A/n: And yet…another 'one-shot/song ficcy' by me.
Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own any of the characters, or the song.
Full Summary: Peter is starting to get jealous and all of the action that his friends are getting with girls. He just needs some sort of special 'release' to make him happy.
~*~
(Peter's P.O.V.)
"I've never understood,
Why I always think about it.
And it's always on my mind I don't know,
I often wonder.
If things are going to change at all,
'Cause now I get the closest when I'm all alone.
'Cause all I want,
And all I need,
Could I please get it from you."
Oh, look, there's James with his girlfriend Lily. They're always snogging in public. I swear, they could go and shag in front of everyone with out even caring. Well, at least he actually has a girlfriend. And here I am, all alone, just being…me. Why do I have to be the ugly one in the group? Why couldn't I be good-looking with girls falling at me feet? I mean I could please a girl anyway that they could please one, heck, probably even better. But no, no one would want to have little ol' chubby Pete to touch her.
"I just wanna get laid,
Don't care she costs.
I just wanna get laid,
Everyday and night.
I just wanna get laid,
Don't care how good she looks.
I just wanna get laid,
Tonight and every night for the rest of my life."
And look who just came into the picture…Sirius and his girlfriend, Elaine. Okay, so I admit it. Padfoot is good looking. Not that I'm gay, but he is. Even other blokes, who are straight as an arrow, admit that he's a good-looking fellow. Even if he has a girlfriend, girls still swoon over him. He doesn't even have to do anything to get a girl, but when I want someone to get a good snog with, I have to actually try, but I still won't get it. I offer them money, but they still don't want to. How far will I have to go to actually get a decent amount of pleasure here?
"I ain't got much,
Just pictures on my wall.
It's not that much but it'll do,
My friends all laugh.
They have no sympathy,
I guess I'll be the last one to screw.
They say I'm scared,
And unprepared,
Could I please learn from you."
Yeah, there is that occasional 'frosting my flakes' session, with some 'special' pictures that I took of girls in the locker room showers after Quidditch practice, but that's not really enough. Sure, the others don't know about it, 'cause than they'll think of me as a sick freak, and it's possibly some way of stalking…but what do you expect from a guy that's really, really, desperate, like me? Exactly. I'm even pretty sure that Remus had done 'it' more times than I would ever do in my whole entire life.
"I just wanna get laid,
Don't care how much she costs.
I just wanna get laid,
Every day and night.
I just wanna get laid,
Don't care how good she looks.
I just wanna get laid,
Tonight and every night for the rest of my life."
Ah, and speaking of Moony, here he comes with his girlfriend, Charlotte. Ha, he looks happy, even though the full moon is coming up in a few days. Moony is more of the romantic type, than Prongs or Padfoot. He'll write poems to her, candlelight dinners under the stars, buying her roses, and sometimes maybe even some lingerie. Yeah, every marauder has something special about him, but what do I have special about me? Nothing. Except for the fact that I didn't get potty-trained until I was 10. But we don't need to get into that do we?
"I've never understood,
Why I always think about it.
And it's always on my mind I don't know,
I often wonder.
If things are going to change at all,
'Cause now I get the closest when I'm all alone.
'Cause all I want,
And all I need,
Could I please get it from you."
So, I guess your saying that things for me are not that bad right? That I'm just complaining to myself for no darn good reason? Wrong. Things are very, very, bad for little ol' chubby me. I mean, try thinking that you were a seventeen-year-old boy, that hasn't even touched a girl. Girls just think that I'm just a fat, little, rat that just hangs around with the marauders to try to be cool. I totally resent that. First of all, I don't like calling it fat I'm more 'pleasantly plump' if you ask me. Second, I'm not little, I'm just 'vertically challenged'. And third, I'm not a rat, I'm just turn into a rather large mouse. So…you could possibly see why that I'm totally desperate for some… 'action', right? Heck, I wouldn't care if she was ugly, or if I had to pay her. I would still be glad that I was actually 'having fun'.
"I just wanna get laid,
Don't care how much she costs.
I just wanna get laid,
Every day and night.
I just wanna get laid,
Don't care how good she looks.
I just wanna get laid,
Tonight and every night for the rest of my life."
The end.
~*~
Pictures by Allister.