely touching the skin and I could feel his breath, irregular.
**
I stifled a groan as Omi leaned his head back and moaned, arching his body against me. Then I spoke.
'Omi, what do you want?'
'Ken!' He groaned, annoyed at being teased.
'Answer me,' I chided, then slipped a hand under his T-shirt and let it play up and down his back.
He yelped, as I'd known he would. Then, so quickly it made me jump, he brought his hands up and pulled my head from its place on his shoulder and crushed our lips together insistently, mumbling as my hand traced over his ribs, lightly.
I pulled back.
'Ah. Ah. Ah.' I said, grinning at the expression on his face. A mix of bliss and annoyance, 'you didn't answer yet.'
'Baka,' he whispered, quivering, 'I want you, of course. I've never wanted anyone so badly.'
I was flattered, and I showed him.
**
'Ah!' My whole body was shaking. Good God, what the hell did he just do? He was watching me, a smile playing on his face.
'Did you like that?' he asked playfully, pecking down my throat, gently. Unable to speak, I nodded vaguely.
I felt rather than saw him smile against me.
'I'm glad,' he said, in the same low voice, 'because I want you to be happy.'
'Ken, please,' I was practically begging. Pathetic, I know, but come on! Was it you in this situation? Hah! No, so shut up. Heh heh, jealous?
He was looking at me, so I gave him my best smile, the one I know that he loved even before we fell in love.
'It would make me happy,' I said, and felt his arms tighten around me.
Then he pulled away but kept hold of my hand, squeezing it.
'All right. Come on.'
I heard the kitchen door shut behind us.
**
Still panting, I reached for his hand. He gave it to me with a small smile, and laced his fingers through mine.
'Thank you,' I said, and he looked astonished.
'For what?'
I blinked.
'I should be thanking you!' He said earnestly, rolling onto his stomach. I couldn't stop my eyes from travelling up and down his beautiful body.
'Wh-Why?'
He flopped down next to me, and I used a bit of my sheet to dry his forehead and cheeks.
'Because you fell in love with me. You cared about me. Even though I'm pathetic.'
I looked at him in horror.
'Who told you that?' I snapped, and instantly regretted it when he flinched away.
'Sorry,' I added, wrapping my arms around him and feeling him snuggle close.
'No-one,' he sighed, 'I just always thought…'
'Well, you're wrong,' I said firmly, 'you're incredible.'
He leant up and brushed his lips against mine.
'So are you,' he said, then laughed.
'What is it?' I asked. He smiled.
'I think there's a sock of mine in your wastepaper basket.'
'How did it…oh.' I grinned, and hugged him. God, I loved him so much.
'Goodnight,' he whispered, a hint of drowsiness creeping in, 'love you.'
I pressed the last kiss of the night on his forehead.
'I love you too, sleep well, Omi-kun.'
***************************
Felflowne: So kill me because I can't write lemons :P I try, I really do. But it's a combination of my own prudishness (and by the way I'm MORE than happy to READ lemons *^_~*) and the fact that I know that some people I know are going to read this. I.e. people I'm going to actually MEET. I just can't get over that. Maybe I will someday. I don't blush when I'm writing kissing scenes anymore. A definite milestone!
Another useless point. I found it REALLY hard to stay in the past tense here. Maybe I'll do a version in the present tense, see what it's like… but present tense stories always come across as a bit clumsy to me unless you're really careful. And writing in the first person… I've always found that a strain. Gosh, what a challenging fic!
Well, I wrote this in one night. It's five to four in the morning. Three hours sleep power. I just scared the hell out of my flatmate (who was VERY drunk) by opening the flat door just as he reached for the handle. His face almost made me cry, it was so funny! *^_^*
A…ny…way. Reviews are always appreciated. Didja know I posted a six chapter Harry Potter fic a few weeks ago and NOT A SINGLE PERSON reviewed? That made me sad L But you can all cheer me up!
*ignores yells of 'Why would we want to?'*
Yes, it's easy! Just drop me a little line via the box below telling me what you thought. Doesn't have to be long! Thanks a lot!
BYE!!
Felflowne aka Espion
Xxx