See Prologue for disclaimers warnings etc…minor 5th book spoilers.
I would like to thank my reviewers for taking the time to comment – it kinda makes it worthwhile knowing other ppl are enjoying it too. Anyhow a big thank you to, darkanglefrmhell –short but sweet, Kira- this is me updating soon J, Mordicai I'm trying to keep Snape in character but its tricky, Ellen- I'm not overly sure how this is going to evolve myself! Blood garnet – a big thank you and finally my first reviewer Slrmn82- I'm going to keep Snape as sarcastic as I can just for you.
Chapter one:
Underwater eyes, an eels
Oil of water body, neither fish nor beast is the otter:
Four-legged yet water gifted, to out-fish fish;
With webbed feet and a long ruddering tail
And a round head like a tomcat.
From Ted Hughes 'An Otter.'
/ It's too sodding early! / Severus glared at the cowering hufflepuff first years, taking particular pleasure in singling out one especially inept member of the class. It was near the end of the second period and he still didn't feel in the mood to be conscious, let alone teaching idiots. And this was only the second day of term.
/ Damn Potter. /
Severus had decided that his conclusions yesterday about Harry's actions had been more the result of an overly tired, paranoid imagination and not because of some grand scheme of Harry's. Really it was quite ridiculous when he thought about it, as if the foolish, all be it somewhat attractive man, would have anything to do with him in anyway not related to the now extinguished dark lord. Scowling he wondered when his appreciation of Harry had gone beyond the Boy Who Lived persistent gift of not dying when faced with He-who-was-Very-Annoying-and-would-not-die-damn-him. Thinking about the irritating man had caused his gaze to harden further. Small, round faces contorted with barely disguised fear before hurriedly going back to mincing their fire slugs.
/ It's good to see I still have the ol' Snape charm. / Severus smiled without humour, his lips twisting unpleasantly, causing a collective shiver to run through the class and an enormous attentiveness to the tasks at hand.
Severus snapped his gaze back to the third year marking he was decorating with red ink. Beautifully crafted insults flowed from his quill tip along with constructive criticism carefully disguised in biting language; after all, if they failed potions they'd have to come back, so it was more in self-defence than from any truly altruistic reasons.
At least it was break time soon. A humourless smile again tightened his lips; he wondered whether once again he'd have the pleasure of Harry Potters company. He hadn't given him a chance to speak last night - the situation had put him off balance. It was too intimate, too personal to have him in his private rooms surrounded by familiar objects watching those brilliant eyes looking trying to piece together what he saw and fitting it together with his supposedly hated potions teacher.
When he'd first arrived to teach fourteen years ago the rooms had been bare apart from the necessary. But over the years little things had crept in. Things that belonged to him with their own small stories attached to them of places and people Snape cared about. A small potted plant, a new species of magical cactus Sprout had named after him stood carefully placed on a shelf. An ancient chessboard dating back to the time of Merlin himself lay on a small table between the chairs- a family heirloom he managed to wrest from the Ministry when they confiscated the family land and belongings after the first Death Eater trials. And most damning of all - a bookcase filled with all kinds of works from the brilliant muggle playwright Shakespeare to the philosophical treaties of Merlin. And of course the hoards of potion books. It was almost his mind laid out in print and bound in leather. Potter had seen it all.
Snape hated not being in control.
The curiosity was driving him mad. He wanted to know what Harry thought, how his mind worked. Those brilliant leaps of instinct that defied all known logical thought but were in the end correct.
But that was what his problem with the man was. Instinct. He did not know Harry any more than Harry knew him despite them being in close contact for seven years. The roles between them for this time had been too firmly established for anything other than a hated teacher despised pupil relationship not to mention Snape had no interest in children what so ever. Snape shuddered. But his instinct, his gut reaction now the child had grown into a man was quite different. He didn't recognise himself in the younger man or any other such romantic nonsense but there was a sense of possibility about him. A possibility of what, however, Snape wasn't even going to allow himself to think about.
The gong went, jerking him rudely out of his reverie. Showing no sign of discomposure Snape stood smoothly and began to make his round of the classroom making disparaging comments where necessary which were, surprisingly, few and far between.
/ On the whole not bad, not bad at all. / He allowed himself a smug inner smile.
/ Obviously my teaching methods are paying off or the law of averages means one class has to go near perfectly for every thousand cock ups. /
Drawing himself to his full imposing height he sneered down at the class. Twenty terrified faces stared back at him. Satisfied he had their full-undivided attention he swirled round stalking back to his desk. Sitting down he allowed his face to take on an ominous expression, there was always a place for the dramatic in his classroom as long as it was done by him of course.
"If you think this display of near coherent potion making has impressed me think again!" he hissed. Sat motionless, Snape waited for the for the sibilant resonance left in the room from his voice to whisper out.
/Really this room has quite astounding acoustics. /
"I demand excellence from this class and there will be truly dire consequences for anyone who disappoints me. Now clear up and get out." The children exited in a remarkably short time in a near silent blur of shoving elbows and escaping enthusiasm.
/ If only they showed as much energy entering this classroom as leaving it there would be more than a couple of competent potion makers leaving this school each year- damn the little sods. / Content that his increasing age was not mellowing him in the slightest Snape went back to the dubious fun of marking.
Five minutes passed punctuated only by the soft murmurs of the ancient stones settling and the scratch of a quill. Snape frowned; in his excitement of a single class actually going to plan he'd forgotten to give out homework assignments. His brow cleared, he'd give them double next time to rectify that oversight. Good humour restored, he got back to dismantling one delusional third year's belief that they might actually know anything of the finer points of potion making. He made a mental note to watch that one; they seemed far too inventive for comfort. Still it was good to see enthusiasm for something off the damned quidditch pitch.
A knock sounded at the door. Snape's head snapped up, he had known his moment of peace was too good to be true. The knock sounded again more decisively.
/ Potter… / Snape sighed quietly.
"Come!" he called out wondering whether his initial reaction of just locking the door might have been the correct one. Bright green eyes were soon locking with his, the door clicking shut quietly behind him. There was that damned half smile again; Snape began to fume internally but forced his face to settle into a foreboding mask.
" Mr. Potter I assume you're not here to discuss your latest disaster in the realm of Potions?" With some considerable effort Snape shifted his attention back to his marking.
"You weren't in your office." Harry said quietly.
"Your powers of deduction never fail to amaze me." Snape replied somewhat waspishly. He didn't know how to deal with this situation, he didn't want to and he didn't see why he had too. His own reactions to Harry were beyond intolerable, obviously this was his own problem but Harry made a convenient target to vent his mental disquiet on.
"Get out." This method of dismissal had worked for seven years previously; there was no reason to doubt its usefulness now.
"No, you said I could come and see you." Harry's light tenor voice carried disturbing traces of amusement.
/ The little brat is laughing at me! / A slight tremble disturbed Snape's outward composure but he continued to stare doggedly at the piled parchment before him. Making a decision his eyes flicked upward, if Harry was laughing at him he'd kill him and hide the body somehow. Or maybe keep him bound and gagged in his quarters. Snape's face softened, a sigh from Harry snapped him abruptly back to the real world. He rose menacing from behind his desk.
"Oh for the sake of Merlin - Potter spit it out." He snapped.
"I was wondering…" Harry trailed off.
"Yes?" Snape leant back against his desk as if bored, his arms crossed before him. This was more like it. Harry looked very uncertain in a very cute way. Snape mentally slapped himself. He was mellowing - there was no doubt about it. He seen it happening to some fine wizards and witches in the past. One day cynical and mentally coherent the next day keeping sweets in jars for visiting children and muttering about the glorious nature of pleasant interaction with their fellow men. Snape was a firm believer in the saying that sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Well maybe not just sometimes, being cruel all the time had worked fine so far with him especially with teaching. Snape felt himself digressing from the task at hand.
"What are you muttering about?" Snape was beginning to get frustrated with Harry's sudden inability to form sentences.
"Will you teach me occulmancy again?" Harry seemed to force the words out in a rush.
Snape's eyebrows rose of their own volition.
"I most certainly will not you little cretin! After your last violation of my trust you're damned lucky to still be here at this school and why on earth do you want to know that? Anyway Voldemort is dead I pissed on his grave personally." Snape looked horrified at what he'd inadvertently revealed. Harry began to laugh; it was a surprisingly soft sound.
"You're serious? Wait until I tell Ron!" Snape stormed up to Harry. Grabbing a handful of his robes he pulled him towards him until their noses were almost touching.
"Don't you dare little boy!" It wasn't actually humiliating but it was a little juvenile and would permanently tar his reputation as the master of rules and proper behaviour.
"Teach me."
"I'm already teaching you." Snape bit out.
The green eyes he was staring so forcefully at narrowed.
"You know what I mean."
"So it's blackmail now is it Potter – how very like your father you are." Snape tried playing his last card, it was a great stretch of the truth as it was Black who tried to blackmail him,but Harry wasn't to know that.
"I doubt that, maybe it's the Slytherin in me trying to break free. You were always telling me during the war with Voldemort to be sneaky and to stop being the noble Griffindor, it seems you've got your desire." The confident tone was back in Harry's voice, his face a picture of intent determination a light flush filling his cheeks.
Snape shakily released his hold on Harry's robe and distanced himself. For a moment it seemed that disappointed flashed across the face of the other man.
/ I really need to get laid. /
He closed his eyes. It might not be that bad, he'd just be extra careful about removing certain memories and locking his pensieve away securely. And moreover if the Dark Lord was still hanging on to his mortal coil somehow it might come in useful.
"All right but you have to clear it with the Headmaster first." Snape opened his eyes. Harry looked mutinous.
"Oh for Merlins sake you're not still hanging on to those ridiculous hurt feelings from your fifth year are you?" Snape laughed, a wedge had been driven between the golden boy and the Headmaster on the day of Sirius' death.
"It's not funny, what would you know about it anyway?" Harry said.
"I know a great deal of being used for reasons beyond my knowledge by both sides. You're not the only one Dumbledore left out some crucial information to." He said bitterly. He saw Dumbledore as the father he never really had but despite the old mans Griffindor origins he was Slytherin minded to a fault.
The gong rang for the end of break.
"Now will you leave some of us actually have work to do." so deep in thought over the coming lessons with Harry Snape's voice had lost it's usual premeditated bite.
"Of course Professor." A light teasing threaded his voice. And with one backward glance Harry left Snape to his roiling thoughts.
"I hate you." Snape whispered to the empty room.