I looked at her hair as she rounded a corner. It was a vibrant shade
of red, a shade that I wanted to touch. I bet her hair smelled good.
Probably of some sort of fruit. She always smelled like luscious fruits.
Her hair hung halfway down her back. I'd seen it when it was messy and when it was superbly straight. I wondered how she got it that straight; it was probably a girl thing, though. I wanted to reach out and feel the soft, oh so soft hair.
She hadn't given herself any highlights, I knew she thought them to be stupid and superficial. She thought that only people who want to change themselves give themselves highlights.
I wondered what her hair would actually feel like had I come out and touched it. Would it end up being hard, did it just look silky and soft, smooth even?
How would she react? I could almost laugh just thinking about the look on her face. She might think me mad. It would be true to the least. It wasn't that I was mad though, I haven't gone crazy. It's the feeling that comes over everyone when they fall in love. That feeling where you want to know everything about them. You don't even need a pencil and paper to remember it. You replay every conversation with them in your head. You daydream about them more than you would think was normal. And most of all, you regret. You regret all those times where you could have talked to her, that time you could have waved. Now you fear that it's too late and that she will never know your feelings. How was she supposed to know how you feel about her if you didn't tell her or show her. There were so many times that I could have just waved or walked over. It looks so easy when other people complete these tasks but they seem endless and impossible when trying to accomplish them yourself. Now that I had this feeling I lived for it. Every waking moment I was grateful for it and I knew that this feeling would never leave. A/N: Okay, I have to admit that this wasn't the exact route people thought I was going to take. In fact you probably found that lifeless and boring. I know without reading it over that it probably was but a review I got criticizing the way I write really changed my view on things. Now, I know I haven't put the detail that this reviewer wants in the story but I did put detail. This aspect of a story, I've realized, is most important. It doesn't matter how good the plot of a story is unless you have good detail so you feel what the protagonist is feeling. Learn to hate the same antagonists as the main character does. The story isn't any good unless you want the same thing the main character wants so this is why I wrote this chapter. I want everyone to feel what Harry is feeling even if they think it's stupid and doesn't sound like something Harry would feel at all. That's all I have to say. That and what I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving and that's that reviewer who really opened my mind to writing as well as a book I'm reading called Bird by Bird.
Her hair hung halfway down her back. I'd seen it when it was messy and when it was superbly straight. I wondered how she got it that straight; it was probably a girl thing, though. I wanted to reach out and feel the soft, oh so soft hair.
She hadn't given herself any highlights, I knew she thought them to be stupid and superficial. She thought that only people who want to change themselves give themselves highlights.
I wondered what her hair would actually feel like had I come out and touched it. Would it end up being hard, did it just look silky and soft, smooth even?
How would she react? I could almost laugh just thinking about the look on her face. She might think me mad. It would be true to the least. It wasn't that I was mad though, I haven't gone crazy. It's the feeling that comes over everyone when they fall in love. That feeling where you want to know everything about them. You don't even need a pencil and paper to remember it. You replay every conversation with them in your head. You daydream about them more than you would think was normal. And most of all, you regret. You regret all those times where you could have talked to her, that time you could have waved. Now you fear that it's too late and that she will never know your feelings. How was she supposed to know how you feel about her if you didn't tell her or show her. There were so many times that I could have just waved or walked over. It looks so easy when other people complete these tasks but they seem endless and impossible when trying to accomplish them yourself. Now that I had this feeling I lived for it. Every waking moment I was grateful for it and I knew that this feeling would never leave. A/N: Okay, I have to admit that this wasn't the exact route people thought I was going to take. In fact you probably found that lifeless and boring. I know without reading it over that it probably was but a review I got criticizing the way I write really changed my view on things. Now, I know I haven't put the detail that this reviewer wants in the story but I did put detail. This aspect of a story, I've realized, is most important. It doesn't matter how good the plot of a story is unless you have good detail so you feel what the protagonist is feeling. Learn to hate the same antagonists as the main character does. The story isn't any good unless you want the same thing the main character wants so this is why I wrote this chapter. I want everyone to feel what Harry is feeling even if they think it's stupid and doesn't sound like something Harry would feel at all. That's all I have to say. That and what I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving and that's that reviewer who really opened my mind to writing as well as a book I'm reading called Bird by Bird.