Title: Ice
Author: Ryo0oki
Warning: Pretty blatant hints of YY/S, set after Yami Yugi gets his memory, although the canon-ness is certainly questionable ;)
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It's cold.
It's cold and I hate myself.
It all came rushing back, didn't it? Everything I did, and everything I was supposed to do. Rushing, rushing, rushing, a torrent of everything that I didn't want to be.
I remember now.
Everything.
And what am I going to do? What can I do, but follow the path laid out for me? There is no repentance, nothing I have done in my second life can change or save me from what I did in my first.
So cold.
Hatred. Hatred of her, of how close they were, and of how he didn't belong to me. It didn't matter what they were to each other. It wasn't enough that he shared my bed- I could never have all of him. That fire in his eyes did not burn for me alone, and so I needed to change that.
I made him watch.
I don't know why. The second me doesn't, can't comprehend why my actions were. The second me says that it was irrational, stupid, I was killing our connection and destroying the carefully crafted trust we had.
I know. I wanted to see him suffer. How dare he embrace someone else when I had all he needed? How dare he love another when he had ME? He deserved what he got. It was his own fault that her blood ran, thick and sweet through the palace gardens, nourishing the flowers so much worthier than her.
All his fault.
All your fault.
And you cried, except there were no tears, and you begged, except there were no words. Oh, where was your arrogance then, my Priest? Gone. You cursed me and I bled her dry, and you swore your revenge on me.
I laughed. With her gone, you had nothing else.
You would return to me.
And you did.
Except you returned to kill me, and she was still by your side. Her eyes flashing in righteous fury, her wings spread and her claws ready to slash. It was her very essence, and you had captured her and placed her in the shell of a monster. And KEPT HER.
And you didn't see how much I loved you.
You were so blind.
It was your fault.
So I destroyed her again. And this time, I sent you with her. Do you- did you know? It hurt me. It truly did.
It's so cold in my mind now. Everything terrible has fallen into place.
I am losing myself and I am gaining control again at the same time.
My light. And yes, he is my light, because I am dark, and maybe it couldn't be seen before but now it's undoubtedly true. He is across from me. But he is weak and he will die soon.
Maybe I won't kill him. He has helped me; I remember it. No weaker or stronger than my other memories, just there. Maybe I will have him at my feet when the world is mine, as a reward for his courage, regardless of futility.
He plays a card face down and ends his turn.
My victory is coming. And then I will see you again.
And then I will have you again.
Maybe then it won't be so cold.
~fin
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This was a companion piece to 'Fire.' Go read it. But make sure you review first! ^^;; Please?
-Ryo0oki