Title: Western Thorn
Rating: PG-13 to R
Summary: It all started with a want ad in the paper. "Help needed for spring round-up. Cooks and experienced helpers needed. Call Sesshoumaru Taiyoukai at 407-555-BULL" Will this escalate into more than just a job? Sess/Kag pairing along with some San/Mir, Inu/OC, Kou/OC
Genres: Romance, Comedy, Drama, Modern Western, perhaps some slight angst
AN: I'm back. Anyone miss me? Someone once told me that if I wanted reviews to post under an R rating. She was right. Holy cow! I don't know if you people are sick or what. Then again, I can't really talk because I'm the one writing this. Keep up with the reviews people! Lilfrozenfire loves the reviews. You may notice that the POV changes. It won't yet, but it will. Don't worry though. It's easy to spot.
Warnings: Swearing and citrus in later chapters. Remember, this is obviously AU so therefore, slight OOC is expected. Also, they don't have a southern drawl. I decided that Sesshoumaru would sound stupid talking with that accent so don't imagine it. It's enough to make anyone laugh.
~*~
'And it's a shallow person who judges anyone by the way they sound. I'm so shallow I'm surprised I don't reflect myself,' -Nealon of Queenscove in Protector of the Small: First Test by: Tamora Pierce
Chapter Two
Sitting on the plane and watching a mother run after her child I realized one thing: I'm scared to death of heights. Maybe we should have driven. Sango and I left Green Bay and made it to Milwaukee with time to spare. We dropped off Kohaku and Sango's cat, Kirara, and boarded the plane.
"Good Afternoon, this is your captain speaking." Shouldn't he be steering instead of talking? "We are coming upon Clinton City Airport. Please put your seats in the upright position and buckle up. Thank you for flying with Shikon Airlines."
When the plane landed, Sango started trying to get my nails out of her arm. I didn't even realize I was clutching her arm. Oops. "Sorry."
I stayed seated as the guy in the other seat grabbed his bags. Is it necessary to lean that far in to grab a couple of bags? I mean really. His beer gut belly was right in my face. After he finally got his bag, I was able to get my bag. It took him 5 minutes to grab his bag and me one. Gee…I wonder what took him so long.
Sango and I found our bags on the carousel, a first for Sango she said, and looked around. I spotted a short, greenish man standing holding a sign that said 'Higerushi and Taija'. How hard is it to spell 'Higurashi'? I poked Sango and pointed at the man. She rolled her eyes and we went over to him.
"Are you from Taiyoukai Ranch?" I asked in my sweetest voice.
The man 'hmph'ed and looked at us. "Are you wenches the new cook and help?" 'Wenches'? Is that what he called us? I wonder if it's premeditated murder if I think of ways to kill him now.
Sango glared. "Yes. I am Sango and this is Kagome. Not wench."
"I couldn't care less. I am Jaken and I am the foreman for Lord Sesshoumaru," he said, puffing out his chest as if he were important.
I looked at Sango over his head and mouthed 'Lord Sesshoumaru?'. We both held in our giggles as we followed him to a white Chevrolet Silverado. He grabbed our bags and threw them unceremoniously in the box and climbed in the driver's side.
"How can he reach the pedals?" I whispered to Sango. She shrugged and got in on the passenger's side in the back. I got in on the passenger's side in the front and noticed that he was sitting on a pile of books and there were blocks on the pedals so that he could reach them. Now I know how.
After an hour long drive, courtesy of Grandpa Ugums, we reached a driveway that had a sign saying Bar T over it. He pulled in and hopped out. The green midget scurried around to the box and grabbed our bags. He came back and dumped them on the ground by the doors.
I wish looks could kill. He'd be dead, buried, and rotting. I got out and was hit by the smell of dust, blood, and manure. I put my sunglasses on and grabbed my bags. Sango came up beside me and watched as the green…thing came back, followed by a very, very, very tall being.
He stopped in front of us and looked us over. His long white hair floated behind him from his ponytail as his gold eyes took in our appearance. "Jaken," he said. Figures. It would have to be Mr. Emotionless, wouldn't it? Granted, he's cuter than I imagined. A lot cuter. I pictured someone who would look like my science teacher, not this guy.
"Yes, milord." He looked like he would have bowed prostrate if the giant asked it.
"Take their bags to their rooms. You two, follow me." He turned and walked towards the white three-story house.
He showed us the kitchen, dining room, living room, bathrooms, and where our bedrooms were, all…you guessed it…without saying more than two words.
He led us back to the kitchen where a girl already was. "Katrina. Show the girl how things are done. You, come with me."
Girl? Girl?! That jerk. I guess I must have been fuming because the other girl started to laugh. She looked at me with laughing gray eyes and shook her brunette strands out of her face. "Hello. I'm Katrina. You must be Kagome."
I took her offered hand and nodded. "Yep."
She looked at the door where the ice cube just walked out of and looked back at me. "Don't mind him. He's really a good guy, just a little…difficult. I'm glad you came though, if I had to put up with Jaken one more day…" she made a slicing motion with her finger across her throat.
I couldn't help it. I laughed.
~*~
We finished cooking at 6 o'clock. We set everything out on the island in a buffet style. The ham and other heavy dished were placed at the front and the salad and soup in the middle and then the desserts. I was pretty happy. Katrina told me to go wash up because everyone should be coming in soon.
6:30 and the troops plowed in. I noticed that everyone went by the kitchen sink to washup first and then went into line. When everyone was seated, it looked like there were about 75 people there, most were male. I spotted Sango as she went straight for the cherry fluff. There was a tall blonde woman and she went right for the chocolate fudge after waving at Katrina.
Sesshoumaru sat at the head of the table with a man who looked like him on his right and the green jerk on his left.
The blonde bit into the ham and swallowed. She looked up and smiled at Katrina and I. "Finally! Some edible food!"
"You better learn your place, wench," Jaken yelled, waving his cane threateningly.
"But, Jaken, sir, I know my place. And it's not in the grave because of food poisoning," she replied sweetly. I snorted into my soup. The guy with his black hair pulled up into a ponytail stopped looking at me long enough to smirk at Jaken and the guy sitting by Sesshoumaru started to chuckle.
That was pretty much how dinner went. Jaken made a fool of himself, wiseass comments, the usual dinner banter.
Eventually, everyone trickled out, except for Sango, the blonde, Sesshoumaru, his look-alike, the black haired guy, and Kristina.
"Kouga, you're drooling," Kristina said.
"You know, this is why I like dogs better than men. At least dogs stay loyal," the blonde said, glaring at the black haired guy.
"Feh. The only women who would work here are ones who can't find a boyfriend," the Sesshoumaru look-alike said. He glanced at Kristina after realizing what he had said and backed away as she picked up a soapy pot.
"Can't find boyfriends, huh? Maybe I should make it so that I have no boyfriend," she said, tapping the pot against her hand.
The blonde cleared her throat. "I think we should introduce ourselves before this gets totally out of hand. Hi. My name is Amanda and I am the chief hostler. This idiot who is about to get his brains bashed in is Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru's younger half-brother and Katrina's boyfriend." Ouch. No wonder he's going to die. "The guy who is drooling is my boyfriend, Kouga. And I assume you know the iceberg."
"I do. I'm Kagome and this is Sango." This is going to be a strange vacation. I have a feeling I will regret this idea.
"Now that introductions are done, perhaps we could talk later. Right now, I have a boyfriend to kill," Amanda said, glaring at Kouga. He started to back up, only to trip over the dog that just bounded in. "Hey, Lucky. Who's a good boy? Yes you are." The brown and white dog stood on his hind legs and licked Amanda's cheek before coming over to sniff Sango and me. No wonder Amanda likes dogs better. They're so adorable.
"Stupid dog," Kouga muttered.
"You're just mad because he gets out of trouble better than you," Inuyasha said as he ducked another swing from the pot.
"That is enough," a stern voice said. We all looked up at Sesshoumaru. His imposing height made it impossible for anyone not to be a little intimidated. "Finish dishes and get to bed. I expect breakfast to be made by 7 in the morning. And Inuyasha, stop acting like an imbecile." With that, he went up stairs, probably to his room.
As soon as he was gone, Amanda and Katrina glared at Kouga and Inuyasha. "Why can't you two be more mature," Amanda demanded.
"Tell me, how does foot taste? You seem to have your feet in your mouth more often than not," Katrina said. "Now out of the kitchen. We have work to do."
Inuyasha and Kouga walked out of the kitchen with their heads bowed down. "Men!" Sango, Katrina, Amanda, and I said at the same time. We laughed and did dishes. Maybe this will be okay after all.
~*~
I groaned as an annoying buzzing started. I looked at the clock and decided to hit it. 5:30 in the morning is a time for morning people. I sighed and settled for punching my pillow. I took a cold shower and got dressed in a light yellow sundress. No sense of ruining a good outfit.
I walked down stairs and saw Katrina setting out some eggs and ham. "Everyone who doesn't eat, gets yelled at and goes to town for food. First come, first serve. We don't have time to cook 75 servings of everything," she explained.
Sounds like a logical plan. "For lunch, we set out sandwich fixings. We have other things to do." She is obviously not a morning person.
The eggs were frying when the door opened. Amanda walked in wearing a t-shirt and overalls. "I hate mornings. Where the hell is the food?"
"It's coming," Katrina replied. The door opened again to reveal dumb and dumber with Lucky close behind.
"I'm sorry about last night," Kouga mumbled as he handed Amanda a single white rose.
"Me, too," Inuyasha handed Katrina a red rose.
Katrina grinned and started planting kisses on his face. "Thank you! I love red roses."
I looked at Amanda and saw her on Kouga's lap. This is getting a little annoying. Luckily, I didn't have to say anything.
"Keep personal matters private," Sesshoumaru said as he entered the kitchen. Oh…my…God. He cleans up perfectly. How does he keep his skin so white? Oh crap. I'm staring.
"Yes, boss," came the chorused reply.
Lucky came up and sat down in front of me, resting his head on my stomach. He's just so cute.
"And here they come, right on schedule."
~*~
I was stretched out on the porch swing, reading a book. I still think that Kel and Dom make a cute couple. I heard the clanking of boots on the porch and looked up. There was a man I saw from last night. I think someone called him Kagemaru. "Can I help you?" I asked politely. "By the way, my eyes are up here, not there." He's worse than my brother, and that's bad.
"Sure you can help me. It's been a while since I've seen such a beauty. Maybe we could get together some time," he said in a sick voice. I felt like vomiting. Gross. That has got to be the worse come on ever.
"Sorry, but I think not."
"Kagemaru. I believe you have work to do. Now do it." Great. Just what I need. Sesshoumaru to think this was my fault. Oh joy.
"Yes, sir," was the snide reply. He stood up, brushing his hand down my leg, and left. When did he kneel? Who gave him the right to touch me?!
I looked up into the cool glare of Sesshoumaru. A glare? It wasn't my fault! "You are here to cook, not on a romantic lark," he said.
I am now, officially, beyond mad. "Listen here. You may be my boss, but you have no reason to blame me if one of your hired help is a perverted prick. If I wanted a romantic lark, I would have gotten a job as a dancer, not a cook."
He raised his eyebrow and then walked into the house, slamming the door behind him. Jerk.
~*~
I know. A little short, but I wanted the next part to be in Sesshoumaru's point of view. *horns pop up* This is going to be fun. Not much humor in this chapter, but I'm a drugs right now so…yeah. Not bad drugs, just stuff to kill pain. Stupid doctors. Couldn't wait to remove my wisdom teeth, could they?
Review Responses (all thirty-some…I feel so special):
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Laer_Minuial: You're right. I visited the northern part and there were a lot of cows. I'm glad that my fic rocks and don't worry, I'll keep writing.
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Nankinmai: *snorts* What other kind of fic would I write? I adore Sess/Kag fics. There will be a plot soon and I'm glad I have such a huge fan. Keep reading!
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